A/N - Holy hell its been a while. Sorry it took so long but here's another chapter. Hope yall enjoy.Jim pressed his face into his pillow attempting to ignore that voices that were talking over him. He just wanted to get give more minutes of sleep; or five hours. He wasn't going to be picky.
"Doctor, I do not believe that threatening to inject the Captain with a hypo will wake him up."
The Captain groaned, "No hypo."
McCoy smirked, "Jim would do just about anything if it means not getting jabbed in the neck with a hypo."
Jim sat up and ran his fingers though his hair. "No, just yours. You're fucking insane with those things." He looked up at his friends and suppressed a yawn. "So ah, why are you guys in my room?"
"Captain, you were supposed to be on the bridge one hour and twenty-three minutes ago."
Jim frowned and looked at his chronometer. He never slept through this alarm. He went to bed late but he fell right asleep. Jim looked around the room and saw that his blanket was on the ground and his sheets were tangled around his legs. He sighed and ran his fingers through his
hair again. "I'll be on the bridge in a minute."
"I think you should come to sickbay—"
"Later, Bones," he said. Jim looked up at McCoy. "We'll talk later okay, Bones?"
McCoy didn't look happy but he nodded. "Right after your shift?"
Jim nodded and watched as Spock and McCoy walked out of his room. He fell back onto his bed and stared at the ceiling. His mind raced as he fought to remember…well, anything really. Jim closed his eyes and started to doze again.
He shot out of his bed looking around. "Bones?" He walked around the room and frowned.
When he didn't find a trace of McCoy or anyone else in the room he walked to his bathroom and took a shower. He rested his arms against the tile and leaned against the wall. He started to relax as the water beat down on his back.
Jim opened his eyes and looked around. "Dammit, Bones this isn't funny." He turned the water off before wrapping a towel around his waist. His eyes narrowed slightly when he realized that no one was with him. Jim got dressed and made his way to the bridge.
When he got there no one mention anything about him being late or the circles that were starting to form under his eyes. No one even said anything about him leaning on the side of his chair in order to stay upright. He yawned and signed off on a couple reports before staring ahead at the viewing screen.
"Bones? Where are you?" Jim walked forward. Everything around him was black and he could just see in front of him. He could hear McCoy somewhere ahead of him.
He started running towards the voice. Jim wasn't sure how long he was running but he finally saw something. "Bones!" He kept running until he got to the patch of light and what he saw made him freeze.
McCoy looked at Jim through swollen eyes and his lip was bleeding. "Get out of here, Jim!"
"Shit, Bones," he muttered kneeling next to him. He wrapped his arms around Bones and fumbling with the rope that bound the Doctor's hands. "I got you." Jim looked up when he heard
a familiar whine. "What the—"
A shot was fired and he felt Bones slump against him. "Bones!"
He opened his eyes. "Yes, Spock?"
"Are you well, Captain?"
He gave a single curt nod, but his eyes showed the he was concerned. "Are you going to see Doctor McCoy?"
Jim nodded and stood up, "Night, Spock." He walked into the turbolift and gripped the handle. Jim leaned against the wall and sighed, "Deck five." He poured himself of whatever Scotty had brewed up.
"Okay, think." He sat on his bed and downed his drink. Jim knew that he was dreaming and that the dreams had to be pretty bad if his blanket and sheets ended up like they had this morning. He put the cup on the night stand and lay back trying to sort out his thoughts, his eyes closing slowly.
McCoy left the sickbay, cursing Jim under his breath. He walked up to the Captain's door and chimed. When he got no answer he walked in. "Jim?"
He walked into the bedroom and saw Jim fighting against the sheets and stopped in the walk way.
The Doctor walked over and shook Jim's shoulder gently. "Jim?"
Jim groaned and continued to struggled against his blankets. "Bones!"
"Dammit, Jim, wake up!" He shook him harder, leaning over him. He watched as Jim opened his eyes. The Captain was breathing heavily and swallowed as he tried to calm himself down. His uniform was damp and sticking to him.
McCoy smiled softly and rubbed his shoulder. "It was just a bad dream, kid."
Jim frowned and sat up. He stayed as close to McCoy as he could without actually touching him. "Yeah, bad dream." He rubbed his eyes and saw images from his dream flashing before him. His eyes snapped open and he looked at McCoy.
"Wanna talk about it?" McCoy asked when he saw the distress in Jim's gaze.
He hesitated but nodded. "Just let me take a shower first."
"Alright." McCoy watched as Jim walked to the bathroom. He had walked in on Jim having nightmares before, but nothing like this. McCoy had seen the dreams that Frank and Tarsus had left behind, but this didn't even compare. Jim had never struggled or fought against something. It was even worse because Jim had been screaming his name and his face had been horrified and pale.
"Don't think too hard, Bones. I don't want to have to find a new CMO."
"So funny, Jim," he muttered. "What do you want to eat?"
He shrugged. "Not really hungry."
"Chicken salad it is then."
McCoy rounded on him. "You haven't eaten in almost a day. I checked." He took Jim's face him his hands and softened his voice, "Let me take care of you okay? Humor me."
Jim let out a feeble laugh, "Okay, Bones."
The Doctor froze, "Okay…"
"You never agree to anything that I sat that easily," he said his thumb stroking his cheek gently.
Jim shrugged and moved into him. "It's getting harder and harder for me to say no to you."
McCoy smiled and pecked his lips gently. "Love you too." He let go of Jim and walked over and took the replicated food. He set it on the desk and ate his as he watched Jim shovel his down without much thought.
He continued to watch him and he could see Jim starting to slip into his own thoughts again. He reached across the desk and grabbed Jim's free hand. The fork that Jim had been holding clanged to the desk and he met McCoy's gaze. "Jim, what's going on?"
"You ever had a dream and then a couple days later it happened?"
He shrugged, "I don't know. Maybe."
Jim got up and paced around the area. "I have, get them all the time. Most of the time it's just small things; I'll be writing a report and realize that I've written this before or having a conversation that I've already had. I don't want this one to come true, Bones."
McCoy got up and walked over wrapping his arms around Jim. "It's just a dream."
He shook his head. "I know how my mind works. I don't dream, Bones. I get nightmares about things that happened to me, but this…when I remember what I saw it'll happen."
The Doctor frowned and kissed his head. "Wanna tell me what happens?"
"Yeah." Jim walked to the bed and sat down, patting the spot next to him.
He shook his head and wedged into the space behind Jim and held him. McCoy could feel Jim relax into him. He rubbed his lower stomach gently, "So what happens?"
Nearly two weeks later found them in the transporter room ready to beam down to a planet's surface. The dreams continued but McCoy started staying in Jim's room at night, and as corny as it sounded, the dreams seemed to ease up.
"Bones, stand on my right."
"Jim, I think it's time for—"
"Just do it, Bones."
McCoy sighed and stood on Jim's right while the rest of the team assembled around them.
The surface of the planet was dry and desert like. There were a few plants that were a faint green and hinted at a scarce water supply. Jim walked by and nudged McCoy before looking around and assigning everyone their tasks. He walked around with McCoy, making comments every few minutes just so there was some kind of noise.
"None of these plants have any medical use."
Jim nodded and resisted the urge to run his fingers through McCoy's hair. "At least it's nice down here." He watched McCoy stand and look around.
"Yeah, it is."
"What's that?" Jim asked looking around. Somewhere near them they could hear a soft buzz. It lasted only a few minutes but Jim remained still and silent. "Bones, stand behind me."
Jim got in front of McCoy as a woman with shimmering silver skin emerged from behind a tree. He watched as she stepped closer to them, her soft purple eyes going over their forms.
"Captain James Kirk," she said as she smiled at him. Her eyes took in his body; she noted that he was ready to defend himself if it came to that. "And Doctor Leonard McCoy." The woman did the same thing to him. He was tense behind Jim, but ready to take action or hold his Captain
back if he needed to.
The two men watched her as she stepped closer. When she reached out her hand to touch McCoy Jim pushed him back and stayed in front of him. "You two will do nicely."
"What are you…talking about?" McCoy asked and looked around. He was still behind Jim but everything around them was black. He could feel Jim starting to shake in front of him. "Jim it's okay."
"Bones…" Jims gripped his hand and looked around. "Don't let go."
"I'm right here."
Both men stood there, their eyes searching the darkness for a hint of what was going on. Jim reached for his communicator and cursed under his breath when he felt that it was missing.
"Jim," Bones whispered and nudged him. Jim looked ahead of them and saw a faint light. He walked towards it but continued to keep McCoy behind him at all times.
It took them a few moments to get to the light but when they did they both froze and Jim narrowed his eyes making sure that his body was completely blocking McCoy's. In front of them there were three glass tubes that appeared to expand to the none-existent ceiling. McCoy moved out from behind Jim and walked up closer to them. "Our names are on these."
Jim walked up and sure enough, the tube on the left had McCoy etched into it, Kirk was in the center, and on the right there was Spock. He ran his fingers over his name and looked around again. "There has to be a way out of here." He grabbed McCoy's hand and started to walk around the tubes.
"Where is your First Officer, Mister Spock?" They turned and saw the same woman that had greeted them on the surface. She tilted her head to the side and repeated, "Where is he?"
"He stayed behind."
She frowned and looked Jim over again and her gaze lingered on McCoy. "Pity." She walked toward them reaching out her hand for McCoy and Jim pushed him back.
"I wish to examine him." Her voice was sweet and low pitched; a song-like quality to it.
"And I said no," Jim repeated and kept his eyes locked on her. "If you want someone to examine take me."
"Shut up, Bones," Jim hissed.
Her head tilted in the other direction and stretched her arm out to Jim. Her fingers were like ice as they touched his face, but her fingers barely touched him. Jim stood still and felt McCoy move closer to him.
"You will do."
"You're going to let him go?"
"Doctor McCoy will be transported to your ship."
Jim nodded and turned to face McCoy, "See ya later, Bones."
"Dammit Jim, don't do this." McCoy blinked and found himself on the bridge of the Enterprise. "What the hell…Spock, what's going on?"
"We are unsure. We attempted to beam the Captain to the ship but we were unable to do so. The crew and I have been watching the event from here."
McCoy turned and looked at the viewing screen. Jim was in the glass tube with his name on it and he had just enough room to move his limbs He walked down to the center of the bridge and gripped the back of Jim's chair.
The scene around Jim changed but he remained in his tube. In front of him a bleeding man was begging for Jim's help. Jim swallowed, "This isn't real." He muttered and McCoy smiled, willing Jim to remember that through this ordeal.
"Who is that?" Uhura asked standing by the railing.
"Frank, his stepfather." Jim closed his eyes and turned his back on the man. "Good boy, Jim."
"He's not even trying to help him," she said and looked at McCoy.
"Jim knows this isn't real…plus I hope he'd let the bastard die."
Their eyes stayed glued on the screen and next a group of teens all scrawny and pale were asking 'Jimmy' for help. Jim turned sharply and his eyes got wide at the scene. He shook his head and rammed his shoulder into the glass.
"Not real," Jim and McCoy whispered. Jim's eyes stayed glued on the kids and no one on the bridge had seen that amount of pain in his eyes. "They're not real." Jim repeated over and over again, his voice getting louder to drown out the cried from the kids.
"Don't ask, Spock. Not my place."
Slowly, the kids fell over and once the last one was down Jim leaned against the glass. His hands shook but his eyes hardened. "Not gonna beat me," he whispered. Jim looked at the woman that was holding him and his eyes darkened.
She simply smiled, nodded, and changed the scene. Security officers of the Enterprise flashed in front of Jim. "Those officers have all been killed."
McCoy looked at Spock, "And all on landing parties that Jim has led. She's making him relive his worst memories, she'll make him live his worst fears."
The half-Vulcan looked at the Doctor, "How do you know this?"
He looked back at Jim and gripped the chair hard enough to turn his knuckles white. "He dreamed it."
Spock was about to pose another question when Chekov gasped. All the eyes on the bridge focused on the screen and watched as a replica of their navigator begged Jim to save him. Jim kicked at the glass as he got lost in the false reality that was put in front of him. The crew watched as the dream Chekov fell and was replaced by Sulu who suffered the same fate as Chekov. After Sulu came Scotty and the Uhura. Jim struggled against the glass, his grip on what was real slipping from him.
"Stop!" Jim and McCoy both yelled. The crew members watching their deaths and their Captain fail to save them. They saw the toil that their deaths would take on Jim. Spock saw himself appear in front of Jim, arrows lodged in his side where is heart was located. The real Spock put his hands behind his back and watched as Jim charged at the glass trying to get to him. The illusion called out to Jim, telling him it was illogical and that there was no chance that he could be saved.
Jim just told him to shut up and continued to ram at the glass. The Captain watched as Spock fell on his side and he slid down the glass. He wiped his eyes, screaming at the woman.
"Doctor McCoy hasn't been there yet." Sulu pointed out.
"I'm last," he said softly and watched as a version of him materialized before Jim.
Jim looked up and his eyes got wide. "No…no no no no…not real." He closed his eyes as McCoy appeared to be shot by an antique looking gun.
"Jim!" The false McCoy called and Jim covered his ears trying to block out the sound. Another gunshot sounded and McCoy fell to his knees. Blood leaked from his side and another bullet pierced his chest. "Jim!"
The Captain looked up, his eyes lost. He stood and rammed as hard as he could against the glass. The crew and McCoy could hear bones cracking and Jim's groans as he tried to get to the vision. In his head McCoy begged for Jim to stop, to realize that he was still in a dream and that he was safe up in the ship.
The glass started to crack and that only seemed to urge Jim on. He kicked at the glass and when it broke away he ran over and cradled McCoy against his chest. "Took you long enough, kid."
He laughed weakly.
Jim frowned, "I-I tried."
"I know, Jim."
"You'll be fine, Bones." Jim kissed his head and ran his fingers through his hair.
"Love you, Jim."
"Bones?" Jim looked down and saw that the man in his arms was dead. He shook him, "Bones, wake up."
McCoy shook as he watched Jim fall apart over his body.
"Mister Spock, the transporter is energizing," a voice sounded over the comm and the Senior Officers rushed to the transporter room. McCoy rushed through the door in time to see Jim appear on the pad with his arms still trying to hold onto his vision.
The man looked up from the pad and saw his crew starring at him. He looked down and saw blood on his hands and his torn up uniform. He cleared his throat and stood, clearly favoring his left side. "Don't you guys all have something to do besides coming here to greet me?" Jim smiled at them and they just watched him.
"Captain—" Chekov started but McCoy stopped him.
"Come on, Jim, let's get you cleaned up."
Jim frowned and looked at them and saw the sympathy and worry on their faces. "You guys…"
"Jim, let's go." McCoy grasped his arm and led him to his quarters. He sat Jim on the bed and stripped him, cleaning him up and setting and healing his bones. "Get some rest. I'll be here in the morning."
"I don't want to."
He pressed a hypo to his neck, "You'll be fine. Promise." McCoy watched as Jim drifted to sleep. The Doctor undressed and pulled on a pair of Jim's sweats before crawling into bed with him. He pulled him against his chest and fell asleep.
He woke up in the morning to the feeling on fingers running through his hair. "Jim?"
"Yeah?" The voice came out raspy and cause McCoy to look up. Jim was stroking his head gently, his eyes taking in all the details of his face and body. He blushed at the intensity of Jim's gaze and at the attention he was receiving.
"I watched you die."
McCoy looked at him, "It wasn't really me. I'm right here," he said gently.
"I was holding you, just like this, Bones. I was holding you and I felt you…I never said I love you back."
He sat up and took Jim's face in his hands, "I know you love me. You don't have to say it for me to know it."
"You died. You all died and I just let it happen. You—"
"Shut up." Jim looked at him sadly. "I'm here. I'm real."
Jim nodded and swallowed crawling into his lap and resting his head on his shoulder. "So the whole crew saw?"
He rubbed his back, "Just the main bridge crew."
"Looked like a fucking pansy."
"They know what kind of person you are. They saw you try to save them. You're crew would do anything for you Jim. How many times do I have to tell you that for you to believe it? They're not your mother or Frank. These people trust you with their lives just like they trust me. You," he said lifting his gaze, "Are the best man we all know."
Jim laughed weakly and pecked his lips. "You're just saying—"
McCoy growled and flipped Jim onto his back and pinned him there. "I'm not just saying it. Yeah, you're dad is a hero and you saved the world, but that's not everything."
"Bones," he sighed starting to look uncomfortable.
"No, listen for once." He stroked his wrists gently and straddled his waist to keep him down. "You were there for Spock when he withdrew because of his mother." He gripped his wrists when Jim started to interrupt. "You played chess with him for hours and let him talk about it. You didn't say anything about him being emotional. You were you and that was all. You threw Chekov the birthday party he never had, you let Sulu teach you how to fence because you knew he would enjoy it even though you didn't want to learn.
"When Uhura came to you about Spock, on how to address him and to get him to open up, you didn't make any snide comments or rude remarks. You listened and you helped her, Jim. You've put your life on the line for your crew, your ship and the god damn planet. And you…" he kissed his fore head gently. "You got me through the worst years of my life. I had lost everything and was close to flunking out of star fleet but you were there. Didn't let me. You helped with come
to terms with what I did to my father.
"You've done so much for all of us. You saved my daughter, hell Jim she loves. She calls you Uncle Jim for crying out loud. If my little girl likes you, then you have to be a good guy. Even her dog likes you and he's never met you in person."
Jim laughed softly, "Love you, Bones."
"Love you too, your crew does to. The best guy we know Jim, that's what you are."
The Captain smiled softly and nodded. McCoy kissed his head again before kissing him slowly. He lowered himself onto Jim and moaned as he felt Jim's hands roam across his back. All the pent up emotions were pouring through the kiss.
McCoy ran his hands down to Jim's waist and played with the waistband of his briefs and nipped along his neck and collar bone. He felt the tension leave Jim's body when he nipped his shoulder lightly and he looked up at him. "I'll take care of you tonight."
A/N - So...whatcha think?