Naruto Uzumaki was nowhere near as dumb as everyone thought he was. He was actually smarter than the top student in his class Haruno Sakura. Deception was a true ninja art. Naruto has been mastering this art for years but soon the real Naruto would emerge. Would an idiot be able to paint the Hokage Mountain in broad daylight and not be noticed until he announced it? An idiot would've been caught by the squads of anbu that chased him after said event. No Uzumaki Naruto was a prodigal genius. Naruto played the part of the fool to lower peoples guards. It drew less attention to him in certain ways and more in others. Playing the fool also currently has landed him in the Hokages office after his sensei Iruka Umino caught him by luck. Well it was time for his coming out party anyway. Showtime
"Naruto why weren't you in class" Sarutobi asked leaning forward and resting his chin on his hands. He wanted to see how Naruto would talk his way out of this one.
"It was just history Jiji. I already know our history but I also live in the present not the past . Looking back is a good way o end up with a kunai in your front."Naruto said bored.
Sarutobi sighed as he pulled out a folder. After flipping through it he slid it across the desk to Naruto. Naruto picked it up and flipped through it. Finding nothing interesting by the look on his face he slid it back to Sarutobi.
"Yeah I know my grades are horrible. They are actually worse than I tried to make them." Naruto said earning a raised eyebrow from the Hokage.
"Hm is that so. You lowered you grades on purpose you say. Well since you skipped history today lets see if you know that." Sarutobi said
"Ok bring it old man." replied Naruto. Hook line and sinker sucker Jiji Naruto thought.
"Ok who was the Shodai Hokage?"
"His younger brother Tobirama Senju. The great uncle of Tsunade Senju the slug Sannin."
"Who were the other two Sannin?"
"Jiraiya the toad sage and Orochimaru the snake Sannin."
Sarutobi sat back and thought. Naruto is indeed smarter than I thought. I'm lad he didn't turn out to be a fool but I have to stump him with one last question. Sarutobi leaned forward smiling.
"Ok last question who was the red death of Konoha?" Ha gotcha his time. Naruto's smiled eerily .
"The read death of Konoha was my mother Jiji. Kushina Uzumaki Namikaze."Naruto said smiling at his known victory. Sarutobi had a look of pure horrified surprise on his face.
"H-how do you know that Naruto."He said stuttering
Naruto tilted his head to the side before answering." Well actually I figured out who my father was first I mean its really obvious."
"Wha-What do you mean obvious. Your father's identity is one of our best kept secrets." Sarutobi said. Naruto fell out of his chair laughing making the Hokage develop a tick mark over his brow.
"It's a secret my foot old man. How many blondes do you know in konoha besides the Yamanaka's? And anyway they are more of a bleach blonde then a sun bathed blonde like me and the Fourth. Also I read about the Kyubbi attack it said he killed it a bijuu can't be killed it pure chakra. So I figured he sealed it and died in the process making me an orphan. Put all that together with villagers calling me demon brat and killer and such and you have Naruto Uzumaki the last unnamed Namikaze and Jinchurikki for the Kyubbi no Kitsune." Naruto finished in a huff.
"I'm so very sorry Naruto" Sarutobi said saddened looking down at his desk. Naruto dismissed it with a wave of his hand
"Don't worry about it Jiji. Like I said the past is the past but I do need a favor from you." Naruto said.
At this Sarutobi looked up. yes I can help him somehow He thought.
"What is it? Whatever is it that you need?" Sarutobi said excitedly smiling.
"I need my mom's clan scrolls."Naruto asked. Sarutobi's happiness diminished in a flash.
"Naruto I-"was all he could get out before Naruto cut him off.
"I'll trade you the secret for paperwork."Was all Naruto said before Sarutobi appeared by a wall so fast Naruto thought it was the teleportation jutsu. Sarutobi opened a secret safe and went rummaging through it throwing things out of it every which way. In his haste Sarutobi threw a little orange book that landed in Naruto's hand. It had a very lewd picture on the front of a very big breasted brunette. Wiping his nosebleed on his shirt he slipped the book into his pocket holster. Looking back at the Hokage he saw the old man pull out a huge scroll. He tossed it to Naruto who caught it and fell on his ass.
"Damn Jiji is it big enough jeez."Naruto cried out. Sarutobi muttered something that sounded like "that's what she said". As Naruto stood back up he saw Sarutobi waiting there expectantly. He could tell the old man was jumping in excitement on the inside.
"Ok the secret to paperwork is…."The Hokages eyes widened "…behind the picture of the Hokage mountain. Naruto finished pointing at said picture. Sarutobi ran over to the picture and removed to find a note card. After reading it he slowly put the picture back and proceeded to bang his head on the wall.
"Stupid stupid stupid. It is so obvious. Damn kagebushins" he muttered as he banged his head repeatedly. Duing this time Naruto snuck out of the office swearing he would never tell the old man he put the note there when he 'borrowed' the forbidden scroll.