Not Completely, Altogether Here
Chapter 23 - A Beginning
I never caught Fiyero. He's pretty fast when he thinks his loins are in danger. I think back to the girly screams he let out as I nearly got a hold of the back of his jacket. Elphaba says they weren't so much girly as desperate.
I'm going to continue thinking they were girly.
Girly and desperate.
Right now it's late. My parents retired to their bed a few hours earlier. I was surprised when they told us where they were going.
Not sleeping had become such a norm to me that I couldn't believe I'd ever do it again.
Popsicle had laughed at me when I told him. Then he wished Elphaba and I fresh dreams before leaving the library and closing the door behind him.
Two hours later and Elphaba is still sprawled on the sofa, her head in my lap, a book in her hands. I've been running my fingers through her hair while she reads about our new life. Every so often she'll tell me about something interesting she's discovered.
"There's shopping, Glinda."
That was, of course, the most interesting information of all.
I developed a bit of a goofy grin on my face after that.
It's probably still there when I move my eyes away from the fire dancing in the hearth ahead of us. I look down to Elphaba, her brow still furrowed in concentration as she reads through her new glasses. They look great on her. Popsicle had given her the pair as a gift over dinner.
I, of course, burst into tears at how amazing they were treating her.
I love my parents even more now if that's possible.
Oz, I also still can't believe how much food I ate.
I can't believe I could eat!
"Why'd you stop?" Elphaba's voice breaks through my thoughts. I focus my eyes on hers as she looks up at me from my lap.
I realize my hands have stilled in her hair.
"Oh, sorry, just thinking is all," I tell her with a small grin as I resume brushing my fingers through her tresses. Every time I do I'm met with the wonderful smell of the new Rosewood oil she used to bathe in. A gift from Momsie.
I really, really love my parents.
And I really, really love this girl lying in my lap.
Elphaba has stopped reading again. I think she can feel the emotions my eyes are pouring into her forehead. When her gaze meets mine she looks surprised for a second. Then the brown of her irises soften and she's looking at me over the rims of her glasses with such intensity that I feel my throat go dry.
All my mind seems to be shouting is that this is our eventually. This is what I've been waiting so long for.
And it starts when Elphaba lets her book fall to the floor.
The small thud the spine makes when it hits the rug below finally spurs me into motion. My eyes never disconnect with Elphaba's as I slowly remove the glasses from her face. I set them aside on the end table gently with one hand, my other goes to rest itself on her stomach.
Elphaba's eyes instantly fall close the moment my fingers start rubbing a leisurely pattern over the thin nightdress she's wearing. Her lips part as her head pushes against my thigh. A sharp intake of air fills her lungs and as she breathes out her eyes rest half open on mine.
Oz, I never thought I'd ever see the look she's giving me now. Want mixing with need, need mixing with want. Both making me feel very, very warm. I can't help myself. Keeping my hand on her stomach I use my other to cup the back of Elphaba's neck. She knows what I want and slips her arms around my shoulders, pulling me down toward her as I pull her up.
Our lips meet halfway. My stomach feels like it's going to explode. Elphaba moans against my mouth. Her teeth rake over by bottom lip, pulling me further into her, closer. I whimper in bliss. The sound is so foreign to me. It makes Elphaba deepen our kiss. Her tongue slides along my lip and I eagerly open my mouth.
Oh Oz! We're really going to do this! And in the library of all places!
I don't care!
I need to not be sitting anymore!
Sitting up apparently equates to straddling Elphaba. Once her back is resting against the armrest, her hands slip underneath the trim of my nightgown. I let out a very unladylike noise as her warm fingers move up my thighs.
I need her out of these clothes.
I need to see her.
I need to touch her.
Our lips never part as my hands work to undo the buttons on her front. I'm nearly at the last one and about to slip my hands inside to pull it off her shoulders when I feel the heat of the fire die.
Opening my eyes the room is completely dark save for some moonlight streaming in through the far window.
"Better," Elphaba whispers as her lips press a wet kiss to the nap of my neck.
I can barely see Elphaba in this dim light.
Why is this better?
Why did she douse the fire?
I reluctantly pull away from Elphaba even as she moves my nightdress up to my stomach. I place my hands on hers, stilling her movements.
I can barely make out the confusion in her eyes. But it's there. I can feel it in the hesitant way she shifts below me.
"Elphie," I say softly. "Why did you put out the fire?"
I hear her sigh. "I didn't want you to… I mean with the fire going you'd…"
The uncertainty in her voice pulls at my heart. I don't want her feeling this way. "I want to see you, Elphie. I love every single part of you."
Elphaba's voice is so quiet I barely hear what she says next. "I'm green, Glinda. All of me... Every. Single. Part."
"And I want to see every single one of those gorgeous green parts." I reply softly. I lean forward and rest my forehead against hers.
Oz, even in this darkness the brown of her eyes is so light. She looks so afraid.
"I love you, Elphie." I whisper. I press a small kiss to her lips and then say, "Please, let me see you."
Elphaba lets out a deep breath against my chin. Her eyes move to the fireplace and then back to mine. I can see despite everything I've said that she's still hesitant. "Could we… just for this first time…?"
I don't want her to feel uncomfortable. I don't want her to hold back. If keeping the room dark helps, then I'd keep it dark forever to feel her touching me again. I nod against her forehead and I can feel her body relax beneath mine. Her hands are still holding my nightdress and she resumes pulling it up my body.
For some reason all the heat I was feeling before seems to have gone away. We aren't as frantic as we once were. Elphaba's movements are slow and paced. The kisses she's placing along my neck warm me, but the searing feeling from before never surfaces. I raise my arms above my head so Elphaba can pull the dress off completely. I feel myself shiver once the fabric leaves my body.
I'm suddenly cold.
I want the fire back.
I want our fire back.
Elphaba's mouth moves below my collarbone and I let out a tired sigh. Her lips leave my skin at the sound and her head comes up.
"What's wrong? Am I doing this right?" She asks, concerned.
The moon disappears behind some clouds and it's official. I cannot even make out the green of Elphaba's skin anymore. I can't even see her eyes.
"I need to see you, Elphie." The desperation in my voice startles even me. "I feel like you're invisible."
"I'm right here," She replies cupping my face in her palms. She presses a kiss to the side of my nose. I realize she missed when I feel them slide to my lips.
"Don't you want to see me?" My voice cracks as I say it. Oh Oz, I think I'm going to start crying. I'm half naked on top of the girl I love who wants nothing more than to have me and all I can think to do is cry.
I'm a pathetic mess.
"Of course I do!" Elphaba says. "I love you."
I close my eyes and breathe her words in deep. I feel her pressing another kiss to my lips, this time the heat is back. I don't know what she's done to change but her hands stay on my face as I beg entrance to her mouth. Our tongues collide again, Elphaba's back impacts the armrest again, my stomach feels like it's about to explode again. Her hands find their way to my front.
Oh… my… Oz.
They stroke my breasts and I think I've died all over again.
I can't even focus on kissing her because I feel like my entire body has turned to a pile of nerves. And when her thumb brushes over a particularly sensitive spot I have to bite my tongue to keep the loud moan from escaping and waking everyone up.
"Is this ok?" Elphaba asks, breathless and a little timid. I realize I'm not exactly being very vocal. She must be taking my silence as a bad sign.
So I open my eyes to show her just how much this is definitely ok when I notice there's a soft white glow falling onto Elphaba's left side.
I can see her.
In the silence I hear the tell tale crackle of a fire. I turn to the hearth. There's a small fire flickering over the logs. Only it's burning a dim whitish green.
Almost like moonlight in a forest.
It's falling soft enough over Elphaba for me to see her, yet still leaving some places of her obscured in the darkness.
Oz, when she does incredibly gifted things like this it makes me want her all the more. I'm kissing her feverishly again before I know what I'm doing.
"You're amazing, Elphaba Thropp," I beam against her lips.
"Mmhmm," Her voice rumbles in response. I can feel her mouth grinning against my own. It makes us both laugh.
A few moments later she lets me slide her nightdress down her body. And when she tries to cover her chest with her arms I lace her fingers with mine gently and give her a reassuring smile. I am definitelyhappy with what I am seeing. She's so gorgeous. Even her hair is an endearing mess sticking out around her head. Mine must look nowhere near as good as hers.
I press a kiss to her exposed belly. Her hands tangle in my hair, mussing it further.
I trail my lips upward; her breathing grows more erratic. I slip one dark green nipple into my mouth and she about shoves my head against her chest. Obviously Elphaba likes things a little rough. I lightly rake my teeth over the nub and Oz even her skin tastes fantastic.
"Glinda… more," Elphaba groans.
More? What? "Any more and I'll bite it off, Elphie." I chuckle.
Her eyes meet mine and the absolute arousal I am seeing reflected back at me nearly sends me over the edge. I lick my lips; they feel dry, and then bite onto her breast harder. Elphaba's back arches up to meet my mouth and she moans really loud.
"Too much?" I ask, worried that maybe I've hurt her that time.
But she assures me that no I have not hurt her and that she would very much like me to do that again, harder.
Correction and mental note to myself for next time; Elphie likes it very rough.
I don't see how she can be feeling anything other than pain with the things my mouth and hands are doing to her but all she has to do is look into my eyes once for me to know I'm doing exactly what she wants.
That night beside the magicked fire I realized lovemaking was difficult. In fact it might as well have been called love-fumbling… since, embarrassingly enough, that was all I seemed to be doing. Elphaba and I were so dissimilar in our wants. It really shouldn't have come as such a surprise but it was nonetheless. What had started so passionately at first dissolved quickly into a game of trial and error. Elphaba couldn't understand why I didn't like things the way she did. Every time she brushed her fingers feather light across my body she felt as though she was barely even touching me.
Of course that was the point. I liked being enticed while she liked things straightforward. She bit a little too hard onto one of my nipples and I had yelped. Elphaba about wanted to stop after that. She couldn't believe she had hurt me. I assured her all was well by pulling her down on top of me and kissing her until she forgot all about that silly love bite. I was determined not to let our differences stop us. In fact, for the most part, discovering hers made me feel quite proud of myself.
Proud enough to initiate more contact. Elphaba nearly sprung off me when she felt my hands slip into her underwear. I don't know what she was expecting but her reaction made me laugh.
"What'd you think I was? Some bug?" I giggled when her cheeks flushed a deep green.
"I thought you'd give me some warning," She had replied with a small grin.
It was becoming painfully obvious to us that more talking was definitely necessary. Which was odd as any romance book I'd ever read (which I will never tell Elphie about everlest she ridicule me for the rest of our afterlife) there was usually very little talking and a lot more grunting. The characters could just look into each other's eyes and seem to know what the other person was thinking. What they wanted.
When I look in Elphaba's I know she wants me… just not exactly how and where. Nor for how long or how fast.
Sex was definitely more complicated than I'd ever imagined.
When I finally got her underwear off and touched her for the first time I was afraid I had burned her. Elphaba was so sensitive! I barely had to press my finger against her and she would squirm. Which went against everything I had learned further up her body. Down here she liked being touched just like me.
"Oz, Glinda!" She kept repeating whenever I did something she particularly liked. I couldn't exactly find that little thing the romance novels kept talking about. I think they called it a pleasure nub or something. It sounded rather silly to me. I felt rather silly. I'd never had a problem finding mine whenever I… you know. But to be touching another in such an intimate way. Let alone to be touching the girl I love that way…
I couldn't believe I was touching Elphaba that way!
It was easy when we were fully clothed and all I could do was rub her. Now I was a bit lost and turned on and that made for a very powerful combination of confused feelings. Elphaba must have begun getting frustrated with me because at one point she took my hand and guided me to where she wanted me.
And I could tell she wanted me there because the 'Oz, Glinda,' she uttered was pretty unintelligible.
I slipped a finger inside her easily enough and found a rhythm. She felt incredible. Elphaba wanted more. So I slipped in another. She liked it varied. We learned later I liked it mostly fast. When she asked me to go slower I couldn't wrap my head around how this could be making her feel good. But it did. Oz did it ever make her feel good. So good that she had to turn her head into the sofa cushion as she cried out my name.
I didn't realize she had climaxed so I didn't stop moving inside her.
She ended up crying my name again and that time I knew. Especially without the safety of the sofa cushion to muffle her voice. I nearly came with her. We stayed very still after that trying to hear if my parents had woken.
"I think we're ok, Glinda," Elphaba laughed finally against my ear. I picked myself off her only to find her eyes locked on mine. She licked her lips before saying, "lay back."
Then Elphaba was on top of me, sliding my panties off and thanking Oz she wasn't allergic to water here because… Oz I can't even repeat what she said to me! When she said it though I blushed from head to toe.
I know this because Elphaba had said,
"Oz Glinda, when you blush, you blush all over."
I think I must have turned into a human tomato by the time her mouth was doing things below my belt line that I couldn't even begin to describe if I wanted to. I also must have been getting really into it as even Elphaba was moaning against me. All I could feel was her very talented tongue caressing me and this unbelievable pressure building inside my body.
Then Elphaba's mouth was leaving me and all I wanted was her back on me!
"W-what?" I ask between giant lungfuls of air. I hadn't even realized I was panting so hard. "Why'd you stop?"
Elphaba rubs the back of her head. My right kneecap is suddenly a little sore. "You nearly bucked me off you is all." She chuckles.
My jaw falls open. "Elphie! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to I-"
She presses her lips to the flat plane of my stomach and I stop talking mid sentence.
Her lips trail kisses up my torso, over my chest, along my neck and finally she hovers above my mouth.
"Care for me to try again?" She husks.
Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!
I nod far too many times than necessary. Elphaba laughs softly and kisses me, her hand replacing what her mouth was doing to me before I nearly sent her flying off me.
I still don't even know how I quite managed that feat.
I don't really care because now all I can think about is how goodElphaba feels moving against me. I urge her faster. Meeting her strokes with my hips.
As I bite my lip to keep from screaming out the fire in the hearth shoots up the chimney, burning a bright blueish white for the eternity it feels for me to relax back against the sofa cushions.
The light goes out entirely once I open my eyes again.
I can barely make Elphaba out in the darkness. The moonlight doing very little to illuminate us. But I can see her eyes, dark as ever pouring into mine. A smile tugs at her lips.
"I love you but next time," She breathes nuzzling her nose against my cheek. My hands are still digging into her back and I relax my hold on her, sliding my hands up her warm skin and letting them rest around her neck. Elphaba sighs, content as I pull her to lie atop me. "How about we try this in a bed?"
"But I thought you loved libraries," I tease. Elphaba chuckles against me, her breath moving along my neck. I shiver below her at the tender sensation.
"Oh, I do. More than ever now, actually." She assures me. I can feel her smiling against my throat. "But I'd very much like to try a bed."
"Whose bed?" I ask playfully. It's a valid question though. We each have our own room. Though given the way things are going between us perhaps our own room in another house would be best.
"All beds." Elphaba leers.
"Elphie!" I gasp. "We're not doing it in my parents bed! That's just… just so eeww!" I wiggle beneath her at the thought.
Elphaba laughs and holds me tighter against her.
"I also refuse to do it on the lawn." I say. "Fiyero could see."
"I think the guy would happily die again to see us together like that."
"Ugh!" I swat at Elphaba's shoulder. "I don't ever want to think about him seeing us making love, ever."
"You brought him up first."
"And now I am unbringing him up."
"That's not even a word, my sweet."
"You love me anyway." I say melodically.
Elphaba laughs at my tone. "That I do."
"So to answer your question from before I say lets not worry about the when and where's." I shift a little so I can look at Elphaba. She folds her arms over my collarbone and rests her chin on them. She looks adorable lying on top of my like this. I've momentarily forgotten what I want to say. Oh! "I mean, I wasn't expecting our first time to be in the library and look at how wonderful this turned out."
"It felt a lot like conducting an experiment to me... A wonderfully satisfying experiment!" She adds on quickly after I give her a hurt look.
Though I do have to agree. It was for a while there sort of like an experiment. I smirk as a thought enters my head. "Well now we get to test out what we've learned."
"In a bed hopefully." Elphaba appends.
"I'm not making any promises." I grin. "We do have all eternity, you know."
"Forever with you in a bed sounds great."
"Why can't it be a bathtub full of oil?"
"Forever with you in a bathtub full of oil sounds great too."
I'm getting tired all of the sudden. I'd forgotten what it feels like when your eyelids start feeling heavy and you begin yawning.
"Let's get you up to bed," Elphaba whispers as my eyes fall close.
"No," I mumble. "Bathtub full of… (yawn)… oil."
"Maybe tomorrow," I feel Elphaba chuckling as she slips my nightdress back on. I slump against her as she scoops me into her arms. My head rests against her shoulder and I loosely hold on to the front of her nightdress. When did she put it back on? I really like when she's naked. She should always be naked.
I hear her whispering she loves me.
I whisper what I hope is an 'I love you too' back. Though judging by the way Elphaba's chest rises and falls in time with her laughter against me, I know I must have messed it up.
I fall asleep for the second time in her arms before we even make it upstairs.
And I dream for the first time in what has felt like forever.