My Oyster

I glanced at the calendar hanging on our wall and sighed, a strange mixture of emotions buzzing around in me. Had it really only been one of her years since she, literally, fell into my life? It seemed unreal to me. But then, a lot of things about her world seemed unreal to me, just as everything about my world was unreal to her. I rolled over and smiled, brushing a strand of hair off of her sleeping face. Alice, my Oyster, was truly the most beautiful creature I'd ever laid eyes on, in this world or Wonderland. She stirred and yawned, her blue-grey eyes opening slowly. She smiled sleepily and scooted closer to me, nuzzling her head under my chin.

"Morning, Hatter." She yawned again, sliding an arm around my back. Chuckling at her inability to call me by my "real" name (to her mother's knowledge), I rolled over onto my back, pulling her with me and onto my chest.

"Good morning, Alice," I began playing with her hair with one hand, tracing circles on her back with the other. "And how're you today?"

"How can you be so cheery so early…?" She groaned a little and tugged the blanket up around her in an attempt to cover her face. Alice, I had learned, was not a morning person.

"It's nearly noon, stubborn little Oyster," I ruffled her hair and felt her smirk against my skin, "I think it's time to get up."

I carefully (reluctantly) pulled her off of me and sat on the edge of the bed, yawning and scratching my head. Standing, I reached to the bedpost where my hat rested, casually flipping it onto my head. "Come on, it's a big day today."
I turned around to find her staring up at me with a mildly amused look, but then her expression turned to confusion. "It is?"

It was hard not to feel a little hurt by that; ok, really hurt. I sighed and stared at her, "You don't remember?" I gestured pitifully at the calendar, and she turned to look at it.

"Oh! Oh, oh my God, Hatter…" she fell back on the bed and covered her face with a pillow. "I remembered the day my dad disappeared without fail for ten years, but I can't remember our anniversary."

I shook my head, "Alice, don't beat yourself up about it, ok? I understand; bad history liking guys." I walked over to our closet and grabbed some clothes out. "I'm gonna go pay the Steam Beast a visit, when I get out," I stepped back to the bed and pulled the pillow away from her face. She sighed and looked at me, "I expect to see that smile of yours again, right?"

She smiled a little and I leaned down to kiss her, "Be back faster than a canary on fire."

Once I was out of our room, I turned and regarded the door before me with something akin to terror; Alice had to explain many things to me (something I like even less than breathing the air that Ratty was previously occupying), now that I lived in her world and one thing that I still wasn't too keen on was this "shower" business. The idea of being clean was one that I'd always enjoyed (if not always adhered to; being clean was a luxury afforded only to the Hearts, it seemed. But I got in a nice bath when I could), and because of that, it seemed to shock her that I had no idea what a "shower" was. I chuckled slightly, forcing myself to reach for the doorknob, remembering the day she explained it to me.

I was sitting on our couch, staring at the magic little box she called a "TV" while she tidied up. Her mother was coming over, this would be the first time she saw our apartment, and my Oyster wanted everything to be perfect. Suddenly, she plopped down next to me and pecked my cheek. "I'm gonna hop in the shower, think you can entertain yourself?"

I looked at her, almost asking what a shower was. Then I stopped myself; I'd asked so many questions already today, I didn't want to look like a complete dunce (or annoy her). So I merely nodded, and turned my head back to the magic box, where a bright yellow square creature was bothering a grayish one with tentacles. I was momentarily mesmerized by this, when I heard a loud roar come from the room Alice had just disappeared into. I leapt to my feet and ran to her rescue, almost tearing the door off its hinges in the process. I'll be damned if I let harm come to her again!

There was steam everywhere, and the room was ridiculously hot. Whatever monster was in here, it was certainly crafty. I raised my right fist, the only weapon I had, and screamed, "Alice! Don't worry, I'll—"

The roaring stopped, and a screeching sound pierced the steam. I finally found Alice, peering out at me from behind a curtain, sopping wet as the day we met. "Hatter! What're you doing?" She seemed to be somewhere between annoyed and amused, and I looked down, resisting the urge to fumble with my hat in my embarrassment; I'd accomplished both things I set out to avoid.

"I, erm… thought something was… it sounded like…."

"You have no idea what a shower is, do you?"

I sighed and heaved the door open, preparing myself to face the Steam Beast.

I made sure to be quick, anxious to get out of that thing as quick as I possibly could. Not to mention, I wanted to be with Alice, to make sure my Oyster was smiling again. I was slightly worried that she would let the fact that she forgot about today slip her mind get to her, and I didn't want that to happen. And if there was one thing I learned after all this time, it was that sometimes, no amount of jokes or hat tricks could cheer her up. I wasn't about to risk that happening today, of all days.

When I opened the door, the smell of sausage and eggs hit my nose, which alerted me to how hungry I was. Alice was standing by the stove, wearing that old, loud shirt of mine (my lucky shirt, in my opinion; I was wearing it the day I met her) and a pair of loose pants that she referred to as "PJ's."(I wasn't entirely sure who this "PJ" was, but I often wondered how she wound up with so many pairs of his pants. Past "boy she liked," I supposed.) I slid up behind her and wrapped my arms around her waist; it was something I had been very wary of doing for a while, having learned the hard way how jumpy she could be. But now she seemed much more relaxed about it, as she leaned back against me. "Feeling better?" I asked, leaning down to kiss her ear. She giggled a little.

"Just about, but I still can't believe I forgot—"

I reached around and put a finger against her lips, "None of that. We're happy today, right? And," I turned her around, keeping my hands on her hips, "we have plans later."

She cocked an eyebrow, shifting her face into one of my favorite expressions; amused curiosity. "We do? Really?"

I nodded, "Yep, we do. Tonight around seven," I leaned forward and planted a kiss on her forehead. "Until then, I have some things to take care of." I snatched my coat off of the rack by the door and looked at her. "Can you handle yourself till I get back?"

She laughed, putting her hands on her hips, "You sure you can 'handle yourself' out there, without me?" I grinned, putting my hand on the doorknob.

"I'm not the one who was almost always in need of rescuing, now am I?" Before she could answer, I slipped past the door and snickered to myself. Once I was far enough down the hall so she wouldn't hear, I pulled out the strange device she called a Cell Phone, and dialed one of the numbers. It rang a few times, and then a woman answered.


"Hi, Carol, it's Ha--David. I need your help."

"What is going on?" Alice asked with a slightly nervous chuckle, reaching up for her blindfold. I shook my head and took her hands.

"You'll see, just be patient. I know it's difficult for you," I smirked, knowing by the shape of her mouth that I was being glared at. "What, after everything, everything I've done for you, after deciding to finally trust me, you've changed your mind?"

"No," she exclaimed, and I resisted the urge to laugh. That one syllable, negative phrase was one of my favorites, even though it often meant I wouldn't get my way. It was such an Alice word. "I just don't like being blindfolded, and not knowing where I'm going or where I am and—"

I smiled a little, flipping the brim of my hat up and removing her blindfold. I could only tease her for so long, after all, and I wanted to see the look on her face when she realized what was going on.

"Hatter… you had me dress up to go to Pizza Hut?" She turned to face me, trying to appear frustrated; but I knew by the way her eyes were sparkling that a part of her was swooning.

"I'd hardly say you're dressed up… after all I consider that dress as casual wear for you." I smirked, placing my hands on my hips as I took in the beauty before me. "Besides, I only suggested you dress up. You're the one who pulled your blue dress out."

A light blush tinted her pale cheeks, and I took her hand as I led her into the restaurant and secured a table. "Do you not remember what I said to you the day you left Wonderland?"

I lowered my voice a bit after catching that warning look, then repeated my question. She looked down, playing with the sleeves of the coat I'd given her (alright, so maybe I made some suggestions on her wardrobe, down to specifics. Can anyone blame me?), then looked up, a bemused smile on her face as she realized what I meant.

"You said we'd get pizza."

I nodded, feeling the pocket of my jacket, just to make sure it was still there. A grin spread over my face as the saucy, cheesy delicacy was placed before us, and I noticed Alice watching me more than once. For some reason, she had a small obsession with me and food. Granted, next to Alice and tea, food was my truest love. But, like I said, it was trumped by Alice.

Dinner was long over, but we remained sitting and chatting away until we were not-so-politely asked to leave. I kept her hand in mine as we walked back to our apartment, closing my eyes for a brief moment and letting the astounding fact finally hit me.

I've just spent the happiest year of my life in this world, with this girl – no, woman.

"Hatter, hey, you alright?" I opened my eyes and smiled blissfully at her, sweeping her into my arms and spinning her around. She squealed a little from surprise before I set her back down.

"I couldn't be better," I whispered, keeping her body close to mine. Her face changed to one of shock and mild embarrassment.

"Hatter!" She exclaimed in the hushed tone she reserved for moments when I truly was being a fool, "learn a little self control?"

I was confused for a moment, then I remembered, and started laughing. She stared at me like I was as mad, no, madder than a box of frogs (on steroids, she would add in instances like this. I didn't know what steroids were, but I think I understood the general idea of it). "Alice, I've got complete control of myself. But you, my dear, need to get your mind out of the swamp muck."

"Then what just jabbed my stomach?" She asked, an eye brow arching up towards her slight widow's peak. I sighed, still smiling, and reached into my pocket, pulling out the long jewelry box. She gasped, her hands covering her mouth. "Ha…"

I stopped her, "Well, I figure," I slowly opened the box, and she looked up at me, obviously shocked. I slipped the delicate silver chain out of the box and shrugged a little, "every Oyster deserves a pearl, right?"

I was rather proud of myself for this one, finding such a pretty pearl necklace that seemed to suit her tastes. I'd expected a smile, a squeal of excitement. I wasn't expecting to see tears in her eyes, and panic hit me; jewelry was a bad idea, I really should've listened to Carol. "I know you seem to be opposed to rings, but I figured a necklace was safe, an—"

Her small, feminine fingers (that I knew for a fact could bring pain just as easily as pleasure) slid around my hand, removing the necklace from my grasp, and then her lips were on mine and her arms were around my neck. I was downright confused, I was worse off than the real bloody Mad Hatter. When she pulled back, she was smiling a little bit. I paused, then decided to just ask, "Umm. What was that?"

"That," she said pointedly, clasping the simple pendant around her neck, "was me kissing the man I love after he did what a certain King failed to do."

I think my heart took up tapdancing without telling me, because it was going at a fast and erratic rate, "Oh?"

We leaned our foreheads against each others, and I kissed the tip of her nose, "You, Hatter, have swept me off of my feet."

Unable to resist being a bit of a smart ass, I smirked, "They look like they're on the ground to me."

She playfully smacked my back, and we resumed our walk home.

"Next year, you're gonna get it."

"I'll believe it when I see it, my Oyster."


A/N;; Hello all! This was my attempt at a (rather long) Hatter/Alice oneshot. I'm hoping its not too terrible. I got the idea while watching Alice, when Dodo said that she was Hatter's Oyster. Just a bit of random fluff. X] Anywho, reviews are much appreciated! And if you want to throw sharp objects at me because I totally butchered these two adorable characters, feel free. I just had to get this out there. X]

Also, anyone else wonder why the eff Jack's hair changed color and style once he was in Wonderland? Haha.