Five Ways Hikaru Tried to Tell Kaoru 'I Love You'

Hee. I decided to do Honey's first. It makes more sense to do it in this order. Plus it's fun. :D

Chapter 2

Hikaru sighed as he sat down on a very fluffy armchair that seemed to have materialized out of nowhere.

"Ano ne, Hika-chan," began Honey, blinking innocently up at the redhead with a whole cake on a plate in front of him. "You look sad. What's wrong?"

Hikaru sighed again. "I'm... in love, Honey-sempai," he said. "But I don't know how to tell the person I'm in love with," he complained, sighing once more and resting his head on his hand.

Honey smiled knowingly. "It's Kao-chan, ne?"

Hikaru blinked, blushing slightly. "H-How'd you know?"

"I've been watching you, Hika-chan. You're going to need a lot to get Kao-chan to really understand what you mean," said Honey sagely. He then proceeded to ruin the mood completely by taking a huge forkful of cake and somehow managing to shove the whole thing into his mouth as well as swallowing it whole.

"Waiii," said Honey blissfully, his eyes closed in pleasure. "This is gooood! Ne, ne, Takashi! Try some, try some!"

Hikaru rubbed his chin thoughtfully as Mori dipped his head and allowed Honey to gently put a forkful of cake into his mouth.

"Is it good, Takashi?" he heard Honey ask Mori.

"Ah," said Mori.

Hmm, thought Hikaru. I never knew Mori-sempai liked cake. Hikaru smiled and thought off-handedly, Kaoru likes chocolate cake.


Hikaru normally never baked. It was more of Kaoru's style, though he himself could bake rather well. Maybe...

"Maybe I could use cake?"

Mori looked at him and blinked. "Ah?"

Honey seemed to realize what Hikaru was talking about and nodded happily. "Cake! Cake makes everyone happy! You should bake him some yummy cake!"

Hikaru grinned. "Thanks, Honey-sempai!" he called over his shoulder as he ran off.

"Oi, Hikaru!" called Tamaki after him. "Host Club's about to start–"

"No, let him go," said Kyouya. Tamaki blinked and turned to his best friend. "What? But with only one half of the brotherly love team, profits will go down, don't you think?!"

Kyouya smiled his devil smile. "The fangirls have been wanting Kaoru as a seme and Hikaru as the uke for ages, but Hikaru has always protested. With him out of the picture, we can start the idea and make him comply later on."

Tamaki sighed. "Well, if Kyouya says so..." he mumbled.

"Eh?" blinked Kaoru, who'd just come back after a potty break. "Where's Hikaru?" he asked, slightly panicked. Hikaru was like his other half. Without him close by at all times felt really, really weird. And also very scary. Like that time Hikaru went on a date with Haruhi –

Well, it was a dark, dark time for Kaoru. Let's not go there.

"Hika-chan went home," chirped Honey from his corner. "He had something special to do!"

Kaoru felt betrayed. Was this something so special that he couldn't even wait for his twin to get out of the goddamn bathroom before actually leaving?!

"Kaoru," said Mori, reading his mind easily. "Don't be hurt. Hikaru's mission has to do with you."

"Un!" chirped Honey, nodding enthusiastically. "I bet there will be something really special for you when you get home!"

Kaoru sighed, still uneasy but a little reassured. "I guess if sempai-tachi say so..." he mumbled, making his way over to his and Hikaru's usual spot.

"Kaoru," called Kyouya, his lips curling into his devilish smile. "Since Hikaru isn't here today, we'll be carrying out that idea the fangirls had..."

Haruhi, who'd just walked into the room, shivered. She had the feeling Kyouya-sempai was being even more evil than usual, and that was saying something. Resolving to stay far, far away from the Shadow King, Haruhi quickly made her way over to her sofa, hoping to finish up some homework before Tamaki realized she was there.

Plan #2: Bake him some yummy cake!

The Hitachiin Manor really wasn't that far from school, but if Kaoru had been there, he would've had the common sense to call up their limo driver to pick them up. Unfortunately, Kaoru took more than his fair share of common sense, leaving Hikaru with practically none. Thus, Hikaru actually ran all the way home.

Though, it wasn't as drastic as it would have been had Kaoru been with him. The twins were equal in speed, but Hikaru had way more stamina than Kaoru. They supposed there had to be some sort of compensation.

The moment Hikaru reached home, he kicked off his shoes (though he turned back to place them properly on the shoe rack after a moment of consideration – his mother was scary when she was mad, and she hated it when her sons (more like her son Hikaru, because Kaoru was a neat freak just like her; but, like they said, there had to be some kind of compensation: Hikaru had more of their mother's famed temper than Kaoru) chucked their things everywhere) and scowled briefly, remembering that he'd forgotten to take his school bag home with him. He figured that Kaoru would take it home with him, though, and went straight to the kitchen.

The chefs in the kitchen stared at him. Hikaru decided that the best course of action would be to pretend to be Kaoru. (Kaoru came in to get supplies for cooking sometimes. The twins had their own personal kitchenette, but sometimes supplies ran out and Kaoru was too excited to wait for anyone to restock, so he grabbed some supplies from the main kitchen.)

So, with a voice just a little higher than his usual, Hikaru said, "I'm just here for some flour." The chefs nodded and one brought over a tall jar of flour. "Here you are, Kaoru-sama. Cook well," said the chef. Hikaru smiled a pretty good imitation of Kaoru's gentle smiles and gave a little bow. "Thank you," he said, then he walked out. Kaoru was always polite, even to the staff. He didn't see why he had to be mean to the poor people who were forced to wait on them hand and foot.

Hikaru, on the other hand, couldn't care less either way.

In compensation –

Okay, I'll stop with that compensation thing.

In any case, Hikaru made his way up to their shared bedroom. He set the jar of flour on the counter, took off his jacket and tie and threw them onto the bed. Rolling his sleeves up, Hikaru grinned and pulled out a cookbook. "Let's get cooking."


Host Club


"Kaoru-kun? Where's Hikaru-kun?" asked the brunette girl sitting across from Kaoru worriedly. Kaoru smiled with a hint of worry in his expression (that wasn't completely fake) and shook his head with a slight blush. "He's just a bit sore, that's all. He didn't feel up to hosting."

The girls blinked. "Why would he be sore?" asked the brunette, slightly confused. Hikaru was the seme and Kaoru was the uke, so why...?

"Well, um... Usually I don't like to say this kind of thing, but, um..." he hesitated, his blush darkening profusely and he refused to look any of them in the eye. "Well, last night... was the first night Hikaru decided to let me," Kaoru's blush somehow managed to deepen, and he whispered out, "be the seme."

The girls squealed loudly.

Kyouya smiled evilly, satisfied with the reaction. "Good, good," he said to himself, writing something profusely in his notebook. "I expect interest in the twins to shoot up quite soon, so if I increase their designation price..."

Tamaki always found it totally awesome that Kyouya only ever talked to himself if only Tamaki was within hearing distance. If anyone else was near, he would remain quiet and mysterious.

"Ne, ne, Mommy," asked Tamaki, nudging Kyouya affectionately. "What do you think Hikaru's doing?"

"Not something stupid like the last idea he had," said Kyouya, automatically taking a jab at Tamaki's pride. Tamaki pouted and began to tear up. "Mommy's so mean!" he wailed.

Kyouya sighed. "Get back to your designators, Tamaki."

"I can't. They've all gone crowding around Kaoru," Tamaki pointed out.

"Ah, I see," said Kyouya, pushing up his glasses. "In response to your question, I believe that Hikaru is baking a cake for his twin," he added, catching a glance of the irresistible puppy eyes. Tamaki briefly rejoiced at the fact that he'd managed to wheedle information out of his mysterious best friend, then frowned. "A cake?"

"Did someone say cake?" asked Honey, suddenly appearing next to them.

"Ah! Honey-sempai, you scared me!" Tamaki cried, jumping. Then he blinked. "I feel déjà vu," he said.

"You did the exact same thing two days ago at 16:26:34-37 when Mori-sempai materialized right next to us," said Kyouya, consulting his notebook.

"Oh, right," said Tamaki cheerily, not at all bothered by the fact that Kyouya knew the precise time down to the seconds.

"Hikaru's making a cake for him, right, sempai-tachi?" Kyouya asked the two seniors. Both nodded.

"I think it's such a nice thing to do!" proclaimed Honey cutely, thoroughly convinced that cake could make its way into anyone's heart.

"And you, Mori-sempai?" asked Kyouya, still scribbling away in his notebook. "Do you think the plan will work?"

Mori regarded Kaoru for a long moment.

"Fifty-fifty. Depends," he said finally, turning back to Kyouya.

Kyouya nodded, as if he'd expected this answer. "Hmm, true."

"WHY IS HARUHI NOT COMING OVER?!?!" wailed Tamaki, tears pouring out of his eyes like a fountain. The other hosts blinked. It was true that Haruhi seemed to be keeping a fair distance from them. It was strange, considering she was usually very social with them.

"Do you think it has something to do with Hikaru?!" whispered Tamaki furiously, instantly protective over his 'daughter'.

"No," said Kyouya with a snort. "She appears to be afraid of me today. Hmm."

Over at her newly vacated loveseat, Haruhi wrote a note on an extremely bright yellow piece of paper to remind Kaoru to take Hikaru's bag home and taped it to Hikaru's bag, which she realized was extraordinarily light for all the subjects the students of Class 1-A were taking. She then wrote a note to herself to remind herself to reprimand Hikaru later on a sticky note and stuck it to her forearm before pulling her sleeve back down over it.

Haruhi sighed. It wasn't fun avoiding people, it really wasn't.


Oh well. At least now she had time to finish up her homework before going home.


Hitachiin Manor


Hikaru popped the mold full of cake batter into the oven triumphantly. Now all he had to do was wait with the icing...


Host Club


Host Club was almost over, and Kaoru was quite tired from having to entertain so many guests at the same time. Usually he had Hikaru with him, but today...

Well, today Hikaru was being a big jackass and had left his twin brother in the middle ofthe day withouteventakinghis school bag.

Damn that shithead.


Hitachiin Manor


Hikaru grinned gleefully as he heard the telltale 'ding' of the oven.

"Awesome," he said to himself as he pulled out the cake. "This is going to be so totally awesome."

He grabbed a jar of melted chocolate and chuckled to himself. "Kaoru's gonna love this."


Host Club


Kaoru sighed. Host Club was over for the day, but Kaoru just wasn't up to the usual post-club hanging out. Not without Hikaru.

Hikaru. That bastard. Damn that shithead, Hikaru.

"I'll just be going now," he mumbled darkly, his anger at Hikaru rising again. He remembered to take Hikaru's bag with him (thanks to a bright yellow note left by Haruhi) and bade the other hosts a dark goodbye before rushing out the front doors and into the cool, air-conditioned limo.

"Ah, Kaoru-sama, where's Hikaru-sama?" asked the driver, knowing that Kaoru always sat on the right. Imagine his surprise when Kaoru's mood darkened. "He's already gone home. I'm going to murder that bastard," growled Kaoru.

The driver thought it best to just shut up and drive.


Hitachiin Manor


Kaoru took off his shoes and placed them on the shoe rack next to Hikaru's, then stomped up the stairs to their room, all the while muttering curses under his breath.

"Hikaru," began Kaoru in a dangerous growl as he opened the door to their room, fully expecting his twin to be lying on the bed, playing video games. Then he blinked and paused as the smell of freshly baked banana cake assualted him. Who could've made the cake? ...Hikaru?!

"H-Hikaru..." mumbled Kaoru in amazement, going over to the kitchenette and smiling at the sight of Hikaru slowly icing a cake, his tongue sticking out in concentration. Even more comical than that was the fact that Hikaru was actually wearing a bright pink apron.

...Actually, that sight wasn't really that comical. In fact, it was kind of cute –

Too bad Hikaru would never allow himself to be dressed like that in public. The fangirls would go wild, especially now that they were doing a role reversal.

Deciding not to ruin Hikaru's hard work, Kaoru waited for Hikaru to finally finish before stomping over to him and saying loudly, "HI-KA-RUU!"

Hikaru yelped and jumped two feet in the air before turning to Kaoru in alarm.

"W-What?" he asked nervously.

Kaoru got right up in Hikaru's face. "You left me all alone at Host Club," snarled Kaoru viciously, glaring at Hikaru.

Hikaru smiled sheepishly. "I was baking. You know, for – "

Kaoru cut him off. "I know what it's for, Hikaru, but why the hell didn't you let me come and help you?"

Hikaru looked at him strangely. "...That would kind of defeat the purpose, wouldn't it?"

Kaoru frowned. "I know you wanted to do something for Mom by yourself, but you could've at least told me!" whined Kaoru, pouting cutely as he crossed his arms and glared at Hikaru.


"Mom's coming home soon, and you were anxious, I get it, but couldn't you have waited three minutes for me to get back from the goddamn toilet?!"


"Jesus, Hikaru! I can't believe your nerve!"

"Well, in all honesty..."

Hitachiin Yuzuha burst into the room with a bright grin and outstretched arms. "Hikaru! Kaoru! My little boys!" She gathered them both into a tight hug, nearly squeezing the life out of them.

"Mom!" the twins exclaimed, hugging back and similarly almost squeezing the life of their mother. "Happy birthday!" chirped Kaoru.

"Yeah, happy birthday," echoed Hikaru, inwardly cursing his timing. Why, oh why did he pick today of all days to bake a cake for Kaoru?

When they broke apart, Kaoru pointed at the cake. "Mom, look! Hikaru baked a chocolate cake for your birthday!"

Yuzuha gasped and stared at Hikaru in shock. "My, my, Hikaru! Are you sure your brother didn't help you?" she asked, ruffling his hair. "Well, gee, mom," said Hikaru sarcastically. "Thanks for the confidence in my abilities."

Yuzuha smiled. "Oh, I'm just teasing you, sweetie. I know you're just as good as your brother at baking."

Hikaru smiled weakly. "Yeah. Well, I'll just take this down to the kitchen..."

"I'll help you with that," said Kaoru quickly, taking the cake and smirking at Hikaru. "You might want to get out of that pink apron before the help sees you," he said with a mischievous grin, winking at Hikaru.

Yuzuha laughed as she watched her older son turn pink and scramble out of the pink apron like it was poisonous.

"You watch out, Kaoru!" Hikaru shouted after his laughing twin, his face still pink from embarrassment.

"You boys are so cute," said Yuzuha, ruffling Hikaru's hair again.

"Mom!" whined Hikaru. "It took me ages to get it that way!"

Yuzuha looked at her son knowingly. "You mean that you rolled out of bed, washed your hair and towel-dried it, don't you?"

Hikaru grinned. "Of course."

Yuzuha chuckled. "See you downstairs, Hikaru, dear."

Hikaru smiled until his mother left, and then he dropped onto the bed with a sigh.

Well, he thought wryly. At least I did something for mom's birthday...

Plan #2: Bake him some yummy cake! FAIL

Next up: Mori!

I quite like this one. Review, people! I've got to go to school now... T.T

DISCLAIMER: If Ouran were mine, twincest and Kyoutama would be real canon and Haruhi would be nothing more than a squealing fangirl.

CLAIMER: I own every spelling and grammatical error you find. You're all obliged to tell me if you find any mistakes. No exceptions. :D