As I sat by the bonfire out in the backyard, I was instantly reminded of my past. The good memories of my father and mother taking me to the more woodsy parts of New York and having bond fires just like these. Not the bad memories of Roy--.
Before I finished the thought Jasper spoke obviously sensing my sudden pain, "You know Rosalie, you can stop thinking about Royce now. You gave him what he deserved."
I sighed appreciating the effort though it wasn't helping, "I know, Jasper, but those memories of that night are forever burned inside of my memory. No matter how hard I try to get rid of them they're always there."
He looked at me, eyes full of compassion and understanding and said, "I know how you feel, Rosalie. More than you can understand."
I suddenly remembered his story. The story of a brave soldier whose life had been forever taken away and damaged by a woman named Maria. He didn't speak of her much; it was too painful. I bet those memories weren't ones that just went away either.
I hesitated before I spoke not wanting to cause him distress, "Jasper, how did you forget Maria? After all that she put you through?"
He sighed as his mood suddenly changed but quickly changed back, "I haven't forgotten her and I probably never will. I just don't spend my time thinking about her or that time because it's behind me. It's time for you to move on from that night too."
I looked at him. How did he always know just what to say to make me feel better? I suppose it has something to do with him being and empath. Stupid empath.
"How Jasper? How can I make the thoughts disappear?" I asked.
He chuckled, "You could start by thinking about something happier and making life easier for the empath."
I rolled my eyes. I understood the real meaning behind his words. I have to start filling my head with happier thoughts.
I laughed and then casually stated, "I suppose that could be arranged. No one wants a depressed empath."
He laughed, "Seriously though Rosalie, I don't want you to have to suffer anymore."
This took me aback for a minute. I never realized how much Jasper cared. Sure we were close. That's why we agreed to be called 'twins'. However, I never thought that he genuinely cared about how I felt.
I sighed, "Thanks, Jasper."
How could a man that's seen so much horror be so tender? He's seen and caused so much death in his lifetime and yet he continues to care for others more than himself.
Jasper looked up from his book and cocked his head, obviously sensing my sudden shift to uneasiness "Is everything okay, Rosalie?"
I sighed but nodded, "I have a question. . .but I'm afraid to ask."
He smiled and said, "You can ask me anything."
I nodded in understanding and said, "Do you ever regret joining our family?"
He laughed hysterically and I knew he was about to make a joke.
He collected himself and then said, "Of course not, then I would never have met you and what kind of life would that be."
I glared at him, "Seriously, Jasper."
The corner of his mouth lifted into a half smile, "Yes, sometimes, only because I regret bringing my weakness to the family."
I laughed, "Yeah but then you think 'Gee if I leave I'll never get to see that Rosalie girl again' and you decide you can't."
He chuckled, "Yeah that's it."
I missed this. Just Jasper and I alone, it was nice.