A/N: What happens when Light denies Ryuk an apple? This, apparently.
Warning: Lots of OOC in this. Cursing. Character deaths. Also, this story is Au-ish, or alternate universe-ish, for those who don't know. That basically means things happen along the original plotline but there are many tweaks. I.e.: Most characters are in this story, including Teru, who comes in at the end. Oh and the story begins in Light's room soon after the cameras were taken out. Um, yeah. Let's pretend that makes sense, okay?
Disclaimer: I... *Breathes* I... *Shuts eyes* 'I can do this...' Idon'townDeathNote! *Sobs and clutches L plushie*


Third Person POV

"Light?"

"What, Ryuk?" Light asked. He was at his desk studying for a big test and needed to concentrate, which, of course, called for silence.

"I want an apple!" Ryuk whined, laying on Light's bed. Light sighed. 'This shinigami could be so annoying!'

"Not now, Ryuk. I'm studying. Besides, Mum didn't buy any." Light said, turning toward Ryuk in his chair with wheels. As he spun, he went a little to far. He pushed back against his desk, forcing him the other way. He pushed against the desk again, spinning in a complete circle this time.

"Heh, this is kinda fun."

Ryuk just sat there, glaring at the teen. Here he was, starving, and his 'human pet' wouldn't get him a single apple! After he gave him the death note!

Light continued spinning in his chair, giggling like a little school girl, when Sayu came in his room.

"Light! Can you help me with my homework?" She looked up to see her older brother spinning in a chair, exclaiming, "Wee!"

"Sayu! Come here! You have to try this!" he said, bringing Sayu to the desk and sitting her down on the chair. He gave the chair a good spin, sending her in circles.

"Hey, this is fun!" She threw her arms up, laughing.

Ryuk stared at them. 'Humans are so interesting... And odd. Very odd.'

If only L could see them now, Light spinning his little sister on a chair. This was sure proof that Light was Kira and L could finally bring him to justice. Unfortunately, he took out the cameras. Guess L will catch them in the next chapter...

"Light! I want some apples!" Ryuk said in a whining tone.

Light, completely forgetting Sayu couldn't hear Ryuk, answered, "Not now! I'm spinning with my little sister!"

Sayu was too dizzy to notice that her brother just spoke to himself. Ryuk groaned, leaving the room through the window, flying of course. 'Fine! You don't want to give me apples? Well, let's see what happens!' Ryuk thought, sitting on the roof of the house.

He pulled out his special notebook, flipping to a random page. He began to write Light's name with a bunch of details. 'This will be enough entertainment for now, seeing as he'll die after this.' As soon as he finished, he went back in Light's room. Sayu left, Light spinning alone in his room.

"Here's an apple, Ryuk." said the dizzy teen. He threw it towards the wall.

Ryuk dived after the apple, eating it quickly. 'Ah. So juicy! Uh-oh. Light's going to be pretty pissed when I show him his name in my notebook.' He began to laugh cruely "Hyuk, hyuk, hyuk."

"What's so funny?" asked Light, still spinning. The creepy-looking creature took out his notebook, showing Light his name. Light stopped midspin.

"What did you do!" he screamed, not caring if anyone heard him.

"You wouldn't give me an apple!"

Light grabbed the book, reading what was written after his name, though not all of it. He didn't have enough time before Ryuk grabbed the book back. The teen's eyes widened.

"Sorry, Light. You should have gave me that apple earlier." And so, forty seconds passed. Ryuk began to follow him, completely amused just by imagining what was about to happen.

Light began walking down the street to the hotel L was at. Once reaching the suite, he knocked on the door.

"Light? Oh, come in," Watari said, caught of guard by Light's sudden appearance. Light strolled in, spotting L on the couch. The rest of the task force was present as well.

Light ran up to L, kneeling in front of the chair he was perched on. He hugged L, who was completely shocked. Light began to sob into L's chest.

"I am so sorry! I'm sorry, L! I'm just so sorry!" Light kept repeating, getting confused looks from the people around him. Not that he could see them. His head was buried in L's chest.

"For what, Light-kun?" asked the detective. For once, L was actually confused as to what was happening.

"I ate the last cake!" Light yelled. L's eyes then grew ten times in size. He made the cutest puppy-dog face in the world, tilting his head slightly.

"The cake is a lie?" he asked in the most adorable voice in the world, his eyes shining.

Watari walked in, looking down. "I am sorry, L. I have failed you. We ran out of cake. I was just going to get some when Light came in."

Aizawa stood up, angry as usual. He grabbed the closest thing to him and threw it at Watari, except he missed. His afro got in front of his eyes and blocked his aim.

"How dare you not have cake!" At that moment, he realized he didn't throw a thing.

He threw Mogi.

Mogi stood up, holding his back. The thrown task force member just glared at the window. "That window is open and I am cold. Evil window," he mumbled, obviously not caring that he was just thrown.

Just then, Misa came in through the door. She had a CD player with her, which she turned on. She put it down and then both her and Matsuda started to dance the 'Caramelldansen Dance.'

Mr. Yagami got a nosebleed. From Matsuda. He dashed into the bathroom, sticking tampons in his nose. He didn't bother to ask why L had them in the first place.

L was sobbing into Light's shoulder, mourning for his cake when all of a sudden, Light stood up and walked over to Ide. He pulled his arm back and bitch-slapped him.

"What the Hell was that for!" Ide screamed, clutching his cheek.

"You cheated on me with Misa!" Light yelled. Ide blushed. He thought he hid the fact that he liked Light pretty damn well. Apparently not, Ide. Apparently not.

Misa, enraged, walked over to Light.

"What is that supposed to mean! Are you implying that Misa likes Ide?" she screeched.

"Yes I am, you slut!" Light said in the most girly voice you could imagine.

Ukita walked up to Light and Misa, looking mad. "Misa is not a slut, Light! She is not a damn slu-" He fell over laughing. "I'm sorry, Misa. It was just too big of a lie for me to be so serious. Haha haha ha!"

Misa grabbed a lit candle and held it in front of her.

"Ha! I have a weapon! Fire! Now take back what you said, Light!" She screamed, holding the glade scented candle to Light's face. He looked terrified upon the object in front of him. That candle could burn his beautiful face! (A/N: Psh. Light can't pull that off, only Mello can.)

The window Mogi now throwing shoes at let it a gust of air, blowing out Misa's 'weapon,' as she called it; she broke down crying.

Smiling in relief, Light strode out of the room, swinging his hips back and forth. Stopping in the doorway, he turned around and observed the hotel room.

L was mourning for his cake. Watari was acting like a child waiting to be yelled at. Mogi switched to throwing water bottles at the window. Soichiro just walked out of the bathroom with tampons up his nose. He then joined Matsuda dancing.

Too bad they weren't any good.

Ide was stunned on the couch, still holding his cheek and possibly fantsizing about Light. Aizawa was singing the song 'Like a Virgin' by Madonna, swaying back and forth. Ukita was laughing on the floor. Misa was crying, clutching her dear candle. Ryuk was laughing. Everything seemed normal.

...

For the most part, anyway.


A/N: How'd ya like it? Let me know in a review, please! I want to know if I did good! ^-^
Little Bit of Info: Soichiro is Mr. Yagami. Sorry if it's confusing.
Review if you thought this was funny or you hated it or you want to yell and flame me or if you want more or it you have any ideas I can use or your just going to yell at me to hurry up and update. In other words, no matter what, review! Please? Reviews to me are strawberries to L. You wouldn't want to see L all sad because he has no strawberries, would you?