AN: Okay new fic! Yay! This story if finished with proper chapters and everything. I am a slow writer as well, which is why this took forever. But I had a reason to do this. A while ago, okay so a little over two weeks ago it was the Tribble Master's birthday. I wrote her an E/O Challenge but I thought it would be fun to do this as well. These were her terms:
I would love a story that has drunk!Castiel and/or hurt!Dean. If you can make obscure literary references, or pop culture references, all the better. I'm leaving it kind of open ended for mayhem and mischief because I don't really know what I want. On a side note: My beliefs are: Magic always goes wrong. Dean is a cute kitten. Bobby is God. Sam is geeky. Body switches are good. And the word Kerfuffle is awesome. That is all.
Accepting this I took her challenge and began writing. My muse, (go to me homepage, it's the lemon...it's name is Bob) left me for a while...made me late. Eventually it came back with the rest of the story - didn't give me a title though...and so we begin...
Dean shouldn't have left Castiel alone with that girl...
Dean shouldn't have gotten Castiel drunk so that he'd go with the girl...
Dean shouldn't have let the angel try to fix his own nose...
In retrospect, Dean shouldn't have done a lot of things. But, of course, in true Dean Winchester style, he did them all and everyone around him had to pay a price.
"You really think this is a good idea?" Sam asked as he looked to the angel and then back at Dean.
Dean looked at Sam solemnly. "I haven't gotten him laid yet Sam, he was close but still! It would be great to get him laid, might get rid of the stick up his ass."
Scoffing, the younger Winchester walked over to the angel and regarded him carefully. "It would be sinful...and the fact that he's an angel makes it a hell of a lot worse."
Together, the trio stood in the motel room with Castiel still watching the brothers intently as they argued about him. It wasn't like he was going to get drunk, he had handled his first beer pretty well although all those skimpily dressed women had scared the wits out of him. He didn't understand why Dean was so intent on bringing one of them to bed. He could have found himself a nice woman but no, semi naked people were Dean's way of life.
"You know what? Cas, do you want to go?" asked Sam carefully. Everything in his brown eyes pleaded for him to say no. There was finally good in the world and he didn't want his big brother to corrupt it, just for the sake of losing one's virginity whether it be angel or human.
Dean sat on the bed and watched his brother. "Cas, don't worry 'bout it. Mom's only gonna get grumpier if you say yes."
Castiel smiled and suppressed a snort of laughter, looking up at Sam who had his lips pursed.
"Fine, go, go get STD's and get drunk and crap. See if I care." Sam motioned to the door with a snarl on his face. "Just don't expect me to bail you out if you get into trouble."
"Awesome!" Dean cheered and grabbed Castiel's sleeve. He pushed the angel out the door and smirked. "Bye, Mom!" he called out cheerily closing the door. A muffled sound of a pillow hitting the door could be heard from the outside of the motel room.
Once at the club Dean had ordered a couple of beers. "Just sit back and relax man."
This was easier said than done as Castiel averted his eyes from everything and everyone in the club. Maybe I should have listened to Sam, he's destined to be the antichrist but at least he has decency.
Finally the beer was delivered by a beautiful blonde haired lady. 'Wow,' Dean mouthed as she flashed him a smile and wiggled her ass in his face. "Ah, excuse me miss?"
"The name's Candy and yes, sugar?" she queried seductively.
Castiel groaned and rolled his eyes. Obviously it was going to be an unintelligent name. Who names themselves after confectionary?'
"Think you can hook my friend up?" Castiel's eyes went wide and he furiously shook his head. "He's shy but still he could learn to loosen up." Again Dean smiled and surveyed the other women in the room. "This is the coolest place ever."
"What can I say? We aim to please," Candy explained and then turned to Castiel. She whispered something in his ear, pulled the beer glass closer to him and walked away.
"I'm going to smite you!" he whimpered. "Dean, I do not," he paused to take a drink, "wish to be here." Castiel looked around the room and then back to Dean with panic growing in his eyes. "I shall drink once more and then after this, no more clubs." He fiddled with his hands and continued to look up and then avert his gaze whenever a woman approached. Truth be told, his neck was getting sore.
"Fine." Annoyed, Dean motioned to the nearest waitress and ordered another couple of drinks, lowering his voice as he asked for one of the strongest drinks possible. One that would knock the socks off anyone who believed they could hold their liquor.
She simply smiled, batted her eyelashes and sauntered off.
AN: There we go. So I guess this is set after S5ep3 but it might be a bit further down the track because I may have referenced it for later...oh well, hope you enjoyed this...plenty more to come with this and yes, remember if you think of a good title let me know! It shall be welcomed with open arms! Tribble Master, I know you are away at the moment...but maybe you'll find it maybe you won't, Bob wants to play hide 'n seek with you so goodluck! Love Scare4irony