The light looks far it looks dangerous being in the dark where I belong where I hide the darkness is all I've ever known but I'll walk into my fear and hope that the good in it doesn't disappear
Pain one of the many the many things that rule my life. It's like a dagger so sharp and clever but for me its not killing me quickly but slicing me slowly letting blood seep past my skin like red satin but killing slowly and deeply with every slash .
The pain I experience is minor compared to all the big problems in the world but in order to fix those problems we need to fix the small ones so they don't become big.
My pain well it started along time ago. I was young a child seeing her father beat and cheat on her mother, then see the ongoing war of hate continue to the point it feels like no end, to the point that I've begun to think that love doesn't exist anymore that men only hate or feel lust in a relationship that a woman has to anything to keep the man she "loves" ,but my belief is that love is only a myth and you only read it I fairy tales in books .
Darkness again every night for the last 7 years, a different death every night. It's 5 am I get up not able to go back to sleep and brush my teeth looking into the mirror after a long hot bath my short black hair (about shoulder length) and chocolate brown eyes, and well built body but its nothing like the fakes at school with boob jobs and nose jobs and other jobs my friend Renee and I were all natural. It was seven by the time I was done getting dressed.
As I was descending down the stairs, I felt a cold hand grasp my arm and abruptly stopped and shivered. Right then and there I ran down the stairs towards the kitchen. As soon as I opened the refrigerator door I realized my mother had left early with a note on the fridge:
Sorry honeys for leaving early again but work called and they needed me come and fill in John and Jon sorry again
Then the door bell range and Renee well just let herself in. As she did the boys came running down.
"Sam where's breakfast?" JJ said loudly
"It's in the kitchen on the table."I said annoyed
In the next minute the boys were out and running to catch their bus.
"So what's up, and why do you look so tired?"
"Because I woke at 5 am again."
"Death Dream again?"
"Yup" I said dumbly
"WOW what happened to your arm"
"Ummm….. Nothing... Why?"
"Well because you've got a HUGE bruise on your arm"
"Well I was coming down the stairs and something cold like a hand grabbed me"
"Wait you mean to tell me that you think a ghost grabbed you and gave you a bruise!"
Before I could answer the bus came .THANK GOD! As we entered the bus I headed to the back Renee following me ,but then she was stopped by the person in front of me when I looked at who it was no surprise that it was her boyfriend, James. She looked at with wide eyes, "Just sit with him'' I mouthed she smiled 5minutes later they were in conversation about the male and female independence. That was fun to listen to.
"Hello Saaaammm is this seat taken?" Jake smiled when he got my attention.
"Hey Jake" I smiled tiredly
"So how was your weekend?"
By the time school had finished I was exhausted and very much tired. Took the bus home to tire to go the mechanics to get my car. When I got home plopped on my bed a took a nap as was sleeping I had another dream : She was young and pretty maybe a cheerleader from the form of her body but still she looked drugged and tired all her strength was being used to stay awake then a man came in the room with other hooded figures standing around her . The one person without a hood had a tattoo .It looked like a dagger and on it were some words I really couldn't see. Then the man without a hood walked stood above her leaned down a kissed her, she was reluctant. When stood up he brought a dagger over head stabbed her in the chest and then ---
"Sam honey get up Renee is here."
I walked down the stairs as I walked Renee looked at me worriedly. "What's wrong Renee?" I asked tiredly
"We should go meet Jake like I promised. Let's get going."
As I got into the car wondering what could be so important that Renee couldn't call me. We drove by McDonald and Pizza Hut which is our usual meeting place. "Renee where are we, what is so important that you couldn't call me, I'm tired and been having dreams 'Kay. I'm so exhausted right now couldn't y-"
"Sam what I'm dragging you out for is important and we're not going to see Jake that was just to get you out of the house as an excuse 'Kay ?"
"But why are you dragging me out?"
"Remember when you had that dream of a dead chick?"
"Yah but what does that have to do with me?"
"Well what was your other dream 'bout?"
"Well that girl I we know her from one our games where we schooled those sexist idiots on the football team a few years back."
"Yah and what does that have to do with your dreams." "Well remember that cheerleader"
"Yah you mean the one that kissed Jake then Mike as a treaty, yah she was a real whore."
"Yah well she was just killed someone is going to find her dead sadly "
"Sam remembers when I told you my dad's job?"
"Yah well duh your dad works for the FBI, why are going we going there."
"Because my dad needs your help the FBI think the murders that are going on right now have something to do with you"
"Renee what are you saying."
"I'm saying that your in danger and my dad wants you to look for the assholes who are trying to kill other girls and put them in ditches and don't worry no one knows your secret."
"Thanks Renee for reassuring me my secret is safe with you."
"Anytime" she smiled
As we drove towards the building we were stopped by a guard, but all Renee had to say was her name and the we were let through the gates. We got out and met her dad inside.
"Good evening Mr. Martinez."
"Hello Ms. Jackson "
"I hear my sorry life is endangered "
"Sam ever since you did that suicide jump, there have been young girls dying or murdered by these sick men who have been watching your every move."
"So how come these guys haven't made their move yet?"
As we walked into the next room I saw a map with bunch red marks. "Take a closer look Ms. Jackson you might see the marks and understand them." Mr. Martinez said
When I looked at them a swarm of emotion came. I felt hate and like doing suicide all over again. "Sam tells us what it means you know what it is." Renee said
"Those marks I know them but my farther is in jail so he can't cause this commotion unless-" I broke off
"Unless what Sam" Renee pushed
"Unless they have a new generation which looks like from the way they dump the bodies they are."
"What does have to-?"
"The new generation is always worse than the generation before them. The marks on this map mean we are watching you."
"So this message was meant for you to read?"
"Yeah it was" I sighed
"What! How do we know if it's for you?"
"I know because they put my sign at the end of this warning .Smart guys smarter than my dad's crew." I shuddered
After that Renee drove me home and stayed the night which bothered me. That night I had another dream: it was new girl couldn't really see her face she was screaming so much pain and blood. Blood never bothered me but in this case it was reeking of dead corpses
"Sam what is it?"
"Another death dream "
Renee looked at my arm then said "Wasn't that the arm that had a bruise."
"Look in the mirror "
When is stood up and looked in the mirror I saw the mark of me the first child, the star. When I looked up Renee knew the mark.
Why me, why now my father isn't here, so why am I seeing the marks now.
"Looks like its time to visit daddy "Renee said under her breath
By the time I was going to protest Renee was on the phone with her dad, and ten minuets later we were driving her car.
"Why are you doing this to me Renee?" I said quietly.
"I'm doing this to you because you need answers and the FBI needs knowledge, plus if someone is looking for you we need to protect you. I can't lose my best friend."
When we arrived at the jail the guards took me into the private room, but even though it is private the FBI cam hear every word that passes between my father and I.
It was weird seeing my father for the first time after seven years of abuse.
He smiled that smile; he knows why I'm here .I guess that should save me from the explanation.
"Hey sweetheart how is your mother and brothers? It's nice of you to-"
"Look I'm not here to visit and you know it."
"Well you're certainly like your mother when it comes to getting to the point. Well let's get right into it, well the new generation out now that the last of us are in jail."
"Yup, but why did they put my sign at the end of their um greeting. "Oh wow they caught on fast."He smiled sickly
"Caught onto what fast?"
"Killing you" he answered wickedly
"You sick twisted bastard you would have the murder your own flesh AND blood!"
"Well technically they have to hand you over to their leader then he would choose to make you his slave for pleasures, which bye the way you wouldn't have a problem with, or he would kill you for his blood lust, But personally I prefer the torture, you know the screaming to spare them then you cut them and blood comes and its just wonderful."
Right there I stood up a punched the asshole, and after that he had a bloody nose. Renee ran into the room walking into the conversation.
"Let's go Sam."
"HES A SICK TWISTED MAN I WANT HIM DEAD NOW I WANT TO SUFFER IN HELL." I screamed I continued to till I was out of the prison
"That was disgusting Sam now I know why you hate his guts."
While she was talking I broke down and began to cry.
The next day I went to school even though Renee advised me not. I took the school bus to school. Renee came along worried I'd do something stupid .In the next isle was Renee's boyfriend was waiting.
"Renee you want to sit with me?"
"Um James I think I'm goanna sit with-"
"Renee sits with him."
Then Jake came in. "Hey Sam is okay if I sit with you."
"Hey why do you look like you were crying."
"I went see my dad"
"Why would you go there?"
When it came to Jake and my dad that was sensitive subject. Jake was there when things got really bad between me and my dad. Ever since that happened Jake has been nothing but there for everything even the small stuff.
"Sam why would you go to see your dad?"He asked quietly. I took deep breath thinking of a lie.
"Jake I went to see my dad because I needed to know something it is time for closure to forgive and forget." I said calmly it really wasn't a lie
"What did he say to you that makes look like you've been crying?"
"Sam you suck at lying, tell me what did he say to you."
"He said I should be dead, that I should have jumped when I had the chance"
"Look it will never be your fault he did a lot to you."
"I f I told you people were dying because of me would you believe that this issue is my fault?"
"Nope even then I would believe you."
The school day was pretty good 'til lunch came around.
"OH looky its Sammy girls the one girl that doesn't have a daddy" Alexis J. Walker one of the most stuck up two-faced bitches in the school though she always ends up being the good girl and turning me into the bad girl .
"Hey if you're looking for a new guy to go sleep with it if so go check central lot of whores there"
Next thing you know Renee is dragging me off Alexis and telling me to get off.
"Look Sam you can't beat up Alexis even if she deserves."
"Come on lets go you need to go talk to a physic"
"Wow no way am I going to talk to some freak who thinks they can tell people futures."
"Well I'm not giving you a choice."
As Renee drove me to the physic I felt something fishy is going on a girl was walking out of a movie rental with a guy sluggishly following after with a hoodie on but it was bright and not cloud in the sky and something in my gut told me to make this appointment quick .
"Well here we are." Renee said happily
When we walked into the shop it was empty.
"Well that was a waste of gas, guess we'll have to go home."
As I was getting ready turn and leave a voice a called out to me
"Sam your very powerful you have a destiny you wish not fulfill."
I stopped on my trail Renee looking right at some creepy lady with bad hair was looking right at me.
"Look lady we made a wrong turn I think you've got the wrong Sam" I said in a low voice
"No I have the right Sam. Sit down and let me explain to just how powerful you are, you're in the prime of your time."
" What do you mean in the "prime" of my time I'm only just beginning my life."
"Or you could just be reliving your life in a different time, different name and place ."
"Whatever old lady you could be making up stories ."
"If I was making up stories would I be wrong about the dreams of death how many girls have gone missing and how your father is apart of a secret society."
"How in the hell did you get that information same way I saw you coming here today ."
"Do you expect me to sit down and let physic read what kind of powers I have over"
"Look if you won't, let me explain let me tell you this you will begin to see ghosts very soon and the mark on your arm is a sign for your power"
Yeah right Renee we need to go .
"Kay Sam "
"well if you won't stay listen to this follow your gut thought always"
"Well all powerful one lets go eat with Jake and James"
"Um I gonna walk around I'll meet at McDees"
When Renee was surely out of sight I went to go look for that weird guy in the hoodie .
My gut was telling me to watch this freak very closely . The world is a cruel and i am a product of cruel realaity . Thats no surprise .