AN: I'm alive! I neglected writing to spend time with the boy before he left for K State this summer. So, now that he's gone I thought I'd throw something together. It's silly, just to get me back into the swing of things, and I hope it's at least a little entertaining. The end is amusing.
1. Can raise one eyebrow and leave other down
2. Tutors elementary children
3. Has gorgeous soccer body
4. Smells wonderful
5. Hugs really tight
6. Dislikes ice-cream
7. Pays in exact change
8. Endearing fascination with birds.
9. Can touch tongue to nose
10. Hygienic to point of girliness
11. Loves chick flicks
12. Hates football
14. Insufferably upbeat
15. Makes really terrible baked goods. Really terrible.
16. ... Quirky?
Nita wiped beads of sweat from her forehead in the summer heat, grabbed her lemonade, and threw her pen down in frustration. She wondered when it was that simply being him had become a Pro. When it was that his Cons had faded away to become a perfect flaw in his too big personality.
17. Oversized personality
Swear words in at least eighteen languages filled her thoughts. She checked her watch. 2:27. Nita had been sitting on her front steps attempting to produce a Con for an hour and thirteen minutes. This was dangerous.
She'd taken a break earlier from her struggle with the Pro/Con list, thinking that a hiatus may allow her mind to clear sufficiently to present her with a Con. She attempted to pen a list of characteristics that she would like in a man and assumed that the lists would negate each other, her fears would be entirely unfounded, and she would continue on with her life. Only she'd gotten super pissed and crumpled the Perfect Man list and thrown it when she realized that it was nearly identical to the Pro/Con list.
18. Level headed
"Goddamnit," Nita groaned. She dropped the notepad on the step and placed her lemonade on it, not caring, and kind of hoping, that the ink would run. She wondered when this had begun. She wondered when it began to make her sweat when he took her hand as they walked. Swung their connected arms back and forth to the cadence of their strides, a metronome to their lives.
Nita moved the lemonade and pondered how much easier her life would be if she was a lesbian.
20. Is definitely a male
She stretched out and lay across the porch. There was something about him that drove her wild; something that she hadn't seen or recognized behind his big personality at first. It had appeared gradually, or worked itself to the surface, or developed, festered or something. That innate good humor that seemed to radiate from him, define him, affect his every thought, action, and move. It infected her and it permeated her and left her soul dazed and smiling at his every grin. She wondered when his happiness began to infuse her with the same spirits.
Nita had been fine being just friends with him last week and had none of these irritating, useless really, feelings for him. It was after several hours of careful deliberation during last night's sudden bout of insomnia that she had pinpointed this ridiculousness as beginning last Tuesday, at 2:43 in the morning.
She had stayed the night at his tiny apartment because of a water-main break in her neighborhood. He had blankets set up on the couch for himself, offered her the bed, and they had gone off to their respective slumbers in a blissful state of normalcy.
21. A natural gentleman
Then, she realized after excessive scrutiny and zillions of mental replays, was when it happened. She had rolled onto her stomach while trying to make herself comfortable in a bed much larger than the one she was accustomed to, and had ended up with her nose in his pillow. It was amazing how such a small move in an empty bed could have created such damage to her stable and logical mental state.
It smelled fabulous.
22. Has fabulous smelling pillows.
But in a manly way.
Kit had always been in touch with his feminine side. He loved to shop, he read extensively, loved romantic movies with a happy ending, and worked out religiously to keep all of the sweets he ate from going to his thighs. He owned a flowered apron, a teddy bear, and wore house-shoes. He had curtains on his windows and vacuumed regularly. It had not been hard for Nita to simply never think of him as a guy for the entire duration of their ten year friendship.
But his pillow smelled like a guy.
She liked guys.
And after laying in his bed and smelling his pillow like some creepy thirteen year old she decided to stop the nonsense, get up, and remove herself from the situation.
23. Makes coffee half naked at obscene hours of the night
She was woefully unprepared for what affronted her as she stood in the door way to the kitchen. He hated swimming (being too uncoordinated get very far) and always slept in a t shirt and pajama pants. She had never seen him shirtless before. Then he turned around to greet her.
Wow. He had fabulous abs. Fabulous! And coffee. Two things that Nita had never been able to resist. Not once. Ever.
The asshole grinned too. Because he knew that.
And now that she knew that he was a male, a fabulous looking one, she was completely unable to get him out of her head. Her heart fluttered when she breathed and she felt a dopy grin smeared all over her face.
It was all rather nauseating actually, and she didn't like it at all. Their friendship had been tried and tested so many times that if there was one trait bad enough to turn her off to him she would have found it and given him the boot years ago. The situation was looking grimmer by the second and Nita could think of nothing else to do but swallow her pride and move on to Plan B. Because nobody is perfect, especially that arrogant ass-hat, and she was going to have a Con list if it killed her.
Nita moved her lemonade, wiped the sweat from her brow, and picked up her cell phone. She hit the familiar speed dial button and listened to the ring tone.
Goddamnit. She felt her rebellious lips curve into their dopy smile once more as she heard his light Spanish tones across the phone.
24. Has sexy accent.
She laughed as she heard a pan clang to the ground. "Jeez! Shout much?" then his voice softened again. Affectionate, amused, and easy. "Whatcha need?"
Nita laughed and supported the phone with her ear as she grabbed her list once more. "I need a big favor."
"Really?" She heard the unmistakable lilt in his voice and couldn't help but laugh a bit.
"Not that kind of favor."
"Are you sure?"
He laughed. "Okay. What do you really need? I can be there in about four and a half minutes."
"I need you to list off every undesirable quality you possess."
She heard him settling into a chair. She grinned and poised her pen for action.
"Well, I hug too tight."
Nita began to write but then ceased after a glance at her paper. Number 5.
"Um…already have that one." A nervous giggle.
Kit laughed again on the other line and she heard a crunch as he bit into a sandwich.
"Let's see…I always pay in exact change. That irritates everyone behind me at the grocery store." More crunching. Contemplative this time. "Which could be kinda dangerous if they have a lot of canned goods to throw."
Nita took a deep, shaky breath and sighed. Number seven. It was okay though, because no one knew his faults better than Kit. For being so full of himself, he had always had a surprisingly realistic vision of himself.
"I'm happy. Like, all the time. That can be irritating."
Nita shook her head. Untrue. She had seen him crushed only once and it was one of the scariest moments she could ever recall. The next day he appeared to be fine, if a little overwhelmed. He laughed and mussed his hair and asked if she needed anything. She didn't. They went for ice-cream; hers chocolate cookie dough, his a lime sherbet. He stole half of hers when she left for the bathroom. Asshole.
"I can't cook. Like, at all. Macaroni from a box is a big deal for me."
26. Adorably inept.
She hung up on him and had a small panic attack: screaming, stomping, throwing. More like a temper tantrum actually. Then she took a deep breath, stuck the folded list in her back pocket, and removed herself from the situation. She made sure to sit as much as possible all night, enjoying the feeling of her butt smushing all of her unwanted thoughts into oblivion.
He called at two forty seven in the morning. She didn't answer the first six times, but by the seventh she started to feel like he may have something worth listening to. On the last ring she fumbled around, found the phone, and hit talk.
"Nita? Thank God."
She sat up in bed.
"Kit? Are you okay?"
She heard him sit down. He didn't sound right at all. They'd had too many late night conversations over the years for her not to notice. It wasn't his sad voice, or happy. It wasn't his ha I just pissed you off tone either.
She felt her rage beginning to build.
"What do you need!? It's fucking three o'clock in the morning!"
His voice had an angry edge to it as well. Something was seriously wrong. "I need help, okay? I just need some help."
Nita softened a bit. She was standing in his kitchen twelve seconds later.
Nita peeked around the corner and saw him laying spread eagle in the living room floor. Coffee maker parts surrounded him and the television advertised a Meg Ryan film marathon. Kit looked depressed.
"Kit, what's wrong? This is your Christmas!" The annual marathon was always marked on the calendar months ahead of time.
He sat up, bottom lip sticking out farther than it probably should. "But I don't want to watch it alone."
"You always do, though. It's the Woody Allen marathon next week that you wanted company for."
He shook his head and batted at a piece of coffee pot. He pointed. "I broke it."
"I see that. Is that why you want me? You need coffee to make it through?"
"No, I just wanted you here."
He looked a bit shy, a little confused too, and it disturbed her. This was completely new territory for her. It was adorable.
27. Entirely honest.
She brushed aside some debris and lay down. He smiled and dug his head into her stomach. She fixed the piece of hair that always stuck up and looked stupid on him and turned to look him in the eye.
Nita felt the warmth return to her when he nodded sleepily. "Good, I thought something was seriously wrong."
"I was sad, Nita," He said it with the face of a petulant five year old. "Something was seriously wrong."
She laughed and made to get up. "Well, I'm glad I could fix it. I'll go make us some hot tea."
His eyes widened. "NO!"
"Why?" She laughed and continued towards the kitchen. "It's got caffeine too, it will work for now."
"NO NO NO!" The next thing she knew she was running the kitchen while he scrambled to catch her. He grabbed her round the legs sending them flying across his slick linoleum floors. They skidded to a halt after slamming into the table and a paper floated down.
Nita saw his eyes lock on it as he reached up to grab it but she pushed him and seized it before he could recover.
"NO NO NO NO!"
She unfolded it slowly while he stared on in horror. She felt the breath leave her body as the words connected in her head.
It was coffee stained and rumpled, died a little blue in some places where jeans had probably rubbed.
1. Pokes me in the cheek when I piss her off.
2. Hates my lime sherbet.
3. Cooks for me.
4. Organized to the point of obsession
It went on and on and on, covered front and back. She wanted to believe that it was about her former roommate Stacy, or his new neighbor Jen. Anyone but her. She had just gotten things sorted out in her brain and had filed her I Want Kit thoughts away as unrealistic and ridiculous. She had convinced herself that the tingling in her stomach was just her feeling nervous for Kit and his girl, whoever she was. It wasn't her. She didn't have a chance, or need a chance, and everything would continue as it was.
It wasn't her
Until she saw 26.
26. Willing to come over at 2:47 in the morning to help me. Without use of bribery.
He moaned and buried his face into his knees, hands behind his head. "Shit."
She punched him in the arm until he would look at her, dug her own list from the depths of her pocket.
"Nita, look. I'm really sorry. I didn't call you over here to make a move or anything and I'm sorry I even called and woke you up and I shouldn't have done it. I was just confused and you make sense and I wanted you to help-
Nita couldn't get him to take her own paper from her hands and quickly realized he wasn't about to shut up. She stuck it in his mouth.
He took it out and opened it. He really smiled.
They sat on the floor in the kitchen and stared at one another. Their faces were illuminated by the flickering light of the television and Nita could see a tooth paste add reflected in her friend's gorgeous eyes.
Was it possible? She had only entertained the idea for about seventy two hours. She needed more time to process. Kit, her best and closest friend, wanted to be with her. He wanted her there and couldn't stop thinking of her. She made him as fluttery and shaky as he made her. The death of the coffee maker became frighteningly clear- he'd thrown it.
His face was questioning as he tucked a piece of her bangs back and she smiled a bit when she nodded her head. Their eyes never left each other's. He placed his hand firmly at the back of her neck, she tilted her head up, and they kissed.
It was the best she'd ever had.
It was 4:09 when the marathon ended. 4:21 when she managed to fix his coffee maker.
He made her a cup of coffee at obscene hours of the morning for the second time that week. Sans shirt. And it was fabulous.
Thanks for reading. And thank you to everyone who reviewed in my long absence. I'm working on my next story now (Kit takes a spelling test, and fails) so the wait should be much shorter.