You are packed and ready to go. Your copy of Inkheart sits at the edge of you bed, waiting for you to pick it up and read it. Your plan is simple: Read yourself into Inkheart, meet your favorite characters, bug your least favorite characters, and return home after a week.

There is suddenly a knock on your window. You turn to see a young girl standing on your window ledge, grinning and waving some sort of guide. Curious, you walk over and open the window for the strange girl.

"Hello!" she says cheerfully, slipping into your room gracefully. You are too confused to say anything, and look at her blankly instead.

"So you're going into Inkheart, am I right?" she asks you. You nod slowly. How did she know?

"Excellent!" she exclaims, "I've been there multiple times, it's really nice there"

"You've actually been there?" you ask her in surprise. The girl nods excitedly.

"62 times, as a matter of fact. I'm such an expert on the Inkworld, that I've actually written a Guide." You are handed the book the girl had been holding.

Inkheart: The Guide

A Readers Guide to the Inkworld

Written by Pink Pigeon

"So you're Pink Pigeon from Fan Fiction?" you ask her.

"The one and only!" she says happily. You begin to flip through the Guide. There were chapters with the laws of Lombrica and Argenta, chapters with character bios, 'I Will Nots' and more.

"Looks helpful." you comment.

"Oh, it is! I give a copy to everyone who goes to the Inkworld, and they always come back safely."

"That's good."

"Yes. Well, there was this one time when Isobel_is_the_best got maimed by the Adderhead, and Chocolate_Cupcake lost her guide and was eaten by Night Mares, but everyone else came back alright."

You stare at the Guide and promise yourself that you won't lose it.

"Thanks, Pink Pigeon." you say to her, but she's already gone. You shrug and start reading the Guide.

A/N: So now I'm writing a guide to the Inkworld. I was inspired by The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy (great book, BTW) and decided to do a guide for Inkheart, because I know you've all at one point decided to try to read yourselves in, or are planning or reading yourselves in at the moment. So tell me what you think, and make a suggestion for what I should cover in the first chapter.

~Pink Pigeon