Yeah it's been done before, that age old question: What if THEY read our slash? Well, this is in response to a fic called 'Just The Two Of Us' I thought it would be funny and well…a few of you understand. Lmao. WF ranting on Twitter in early morning hours. Anyway, it's short.
Just Us Boys
Chris leaned on the arm of his chair and watched through the glass windows as snow fluttered and whipped outside. It was already piled up high, and the winter storm advisory was up, causing flights to be delayed, and even canceled. In the past, as a younger man, it might have annoyed him but by now he was used to the potential hassles that always came with traveling 200+ days of the years. It was just part of the job by now, and hey, at least he was grounded in the airport with his best friend.
Chris glanced over at the dark haired man, who was opening his lap top, and he smiled. There was no better person to be stuck with, so said the matching gold bands on their fingers and the years—tumultuous or blissful—that they'd been together for. Each up, each down, each in between, they'd rode it out and stayed strong when others might have splintered. They were in fact, one of the most respected couples on the roster and arguably one of the cutest too. Hunter was the one who would argue that, he was under the impression that he and Jeff were the cutest couple. Chris joked that 'cute' didn't come with a nose the size of Himalayas.
The blond reached over and rested his hand on top of Matt's. The warm, familiar feeling, of their skin touching was comforting and always special no matter how many times they traded the simple affection. That's what love is. Chris thought to himself, and then almost laughed out loud for being so mushy. But Matt Hardy was capable of doing these things to the great Chris Jericho. Then, instead of Chris giggling, it came from Matt. Chris quirked an eyebrow at the younger man, as his sparkling, earth-tone eyes moved over the screen of the laptop.
"What's so funny, babe?" Chris leaned into Matt a little, and propped his chin on his shoulder so he could see what was on the screen.
"This website." Matt turned the laptop a little to give Chris a better view. "You know how I am with social networking sites and all that, well I ran across this one day. It's a site where fans write fictional stories about their favorite t.v. shows, movies, books, all kinds of things. There's a wrestling category where fans write about us too."
"Oh. What do they write, fantasy matches and stuff like that?"
"Ha! Um, in a way you could say that, but not any matches that take place in the ring."
Chris looked at Matt, a bit confused.
"What do they write?"
"Just fictional things, all sorts. Most of it's romantic though, they pair us off with people and stuff like that. Some of the people who write these stories do specifically hetero pairings, but there's ones that do same sex pairings too. It's called 'slash'. I kind of got interested in it and read about it on Wikipedia too. Original fan fiction slash started in the seventies with Star Trek when fan writers began to write Spock and Captain Kirk as a couple. So readers would know they were being written as a couple they'd write 'Spock/Kirk' rather than 'Spock and Kirk'. Eventually the slash mark between the two names became a whole kind of genre of fan fiction writing." Matt finished, scrolling down the screen.
"Wow…you sound like a complete nerd." Chris ribbed, wrapping his fingers through Matt's. "So, who do they put us with?" He finally asked, watching as Matt pulled up a story.
"Actually, ha. Well Jeff and I get put together a lot. Maybe we should be a little less 'brotherly' on The Hardy Show. I never really realized people might take it that way, but it is kind of funny."
Chris was now regarding Matt seriously.
"Would you ever sleep with Jeff?"
"Shut up!" Matt laughed, swatting Chris on the arm. Now they were both laughing.
"What?" Chris asked innocently, pouting. "I just asked."
"Sure Christopher, I know exactly where you mind is right now. It's not gonna happen. Neither is Adam. They put me with Adam a lot too. I can kind of see where that comes from though too, I mean we used to be best friends."
Matt chose not to answer that question, just shifted in his chair, the corners of his mouth twitching.
"Anyway…" Matt plowed on, ignoring the pokes and nudges from Chris who was now badgering him about The Sleazey One. "They put you with Adam too once in a while, or Shawn, or Christian."
Chris was thinking back to that intense feud in 2007 with Shawn, and nodded his head imagining how it might have looked to some. It was the same thing as when Vince had done the whole storyline with Adam, Matt, and Lita. The boss never missed an opportunity. If there was bad blood or wounded hearts outside of the ring, well hell, might as well take that emotion and put it into the ring. At least now, in real life, Shawn and Chris had been able to patch up their differences. Besides, having Matt by his side now, anything he ever thought he'd felt for Shawn seemed ridiculous.
"But the best person they pair you with," Matt continued. He turned to Chris, and placed a quick, soft kiss to his lips. "Is me."
Chris looked shocked, and leaned forward and squinted at the screen. How did they know? The two of them rarely worked together in the ring, hadn't had any significant storylines together, and didn't make a big to-do about making their relationship and marriage public.
"Love has ways of making itself known." Matt said, shutting the laptop.
"Wow, you're deep. You should write a book Dr. Phil."
Matt pulled his hand away from Chris's and shifted in his chair so they were facing.
"Yeah, I'll call it How To Love Like Matticho."
"What the hell is Matticho?"
"Matticho is us. That's another thing the fan fiction writers do, they splice names together: Matticho, Shawter, Jorrie, Jaria,—you know like creative did with Jeri-show."
"That's so wrong. Matticho?"
Matt blinked, frowning.
"What's wrong with it Chrissy?"
Chris's scowl bloomed into a wide, cocky grin.
"Because assclown, my name comes first. Those parasites, what are they thinking about? Clearly, our name should be Jerihardy."
Matt leaned back in his seat, stroking Chris's hand, looking at the ceiling for a while thinking it over. Chris was still rambling on in the meantime, about just how and why Jerihardy was a million times better than Matticho, which sounded like the name of some experimental concoction at Starbucks.
"Jerihardy wouldn't work. It's not specific enough. Jerihardy could be you and me, or you with Jeff." Matt finally said, locking his eyes with Chris's dancing cobalt ones.
"Or it could mean all three of us." Chris put in, a hint of mischievousness clearly in his voice.
"No Chris. Hunt would never, ever, let Jeff sleep with us, or anyone else for that matter."
"Ah-ha!" Chris exclaimed, leaping out of his seat, pointing. His cry of discovery startled Swagger who was sleeping in the chair next to him, and the tall blond grumbled and moved so he was laying his head on Mike's shoulder, who then shoved him off. "So Matt, you would sleep with Jeff!"
"I didn't say that, I just said…oh forget it Chris. Have your fantasy if you like."
"Fine, I just will. Hell, maybe I'll write a story about it. It'll be called: The Amazing Sexual Pursuits of Chris Jericho! It'll be a best seller, I know it." He was clearly joking, but the look of serious consideration on the Canadians face was just priceless.
Matt slapped his palm against his forehead, laughing. He loved Chris so, so much.