Disclaimer: I own nothing, I bow to Joss' and Seth's awesomeness. This was made to honor him and his great characters and for me to have a bloody good time! lol enjoy!
Rating: PG-13? Violence, that's it. Typical Spike stuff
Pairing/characters: Spike and the giant chicken from Family Guy (Not slash lol!)
Warnings: Funny violence that I and my friend and sometimes co-writer Maxwell () came up with one night. Cross over with BTVS and Family Guy
Summary: Spike fighting the Giant Chicken from Family Guy, 'nuff said.
Spike looked around as he held an awesome hand, the others had folded and he was about to win himself a box of 12 kittens, 1200 bucks, a new Zippo and vintage playboy magazine. The only other player: a giant chicken. Now Spike had seen some weird things in his day, but how a giant chicken was playing kitten poker with him at the moment he didn't care, probably because he was too smashed to give a damn.
Spike held a full house and he knew he'd win, it was a good hand. However, when the giant chicken across from him laid down his hand he saw 5 aces. Spike blinked a bit at the hand the chicken had just laid down and growled, "the hell, there aren't no bloody 5 aces in a deck. You son of a…"
Spike leapt across the table containing the huge pot and landed on the chicken who began to punch at him already. They both rose from the floor and began to throw punches at each other. Spike backed up, wanting to get some room to kick out at the ridiculous looking chicken when they came to one of the pool tables.
The other demons around scrambled out of the way and Spike grabbed a nearby cue stick. He smashed the thing over the giant chicken's head but it didn't seem to do much damage. The shards fell to the floor and the chicken picked one up and brandished it like he would stake Spike.
"Not bloody likely mate!" Spike growled as he threw a round-house kick in and knocked the wooden object from the chicken's…uh...wing.
The chicken squawked as spike punched him right in the face. They had backed up toward the wall and the chicken grabbed the payphone off the wall and smashed it into Spike's head.
Spike grabbed a hold of the thing before the chicken could smash him again, "need 50 cents to call someone who cares!?" Spike ripped it out of the chicken's hands and threw it. It hit square in the beak. Continuing to fight Spike backed up to the bar and ducked when the chicken tried to hit him in the head with a stool. He went around behind the bar and grabbed some bottles to toss at the chicken.
The chicken ducked a bottle of Jim Bean; it ducked a bottle of Absolute Vodka, but got hit in the face with Jack Daniels. Well… He didn't want to waist that one. Spike ducked back under the bar and went back to fighting the chicken as they took their fight outside. Once outside Spike grabbed a pipe lying on the ground and bashed it into the chicken's side.
The chicken grabbed it and jerked it away and started to bash it on Spike's head. The pipe only bent, guess he's got a hard head after all. When the pipe was bent too much to be of much use the chicken tossed it away and went back to using his fists.
They backed up toward until they reached a manhole that was uncovered and both fighters fell down into the muck where they continued to fight on. Spike punched and kicked for all he was worth but the chicken just wouldn't go down. It was probably a bloody cyborg knowing his luck.
Spike suddenly got an idea as he started to kick and back the chicken back up to an electrical box just below Willy's. He grabbed the chicken's head and bashed it into the electrical box over and over again until finally its beak broke though the outer shell and the chicken got electrocuted.
Spike backed up to watched the chicken. "Anyone up for some Kentucky Fried Chicken," Spike mumbled. When the chicken's body finally fell to the ground and smoked Spike was satisfied and limped back toward Willy's bar to collect his winnings. He was gona get Xan to give him a full body rub down tonight, and he meant FULL body.
Behind him however, the chicken looked to lay dead, but as Spike climbed the latter back to the bar it's left eye opened and he squinted-glared at the blonde vampire. This wasn't over!