Disclaimer: I own nothing, I bow to Joss' and Seth's awesomeness. This was made to honor him and his great characters and for me to have a bloody good time! lol enjoy!
Rating: PG-13? Violence, that's it. Typical Spike stuff
Pairing/characters: Spike/Xander and the giant chicken from Family Guy
Warnings: Funny violence that I and my friend and sometimes co-writer Maxwell () came up with one night. Cross over with BTVS and Family Guy
Summary: Spike fighting the Giant Chicken from Family Guy, 'nuff said.
"Wow this place really is nice Mr. I'm-not-the-romantic-type-vampire," Xander said as he sat at the booth of one of the swankiest restaurants in town.
"It's Valentines Day luv, had t'do somethin' good for you." Spike said as he settled in beside Xander. They were currently setting in a booth that was round around a round table. Behind the booth was the glass window facing out to the street. The two lovers were sharing a couple glasses of champagne while they waited for their dinner.
"Oh Spike, this is just great. You are such a softy." Xander said as he leaned against his vampire. If Buffy could have one so could he!
"Yeah, right, but if you tell anyone I'll deny it an then beat your ass till it's a nice cherry red." Spike said as they drank at the bubbly beverage.
Xander laughed softly at that, "can we do that anyway?" Spike grinned, his boy was incorrigible.
Spike was about to sip at his champagne when the waiter carrying their food came up. He looked up and dropped the glass that he'd been drinking from. In front of them stood a giant chicken, "oh bollocks."
Before Xander could ask what was going on Spike jumped up from the booth as the chicken smashed the tray of food right at him. Spike kicked the chicken and the chicken dove at Spike. The two went crashing though the window behind the booth and rolled out onto the sidewalk kicking and punching each other.
Pedestrians got out of the way as the two got up and started to fight each other and try to over all kill each other. They crashed into the shop next to the restaurant that was full of women's clothes. They went though racks and racks of clothes fighting and trying to kill each other.
When they finally crashed back out of the store Spike had a bra on his head while the giant chicken had a purple dress on. They crashed into a stand on the sidewalk containing fruit. When they came back out of the stand the giant chicken had melons! A couple of melons had gotten wedged in the top portion of the dress and Spike punched both real hard to spew the chicken with the guts of the melons.
They next crashed into a package store near by and Spike wished he'd had time to indulge. When they got by the isle with the bourbon and whiskies he held up his hands. "Whoa there, time out." Spike reached up and grabbed a bottle of Jack Daniels off the shelf and took a long swig from it. He looked at the bottle and then looked at the chicken before smashing the bottle over its head.
The chicken squawked as the bottle smashed on him and he was doused in liquor. He started to squawk as Spike pulled out his lighter and lit the chicken on fire. "Yeah, now we got some real KFC going."
The chicken grabbed a random bottle of liquor and smashed it against Spike's head. They both crashed though the back of the store where there was a puddle of water that put the chicken out. They continued to fight as they backed out of the alley they were in. Spike's shirt was ripped and he looked totally beaten up. However as they crossed the street neither paid much attention to the bus coming. Spike stepped out of the way just in time for the bus to hit the chicken.
Spike groaned and drug himself back toward the restaurant to join Xander again. When he finally plunked himself back into the seat Xander was at his side in a split second. Spike sat back as Xander frantically looked over Spike's wounds. "What the hell was that about!?"
"T-the…bloody chicken…cards…too many aces." Spike panted as he sat back.
Xander frowned looking around, "okay and the freakishly crazy award goes to…"
Spike waived his hand taking a drink. "Was nothing luv, we wont see him again." However as he said that the bus bound for LA drove away, the chicken stuck to the front opened an eye and glared toward the restaurant. This wasn't over…