Ok, this is my first fan fic, give it a try, and let me know what you think! :) Disclaimer: I love Stephenie Meyer, i wish i were her and had invented Bella and Edward and the whole crew. But i didn't . :( :) Enjoy!
Ok, this is my first fan fic, give it a try, and let me know what you think! :)
Disclaimer: I love Stephenie Meyer, i wish i were her and had invented Bella and Edward and the whole crew. But i didn't . :(
Chapter one: Hurt and Shattered
"Mommy, where are you going?" Jenny's voice came from behind me as I scrambled around the kitchen, looking for my wallet. I spun around to see my 5 year old daughter looking up at me with a worried expression, her adorable brown eyes wide.
"Oh honey, I'm sorry, I forgot to buy your and Ben's dinner on the way home from work, I promise I'll be back in 15 minutes, okay?"
Jenny nodded, and I bent down to give her a kiss on her head. "Ben is still asleep; will you lock the door behind me when I leave?"
Jenny nodded, but she hugged my leg and asked, "Why can't dad get it on his way home?"
I bent down and hugged my daughter tightly to me, pressing my face into her pale blonde hair, "He's in a meeting, so I can't disturb him, sweetheart, he'll still be at work after your dinner time, but tonight he promised that he'll be home in time for you to see him before you go to bed!"
A slow smile spread across Jenny's beautiful face, "Really?"
I smiled, happy to see my daughter's angelic smile, at the same time hoping that her father kept his word and didn't disappoint her- again. "Yeah." I kissed her one last time on her forehead, found my wallet, and walked out the door, waiting to hear Jenny turn the latch on the lock; before hurrying down the small stone path and heading down the road towards the Grocery shop in a hurry.
I was always nervous leaving my children alone in the house- even with the door locked- but at the moment hiring a nanny was just too expensive an option and I didn't trust the neighbors enough to handle Jenny and Ben with care.
It was a 5 minute walk to the store, and the streets were relatively quiet as the majority of people hadn't finished work yet. I didn't work, so I was able to pick up Jenny and Ben from school everyday easily.
I sighed, as I thought about the financial problems my family was going through at the moment; I hadn't been able to get a better job than waitressing.
My Husband Jack was keeping us – or more like me, I preferred to keep our financial problems hidden from my children- in hope, telling me that all his late nights were worth it, that very soon he was going to get a promotion, and that "everything will be alright". I also knew that he had a very foxy, bitchy colleague, who also 'worked' the late nights with him. It wasn't hard to imagine what else my husband got up to in these late nights, but at this point I was just focused on getting my family through this rough patch. I decided that I couldn't accuse Jack of anything until I had hard evidence. Who knew? Maybe I was just being paranoid.
But as I stepped into the comforting warmth of the small Grocery store, and greeted Danielle- the cashier- I knew, even as I pushed my thoughts to the back of my head, I knew that I wasn't just being paranoid.
As Jack ate at the office, I only looked for food for myself, and more primarily, my Jenny and Ben. Gosh, everything was getting so expensive these days!
I was more focused on feeding my children than myself; and as I spent most of the $15 I had on their food, I only had enough to buy myself something small, but it didn't matter in the least to me.
I quickly paid with Danielle, and then stepped out of the Grocery store, and began up the road again home. The roads were starting to fill with traffic, as people got off work.
Not my husband, though, I thought wryly. The autumn air was crisp against my pale, ivory skin, and the wind sent orange and red leaves into my dark brown hair as I headed up the sidewalk.
What I saw next stopped me- and my heart- in its tracks.
No. No way. It can't be.
I was hallucinating. I had to be. That was it. My Hallucinations had started again.
Except, what I was seeing was perfectly real.
Heading down Petersburg St, in the opposite direction of which I had been walking, I had seen a car. I had heard it honk. It was definitely there.
It was a Volvo.
A silver Volvo.
All pathways of thought had frozen for me. I was so dazed by what – by who – this Volvo could mean, that I didn't think to look inside, to look for the driver; I hadn't focused on much more after seeing the Volvo; suddenly, I was completely unaware of my whereabouts and surroundings, I was smacked by a horde of people trying to get past me, shouting complaints at me, and was forced to continue walking up the sidewalk. I was barely aware of what as happening around me, and before I knew it, I had walked directly into a tree.
That stopped me up short, and I looked around myself. People were shooting me looks which were obvious that they thought I was mental, deranged. The crowd of people had lessened now, and I turned, my eyes searching again for the silver Volvo. With a pang of disappointment- and a familiar pain ripping across my chest- I realized that the Volvo was now gone.
I sighed, and turned back to continue my walk home, with a sudden realization of what an idiot I was.
Just because it was a Volvo, doesn't mean it was him. There are plenty of Volvo's in the world- it was merely a coincidence. It's been 9 years. He doesn't want me. He's moved o—
"Bella!" My train of thought was stopped as a familiar voice called me from behind. I swung around, and found myself face to face with Emily. At first I couldn't put my finger on who she was- having only woken up from my daze a couple of seconds ago- but then I remembered, she was the mother of Jenny's best friend at school – Dana- and I had come to be quite good friends with her recently.
I felt my cheeks turn slightly red as I realized that I has just been standing there, looking like an idiot. "Oh..Hey! How are you?"
"Oh I'm fine. A little bit rushed, have to fetch Dana from ballet in a few minutes. Fancy running into you here, where were you at the school today? I must have missed you, but I needed to give you these papers to sign for the after-school club…" As she began scratching through her bag, I felt my phone buzz in my pocket. I reached in to take it out. Jack was calling.
What a surprise, I thought. I had practically been expecting this call. I answered, "Hi Jack."
Jack didn't answer for a moment; he was talking to someone else. Busy, as always.
His voice finally came to the receiver, "Hi, Bella? Yeah, listen, I'm so sorry, I won't be able to come home earlier tonight, we've had a problem with the investors. I'll only be home at around--"
"One," I said bitterly. I had finished that sentence for him too many times.
"Yeah. Wait- you didn't tell Jenny I'd be home earlier, did you?"
I sighed. "What do you think, Jack?"
Jack's voice came back angry now, "Bella, do you want her to get her feelings hurt?!"
Oh my god. "Jack, you're the one who can't keep your promises!" I shot back.
I heard Jack mutter, "Jesus- I can't deal with you now. I'll see you later." With that, he hung up. I felt tears spring up in my eyes as I thought of how I would have to break the news to Jenny- again.
And then I realized that Emily was still standing in front of me.
She had managed to find the papers, and was now looking at me with concern and I put my phone away and tried to blink away my tears.
"Another late night for Jack?" She guessed, understanding in her forest green eyes.
"Yeah. Jenny will be so upset, she misses her dad. I don't know what I can do, to make it up to her."
Emily gave me a quick, but comforting hug, and then her face lit up as she got an idea, "Jenny and Dana are joined at the hip. And so are Ben and Embry. Why don't they stay the night at ours tonight, that way you have the night off to sort things out with Jack?"
I thought about that, and it seemed like a good idea. I didn't bother mention that Jack would only be home at one, I fully planned to stay up and wait for him; this time I wouldn't let his late night of 'work' slip. I felt a sudden pang of unease when I thought of why I had let all his late nights slip, put I pushed that thought away.
I thanked Emily, and then half-ran the rest of the way home, realizing that I had been out longer than intended.
That evening, after Emily had come and fetched Jenny and Ben to take over to her place, and I was sitting on the couch, flipping through the TV channels- and eventually giving up-, waiting for Jack to come home; my mind began to wander again to the hours earlier when I had spotted that Volvo. My heart lurched as I thought, what if it had really been him in the Volvo?
But I silently kicked myself, I was only causing myself unnecessary pain by thinking of that. Besides, that part of my life was over. It had been 7 years now since Edward had left me. Even if I would always be partly crushed by how he didn't want or love me, my life had moved on. I had the two most wonderful children in the world and a husband who was—
I couldn't bring myself to even think it. Jack had changed so much. I could barely call him nice. I knew our marriage was ending, like a lot of people had predicted when we first got married. I sighed. It had all happened so fast. My mind began to remember those first few years… Being crushed after Edward had left me. Being a zombie. Meeting Jack in the first year of college Doing things to-I winced guiltily- hear Edward's voice. Falling in love. Being Reckless. Falling Pregnant. Getting married.
Everything had changed after that. Jack wasn't the same person now as he was then. As soon as he had gotten involved in the investment business, he had become obsessed with his work. And when things had started to go downhill for him and the business, that's when it got bad.. that's when he got violen—
I looked up, and realized I hadn't heard Jack pull up in the driveway, or walk in the room. He was now standing in front of me, and gave me a fright.
"Oh!" I stood up, startled, "Hi."
I stood there awkwardly, not quite able to meet his piercing grey eyes.
"Where are the kids?"
"Sleeping over at Emily's."
"Was that really such a good idea? On a school night?"
My voice came back sharper, "Since when do you care?"
Jack's eyes got angry, but before he could talk, I cut him, "And by the way, it's a Friday. But I guess you wouldn't really know the difference since you're gone all the time." I didn't know where all my confidence was coming from. Usually his dark, intimidating eyes were enough to scare me, let alone his big, muscular body build.
I could see that Jack was getting angrier by the minute, what with him and his short tempers.
"Have you forgotten, that I'm the reason there is food in this house, that there is a roof above your head--" He was speaking each word distinctly, his teeth clenched.
I interrupted him again, "You don't LET me work!! You treat me like we're in the 1960s!"
"I was saving you from humiliation, Bella, like YOU would every get a job around here!"
That stung. And then just like that, I let out all the emotion I had been feeling for the past few years,like a bomb,"WELL THEN DON'T COMPLAIN ABOUT IT! You're never here for the kids anymore, Jenny misses you SO much. I'm basically raising her single-handedly! How often do you see her?! Once, maybe twice a week?! It's hard enough even if you ARE working, whenever you stay back in the office, but I mean, COME ON JACK! Really?! Are you really working, or are you sleeping with that slutty, blonde, long-legged, hair-brained bitch of yours, Alicia, every chance you get?! I'm not stupid Jack, how many time have I heard her talking to you in the backround when you've been on the phone to me? Well I guess you don't really CARE, do you? About your family, your CHILDREN especially!"
I was panting by now, I had barely taken in a breath.
I also noticed that Jack no longer looked angry. He looked furious. He began walking towards me, and instinctively I began backing away. I started to tremble. My confidence wasn't here anymore, now that I had gotten everything off my chest.
"Are you accusing me of cheating on you? Don't you dare. Don't. You. Dare." I could practically feel the furious vibes rolling off him.
I tried to dodge him, but he caught both my wrists in his steely grip, very, very tightly.
"Let GO of me!" I struggled, but instead he pushed me against the wall with an audible smack as my head hit it. He leaned in forward, seething, "You are bloody ungrateful, you know that? You were the one who wanted kids, who decided to go through with that first pregnancy-" I felt a shock and a lurch in my stomach at his words "- so don't blame me for not being there for something I never wanted. And as for Alicia- well, she gives me more than you ever did. But I am your husband, as as my wife you owe me a lot more respect than you give me, alright? All you have to do is put food on a plate every evening for the children, and keep the house clean. That's nothing compared to what I do every day. Nothing."
And with that he shoved me aside, nearly knocking me into the glass table. That was it. Jack had used up all my straws, and he had now burned the last one.
The tears were streaming down my face now, I didn't even bother to try and conceal it.
I did not gather up a single thing, I just walked silently towards the front door.
Jack sighed, "Where the hell are you going, Bella?"
I turned towards him, put on my brave face, and said, "I'm leaving you."
This seemed to be amusing to Jack, as a bitter chuckle slipped from his lips, "Yeah? Where you gonna go?"
"The gutter would be better than with you."
A flash of anger crossed his face. "You'd do that to the children?"
My voice came back steely and hard, "I will fetch them from Emily's tomorrow. If you go anywhere near them, I will call the police."
This seemed to set Jack on fire, "FINE THEN! JUST GO! SEE IF YOU MANAGE OUT THERE WITHOUT MY MONEY! BUT DON'T COME CRYING BACK, BELLA!"
I turned to him calmly, "Goodbye, Jack." And with that, I turned on my heel towards the door.
But before I got there, one of the metal kitchen counter chairs had smashed into the back of my neck and head, and I fell to my knees.
I gasped at the pain that thrashed across my head. I felt my head, and something warm and liquid was spreading out into my hair. Without looking back at Jack, I staggered out the door and down the steps, running now.
It was pouring with rain outside, but I didn't care, I just kept going. I was sobbing hard, at what at just happened, at the pain in my head, at my indecision of where I was going to go. I didn't care; I just had to get away. I ran the whole time, down the road, wherever my feet took me. At some point I slipped on the wet pavement, and managed to graze my chin and knees to bleeding point.
Everything had turned into a blur, and I just continued through the roads for an immeasurable amount of time, the streets were empty by this point, only the occasional car passed by.
At some point, time began to mean something to me again, my surroundings became clearer. There was a throbbing pain in my feet, and I realized that I had ran barefoot all that way.
That thought also lead me to realize something else.
I had absolutely no idea where I was.
I had somehow managed to block out the full extent of my pain while I had been running, but now t all came rushing back to me.
I felt the back of my head again, and with a shock I became conscious of just how much I had bled. I also thought I felt some pieces of metal there—
I winced, the pain was growing worse and worse now and I began to feel slightly dizzy and woozy.
Mercifully, though, I realized I did know where I was, even as the dizziness slowly got worse, as I saw a familiar sign labeled 'Seattle Grace Hospital- 1.5km'
I barely paid attention to the sign, all I knew was that I needed help, and I needed it fast. I began to run again in the direction that the sign indicated, and as my dizziness got worse, I ran faster, praying that my legs, my head, my body wouldn't give in before I reached the hospital.
I could see it now; it was getting closer and closer. But I was gasping for breath, I was pushing beyond my limits, I just needed to get through those Emergency Entrance doors…
I was 10 meters away..
A sharp twist of pain went through my knee…
My feet were ready to give in…
I could feel a black haze closing in on my peripheral vision.
I burst through the Emergency Entrance doors, and more a split second nothing happened; and then medical staff rushed forward to help me as I finally let my feet give in.
The last thing I saw gave me my own confirmation that I was going nuts. I was seeing things.
Because not 10 meters away, looking up in shock and rushing forward, were too men I recognized very well. They were Greek Gods.
Carlisle and Edward.
Hehe, hope you like the cliff hanger ^^
Did i get too/ not enough intensity?
Please review :)x