The Broken Wings of Icarus
chapter o1: love
Love, n. A temporary insanity--sometimes fatal but more frequently to the physician than to the patient.
She loves him.
His ever-present scowl, that shock of bright orange hair that reminds her so much of life and vitality, the aura of confidence that only he can project. She would carry this love through five lifetimes and beyond for him. Kurosaki-kun is a kind and good person, a truly good person, so wonderful that sometimes it makes her hurt--right there, in the chest behind the ribs by the lungs around her veins and tissues, pulsating with the steady flow of blood.
Kurosaki-kun is so wonderful that he sometimes reminds her of how terribly ugly and horrible she is. But she loves him and perhaps this is the kind of hopeless love that can only cause her pain.
She loves him.
Kurosaki-kun is so strong. He can protect people and she can see the sunlight when she looks at him, proud and undefeated. He will always be the sun. He can't lose. She looks at her hands, slender and soft without the callus that comes with wielding a sword, and tastes hatred in the back of her throat. It is always next time, next time, next time that she vows to be worthy of standing by his side to fight.
But next time has come and passed and gone and she sits useless on the ground. Smile. She wants to say to Kurosaki-kun, smile or my world will turn black. She wants him to look at her, to turn and say that everything will be fine and that he'll save her from herself. She wants him to scowl and tell her to stay away so she won't be hurt. She wants…she wants….
She loves him.
Even if the scowl is no longer present because his face is turned to the ground, even if the shock of bright orange is now a shade of dark red, even if that aura no longer exists. Even if Kurosaki-kun is bleeding and bleeding and he isn't talking and there is only the hushed silence to speak to her. And her eyes are so wide, wide, wide, and the blood is so red, red, red. And her vision is red now, red fading black and getting blacker.
Someone is screaming. Who is it? Who could be screaming?
I can't hear Kurosaki-kun if you scream. She thinks to herself annoyed by the incessant wailing, with her knees digging into the ground and shards of sanity falling between the cracks of her fingers. Please be quiet. But the scream is getting louder and louder and higher and higher.
Her throat hurts. She's thirsty. And Kurosaki-kun isn't moving.
Please, she whispers to herself. Please, wake up. I need you. Her throat is burning, why? She's withering away without the sun. Why is it so dark? There's no light.
She blinks without seeing anything. Please stop saying his name like that. Kurosaki-kun is fine, he's resting. Please don't disturb his rest by screaming so loudly. There are tears falling from her eyes in erratic patterns, but who is this stranger girl wearing her face and crying? She isn't sad. She isn't sad at all. Don't worry, she thinks subconsciously. Everything is fine. Everything is fine. Because…because…
Don't you know?
She loves him.
Author's Notes: Definitions are from the Devil's Dictionary This fiction will not ship any pairings overtly, although any good fan with shipper glasses on will be able to catch hints. These chapters will be mostly short and revolve around the common theme of idol worship. The title is a direct inference to the Greek myth of Icarus, the boy who made wings out of wax and flew too high to the sun. His wings melted and he fell to his death in the ocean, where he drowned.
Please understand that none of the future chapters will be happy, most will contain some element of despair and one or two will undergo the same short, staccato sentences that denote insanity as this chapter. The general length you can expect will be between 500 to 2000 words, so fairly short pieces that will be loosely tied together. Think of this as a collection of one-shots.
For the curious, the idol - admirer relationships that will be explored in this multi-chapter work are: Aizen - Hinamori, Tousen - Shuuhei, Kensei - Shuuhei, Yoruichi - Soi Fong, and possibly Gin - Kira. The order hasn't been decided yet, so if you feel a strong urge to see one of these explored next, feel free to leave a review telling me so. I promise I'll take your comments seriously.
Thanks for reading!