Title: Things that are holy
Summary: one morning, there's a pamphlet at their door.
Genre: canon-slash, humour, fluff
Characters or Pairing: Milo Sturgis/Rick Silverman
drabbles100 challenge: 020. Colourless.
Warning: none really. You don't mind refferences to sadomasochism, do you?
Word count: 500
Disclaimer: don't own, just burrow.
Before Richard opened the door, he picked up the mail on the floor and sorted it out briefly. Milo sighed at the old habit, impatient at the door and ready to go. Then his partner picked what looked like a couple of pamphlets out of the pile and stared at it for a moment. He said, "Oh, my God." Quietly, as if he couldn't believe his eyes.
"What?" Milo asked, and Rick gave him a copy.
The pamphlet was entitled Protect the Santity of Marriage and was everything Milo expected it to be, only more explicit than he was used to. No more texts, just a bunch of random pictures thrown around in no apparent order, resulting in a crude work of art that made everything even more gross.
A skinny young men, naked, tied up and being flogged by an older master in tiny leather shorts that made Milo flinch. Hairy old guys being penetrated by what seemed to be anything avvailable in the set - from dildos to broomsticks. Threesomes, foursomes, nine-ten-eleven-whoa-thats-a-lot-somes. Handcuffs and gags everywhere and a general mess of sperm, sweat and blood.
Richard ripped his pamphlet in pieces. "That is just disgusting!"
"I know." Milo said, absent-minded.
Rick took one look at him, staring at the piece of paper with a wrinkle between his eyebrows. "You okay there?"
"I'm fine. I just feel a bit... boring."
"Boring?" He repeated, unsure if that meant Milo was sad or offended.
"And old. I mean, they're saying we're masochistic, leather loving, oversexed creatures."
"How come we just spent our saturday night watching CSI reruns, pointing out the factual mistakes?" Milo asked, staring at him, intrigued.
Rick blinked. "Come again?"
"Mister, we need some new ideas." And held the pamphlet so Rick could see it, as if announcing a new wonderful product.
Rick took one look at the paper. Then into Milo's amused eyes. Rolled his own eyes up to the ceilling, took the pamphlet from his hands and tried hard not to smile when he openned the door. "Very funny." And stepped out.
Milo followed him to the garbage can, already chuckling. "Who says I'm kidding?"
"Well, I don't think me whipping your ass would be the solution to our problems."
"That's not how I played it in my head."
"Of course it isnt." Rick said with a more lenient voice that made Milo keep going.
"Either way, do you happen to see any CSI on this, Rick? Clearly, we're being gay the wrong way."
Richard threw the pieces of paper in the trash and headed for the car. "That's only because CSI reruns don't win conservatives' votes, Milo."
"It's a bit ironic, though. Isn't it?"
"Well", said Milo, standing by the porsche ", sex sells everything nowadays, even disapproval of sex itself."
"Yeah" Rick smiled from the other side of the car. "They should try it for teen abstinance."
"CSI would work better." And got into the passenger seat, listening to Richard burst into laughter.