Kissing meme -- Heero/Sasuke, Resigned, for Luel Exana. (I AM SO SORRY. Wait, I'm not.)
"This doesn't make sense," Sasuke growled in frustration.
Heero watched his clenched fists and the way his eyes flickered red. "Less sense than being pulled out of your dimension by lines of ink on a flat surface and three nonsense words?"
"Yes. A lot less. It's not possible to use that... that as the trigger to anything, much less a summon."
Heero snorted softly. "It doesn't have to be a direct trigger. A micro-camera would be enough to tell them when the conditions are fulfilled."
This time around, they didn't get into an argument about how Sasuke hadn't seen any, and how Heero's technology was better and Sasuke just didn't know what to look for, and how Sasuke's eyes were better so that shouldn't matter etcetera. Sasuke just gave a short sigh of frustration and jerked his chin at the ceiling. "You want me to carry you."
Heero gave a short nod. It wasn't like he could stick to the walls to check the high ceilings, so that was just logical. At least Sasuke wasn't a complete idiot...
So Sasuke carried Heero up to the ceiling, and even stood perpendicular to the wall and let him use him as a seat. It did nothing, save proving that even ninjas weren't immune to lactic acid buildup in cases of prolonged muscular tension, and that if there were cameras, they were too small for the eye to see.
"... Let's try the instructions."
Heero had an end to his patience, too, and it was coming fast. "You have a better idea?"
Sasuke glared at him with his red eyes, but it took more than that to unnerve Heero.
He almost put a bullet in Sasuke when the irritated ninja leaned forward too fast and planted a short, hard kiss on his lips.
Nothing happened -- or had it? "The writing," Heero said.
Sasuke's eyes narrowed in annoyance. "I'm not blind."
On the wall, the instructions had been amended with 'Not enough tongue.' Sasuke's teeth ground together hard enough for Heero to hear it.
Heero wasn't too sure how the tongue was supposed to be applied. He'd researched the subject some so he could blend in a little better, sat through a few romance movies, skimmed a few teen magazines; he wasn't entirely clueless. Never practiced it on his own, though. There was a first time to everything. He kissed Sasuke again, flicked his tongue at him until he unclenched his lips, and methodically started mapping the insides of the angry ninja's mouth.
Nothing happened, save for Sasuke's spine straightening up even more, making Heero crane his neck uncomfortably so he could keep contact. He scowled, in no mood to put up with this nonsense.
"Instructions say 'kiss each other.' This means you have to kiss me back."
With a little growl, Sasuke swooped down and kissed back, stiff and a little too fast.
Heero wasn't sure how he kept from biting the other boy; probably only because his halfhearted fantasies tended to involve bullets through the foot instead.
They broke apart, breathing a little harder, lips wet and puffy and eyes cold and really, really unhappy.
"Oh, finally," Heero muttered as he felt the sudden tug and weightlessness he had experienced only a hour and a half ago. He gave a last look at his unvoluntary companion, and then they both disappeared, hopefully to reappear where they'd come from.
Behind her screen, the fanficcer chortled evilly.
Then she realized she'd written the lamest, cheapest writing trick ever in the history of ever, and facepalmed. Damn it. Her writerly pride would never recover. Were a cracktastic kiss and a lot of tension between two favorites truly worth the unending shame?
... hell yes it was. Shame? Whazzat?