Hey! This is my new idea, because i am in love with Avatar, and really want to see how this idea plays out! Please tell me what you think, and dont be afraid to tell me if you dont like it! Enjoy! :D

oh, and this takes place during Jake's time there, only from a different prespective. And the story's going to be totally based on my OC...so if you're here looking for a story based on Jake and Neytiri (i know they're awesome, i love them too...), you're not going to find it...

ALSO (last thing, i promise) the entire movie is spoiled for you here, so if you havent seen the movie, go see it! why are you even looking up fanfiction for it if you havent seen it? kinda weird...

anyway, hope you guys like it! :P

Electronic Journal

Name: Sara Mason

Location: Abandoned RDA Station

Time/Date: I have no idea, seeing as this place has been a place of complete chaos for the past few days. I'll be sure to look at a clock and a calendar before imputing my next entry.


Entry 1

I had never expected to go to Pandora. No one back on Earth expected to go to Pandora, it was the kind of thing that was only dreamed about, the kind of fairy-tales that your mother told before you went to sleep.

Woven tales of distant forests filled with supernatural beings, bright swirling lights, people that wielded the magic with their golden eyes…

So when I, Sara Mason, an eighteen-year-old graduate majoring in biology, was put on one of the Pandora shuttles, those woven tales were the only images I had in mind of this distant planet.

Oh, how quickly my vision was shattered.

The moment I was led out of the shuttle, with my oxygen mask securely in place, I saw a man being carried on a stretcher, with a large feathered arrow protruding from his shoulder. I listened to his screams as he died, maybe a minute later, as I was pulled toward the large station that loomed over all the rest.

Those screams were only the beginning of the horrors I would witness on Pandora.

I was immediately put to work, and I heard whispers of the "Avatar" program that was being instated in the back quarters of the station, Hell's Gate, as people seemed to call it. But I didn't really understand this program, too focused in my own theories concerning the animal and plant life that inhabited this dangerous planet.

It's almost funny to imagine; I probably never would have even gotten stuck in this whole mess if I hadn't worked so diligently, worked almost non-stop. I was studying samples when everyone else was sleeping in their beds; I was researching when everyone had their coffee breaks.

A year later, I was one of the most knowledgeable scientists in my division, and it was then that I met Dr. Grace Augustine. I remember that day, when I was studying a particular root found in one of the trees, one of the roots that the others had pushed aside. There was nothing strange about it, they said, just a strange current of electrical molecules. Most of these scientists had forgotten what it was like for something they studied to be normal, so this peculiar piece of root didn't interest them. But I wasn't so sure, and so I snuck into one of the more advanced laboratories to examine it more closely.

I found that it actually had synapses, like those in the human brain, only more complex and more concentrated. How was it…possible, for a tree to have these? How had the others seen this as something to 'push aside'?

I was so intent on my task that I didn't notice the woman who came in, who walked over to stand behind me. I remember what she said so clearly, it's like it was yesterday.

"Synapses…just like the human brain. Amazing, isn't it?"

I had jumped so violently that I had almost knocked over the microscope. She had laughed, and I remembered the blush that had rushed to my face as I stared at my knees, waiting for her to start yelling at me.

I knew who this scientist was; she was Dr. Grace Augustine, one of the greatest biologists in the program. One of the most strict, hard-core, hostile scientists in this base, and she knew the rules as well as I did. This laboratory was strictly forbidden to first years, but I knew that the equipment at my other, lower level microscope wouldn't be able to analyze the root in full detail. Punishment for using other people's equipment could result in being sent back to Earth, losing your job…

With this in mind, you can imagine how shocked I was when she nudged me aside to look at my sample with an experienced eye, muttering quietly.

"You've got initiative, risking your ass to look at something the others didn't think was important. What's your name again?"

"S-Sara Mason, ma'am."

"I've heard some excellent things about you, Sara. Surprising for a first year, especially seeing as you're only nineteen. Most of you idiots are too stupid at first to really find your way around here."

"Um…thank you?" I had said, not sure whether to be flattered or insulted.

She went on, still eyeing me with her cool stare. " I'd say that it was time you got with some people who actually give a damn about learning about the life on Pandora. Come to the Avatar Station tomorrow, and we'll get you set up."

And then she stood up again, and left the office, leaving me almost fainting with surprise.

I had just been promoted to working with Dr. Grace Augustine – well, not with her really, but working in the same vicinity. This was like, a once in a lifetime chance, and I sure as hell wasn't going to turn it down!

Now that I look back on it, I wish I had turned the job down. But of course, I was so ecstatic that I didn't think to look into what exactly I would be doing…and by the time I realized it, it was too late.

The next morning, they took a sample of my DNA, and it was only after they had taken the sample did they inform me that I was now part of the Avatar Program, and that in six years I would have my own Avatar to drive.

Saying I was shocked would be the biggest understatement in the history of the world.

But, unfortunately, I couldn't go back now, because the whole Avatar business takes up a lot of money from the government, and for me to back out would be like shoving my middle finger in Dr. Augustine's face, which was a big mistake for anyone with a scrap of self-perseveration to make. And so I just nodded and smiled, and my work went on as usual, only now I was working with some of the top scientists in the Avatar facilities.

It was in the next six years that I came to know exactly what the alien culture of the Na'vi was, and what we were trying to accomplish by creating Avatars and by trying to negotiate with them.

It was terrifying.

I saw clips of Na'vi warriors attacking human foot-soldiers, and I found that I couldn't sleep for a week after watching it, because every time I closed my eyes, I saw the foot-soldier's fear as an arrow went through his heart.

Dr. Augustine assured us that as long as we remained peaceful and non-violent with the Na'vi, nothing like that would occur, but I felt the fear in my chest even as she reassured me.

What if it was too late for negotiating? What if the idiots shooting guns without a thought to what it would result in had already ruined our chances at a peaceful solution?

I didn't want to think about it.

Watching my Avatar mature was another frightening story altogether. It was as if I was watching a baby mature in the womb of its mother, only the weird part was that it was me, me in a way that was even more frightening. I had always been skinny and small for my age, but compared to my Avatar…

At the end of the long six years, my Avatar was 9'7", and so slender and inhuman that looking at it made me shiver. There was beauty in its – I had to keep reminding myself that they were my features too – features, but a cat-like, fierce beauty. Grace was pleased with my Avatar, saying how it looked much more like one of the natives than the usual, more human-like Avatars. Which was good…I guess. Still scary, though.

I'm trying not to get too ahead of myself, but I feel as if I'm wasting time telling you all of the petty details of the beginning of my life here.

None of this is important.

I need to skip forward, to the day that Jake Sully got lost in the jungles of Pandora. I was worried about him from the beginning, especially because of his background as a brave – but at the same time risky and careless – marine. Maybe he had gotten away with that kind of stuff back on Earth, but here, on Pandora, being careless is what got you killed.

Anyway, you can imagine the shock that circulated through the station when Jake woke up – a huge relief, we were afraid he had been killed by a thanator that Dr. Augustine had last seen him running from during the gathering of the tree root samples –only to tell us that he had been taken in by the Omaticaya clan, and was being taught their ways by the Omaticaya princess, Neytiri. It was a fluke; a once in a lifetime chance that was so unlikely that it hadn't crossed any of our minds. The Na'vi had been extremely hostile towards the ideas of Avatar mind linking, and they had shut down the school Dr. Augustine had created to teach the clan English as a result.

So life went on as usual, only with the small twist, the twist that made my stomach twist uncomfortably every time I thought about it.

Colonel Quaritch was now more involved than ever in the Avatar program, and I didn't like the way his eyes seemed to gleam with pride whenever he looked at Jake Sully, or when he put his scarred hand on the young man's shoulder as if to say, "He's yours to play with, but he answers to me in the long run."

I mentioned it to Dr. Augustine, and I was relieved when she seemed to notice it too after a week or two, and ordered for us to pack up some supplies to last them at least four months. She, a young biologist who focused on Pandorian culture named Norm Spellman, and Jake would travel into the deep parts of the Hallelujah Mountains, to escape contact with Colonel Quaritch and the other government officials who were more focused on how to eradicate the Na'vi rather than finding a diplomatic solution.

I felt a little sad as I watched them take off, but I knew that I was just another scientist who spent too much time in the labs and less time actually learning how to drive my Avatar.

In truth, I was scared when I was in my Avatar body, and when I looked at myself in the mirror I only saw an alien face with large, lemur-like yellow eyes and luminescent dots on the bridge of its nose and on its forehead and cheeks, the smooth blue skin patterned with faint, darker blue stripes.

It frightened me.

I instead focused on finding out the secrets to the roots of the Tree of Souls, as the Na'vi called it. It was their connection to Eywa, their goddess that controlled all life on Pandora.

But there were only so many hours I could spend looking at the microscope, and so another pastime arose. I began collecting the video-logs that Jake Sully sent in, watching them carefully.

I don't know why I did this, but I was entranced by the changes that occurred as the days went by. One day he'd be confident as hell, the next he was more subdued, glancing around as if expecting to see something else. Months passed, and I remember going back to one of the messages I had missed, and playing it.

"Everything is backwards now, like out there is the true world and in here is the dream."

I remember his face when he said those words, almost three months into his stay with the Na'vi people, how the soft blue light that lit up the shack lighted his hollow face. His eyes as they stared into the camera as if searching for answers in it's depthless lens. I remember sitting on my knees, sipping my tea. I remember my blood running cold as I slowly set the mug down on the metal counter, staring into the face of Jake Sully, and for the first time I saw him.

He was becoming one of them.

One of the Na'vi.

I knew – I think I had known for a long time, but had only just allowed it to be true – that Jake had fallen in love with Pandora, just as Dr. Grace Augustine had.

Everything was changing, I realized in that moment. I had slowly switched off the monitor, and stared out at the lush forests of Pandora, watching the rain make rivers on the thick glass that separated the jungle and I.

I had been there for six years…I had seen death in those trees, I had seen bloodshed, and I had seen terror.

But for the first time, as I stared out into the rain, I saw beauty.

I don't remember how I got there, but suddenly I was in one of the self- linking rooms, one that was hardly used anymore because of its difficulty to reach. I was small, so I was able to squeeze into the small room, and I prepared for a link with my Avatar. I jumped in, feeling disconnected from myself, as if I was watching myself from above.

It was the first time I had gone into my Avatar alone. Everyone else who had an Avatar was eating lunch, or studying. It was the first time that I didn't feel any hesitation as I pulled the wire, light covered mesh over my chest, and closed the heavy door over my head, sending me into calm darkness.

When I opened my eyes again, I was in the shack that was reserved for Avatars that weren't being used at the moment, and I slowly breathed in and out, relishing the lack of an oxygen mask.

My long, blue skinned legs swung gracefully over the sides of the cot, and I got to my feet. I felt the strength in my feet, and tucked the tight braids that went to my shoulders behind my pointed ears, and quickly unlocked the door. I was in a tank top and shorts, but I didn't think to put on a jacket, quickly darting out into the rain.

Now, I could try to explain the feeling I experienced as I ran through the hard-packed dirt of the compound, but I'd end up being at a loss for words. There were no words to describe this.

I was seeing beauty in this body for the first time.

The rain fell with delicate sounds on the broad leaves, my ears swiveling around to hear every call of the birds talking to each other beyond the wire fence that blocked us off from the forest. The flowers were drooping over with the weight of the water, and I felt my heart beating powerfully in my chest, felt the earth shift under my strong feet.

I don't know how far I ran, but when I stopped, I remember leaning my face back and holding my arms out to take in all the cold water that fell down in sheets, to take in every breath of air that filled my Avatar lungs.

Jake Sully…he had opened up my world. His words, his emotions, they had taught me how beautiful Pandora was.

I remember being pulled from my happiness by a yell from one of the soldiers. I had turned around, to see a gun being pulled on me. It was a burly soldier who I had often seen talking with Colonel Quaritch, and seeing him sent a thrill of unease through me. He yelled at me to get on my knees, and I did so without hesitation, asking what was wrong.

"Colonel's orders, all Avatars have to be quarantined, we're starting the attack on that big-ass tree. Why aren't you in the regular linking room?"

I remember my face going blank with horror. They were going to attack Hometree? What? I had gasped in shock, and ordered to know why they were initiating the attack. It was the first time I had ever talked back to one of my superiors, but I was not in my usual state of mind.

"Doesn't matter, they're savages! Now get down while I call for your link to be canceled. Get up, and follow me to the shack."

Savages? Neytiri, Mo'at…they were unfeeling animals? Those giggling children in the picture with Dr. Grace Augustine…they were savages? How could they be savages? Yes I was afraid of them, yes I agreed that they were dangerous, but savages? No…they weren't. They were only defending their land from humans, who weren't helping the situation by shooting at them and treating them like animals.

I remember being led back into the shack, and when I lay down I felt something warm filling my eyes as I heard a boom in the distance. Even from this distance, I could hear the missiles being fired, and, if I focused, the screams of the dying Na'vi.

I closed my eyes, and felt something drip down my face, but before I could register what it was, being disconnected abruptly tugged at my consciousness, and I opened my eyes to the saddened face of one of my closest friends here in the Station, Dr. Max Patel.

I remember clearing my throat, reaching up to touch my face, which was wet with tears.

"Are they really…?"

"Yeah. We tried to stop them, but…"

I had sat up hurriedly, and I felt that if I tried to get up out of the link-unit, I would see the destruction with my own eyes, see the fire raging in the forest that had once been so full of life. Even if I was afraid of it, it didn't justify this…this brutal annihilation.

Nothing would ever justify this.

I remember putting my face between my knees, and retreating into myself. Max had put his arm around my shoulders, and I had cried silently, watching as the teardrops fell on the green foam that made up the interior of the link-unit.

It was a horrible day.

I was led down by Max an hour later, only to witness Dr. Augustine and Jake hauled out of their units, Jake dazed and limp, his eyes filled with an emotion I don't have words for. Grace was more violent, kicking and screaming. Norm was punching one of the soldiers, his eyes streaming tears of horror and fury.

"You murderers!"

I covered my mouth with my hand to restrain my cries, and turned to bury my face in Max's shoulder. It was all so awful…so unfair. No one should have the evil state of mind to think about doing this; no one should be able to do this…without some kind of consequence that fits the crime. But no punishment would be issued to Colonel Quaritch and his men. They would come back to base, grinning and congratulating themselves on a job well done.

Grace Augustine's cries echoed in my mind.


None of the soldiers paid any attention to their resistance, and proceeded to carry both her and Jake from the room. I saw Norm being dragged by three soldiers, and the expression on his face sent me into another wave of depression.

I was just sitting there, doing nothing to prevent this abomination.

I met Max's eye, and I might have been imagining it, but I swore that in that moment, both of us were thinking the exact same thing.

If we could get Jake, Grace, and Norm back into their Avatar bodies, then maybe we could find a way to bring down the RDA, a way to stop this monstrosity from going any farther than it already had.

I knew that we had to find a way to stop it all.

Now, since I'm cramped for time in this station as it is, I'm going to have to cut the whole description of exactly how Max and I got the three out of their prison, but let's just leave it at the fact that we never could have done it without the help of the spunky pilot Trudy Chacon. I wouldn't doubt that a lot of it was pure luck as well, but I like to think that it was all a result of our brilliant planning.

Anyway, we got to the hanger, me pushing Jake's wheelchair as quickly as I could down the hall, to save his energy for getting into the copter. It was then that Jake turned to Max and I, and thanked us.

"Thanks, guys. It'll be good having two people on the inside that I can trust. Be sure to keep in touch, okay? Let us know what's going on."

I remember Dr. Grace Augustine, walking through the hanger doors. I remember the fierce determination that glinted in her bright eyes as she turned to glance back at us. I smiled weakly, and I like to think that she smiled back, but I couldn't be sure.

Then the hanger doors closed, and we were alone in the hallway.

It would be the last time I ever saw Dr. Grace Augustine.

She died, later, from a gun wound made by Colonel Quaritch's furious shooting at Trudy's copter as they escaped. I never got to tell her how much I had grown to love her, as a mentor, as a friend.

When the hanger doors closed, Max and I made our way back to the medical quarters, only to find it in an uproar, people crying, people shouting.

I've always had an excellent memory, and so I can recall almost every detail of that day, of that day when I rebelled against the RDA.

I remember shutting it all out, and heading into that small link room, Max right behind me.

"Sara, what the hell do you think you're doing?"

"I need to help…somehow."

"Running off into that jungle isn't going to help!"

I remember looking at Max calmly. "So protecting Jake's human body while he is in Avatar form wont help, will it?"

Max had sputtered out excuses. "But that's miles and miles away! You'll never make it in time!"

I had grinned widely for the first time in days.

"We'll see. I just need you to get a really big metal box that I can unlock from the inside, and insist that one of the ships that is holding the foot soldiers that they need to put this below, in case of serious injury. And when the battle starts, I'll get out and find my way to the site from there. I even have a tracker that Norm gave me." I held up a small device that had a small map and a bunch of blinking red dots. Max's mouth was open, and his dark eyes were wide.

I had smirked, and patted his shoulder. "You can tell me I'm a genius after this is all over."

Smiling at him one last time, I had climbed into the unit, and I pulled the cover over me quickly. I heard Max muttering to himself as he pushed some buttons, and everything went blank as my mind linked with my Avatar.

I awoke once more in the shack, and this time I lay there for a moment, thinking. I had to wait a long time, but I could still move around and get used to moving in this body, since everyone was too occupied with the upcoming battle to be concerned with the Avatar training area.

I rolled over to put my feet on the floor, and stood up fluidly. I walked over to the clipped shut gate, and stared out at the early morning that was cool and clear.

Such depressing weather, not because it itself was dreary, but because it was the weather that was present before a whole new meaning to the word 'bloodshed' was created. It was sad, so many soldiers would die, and so many Na'vi would die. I felt indebted to be saddened by the life of human beings, and yet I also felt indebted to feel sad by the deaths of the Na'vi. It was all so different. I wished that I could go back to the world of black and white, loyal and disloyal, not all of this emotional 'in the between' stuff.

The hours passed slowly, and in that time I packed a pack full of supplies so I could survive out there for as long as I needed to for the battle, and after a moment, packed a large gun that looked dangerous and so unlike anything I would ever dream about using. I also strapped a large dagger to my waist. I knew that Pandora was a dangerous place, even for the Na'vi clans.

There were predators that were the size of dinosaurs, and these ones were much, much faster and more intelligent. If I wasn't armed, I would be taken apart in mere minutes. I hoped that most of the creatures would be wary of the battle going on, and as a result would be less likely to make an appearance.

I could only hope.

Max came in the next hour, with a short but wide metal box that had a few medical labels on the outside. I remember my tail twitching in hesitation, but then the sounds of soldiers coming out put all doubt from my mind, and I climbed in, tucking my tail tightly in behind me, and taking a deep breath even though Max had poked small, subtle holes so I could breath. The lid closed on me, and all was blackness, and I tried to keep my breathing as shallow as possible.

The rest I wish I could tell you – I might go into further detail on how truly terrifying it was for me to be locked in a fragile metal box for hours on end in some other entry – but as I said before, my petty details aren't important in the long run. I need to get to the point in my journey where everything went wrong, the part where my plan was changed completely.

I was cramped inside the box, in the cargo hold of the foot soldier ship, but what I didn't expect is that they needed to dump the cargo in order to make their ship lighter, so they could get out of there faster. And so when I felt myself hitting the water suddenly, I panicked, and started kicking the sides frantically.

I only realize now how dangerous it was for me to panic like that. If I had kicked the box at a different angle, I could have snapped my ankle, or even pushed the lock into position so I wouldn't be able to get out at all, leaving me to drown.

Luckily, none of those occurred.

Water was seeping into the box through the holes Max had punched for air, and I heard my harsh breathing in the choking tightness of the container. I finally kicked the door away, and water rushed in, throwing me off guard for a second before I instinctively pushed off, and into the open water of the river.

I kicked towards the surface, and felt the cool air engulf me as my head broke the surface. I gasped for breath, and grabbed a hold of the nearest root, and pulled myself onto it, gulping for air, and I felt my heart racing as I watched the metal box sink into the churning waters. I groaned at the state of my gun, which was now useless, and tossed it away into the brush, taking out my knife.

I remember the feeling as I looked around me, the lush taste of the air, so undisturbed, so tranquil.

I knew better.

With a sigh, I pulled out Norm's tracking device, and was thankful that the water hadn't damaged it. Thankful was an understatement, but let's not get into that.

I held the tracker up, and after a moment it caught a signal, but then, it blanked out. I smacked my hand against it, and coordinates came onto the screen, and I followed them.

It was the most frightening experience of my life, running through the forest, whether I lived or died based on the puny knife in my hand. I heard the screams of the Na'vi fighting, and suddenly I saw the battle, everything as vivid as if spotlights had been placed upon them.

Na'vi men, shooting their poison dipped bows, their cries as the bullets from RDA guns hit them, their six legged horses screaming as they galloped away. I jumped behind a tree, trying to block out the sounds of the dying. I had to get to the site where Jake's human body was, I had to protect it. If Colonel Quaritch found it, he'd kill Jake without batting an eyelash.

I blinked as I saw a familiar Na'vi running with a gun in his hands, his braid waving behind him, his yells adding to the chaos.


I gasped, and Norm seemed to sense my stare, because he looked over at me, his eyes widening impossibly wide. I remember his mouth shaping the sounds of my name.


His distraction cost him the upper hand, and suddenly he was sent tumbling to the ground. I yelled and ran over to him, as close to the ground as I could go. I pulled him into the safety of the brush.

He was gasping for breath, his arm clutching his wounded shoulder. "S-Sara, what the hell are you doing here?!"

"I came to protect Jake's human body. If they find it, he's screwed." I muttered, peeling Norm's fingers from his wound, and examining it. The bullet was still in there, and I needed pliers to get it out.

Norm was fading out; he had always been squeamish around blood, and I had slapped his face frantically.

"Norm, stay with me! You need to show me where the site is, c'mon." I helped him to his feet, and he groaned as his shoulder was jostled. He had been so scared, and I was scared too, but we managed to get to the site in the end, after about thirty minutes.

It was a secluded clearing, with the long trailer that held the link-units. Spellman suddenly went limp, and I yelled his name, but he was already gone, his mind transferred back into his human body.

I heard his human cries of pain in the trailer, and quickly dragged his Avatar over to the tree that was behind the trailer, shoving it under the roots for safekeeping.

It was almost funny, during the entire battle I was calm as you please, but inside I was filled with such suffocating terror that I was surprised I managed a full sentence after it was all over.

Norm came out soon after, with a gun and an oxygen mask on. He looked up at me.

"I'm going back out."

I nodded, and touched his head gently. "Be safe, okay?"

He nodded, and marched off into the trees, and I stood watching him for a moment.

This battle was changing all of us. I never would have thought to hide away in my Avatar body, in a box, no less. I never would have rebelled for the frightening Na'vi that haunted my nightmares. But I had, and there was no going back now, for any of us.

I stood in the middle of the clearing, staring up at the light filtering through the canopy, feeling as ancient as the trees that surrounded me. I was so different from that scared first year who had turned so red when being caught in the lab by Dr. Augustine that day, the girl who had no backbone until now. It was strange, whenever I was in this body I felt so much more assured and powerful. Being at least three feet taller than anyone else helped, but it was more than that, somehow.

Suddenly, a large machine strode into view, and saw a glint of a window before I felt a blinding pain in my right arm. I had been shot. I screamed, and saw the face of Colonel Quaritch smirking through the window. I saw no recognition in that face, so I assumed he didn't identify me as a human Avatar, just as a Na'vi. Both were bad. I felt my legs quivering as he made his way toward me, and I gripped the knife handle between my fingers.

He aimed his gun toward me, and I felt a loud hiss escape my teeth, my last act of defiance. I knew I was going to die.

But suddenly, I saw a loping creature heading toward us, and the Colonel was focused on it, and I took that opportunity to run. I ran as fast as I could, faster than I had ever run in my life.

Running made my arm hurt, and I don't know how long I ran for. I remember the time being skewed by the pain, bright crimson blood staining my fingers. I couldn't tell whether I was still standing after a while, and after a while I was in silence as I ran.

But finally, I felt my knees buckle under me, and I fell roughly on my shoulder. I was breathing harshly, my face covered in sweat. My arm throbbed and stung painfully, and every time I moved it, it flared with new pain. I lay there for a long time, seeing the light fade from the sky slowly, until the sky was a golden and crimson blur.

I waited to die, because I knew that the creatures would return, and I was a meal just begging to be devoured. I was helpless, and I wondered what it would feel like to die in this body. Would I wake up in my human body, back at the base? Or would they open up the unit to see that my human body was dead as well? What would happen?

I felt something warm and wet on my arm, and I pushed it away instinctively, annoyance seeping through the haze of pain. It touched my arm again, and I managed to sit up, pushing it away with both hands.

I opened my eyes to see that a large head of a creature was nudging me, and I screamed, pushing myself back hastily. It was one of those horse things, what had Jake called them? Oh yeah, direhorses. It was staring at me; it's long tongue coming out to lick my arm. I pushed it away again, and suddenly realized that someone was riding it.

It was a Na'vi warrior, but his features were unfamiliar to me, and I blinked to see him more clearly. His golden eyes glowed in the light of the fading sun. There wasn't a smile on his face, but it wasn't a frown either. He was just staring at me.

The Na'vi spoke in a low voice that seemed a part of the forest, and I recognized the dialect of the Na'vi. Dr. Augustine had tried teaching me, but I had only learned snippets of it. I understood enough to get the gist of what the man was saying.

He was asking if I was hurt, and if I was with the people of Jakesully.

I nodded furiously, blinking more rapidly, the haze settling in as my arm throbbed. I heard him dismount, and felt his large fingers examining my wound.

The warrior said something again, almost muttering it. I think he said that the wound was deep. It sure felt like it, so I didn't bother saying anything. My vision was slowly slipping into a gray fog, and the last thing I felt were rock hard arms scooping me up, and then I lost consciousness.

I woke up – still alive, and somehow in my human form – to the relieved faces of Max Patel and Norm Spellman.

The Na'vi succeeded in eliminating the RDA, and all the humans were being shipped back to Earth. Well, almost all the humans. Max, Norm, me, and the twenty scientists that had Avatars were allowed to stay. Norm's Avatar, as well as mine, were healing in the Avatar Facility, and would be fully functional in a day or so. I saw Jake Sully in his wheelchair a few hours ago, and felt a stab of pity, but only for a moment.

Jake was being transformed into one of them, like, the real deal.


But the even stranger thing was, that, they were offering to do the same to Norm and I. Not tonight, Jake told us, but they were giving us two days to decide. The rest of the Avatar drivers were somehow unworthy, and Norm had agreed in a heartbeat. But me…I was still deciding.

Should I become a Na'vi…forever?

Was it the right path to take?

That's my story so far, and now if you don't mind, I'm going to end my journal there for today, because I need to go to sleep. I doubt that I'll sleep much, but I'm going to try. I keep looking at Jake's wheelchair, which is leaning against the wall. It kinda reminds me of that day in the lab, my first year here. Whenever I look at that chair, I think about all the things I've overcome to be here today.

It's strange how random things like wheelchairs remind you of that kind of stuff, isn't it?

I have to stop writing before I go off on a whole other tangent…I tend to do that.

I'll just have to wait and see what tomorrow brings. I won't lie; I'm terrified. But hey, who ever said life here on Pandora was easy?

End of Entry 1