Disclaimer: you know the drill…


Zim's fury was unparalleled as he ran towards the Membrane residence as stealthily as he could. That Dib, he thought, he's going to pay for messing with the mighty Zim. When he got near to the house he dashed behind a trash can, observing the house and calculating the route of least resistance; he then climbed swiftly up the tree that stood near the second story window and vaulted in to Dib's room, facing the treacherous Irken-human-boy. "You…" he hissed, "You filthy worm! I give you a superior Irken form and this is how you repay me?!" he gestured down at himself.

Dib snickered as he scanned the results of his revenge proudly, Zim was human! His normally green skin was now a pale ivory color, he had glossy black hair with two cowlicks that imitated antennae, and his eyes were a soft magenta. He stood a bit taller than he was originally so his Invader uniform only came down to his knees while his pants stopped at his calves and his boots and gloves barely fit. Also, his PAK seemed to have rejected his human form because with a simple jarring movement, it fell to the ground with a clatter though he picked it up quickly and hugged it to his lithe form.

"I said you'd regret messing with Dib Whateveryourlastnameis (A/N: "Dib's wonderful Life of Doom") and now you do!" the short Irken grinned evilly, their positions reversed.

"But how?"

"Remember that remote link you established between out PAKs so that I could give you the information on Earth you wanted?" Zim nodded, "Well after a bit of research and development, I sent a virus into your PAK that made it generate a foreign DNA sequence much like the one you hit me with only faster acting! Then it injected you with it, turning you into the thing you hated the most, an 'inferior' human."

"Wait, you gave me the cure to your issue to get your revenge on me for doing that you why?" Zim looked confused by his own logic, "That makes no sense…"

"Well…y'see the truth is - the thing I did only worked on your cells, not mine." Dib stared at his boots sheepishly, "You'd have to have a sample of the original DNA-thingy to reverse engineer the cure for me…"

Zim smirked, "Like I'll give you that filthy Dib-thing…" He crossed his arms in defiance and then winced as he felt the human flesh rub together. "What even makes you think that I'd give you the cure in the first place?" His pretty face twisted into a cruel sneer.

"Because, I have the cure to turn you back into your normal egotistical Irken self." His tongue snaked out from his mouth as he spit venom-filled words towards his foe, "And until you cure me, you're stuck that way."

"Y-you filthy little---" Zim struggled for the right word no longer able to form the Irken words he wanted to scream, his human tongue thick and heavy in his mouth, "How a, I supposed to resume my mission if I cannot access my base or even resume a normal human life?! And I am pretty sure that my attire at the moment would be considered indecent even by human standards."

"Well…" he smiled, I have the upper hand here now Zim, "Seeing as you gave me temporary access to your base, I think if I hacked the computer mainframe, I could get it to recognize your DNA signature and voice code as you again. As for clothes-" clothes flew out of the boy's closet as he used his PAK's tentacles to find the right outfit for his helpless arch-enemy. "Here."

Zim held the items of clothing at arms length as if they would bite him. Draped over his arms were a pair of jeans, a t-shirt emblazoned with a 'Z?', a pair of gloves, and a pair of boots. "You expect me to wear this?"

"Yeah, why?" he flippantly looked over his shoulder as he readied himself for the day, "Unless you feel like explaining to Mrs. Bitters why you're in the partial nude…"

"Ew…." Zim slipped into the clothes (along with pair of briefs courtesy of Dib) and then made a face, "They smell like human…."

"Get used to it, everything you touch'll smell like human now." Dib activated his disguise and gave Zim a look, "You coming?"

Zim said nothing and followed him through the door and past a very confused Gaz.


That day, Skool was abuzz with chatter over Zim's looks:

"Look at his height!!!"

"His skin's not green anymore!"

"Wow, he looks almost normal!"

Zim dismissed all the questions with one excuse, "They found a cure for my chronic pinkeye and my green skin!" Most everyone bought it.


As much as Dib loathed being Irken, he loved having this power over Zim. When Skool let out, Zim followed the kid to his base, "You stay out here while I deal with the gnomes and the computer, GIR'll be out to let you know it's safe to come in."

There was a long pause then a green blur shot out the front door and tackled Zim, "i'm sorry master!!!!!! i didn't know it was youuuuuu~" he began to shriek.

"GIR….get off…of me…" Zim gasped, his newly found spleen rupturing under the weight of the little robot.

"okeeeeedokeeee!!!!!!!!!" he hopped away as Zim took a labored breath and he launched into another excited tirade, "master can come home now, the dib made the computer let you in again!"

So he kept his promise… he thought wearily, he must really want me to change him back…this is intriguing. I could use this to my advantage… "GIR, my human body needs to sleep. Wake me at six in the morning."

The robot's eyes glowed crimson, YES SIR MY MASTER!!!!!

Zim wearily crawled on to the couch and soon fell fast asleep.

End pt1


A/N: Yaaaaay!~ I finally got it done!!!!!