Goku's Grand Adventure
By Bunni Girl
The day started like any other day: Goku pigging out on too much food, Chichi yelling at him for eating so much food, Gohan trying to study (while eating an immense amount of food), and little Goten practicing martial art moves while, like his father and brother, eating a lot of food.
"Gokuuuuu!! That was for dinner!" Chichi screamed at her ignorant husband, starting to besiege on how his eating habits reigning overall.
Goku looked up. "But Chichiiiiiiii..." He whined.
"No." She cut him off, and started expressly pointing out her disagreement.
"Darn it, Goku, how many times do I have to say 'no'?"
Goku looked down at his fingers and closed one eye as he whispered numbers to himself. "..five..seven..um..twelve..Um.. I think the next number after twenty is how many.."
Chichi whapped him with her trusty cooking pan (available in supermarkets near YOU!) and grumbled walking away, muttering things about, "...nothing is sacred in my kitchen anymore.." and "I wonder if Bulma ever has this trouble.."
Goku looked after her then turned back, vacuuming his repast. Gohan looked between his parents and rolled his eyes, and continued studying.
Goten ran inside. "Dad, can I go to Trunks' house?"
"Sure, son!" Goku beamed between mouthfuls at his son that looked identical to himself.
Chichi stepped out of the kitchen waving her pan and a report card with thick red marks on it. "OH, NO YOU DON'T! SON GOKU, TELL HIM HE CAN'T GO ANYWHERE UNLESS HE BRINGS THIS SCIENCE GRADE BACK UP!"
All the Saiyajins in the household cringed.
"What did I say earlier?"
"NO GOKU!" Goku looked down, defeated. Goten copied his father's puppy dog look. "But Mooom-"
"Darn it! I had enough with the all these 'but's in the household.." Goten snickered.
Gohan and Goku looked at him questioningly.
He grinned. "Mom said 'butt'."
Goku roared in hilarious laughter, while Gohan, knowing better (and had learned from previous mistakes at not making his mother angry) kept his mouth shut.
Chichi's eye twitched.
Both father and son were kicked, or shall we say 'panned', out of the house, confused and befuddled.
Chichi shook her fist out of the doorway. "AND DON'T COME BACK UNTIL YOU HAVE AN APOLOGY, SON GOKU!" Goku looked down, sniffling.
A slam was his answer. It was clear that Chichi had denounced her husband.
"Soooo...what do we do now, Dad?" Goten asked as they flew to the one place that would take them and feed them without crying out in horror as their food was sucked dry.
Goku grinned. "Well, we can go visit Trunks, Vegeta, and Bulma. Don't worry, son. Your mother is just on her monthly. It'll be over as soon as the penguins fly south." Goten looked weirdly at his father and distanced himself a couple more inches from him. Goku kept grinning and looking ahead.
"Goku! Goten! What a nice surprise!" Bulma beamed at the two.
Goku and Goten grinned simultaneously.
"Hey, Bulma! Chichi kicked us out.."
Goten spoke up. "'Cause we laughed because she said 'butt'." As soon as he said that the could-pass-as-twins Saiyajins cracked up again. Bulma rolled her eyes. "Whatever, guys. Come on in. I'm fixing lunch right now."
Goku made 'oh yeah' motion with his leg and arm. Goten copied him and they fell into laughter once again.
Strolling after Bulma, Goku reconized Trunks muttering at the table as he munched on a PB&J sandwich. Goten had already joined his best friend and the two got into a friendly conversation with the occasional dirty joke thrown in whenever they thought Bulma wasn't in earshot.
"Soooo..." Goku made himself comfortable at the island counter, watching Bulma make sandwiches. Bulma sighed as she pasted peanut butter to the bread slice.
"You wanna know where Vegeta is right?"
"Upstairs." A jerk of her thumb towards to ceiling. A spinning chair that fell to the floor was seen as the faint outline of Goku through the dusty air was seen rushing up the stairs.
Bulma shook her head. "Saiyajins.."
Vegeta was admiring himself in the mirror, flexing his muscles, clad in spandex apparel, and making kissy noises at his reflection. "Man, you are one handsome prince of Saiyajins, Vegeta!" He grinned. He never noticed Goku behind him.
"Yeah, Vegeta, all the girls want you." Vegeta winked at himself. "But you only want the Woman." He chuckled. "Especially after last night's- AHHH!" He turned around and shrieked in mid-sentence. "KAKAROTTO! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!"
Goku made a sheepish wiggling of his fingers. "Hey, Vegeta. Hope I'm not interrupting."
Vegeta coughed, looking away to hide the distinct pink that covered his nose. "Important? Whatever gave you the impression that I was doing something in the first place? I'm just...er.." Vegeta's eyes darted around wildly and picked a random object. "Just..." He looked down and pronounced the word carefully. "Trying out this new do-it-yourself-hair-straightener! Yeah, just what I was doing. Nothing you can say otherwise Kakarotto! I wasn't checking myself out in the mirror!"
"Um...okay, Vegeta." Goku grinned. "You weren't then. Can we spar?"
"Idiot! Can't you see that I'm busy?" He stroked the do-it-yourself kit box absently.
"Cool, can I help?"
"Er..." Goku got the impression that he was intruding on sacred territory with the Saiyajin Prince. "Okay, Vegeta. I'll just be downstairs if you decide to change your mind.." He turned and accidently walked into the dresser causing it to fall down, which caused a chain reaction of a lamp flying into the air, slamming into the window, making a cat screech and jump fifty feet in the air and running in the room, ripping stuff up, causing a flurry of pillows to fly around frantically.
Vegeta growled. "You oaf! You inept, bungling, stupid, idiotic, dumb, irksome, pest of a-" It was too late. Goku had already begun to recede out of the room. "Stupid Kakarotto!" Vegeta called after him and looked at the mess in his wife and his room and grumbled. "The Woman is gonna kill me.." Then a visible lightbulb came over his head and he had a sneaky look. "Or..maybe not.. Not unless I can clean the place up before she comes back." With a dark chuckle he set off to do his deed.
Goku sighed heavily. His gainful opportunity down the drain, just like that. Goku grumbled. Stupid do-it-your-self-hair-kit.. He had begun to have some misgivings about laughing at Chichi. Now he was bored out of his mind.
If only Chichi hadn't said the word 'butt'. At the rememberence of that, he snorted with laughter, scaring some workers of Capsule Corp away with his sudden mood change.
Then, as if struck with an ingenious idea, which he had been, Goku yelled and brought his two fingers to his forehead and used his infamous instaneous transmission to leave to his unknown destination.
Half a world away, in a mystic world named Holand, Goku reappeared. Blond, blue-eyed people looked at him strangely before grinning and singing, "Ja! The Aliens have cume finally to send us back to the mathership! Soon we shall be free!" in their strange accents. Goku scratched his head before shrugging and walking in search.
"Now where would I be if I were Dutch chocolate...?" Goku wondered outloud, not deterring any of the locals from their singing.
"Hmm... I know!" Goku ran into a random shop and was instantly shooed out.
"But Mr. Dutch Shopkeepeeeeeeer... I-"
"Dombo! I said NO!" With that the shopkeeper went back inside and locked the door, just in case Goku tried to break in. Goku pouted and walked on, running into random shops, getting the same reaction over and over. "Dombo!" "Eikel!" "Galbak!"
Finally Goku had enough. "NOOOOOO! MY NAME IS SON GOKU! NOT DOMBO, EIKEL, OR GALBAK!" All of the villagers looked at him weirdly before all pointing at him and screaming in laughter.
Goku grumbled, "It isn't funny.. my name is nothing to be messed with.."
Walking on, he stopped in front of a shop and grinned. Ah, his quest would come to a close at last. Walking in, he looked around the chocolate and cheese shop. He walked up to the shopkeeper, a nice plump lady with grey hair and brown eyes, humming a pretty tune as she made caramel apples. Goku kept himself from drooling. Caramel...
"Um..excuse me, Miss Dutch Shopkeeper? I-"
"Yes, I know. The package is on the counter."
"Just what you ordered."
"But I didn't-"
"Go on and hurry. Your father needs this."
"DON'T MAKE ME SAY IT AGAIN, JOHNY!" The old woman turned around and looked scary as she glared violently at Goku. Then she forsook him as she gave him a nasty glare towards Goku, who 'eeped' and ran out of the shop.
Goku blinked and looked at the package to took hastily. Man, that lady could pass as Chichi's aunt or grandma or something..
Goku looked down at the bag again. Maybe this would suffice as a substitute..besides the lady did say take it. Satisfied with himself, and sure to get a good meal in his tummy soon, Goku instant transmissioned home, compressing the bag inside his gi.
A young man around twenty walked in, looking the same age as Goku and messed up hair similar to Goku's, and smiled at the Shopkeeper.
"Morning, Hilda." The graying old woman, Hilda, grunted.
"What do you want?" Confusion clouded his features.
"I'm here for the package for Father. You know.. the one I ordered over the phone? You know how Father's daily trips to the restroom have been getting stressful so we got the laxatives.."
Shock and fear came over Hilda as she waddled out of the shop screaming. "AAAAAH! JOHNY, MISTER, DOMBO, COME BACK! COME BAAAAACK! YOU HAVE THE WRONG PACKAGE!!" Hilda sobbed, dousing her beautiful makeup with tears. The young man sighed heavily and went to the phone to dispatch a message to his father. Apparently Hilda had forgotton to put on her looking glasses again.
Goku grinned as Chichi let him in, beaming. "Awww... Goku how could I have kicked you out?" She gave him a loving look. "Especially after this thoughtful gift! How did you know Belgium chocolates were my favorite?"
Goku grinned. "Just call it a hunch."
Chichi cooed at him and shooed him inside the kitchen. "Go on and eat all you want, sweetie. I'll just go upstairs and put away these chocolates."
It had to be a dream. Goku mutely wondered. It just had to be. Mountains of cascading food was at his disposal, and he realized he was famished! As soon as he was done, Chichi, who had come down fifteen minutes earlier, groaned and held her tummy.
"Goku... I don't feel so good.." Gurgling was heard and Chichi's face was scrunched up as she rushed upstairs to the nearest bathroom. Goku had a clueless expression as usual, then he shrugged.
Like he had said earlier, Chichi would get over her monthly as soon as the penguins flew south for the winter. Hearing some squawking outside, Goku poked his head out and gasped.
Goku grinned. Ah, things would get finally back to normal.
"SON GOKU , GET YOUR MONKEY BUTT UP HERE RIGHT NOW!"
Goku looked crestfallen. Maybe not..
Even though I could've sworn I posted this here before, it must have been deleted by accident when was going through its "renewal." Just a funny little thing I did for Freshman English back in 2002, guys. The underlined words were my words. ^_~ Umm... Hope everyone got a kick out of this. ^-^ Who knows? Maybe even a sequel will pop out of this. Don't own Dragonball Z.
dombo, johny: basically a Dutch slur word for 'really really stupid'.
eikel: not inclined to say in a PG story
galbak: who knows?