Title: Lily

Rating: R

Characters/Pairings: Jack/Will, Gibbs, OC

Warnings: m/m, angsty, incredibly brief mention of violence

A/N: We never hear about Jack's mother - or father until AWE - and for some reason, I like to think of him having had a close relationship with her (and then AWE came out...) so this was the result of me playing around with that thought. Date posted elsewhere: 12/31/06



It made no sense. Why would the ship dock for only one night and in such a tiny town on an equally petite island off the coast of Tortuga? The wind and weather was on their side, the traffic was due to be high in the area they were originally headed for, but instead, the Black Pearl went the other way.

Will Turner was more than a little frustrated with his captain, yet none of the other crewmembers seemed aggravated.

As the sun was rising, the ship dropped anchor and the crew went ashore. Will stumbled off with Gibbs and the two observed a slow moving Jack Sparrow amble away from the small number of buildings present. There was a difference about him; it was obvious that he was not his normal, clever self. The melancholy look on his face provided even more evidence.

"What's the matter with him?" Will questioned.

"Today's the day," Gibbs replied simply.

"What day?"

"You want to know more about Jack Sparrow?"

"Why do you say that?"

"Don't be a fool, Will. I've seen the way you look at him; hell, everyone has, lad."

Will's cheeks flushed a little from being called out. "Yes, I want to know more," he said quietly.

"Well then….." Gibbs batted his hand outward in the captain's direction.

"You're saying I should follow him?"

"I'm sayin' you should do what ya want. Usually the only way to find out is to see for yourself."

Will waited a minute before hurrying after Jack. When he found the pirate, he was standing completely immobile near the center of a cemetery gazing down at the pathetic plaque of the grave he was next to. The former blacksmith watched at a distance from the ramshackle fence that encompassed the decent-sized plot of land. He was not sure what he was expecting, nor if he learned anything, but he stared at Sparrow's back for several moments until he at last turned around to return to the town.


Seven hours passed before Jack left the site. Will spotted him from the front of the tavern he stood outside of.

"Jack," he called, but Sparrow showed no signs that he had heard.

He started to go to the man, but Gibbs halted him.

"I don't think you should follow this time."

"Why?"

"Just let him be alone right now."

It was late in the evening before Will could no longer resist the urge to seek out his Captain.

He went aboard the Pearl and quietly opened the doors to the captain's quarters. Cautiously, he stepped inside, shut the entrance behind him, and discovered Jack leaning against the table and downing a bottle of rum.

"Jack?" he asked warily.

Sparrow finished swallowing and set the container aside. "Yes, William?" His voice was flat, devoid of any emotion. It was quite the contrast from his typical tone.

"Is everything alright?"

"It's fine."

Will hesitated and then inquired, "Do you want me to leave?"

Sparrow looked at him directly and his eyes were filled with an anguish that made Will cease to breathe for a second. "I don't care."

Jack sauntered into the adjacent room and after a period, Will went in. The pirate was resting on his side on the bed, facing the wall the furniture was pushed against. He stared unblinkingly at the wood and was utterly still.

Will had no idea what to do. The decision was made for him once his feet began shuffling toward the bed. He laid himself next to his captain and after much uncertainty, he went through with placing an arm around Jack's body and moved closer against him. Sparrow stiffened at the touch, but soon relaxed into the embrace. He let out a quivering sigh and closed his eyes.

"What is it, Jack?" Will whispered into the captain's dark hair.

"Lily," was the barely audible answer.

What happened next caught Will off guard.

Jack trembled in the younger man's arms and wept.

There was rapid breathing and the softest sounds as the tears cascaded from Jack's eyes. Will rubbed his arm soothingly and then tightened his grip on the male. He rocked Sparrow gently as he tried to make sense of the utter vulnerability he was being allowed to witness of his captain.


Will did not know how much time had passed before Jack gained control of himself and sat up. The former blacksmith did the same and observed the pirate wipe his face free of the water streaks. When he looked at Will, the young male felt shattered. The kohl that had outlined Sparrow's now reddened eyes was smeared in various directions, and his features were clouded heavily with intense sadness. Nevertheless, he smiled a little at his crewman in hopes that he could fool him.

"Jack-"

"I'm fine, Will. That was just a moment of weakness that won't ever happen again."

"I know what today is," Will lied.

Sparrow's mouth fell open slightly and an expression of disbelief mixed with betrayal came over him. "How do you know? Who told you?"

"I…..That's not important-"

"It was Mr. Gibbs, wasn't it?"

"No, Jack-"

"You have no right to know-"

"I don't, Jack! Alright? I don't. I want you to tell me!"

"Why would I do that?"

"I think I'm entitled to knowing why my captain is feeling dejected and pulling into a town where there's nothing!"

Jack grabbed Will's shirt and leaned close to him. His eyes were lit with an angry fire.

"There's not nothing here, mate," he growled ominously. "There's something."

Will was completely calm as he replied, "What's here then?"

Jack shook his head and smirked. "You don't understand, so it doesn't matter."

"Who is she, Jack?"

The older man's eyes were fixed on him once again, and he appeared helpless.

"Who's Lily?"

Jack swallowed and could only stare at Will for a few seconds more before he covered his face with his hands and exhaled a shaky breath. It was somewhat heartbreaking to behold Sparrow overwhelmed by another set of tears, but Will found himself wholly taken with the pirate as well in such a state of exposure.

His mind seemed to be a step behind as he shifted himself toward Jack, removed the hands from his visage, and kissed him chastely. There was no reluctance; Sparrow returned the act completely. While the crewman continued to savor Jack's lips, his arms slipped around the man's form. Jack did the same and lay down on his back, bringing Will on top of him as he did so.

There was the notion in the back of Will's thoughts that what he was doing was wrong – benefiting from Sparrow's fragile emotional condition was wrong – however, it did not stop him from continuing.

The belts and sash came undone from Jack's waist easily, as did Will's, and his vest was slipped off of him to fall to the floor nearby. He took off Will's slowly and rose up again when the young man gripped his shirt. Will removed the garment, dropped it to the side, and he ceased the contact of their lips as the tattoo on the left side of Jack's chest above his heart caught his interest.

Lily.

He looked questioningly at it and brushed his fingers over the ink only to have Jack lightly grab his wrist and pull it away. Will nodded in understanding and allowed Jack to rid him of his shirt. They worked slowly at eliminating one another of their trousers, and Will's head spun when he gazed wantonly at the naked being beneath him. His palms caressed various parts of Sparrow, eliciting the faintest sounds of pleasure mixed with sorrow. It snapped him back to the truth of the situation, and he retracted his wandering hands.

"I can't do this," he spoke quietly as he looked into Jack's grieving eyes.

"Please," Jack whispered as water drops continued to leak from his amber orbs. "Please…..Don't stop. I need it. Please."

Will swallowed, debated silently for a moment with himself, and at last responded, "Alright."

His mouth took Sparrow's with his once more, and the captain began to quiver. Jack blindly opened the drawer of the small table next to the bed, rummaged around for lubricant, and presented it to Will when he found it.

It was not long before Will started to penetrate the welcoming body under him.

Jack's legs wrapped around the young man as Will inched inside of him. He sighed, whimpered, and closed his eyes. His arms went above his head in total surrender, giving the crewman access to his entire body without hindrance. Will thrust upward gently and repeated the action leisurely several times until he settled on a steady pace that aroused frequent moaning from Jack. He bent down to suck fervently on the pirate's smooth neck as one of his hands groped the slender torso. It ventured below Jack's waist to grasp the man's stimulated member. Sparrow groaned and arched up into the touch. Will stroked and handled him with precision as his own rhythm gained momentum.

After several long moments of intensity, Will became still and climaxed within Jack, who spilt himself shortly after. They panted for breath and shook from the lingering feelings of ecstasy. Jack finally gazed at his crewman, and his expression troubled Will. The young male could not discern whether Sparrow felt any better or not; whether their shared closeness had averted the pirate's attention from his despondency or not. When he pulled away from Jack, he received some sort of answer.

Sparrow shifted to lie on his side with his back to Will, let out a quaking breath, and wiped his cheeks. He said nothing, causing Will to feel as if he were being ignored and forgotten.

Will rested beside him and stared aimlessly at the ceiling. As he drifted to sleep, he knew Jack was crying, despite the pirate's attempts to hide it.


The sun's rays poured into the room as morning dawned. Will had gotten dressed and seated himself in a chair across from the bed. He observed Jack sleeping tranquilly on his side facing him; one hand near his face, dreadlocks splayed in various directions about him, and the sheet had fallen to reveal his bare upper half.

Gibbs entered and glanced from Jack to Will in amusement.

"Got to know him real well, I see," he said quietly with a grin.

Will glared at him and responded, "I know nothing more of him than I did before." He paused for a period and then continued. "Whatever happened is incredibly painful for him. It's……It's hard to watch. Do you know who he's talking about when he says the name Lily?"

"He told you her name?"

"Yes, but nothing more than that."

Gibbs sighed. "I shouldn't show you, but come here."

He led the way into the main area of the quarters and went to the cabinet at the far side of the room. Will waited next to the circular table as Gibbs moved the wood piece forward slightly, knelt to the ground, and reached behind it. He retrieved several pieces of parchment and a leather-bound book and placed them on the table.

"Looks like he took all his letters this time," he said casually. "He writes 'em sporadically over the course of the year and then takes 'em to read to her. He doesn't know that I know where he puts all of this. Everythin' you want to know, you'll find in these. I highly recommend you put it back before he wakes up, for both our sakes."

He turned and exited as Will sat down and picked up one of the papers. He glanced over it quickly before putting it aside to open the book. It was a journal, he discovered, and the entries were dated over fifteen years ago. He paused on one and started to read.

The bleeding has finally stopped, though the terrible pain has not gone. I have found it rather difficult to move my arm without causing some sort of discomfort, but I do not regret my action whatsoever.
He returned home in another one of his rages, though worse than any I have known. I was in bed when I heard her cry out, and immediately I went running. He hit her violently, threw her to the floor, then picked her up and did it again. I had to protect her; just like the many times previous.
I ran at him and shoved him to the ground. We fought for awhile, until he brought out a knife. I did not even see it. It was sunk into my flesh in seconds. She came to my aid by knocking him out with a pan.

"Oh lord," Will whispered. He rubbed his face and turned to another page.

I did it. I persuaded her to leave. She cannot be harmed anymore by the cruel bastard. She is bound for England with a hefty amount of currency to help her make a better life. I know she is afraid for me, being left behind with him, but she need not worry. I am set to become a member of the Royal Navy in seven day's time; I will not be with him long.
I will visit her often; I swore to it. She is the only woman I love, and the only woman I will ever love.

He closed the journal, took a deep breath, and let it out slowly. With a trembling hand, he took up one of the parchments and looked over it.

England is a magnificent place, but it certainly is not as wonderful as it could be since I do not have you to share it with. I think about you everyday, and I am greatly worried about you. Your last letter troubled me deeply. To think of what would have happened if the bullets had passed through the other side of your chest makes tears come to my eyes every time. Promise me you will not be one of the men they bring back slain.

The signature at the bottom was simply "Love you more than any, Lily." This was not helping much in his mind. He picked another one, which was extremely short, and spoke the words aloud.

"My dearest, precious Jack,
It has become worse. Please, please hurry. I am afraid to face it alone. I need you. I dislike being selfish in asking you to leave your duties urgently, but there is not much time, I fear. I need you here with me. Please hurry.
Love you more than any and with all of my heart, Lily."

Will felt as if he were at a dead end. He was still unsure of who this woman was. The next letter he chose was written by neither Jack nor Lily. It gave him the answer he had been searching for.

Captain Jack Sparrow of the British Royal Navy,

It grieves me immensely to have to report that your mother, Lily Sparrow, has passed on. The typhoid claimed her early in the morning on the fifth of November.

The parchment fell from his grip as he became unable to read anymore.

Jack had not made it in time.

Will's eyes filled with water, and he wiped the droplets frantically away when they started to trickle down his cheeks. He had wanted so much to learn of what plagued Jack, but after having his confusion put to rest, part of him wished he had not found out at all.

The sound of movement from the other room made Will stop breathing for a second before he sprung to action. He attempted to be silent as he gathered up the journal and letters, fled to the cabinet, set them behind it where Gibbs had gotten them, and moved the piece of furniture back to its original spot. He stood next to the table just as Jack strolled out of the bedroom completely dressed.

"Morning, Jack," he greeted kindly. His heart was racing even though everything had been returned.

Jack smiled warmly, and all evidence of any affliction was completely gone. "Good morning, Will. You're up early, aren't you?"

Will shrugged and shook his head a little. "No, not-not really. Did you sleep well?"

"Not so bad. You?"

"Same."

Jack was obviously somewhat uncomfortable. He crossed to Will, looked at his hands for a moment, and at length gazed at the young man once again.

"Listen….William……Last night-"

"It's alright, Jack. I understand. And I understand if you don't wish to tell me about…..her. It's private, and you're entitled to privacy, and……Just know I'm here if you need me, Jack."

Jack nodded and his smile broadened. "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

The captain inhaled a breath and said cheerily, "Well! I, for one, am ready to head out. Let's see if the crew's returned, ay?"

Will followed Sparrow out the door, and the Black Pearl was soon on her way to the open sea.

As Will observed the island fade into the distance, he said with a small grin, "Lily Sparrow, you needn't worry about him now. I'll watch over him with you."