A/N: Okay, this is my very first Twilight story, and it's kind of a gift to my Twi-hard (at least in fan fiction) friend cplust. She wanted me to write her a ExB story, so I did. But I made Edward a cheater, and she doesn't like that. Nyeah lol
Okay, this story is going to be written almost backwards. This first chapter is the end, and the rest of the story will be the beginning. You'll have to read it to understand. But I'm kind of really excited for it.
Hopefully I do it justice.
Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight. But if I could, I'd own Jackson Rathbone J
"So, this is it, then?" I ask, staring into his eyes and wondering what the hell just happened. I feel winded, betrayed, and emotionally lost. What does one say when they realize that 13 years of friendship and love is being thrown away because the person you trusted to love you more than anything in this world is in love with another?
"Yeah, I don't know what else to say, Bella. You have your ideas, I have mine. I just don't feel that way about you anymore." Edward's face is resigned. I'm sure mine must mirror his. Our emotions almost always are in sync. We are almost always in sync.
At least, I had thought so, before today.
Four hours ago.
Edward walked into the house, threw his keys on the bowl inside the door, kicked his shoes off, and walked straight to the fridge for a beer. Like he did everyday for the last five months.
Honestly, the routine was so routine that Bella didn't even smell the stench of fermented crap anymore. It was like their own version of potpourri.
Which is probably why Alice hadn't been over in three months.
And why Bella's lips hadn't touched her husband's in two.
"Hey, honey," Edward said, leaning down to plant a kiss in Bella's hair, only his lips didn't even make it that far before he gave up the effort and walked into the living room.
Bella followed him, and stood leaning against the doorjamb. "When did you stop loving me?"
Edward's eyes snapped up from his perusal of the channel guide to stare at her in shock. "What? Who said I didn't love you anymore? You're my wife, Bella."
"Am I?" Bella crossed her arms and refused to cry over the love she spent thirteen years cultivating. "Then why is it that every time you come home from work, you smell like Chanel No.5?"
Edward rose from his place on the couch, slamming his beer bottle onto the table. "What does Kate have to do with this?"
Bella laughed dryly, "Well, Edward, maybe if you listened to yourself, you'd understand. We don't even talk anymore." She pushed off from the wall and dropped herself into the armchair. Bella didn't want to fight with Edward. So he slept around. He left her five months ago, anyway, so it wasn't even like she felt cheated on. Really, they should have filed for divorce when it all happened. But Edward insisted that they were forever.
Bella knew differently then, and she sure as hell knew differently now.
"Bella, baby, where is all this coming from? I thought you were making me lasagne for supper?" he asked, sniffing the air but not coming up with anything remotely Italian.
She looked at him like he had just grown three heads. "What the hell, Edward? I accuse you of sleeping with another woman and you ask me where the supper is?" She gave him the finger. It was a childish move, and at 25 she felt stupid for doing it, but her resolve to not get angry was being thrown out the window very rapidly.
"C'mon, just go make the lasagne and we can have a conversation over supper. I'm sure we can find something to talk about." Edward sat back down and took a swig of his drink.
Bella laughed. Cause, seriously, what other choice did she have? Crying wasn't an option anymore. Her tear ducts had dried up months beforehand. And Edward had never responded well to tears. He would clam up and pretend they never existed.
"Edward, just answer the question. Do you love me anymore?" It was so simple. Such an easy, yes or no question. The problem was, she still loved him and she knew he had no real feelings for her anymore.
He walked away, not even bothering to give her a glance. Walking into the kitchen, he opened the fridge and rummaged a little before standing back up and grinning at her through the kitchen door. "How do you even make lasagne, babe? There's a reason you do all the cooking, you know."
That was the last straw. She couldn't hold it in anymore.
"ARE YOU FUCKING LISTENING TO ME?"
Edward stopped and stared at her, a room and a hallway away, his mouth opening and closing. "You've… uh… never raised your voice like that before."
"Well, then I guess it's about fucking time I started, ain't it?" She laughed derisively, her feet swinging up to rest on the coffee table. Edward might have thought she looked comfortable and relaxed, if her body wasn't as stiff as a board and her eyes weren't so wild.
"Answer the fucking question, Edward. What is so hard?"
He tried. He thought about it, he thought of everything he used to love about her, her hair, her laugh, her smile. Her love for all things photography. Her unusual knack for making the perfect dish every time.
But then his mind drifted to Kate, to Leah, and to Rosalie, his brother's wife whom he may or may not have had a drunken one night stand with five months ago. No one knew about her, of course, but every single time he laid eyes on her now he felt this slight pull, this twitching, that he never felt for Bella anymore. Even conversation about the weather annoyed him when it came to Bella. It was just so much easier being drunk.
"No… no, I guess not."
Those four little words broke Bella's heart. "Oh." She didn't know what else to say. She didn't even know what to feel. She had known he was sleeping with other woman for awhile now, she could smell their perfume. It wasn't as if he had ever made an attempt to hide it from her.
But she had hoped. She had prayed. She had begged on her hands and knees for a miracle. For him to forget everything that had happened five months ago and to move on with their lives as husband and wife. They were married, for fucks sake!
"Fine. Get your things."
Edward looked at her, confused. "What do you mean? We're married, Bella, this is my apartment just as much as it is yours." By the look on his face he honestly hadn't expected her to throw him out so fast. Maybe he was praying for a miracle, too. But she wouldn't give it to him. She didn't think she had it left in her to care.
"I can't. Not tonight. Please, just get your things and go away."
When she looked back up, he was nodding his head. He drank the rest of his beer silently, as fast as he could, and then walked to their bedroom.
Edward looks as if he wants to say one last thing, but I am too scared of what might come out of his mouth. Thinking fast, I reach up and kiss him with everything that I have, but Edward doesn't react. Not that I expected him too.
"Yeah, this is it." I answer my own question and finally my eyes turn to sadness and betrayal.
It is in these last few moments, these spare glances that we have of each other, that Edward smiles. "But I'll miss you."
And with that, Edward opens the door and walks out of our apartment, and my life.
A/N: So what did y'all think? The chapters will follow this same format, present tense opens and closes (all Bella's POV), and in the middle will be flashbacks written in 3rd person past tense. If it's confusing, I'm sorry J
Please review, I eat them for lunch!