It's nothing new really. He's used to living under Dick Casablancas's room, him and some girl every night, intoxicated and probably technically incapable of consent, every night, groan, pop, moan, yell, pop, crackle, lather, rinse repeat.

Lather rinse repeat.

Repeat repeat repeat.

Repeat repeat repeat repeat repeat repeat repeat repeat repeat...

Not many people wonder how they became so different from their sibling and know the answer, hey?

It's wrong, sickdirtybadwrong, hearing them move and groan up there. Nononono, stop, stop it, it's wrong. Words, useless, always useless – the world doesn't believe in words. The world believes in hands and liquid on your skin (and it won't dry, won't ever dry), the world believed in a plan, in a cliff and a bus, in blood and death.

But never words.

It takes a few moments for him to know the moan, all light and breathless, vapid, empty – oh god. He knows the girl and he knows the moan and he finds himself on his knees in the bathroom, slouched over the toilet bowl.

It's wrong and twisted, but he knowsknowsknows and Dick can't touch her, he can't, because he knows her, knows her blood and all those other nasty liquids that come from it. He gives the bowl every last bit of food he's had for hours, and he doesn't want to give, he can'tcan'tcantcan't give, so it takes, takes and takes and takes until he's sitting there, desperate to breathe.

He wobbles his way out of the bathroom at the same time she shakes her way out of Dick's room. She gives a tiny airated gasp when she sees him, gasp, moan, more, no, it's okay, stop, stop, stopstopstopstopstopst-

"Beaver... are you okay?"


"Oh god, oh... Beaver, god, please don't tell my dad about this, he'd like, kill me – please tell me you won't, he'd-"

"I won't tell," don'tdon'tdont'dontdon'twhynotdon'tdon't. "I barely even see your Dad, so..."

She looks relieved. "Thankyou... Uh, bye, Beav..."

Beav. Beaver. Always Beaver.

"See you."

He drags himself back into the bathroom, slumped over the sink now, gasping and wheezing, needing air in his lungs, needingneedingneeding but nobody cares what he needs.

He goes toward the shower, turning the water on boiling searing piercing hot, crawling in fully clothed, desperate to get the liquid off, desperate to feel dry. He comforts himself with however Dick is going to break Gia's heart.