My second Twilight fanfiction. Here's a breif summary of what's due to happen. Six months after Edward leaves Bella, she's a mess and there's a huge hole in her heart. Very New Moon zombie, except Jacob isn't around to help her. Elsewhere, the Cullen family are miserable and less lively. As Edward is not around, Alice decides to look into Bella's future anyway; knowing that seeing her happy would put the family in peace. However, Bella is certainly depressed. What will the Cullens (minus Edward) do to try and repair the hole in her heart?
Disclaimer- The characters and locations belong to the fantastic Stephenie Meyer.
Chapter One: Forever
Bella Swan lived for the happiness of others. Her own joy, life and laughter no longer mattered. It didn't even exist. For the benefit of her father, Charlie, Bella woke up every morning, made breakfast before going to school in her old, red truck. When she returned home in the afternoon, it was for his hope that she ate dinner and did her homework before going to bed.
But, Bella Swan was also dead on the inside. Her mind was lost, dreaming about the life she had once had. Her heart was stolen, given to the young man who didn't want her anymore.
Bella Swan had no friends. Not talking, not focusing, not socialising; everybody else simply glanced past her as though she wasn't there. She was all but invisible to them. After time, even the teachers asked no questions, fully aware that the response would only be a longing, lost stare.
For her mother, Bella Swan answered her emails, often replying with one word sentences. She would read the journal like narratives of her mother's day, not caring or even taking in what was going on.
Bella Swan was like a zombie.
In the six months after being left, abandoned, in the forest, Bella Swan had not recovered. On the contrary, she had gotten worse. Bella had trashed almost all of her cds; she would never be in the lounge room when the television was turned on. She would stay away from anything that reminded her of him.
Him. The one she had pledged her love to. The one she had hoped to spend time with forever. The one who had captivated her since the very first time she had looked into his face. They had already gone through great things together; they had defied death from the hands of a sadistic and menacing tracker. But, Bella Swan meant nothing to him. She had been abandoned in the middle of a forest, having to wait for hours in the rain before being found by Sam Uley, from the reservation.
Love, life, meaning. To the eye of Bella Swan, those were gone forever.
Alice Cullen was miserable. She was sitting on the sofa, watching the TV screen as Jasper and Emmett plated on the Wii half heartedly. She could easily tell that Emmett was winning; Jasper was just idly pressing the buttons without much thought at all.
But, Alice Cullen was also feeling guilty. She was the one who had insisted on having the extravagant birthday party and had been persistent in stating that everyone must attend. She had been the one to set up millions of glass decorations in every place thinkable. The glass, which ultimately, cut into Bella's skin and left her bleeding in a house full of vampires.
The party which had ended in disaster was the same party that changed the lives of the Cullen family forever. Alice's party. She had six months worth of memories of Carlisle burying himself in his own grief; Esme crying silent, tearless sobs about the daughter she had left behind. Alice could tell that Emmett's jokes had lost their humour and even Rosalie appeared to miss having a human in her life. Alice's sister found comfort in being around somebody who could live a life considered 'normal.'
And Jasper? Alice's husband was living in his own pool of self blame. Every time he saw a human being; Jasper would flinch and look away. No matter how many times Alice tried to tell him that the fault was completely hers; Jasper would always respond in the same sad manner.
"You never did anything wrong Alice", he would say. "Nobody else tried to take a snap at Bella. Only me."
Alice Cullen couldn't change his mind; he was absolutely certain.
Alice did not even know where her brother, Edward was. After the horrible day, no one had seen or heard from him. Alice could only see the fleeting images of a confused and undetermined future.
However, Alice was surprised that nobody else had yelled at her about the party yet. Even after six months of moping, gloom and vampire depression; somebody was still yet to realise that it was Alice's fault and scream. Or push her through a wall. Out a window.
Alice Cullen wouldn't have minded. In fact, she would have been delighted.
Alice Cullen had thrown the party that tore her best friend out of her world. Forever.
Charlie Swan watched as his daughter died before his very eyes. Not in a physical sense, but emotionally. Mentally. Psychologically.
He had to be careful around her. Just one wrong word could send his daughter into a slump; crashing to the floor and lying there trembling for hours.
Charlie Swan had waited six months for his daughter to improve. He was still waiting for her to lose the emptiness in her eyes and the distant longing of her gaze. Charlie had tried everything to get life breathing into his daughter. Sending her to Florida? Charlie had been unwilling to see her go but his daughter reacted with so much heat; the idea became unthinkable. Admit her to hospital? Charlie did not like that idea one bit; besides, he was perfectly aware of how much Bella hated hospitals.
Also, hospitals reminded her of him. The boyfriend. Or more specifically, the boyfriend's father which caused Bella to be reminded of him.
If there was anything he could wish for, Charlie Swan wanted his daughter to be happy. Or even, not...dead. Charlie hoped that one day she could wake up in the morning, have a slight smile, go to school, gossip with friends; pretty much do something that was NORMAL!
Charlie's daughter was not normal. Of course, Bella had never been an ordinary child but still; barely eating, drinking or talking was behaviour on the borders of humanity.
Charlie Swan loved his daughter unconditionally. He had cancelled fishing trips with his good friend, Billy and dropped off work early to make sure that his daughter was alright. That she wasn't contemplating suicide. Nothing could hurt Charlie more than losing her. He was still haunted with the memory of Bella's face when she was brought out of the woods.
What had he seen?
Heartbreak. Misery. Despair. Hopelessness. Worthlessness. Heartbreak. Misery. Despair. Hopelessness. Worthlessness.
Enough to scare Charlie Swan forever.
Esme Cullen loved her family. She cared for every single one of her children and was every bit passionate about her husband. Every day, Esme would clean the house, do the garden and countless little things to improve her home.
For many, Esme Cullen was the best maternal figure that had ever entered their lives.
But, Esme had changed. The love and care were still present; they were just being masked by a different emotion. Longing and sadness.
Esme Cullen could not shake off the guilt of knowing that she had left a daughter behind. She vaguely remembered her human life and was aware that emotional wounds were hard to heal. Sometimes, time just wasn't good enough a medicine.
There was one human girl that made Esme cringe with shame. Six months afterwards, Esme considered herself an idiot. How could she have just ditched Bella without a single farewell? How could she have conceded to her son's wishes, knowing how much this would hurt her daughter?
Esme Cullen did not feel like a good mother. Her son, Edward had been convinced that Bella could just move on and start a new life with someone who was 'better than him'. But, she herself could tell that Bella was stubborn; Esme could not picture her letting go very easily.
Esme smiled sadly to herself. It was too easy to begin thinking about Bella these days. Esme wondered whether after six months Bella would have moved on. Even if just a little. Esme did not want her daughter to be in any pain.
Esme Cullen shuffled over to allow space for her husband, Carlisle to sit on the couch. She was comforted by Carlisle's arm around her waist. Slowly and silently, Esme buried her face into his chest and tried to restrain herself from crying. Her husband, understanding as always, began to rub her back.
Esme couldn't control her sobs; it took all her self control to keep herself silent.
Once upon a time, it was highly unusual for the Cullen family to be totally silent for any three seconds. These days, silence happened very often.
Esme could only hear the breaths of her family and the distant sounds of passing cars.
Esme Cullen was startled when the silence was shattered by her daughter, Alice.
"That's enough!" Alice exclaimed suddenly. "Edward's not here to stop us! I'm going to see Bella's future!"
Thank you for reading. Please, review?
The future that could shame her forever, Esme thought sadly.