AN: This really is the final chapter. I was saving this as a start for a possible sequel, but that's not going to happen. I'm writing a new story "Undiscovered" instead, I hope you will like that one too.
So here it is: the real end of Angel Undercover! Enjoy!
Chapter 30: All yours
I watched him sleep all night. I had wondered in the past how Edward could tolerate the boredom of watching someone breathe in and breathe out over and over again, but I don't think I'll ever grow tired of listening to the steady beating of this strong heart. Jake's heart.
Yeah, I'm in love.
Right now, I can't remember why I have been holding back so long. As soon as I let go, surrendered to him, I thought I'd be lost, but in fact I felt more home, more peaceful than I have felt in my long life.
He roped me in, had me captivated, and I don't ever want to lose that feeling.
I was counting down the hours till I could ravish him again, let this new experience take me over, but as time went on, the thoughts of Emmett and what I had to do put a downer on my fluttering heart.
It pulled me down, until I realized I wasn't going to be able to make love to Jake again, not before I put things straight first. Things that should have been handled a long time ago.
So I reluctantly dragged myself away and wrote Jake a note, saying that by the time I got back to him, I would be truly his. He would understand where I was and give me time.
I didn't plan on needing much time, however. Now I decided to go through with this, might as well get it done and over with. I ran home and ran into Emmett before I had anticipated to. He sat on the steps of the front porch, as if deep into thoughts. The sight actually worried me a bit. When I pulled to a stop in front of him, he stood up and took my hand, leading the way towards one of the cars, saying "let's go for a ride, babe."
He avoided looking me in the eye, a very unusual thing for Emmett, but I didn't ask questions, as he obviously needed privacy first.
We drove in silence and he parked the car in one of our favorite spots, on a hill with a view over Seattle. After the engine was cut down, we still didn't speak, but the silence grew louder. I chanced a look sideways and saw him staring through the front window, the hurt on his face obvious and already my heart broke. While the hardest part was still to come.
I took his hand in mine and silently hoped that words were not needed here, and for a long time that was true. We watched the sky over the city light up, each of us swimming in heart ache, without a sound, without a tear.
Emmett eventually was the first to speak.
"I know I pushed you into giving this a shot, but damn if I'm going to pretend now that it doesn't hurt like hell, losing you."
Our eyes finally locked and even though our eyes were dry, the pain was clear.
"It's the same for me, Emm. And you know you'll never lose me."
"I know that. But you won't be my girl anymore. I didn't want to be all mellow on you, I wish you all the happiness in the world, Rose, I really do. But…" His voice cracked and he broke eye contact to stare again.
"I'll miss you, too," I said, and he squeezed my hand.
Slowly the fear was creeping up on me again, panic rising, a voice saying 'what the hell are you doing?', and I must have showed my anxiety because Emmett, my companion for all these years, saw, and pulled me closer, saying "you're doing the right thing. I know you are. This is just gonna hurt a little."
And so we let it hurt. More than a little.
At times it made us gasp for air we didn't need, and we squeezed each others hand with a force that would break human bones.
When the first rays of sunlight started to scatter over the city, Emmett released his grip, and held my face in his hands.
"Let's roll," he whispered. Attempting to replace the pain with a new kind of excitement.
Change is a difficult thing for vampires, but Emmett always manages to see the fun in new things. He took a deep breath and repeated out loud, with a little more resolution "let's roll!".
We both mustered a little smile and he roared up the engine.
I tried to let his enthusiasm reach me and kept saying to myself I'm doing the right thing. The vision of my sleeping wolf before my eyes. He was worth this sacrifice from me. There was no doubt in that.
The vision popped when Emmett spoke again. "I'll move to another room."
"Oh, no, you don't have to do that. I mean,… I'm the one… I should move."
"Nah, it's fine. I want a different view anyway and let's face it, you're gonna need the bed more than I do."
He laughed out loud at my embarrassed expression, and I tried to counter.
"I'm sure you'll manage to hunt plenty of vamp ladies, now you're a single man again."
"Maybe. But I think I'm gonna take some time by myself. Rethinking things."
I turned towards him, he looked serious.
"You know… My singer and all." Now he was embarrassed. I know he believed that in the long run, he was destined to be with his singer, but I didn't know that it was an active thought in his mind.
"Are you going to go look for her?" I asked carefully. The idea of Emmett leaving the Cullens suddenly firing up the hurt again.
"Not yet, Rose. Don't worry. I know you. You're gonna be all over the place the next few weeks or months, you're gonna need a friend. I'm not going anywhere."
I smiled relieved.
"Yet," he added cautiously, and I nodded.
Once we got back home, I followed him into our room – my room – and he put all his stuff on a pile on the bed. He looked at the TV with game console and I nodded. Jasper was the first to notice what was happening, and he started to move one of his reading couches in the spare room, and make place for the TV. We heard Alice enter downstairs and without asking, she started emptying the closets of that room, which were filled with her shoes as all the closets in her room couldn't contain it all. When everything was moved and the rest of the family was informed, I sat down on the bed and waited for my excitement to return again.
Emmett sat next to me and I saw his gaze roam across the room, undoubtedly saying goodbye to all the happy and passionate memories we made here.
"How scared are you? Scale one to ten."
"About an eight," I admitted, "you?"
"I'm not scared at all, Rose. I'm sad. Very sad. But not scared. This is a new beginning."
I nodded and tried to focus on the word beginning. Tried to ignore the big neon sign that said "ending".
"You should go back to him. There's no point in bathing in what's lost. You made your decision, he's the only one who can comfort you right now."
"How about you?"
"I'll go hunt me some bear. Alice said se saw some fierce ones near our camping spot."
Him mentioning "our" camping spot shot more memories through my brain.
"Fuck, Emmett, I don't know…"
"You do know. Stop thinking. Go meet him."
I looked him in the eyes and saw nothing but encouragement.
"He's right for you. Now go," he said, and then grabbed me in a bear hug while he added in a whisper, "I'm letting you go."
We held each other for a long time, holding on for dear life, and when I let go, I said "thank you," and finally stopped thinking.
I went downstairs and just like last time, I ran to Jake. As fast as I could.
And just like Emmett had, Jake sat on the steps in front of his house, waiting for me. An anxious look on his face, much like the anxiety I had felt the last couple of hours.
He stood up when he saw me and we looked at each other for one short second, and then our arms were hugging and our lips were kissing.
I breathed him in and I knew I was right. This was right. He was the only one who could comfort me.
And I whispered in his ear "I'm all yours."
All Yours – Metric
Other lives, always tempted to trade
Will they hate me for all the choices I made
Will they stop when they see me again?
I can't stop now I know who I am
Tear me down they can't take you out of my thoughts
Under every scar there's a battle I've lost
Will they stop when they see us again?
I can't stop now I know who I am
Now I'm all yours, I'm not afraid
and you're all mine, say what they may
and all your love I take to the grave
and all my life starts now
AN: Thank you all for your wonderful reviews, you are what got me into writing again!