Merlee: Oh my god this story is so sad T~T
Ikuto: Then why did you write it?
Merlee: Because I love sad stories T~T
Amu: You really love sappy love stories, don't you?
Merlee: -nods- T~T I admit it
Miki: Merlee doesn't own Shugo Chara or the characters. She's merely an obsessed fan.
Merlee: Who loves sad stories! T~T
Merlee: Quick Note! To all of you who have this on story alert and me on author alert, there isn't a new chapter, like there was messaged. I needed to change something that would have resulted in a plot error in the chapter I'm writing now, and that I'm almost done with, I might add ^^
I hung upside-down on the monkey bars, my note in my hand. My entire family was gone, even Ami, all because of a drunk driver. Yes, I would miss everything about my life. My friends, the people I loved, my charas, but without my family, none of it meant a thing.
I clutched my note tightly in my hands. On the front I had written, "Please send to Tsukiyomi Ikuto". I doubted that the police would send it to him before reading it themselves, but I had to make sure that it was known that the note was for Ikuto's eyes only, even if somebody else had to read it as well.
I held another piece of paper in my hands as well. It was my will. Some things left to Rima, some to Yaya, some to Utau, and everything else to Ikuto. I wanted to make sure that Ikuto had a lot of things to remember me by.
I let tears roll down my cheeks. I was afraid to do it now, but I was going to anyway. I had made my choice. I took a deep breath. "Ikuto," I whispered even though nobody could hear me, "I love you."
I unwrapped my legs from around the monkey bars. Suddenly wished that I hadn't. What am I doing? I thought, There were so many things I wanted to do, so many things that I could have done, things to live for! It was too late either way. I had chosen death over everything else, and now I had to face my own, stupid choice.
I felt my head hit the cold, hard pavement. So many memories filled my mind; happy memories with my friends. The moment I found my charas, my first charanari, having Nadeshiko as my best friend, meeting Rima, babysitting with Yaya, eating ramen with Utau, so many good memories that could have filled the hole left by my family's death. All wasted. A few more memories filled my head, the best memories I had. Ikuto. His smirk, his violin, his beautiful midnight blue hair with eyes to match, the way he teased me, everything about him. My last memories.
"Ikuto," I whispered. My last word.
I love you, Ikuto. My last thought.
I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. My last breath.
I closed my eyes and in that same instant, I was gone.
Five minutes later…(Ikuto's POV)
I heard a loud knocking sound at the door. Who in the world would visit someone this late? I thought. I answered the door anyway. There stood a cop and in his outstretched hand he held a folded piece of paper.
"You Tsukiyomi Ikuto?" he asked.
He put the paper into my hands "This should explain it."
"Uh, thanks?" The cop walked away and I shut the door. I looked down to the paper. On the front was written "Please send to Tsukiyomi Ikuto" in Amu's handwriting. I reluctantly opened it. The message inside brought me close to tears.
Well, if you're reading this, well then I'm dead. Okay, that was really cliché, but cut me some slack. You only right a suicide note once haha. Yeah, that was a bad joke. I decided to kill myself because of what happened to my family, but I wrote to tell you something more important than that. Well, this is going to be a little hard to put considering the fact that I've actually never said this to anyone without the help of Ran's chara change, but I'm going to do my best, anyway. Ikuto, I love you. Yes, I got really mad and really annoyed when you'd tease me, but looking back on all of it now, I loved it. But I promise you that the second before I die, my last memory, word, and thought will be of you. I enjoyed my life and my time with you, but not even that is enough to overthrow my grief. Please, please forgive me for this, but remember, wherever I am, I'll be watching over you and keeping you safe.
I'll love you forever,
I couldn't keep count of how many tears rolled down my face. It wasn't that common for me to cry. Amu was dead. Amu was dead! That was the only thing that constantly surged through my brain, and I couldn't seem to get it out. Amu is dead. Amu is dead… Gone. Gone. I'd never be able to see Amu again.
Why did things like this have to happen?
Meanwhile (Amu's POV)…
I woke up in laying something soft and cold, but somehow warm as it bit into my skin. I opened my eyes to see the bright, soft glow of snow even though it was in the middle of July. Not only was it snowing, but also I was in a forest that I didn't recognize. It consisted of trees and hills all around me except for the small, flat clearing I was in. To my surprise, I wasn't cold and I was numb instead.
Where am I? I asked myself in my head, Why am I not cold?
I got up, but as soon as I did, I became dizzy. I almost feel backward, but I was able to keep myself still. Then, I heard a whisper. Amu, it said. It was a soft voice of a gentle woman, although I couldn't see one, Listen to me, Amu.
I stood still and listened carefully.
I have news that you killed yourself, the whisper said. Ouch. I really had killed myself! Amu, the whisper went on, you wish to go back to your life, do you not? You wish that you could stop yourself, correct?
I nodded and answered, "Yes."
I can give you a second chance. I'll send you back as Ikuto's guardian angel. Only he will be able to bring your soul to life once more.
Before I could answer, the snow around me raised up and I was completely engulfed in it, unable to see a single thing in front of me. Pure white surrounded me wherever I turned. Ikuto's guardian angel? That was something I could very easily deal with.
Amu's funeral was the worst thing I ever experienced in my entire life. She was always so optimistic, so why had she decided to die? And apparently she had a lot of friends. The entire room was filled with crying people. I didn't blame them for crying. I myself was about ready to. Of all people, why did it have to be Amu?
I walked up to her casket and I looked in at her cold, dead body. The empty shell that was once the girl I loved. I began to cry. I put my head down on the edge of her casket and I cried so much that I could have flooded the whole funeral home with my tears. Out of everyone that death could have taken for it's own, it had to be Amu. Couldn't it have been someone else? I asked myself, Couldn't it have been anyone but Amu? Utau grabbed my shoulder and pulled me away.
"Ikuto," she said, her eyes had filled up with tears as well, "People are waiting."
I sat back down. My life was starting to suck.
Later on, at her burial, it started to rain. I felt like the sky was crying with me over Amu's death. As the priest spoke I knelt beside Amu's grave like a widow who just lost her husband. Or, in my case, like a widower who has lost his wife. Or best of all, a kid who lost the girl he loved. The tears just wouldn't stop rolling down my cheeks. I'd never be able to tease Amu again. I'd never see her blush, smile, laugh, or the way her sun colored eyes sparkled, or the way she glowed when she healed x eggs. Everything that had made Amu who she was, the girl I loved, was gone. Forever.
I felt a slight breeze brush against me, and it enveloped me in what felt like somebody hugging me. I remembered suddenly what Amu had said in the note, Remember, wherever I am, I'll be watching over you and keeping you safe.
A whisper as quiet as the breeze that embraced me filled the trees. No matter how quiet it was, it was enough to make me break down. And I kept that promise, the whispering said. It was Amu's voice. Could she really have been watching over me? No, she couldn't be. Ghosts are things that only little kids believe in. She couldn't have been with me, could she? No, it wasn't possible.
Of course not! I was being unreasonable, right? Right.
Even after the burial I stayed behind. Amu had already been ripped away from me once, and I wasn't about to be parted with her again. I took in a deep breath and let it out slowly, releasing thousands of tears. Why did Amu kill herself when she had things to live for, people she loved? Thinking this only made me feel worse. I put my hand on the dirt in Amu's grave and closed it. Oh Amu…
Don't cry for me, Ikuto, the whispering said, Please, don't. I looked around the cemetery for anybody who could have been whispering. I saw no one.
Come on, Ikuto! The whispering went on, Face the facts!
"What facts?" I asked the voice aloud
I'm hearing Amu's voice, but she's dead and I miss her. I'm imagining things, I told myself.
I nodded to my own logic. I had to be imagining things. Only insane people heard voices, right?
Being a guardian angel was hard. Weren't guardian angels supposed to protect people from anything, even sadness? Was I supposed to stay hidden from Ikuto? Did I have to go with him everywhere, even when he used the bathroom or took shower? I wished I had thought more about the roll of "guardian angel" a little more before I had taken the job. But being Ikuto's guardian angel…
For what seemed to be no reason, Ikuto got up from my graveside and wiped his eyes. "I'm okay. I'm okay," he said. I had a feeling that he was trying to convince himself this. But as his guardian angel, I took the role of his consciousness.
"I'm not okay," I whispered, mimicking Ikuto's voice, "I miss her, but it's okay. Grief is expected after death. I need to accept it." I sighed. If only I had taken my own advice into consideration. Then I wouldn't have to give it to Ikuto.
"Just imagining things…"
"I need to calm down," I said, using Ikuto's voice again. Maybe this was the kind of things guardian angels are supposed to do.
"Yeah. Calm. I need to calm down." I smiled. I'd helped Ikuto a little, and that made me really happy. It was about the happiest I'd been in a while. Maybe being an angel made things that made me happy simpler so I could enjoy myself more. Or maybe being around Ikuto was making me happier. Maybe both.
But I wanted to do nothing more than embrace him like I did before. I could have done it again, but he wouldn't feel anything other that a breeze, even if I did have a form. He wouldn't be able to see me. Only other angels and people with a sixth sense. Either way, I put my now-pale hand on Ikuto's shoulder. Even if he could only feel a breeze, he needed it.
Almost as if he knew I was there, he said, "You're watching me now, aren't you Amu?"
I'd have given anything to make Ikuto truly happy again. Why did I kill myself?
Merlee: -sniffs- So sad!
Ikuto: WHY?! -holds Merlee at gunpoint- WHY DID YOU KILL AMU?!
Amu: hehehe I get to follow Ikuto into the bathroom!
Merlee&Ikuto: o.o; pervert.