Disclaimer: I don't own Glee.

A/N: Hey, folks. This idea popped into my brain one night and I simply haaad to write it. As you should have learned from the summery, this story is an AU, contains slash, and will be a romance threesome between Kurt, Puck, and Finn. That's right. AU. Slash. And Threesomes. Remember it.

Anyway, this is "Pre Glee". The story takes place around three weeks before the start of their Sophomore year, and around three months before the Pilot episode of Glee.

Uuuhm, what else? Oh yeah, for around half the story you will be seeing a lot of Cross-dressing!Kurt. Sooo, if the ideas doesn't sit well with you... byeee. Oh yeah, I should also mention that I switch POVs... like, a lot. I'll be switching from all 3 of the main guys a lot in this story so, uh... get used to it? Hopefully its not too confusing for anyone.

Also, this chapter was sexified (meaning beta'd :P) by Secretly Batman.

Hmm... I think that's it. Enjoy the show.


Kurt stared in the mirror, a small smile on his lips. His eyes traveled up and down his body slowly, taking everything in. With a self-satisfied look in his eyes, he twirled lightly, his dress flaring about his legs.

For as long as he could remember, Kurt had been entranced by women's clothing. His obsession had started long ago, back in the days of when his mother was still alive. He remembered a time when they would play dress up together, his mother adorning him in her overflowing dresses as she placed overly big heels on his feet. They would giggle and laugh in front of the mirror while his father watched from the doorway with a fond smile.

His parents had thought it was cute when he asked for a pair of 'sensible heels' for his fifth birthday. However, to this day, his love of women's clothing stayed with him.

The dress he now wore had been his mothers. He had been in one of those moods; feeling depressed for no reason and simply wanting to remember his mother. Lying around in her room, he breathed in the smell before digging through the closet, looking for anything that reminded him of her.

Inside the closet was a box with all of her old clothes and accessories. Even after closing his eyes and letting the smells drifting from the box calm him, he still longed for his mother. And for the first time since her death ten years ago, Kurt felt the desire to play dress up.

He had a wistful smile on his face as he looked at himself in the mirror. It was a black cocktail dress. The silky material wrapped around his neck, exposing his back and hugging his midsection nicely. The hem was uneven, riding up on his left side and then pooling around his ankles on the right. On his feet were a pair of black heels that laced around his ankles and accentuated his legs.

He had to admit, he looked smokin' in a dress.

Kurt sighed, lifting the hem of his dress and then lowering it. He wondered what his father would think if he came in from the garage and saw him in this. Back when he was a small child, his father had thought it was cute how his 'two favorite people' had shared their 'girl time'. Kurt snorted. He could imagine how their conversation would play out if his father could see him now.

"Hi, Dad. Oh, what am I doing wearing a dress? Didn't you hear? According to Vogue, cross dressing is the new, um, black." Yeah, right.

With a sigh, Kurt removed the dress and donned his regular clothing again.


Puck sighed as he lay on Finn's bed, watching the other boy kill another hulking green alien in a violent shower of blood. They were in Finn's room, wasting away what remained of their summer vacation before they had to return to McKinley High School for their sophomore year.

"Dude," Puck blurted out, flopping listlessly on the bed. Finn made a distracted sound of inquiry. "I'm so bored."

"So let's do two players," Finn suggested, pausing long enough to flash Puck an excited smile.

Puck sneered at the back of Finn's head. "Yeah, no thanks. I don't really feel like blasting Wookies in Gaylo."

"Gaylo?" Finn raised an eyebrow, unimpressed. "Really?"

Puck shrugged. "I want to go out and do something! I mean, we're studs! Well, I'm a stud. But still! We should be out partying, not sitting around playing video games like a couple of losers."

Finn frowned, tongue poking out the side of his mouth in concentration. "Well, what do you want to do?"

"That's the problem," Puck groaned, pressing back against the bed in frustration. "What's there to do in this town?" His response was only a distracted hum.

Puck sighed, glaring at the back of Finn's head. They'd been best friends since forever, but sometimes he wondered what type of person Finn would be if Puck hadn't been around to straighten him out. Seriously, sometimes he thought the other boy was only one step away from becoming a nerd, or doing something unforgivable like—like show choir!

"Let's throw a party," Puck offered half-heartedly.

Finn snorted. "Yeah, right. My mom would tear off my leg and beat me with it if I threw a party."

Puck's mom was the same, unfortunately. She would probably nag his ear off in Hindi or something before sending him up to his room and chasing everyone out of the house.

Puck racked his brain for a more realistic activity. "Then let's go to the mall and cruise for chicks."

"I don't know..." Finn said, clearly reluctant to leave his game.

"Dude, come on!" The more Puck thought about it, the more exciting the idea seemed. Finn, however, didn't seem to agree. "Well—"

"I heard that new Call of Duty or whatever was just released..."

"Let's go!" Finn grinned at him before shutting the game off and sprinting out the door.

Puck sighed, following the other boy out with a shake of his head.


Kurt was bored. He'd been at home all day, watching the America's Next Top Model marathon, but he had quickly grown tired of it. Of all the seasons, how many of the winners had actually become top models, anyway? Hah. None.

With virtually nothing else to do, he found himself spiraling into boredom. And when Kurt got bored, the first thing that entered his mind was to go shopping. Usually that wouldn't have been such a problem, as he had his father's old car to ride in.

No, the problem lay in what Kurt wanted to wear to the mall.

Normally he'd have just thrown on his favorite collared shirt and a pair of skinny jeans, but today he was feeling especially daring. And to be honest, the feeling scared him.

Today, Kurt wanted to go shopping dressed as a girl.

In the safety of his own home, cross dressing was merely a hobby and only something he did to remind himself of happier days. But not once in his life had he had the urge to actually go out into public dressed as the opposite gender. Sure, he was flamboyant and feminine, but not once had he ever crossed that line.

Kurt bit his lip, his eyes on the dress and heels that lay on his bed.

Fear swirled through his mind, unrelenting. What if someone he knew from school recognized him? What if something embarrassing happened and it was revealed that he was a man? What if he ran into his dad?

Kurt shuddered at the last one. He couldn't even imagine the shock and disgust on his father's face if he ever discovered Kurt's little secret. It would be simple to add together the other obvious clues before his father would know he was gay.

But the thrilling idea of becoming someone else, someone of the opposite gender, and going out into public... it excited Kurt, and he didn't know why. To have men noticing him and willing to look; the very thought sung to him.

With a final sigh, Kurt built up his resolve and began planning. If he was going to do this, he was going to do it right!


Puck rolled his eyes almost as soon as he and Finn entered the air conditioned mall. Finn had broken off from him and headed straight towards a store to browse through the latest video games. Puck, however, had a different objective in mind: women.

He was dressed casually, in a pair of low-riding black jeans and a muscle shirt. With his body, he knew he'd make anyone look twice. In fact, when he saw his own reflection in a nearby mirror, he winked at himself.

Sweeping a hand through his mohawk idly, he hummed to himself, wondering where he should begin his search. Almost immediately he was heading in the food court's direction.

The mall was a big place, and on a crowded Saturday afternoon, Puck knew that it was perfect conditions for girl hunting. Girls love shopping, and Puck loved girls. It was only natural that they could both congregate at the same place.

The Lima Town Mall was like any other mall, Puck imagined. There was a Gap, a Hot Topic, Sears, and a bunch of other girly shops Puck couldn't care less about. There were also several escalators leading to higher floors and people flooded the place, talking loudly and smacking each other carelessly with shopping bags as they walked.

Puck reached the food court without incident, taking a seat in a small, squared-off area. He slouched casually, turning on his natural charm and scanning the crowd for any potential conquests.

At first he looked at girls who were already seated. Mostly they were with families or a boyfriend, but there were the occasional group of girlfriends.

He pointedly ignored the group of giggling girls who stared at him from the closest table. They looked like they were still in middle school. And although age wasn't usually such a problem for a stallion such as himself, he'd rather not have anything to do with someone his sister's age.

Next, his gaze drifted to another pair of women who appeared to be mother and daughter. The daughter was okay at best, someone Puck would normally never look twice at, but the mother had a rack that he just wanted to—to motorboat! He stared at her breasts for several long moments before letting his gaze drift up to her face. She was staring right at him with an indignant expression, but he just leered back at her. Her expression turned to one of disgust before she looked back to her daughter and leaned her cheek pointedly on her hand.

Was that a wedding band he spotted? Ah. Oh well, she was a butter face anyway.

Puck looked across the mall, considering getting something to eat as he continued looking for a girl worthy of his time. A flash a black suddenly caught his eye.

He froze.


Kurt smoothed his dress down self-consciously as he stepped out the car, his heels clicking against the stone parking lot. He couldn't believe he was doing this! Already he felt mortified, his cheeks flushing and his eyes darting around suspiciously.

He had taken every precaution possible before he had even stepped foot outside his door. He had planned every detail meticulously, leaving no room for error if he was going to go through with his plan. First, he had taken a duffle bag and placed all the necessities of his operation inside it, including the dress and heels. It wouldn't do to walk out of his house as a woman. The neighbors would see him, and eventually their talk would reach his father's ears.

Instead, Kurt had opted to park behind the mall in a deserted area before changing out of his casual clothes and into the clothes he brought. With all the yoga he did, it was only a simple matter of bending so that he could slip on the dress within the confines of his car.

A long, curly light brown wig had been pinned to the top of his head, also fished out of his mother's old things. Carefully-applied makeup covered his face, including a light eye shadow and shiny lip-gloss.

Kurt was adorned with the same cocktail dress and heels he had tried on, only this time he had accessorized the outfit with an elegant silver chain around his neck and a matching bracelet on his wrist. He went without earrings, having never had his ears pierced.

All in all, it would have taken a miracle for someone to recognize him at first glance. Kurt was only a vague resemblance to his normal self. Usually he hated his androgynous body, but today he was thankful for it. With his feminine features and body, he looked perfectly natural wearing a dress and heels. Still, that didn't settle his nerves in the slightest.

To finish his look, he pulled out a simple Gucci handbag and slung it over his shoulders. With a final nod, Kurt walked slowly and deliberately, dreading a stumble, although he had practiced walking in heels since he was a baby.

As he walked, he gained more confidence, his gait becoming sultrier; however, it all but disappeared as soon as the automatic doors leading into the mall opened. With the whoosh of the doors' opening, Kurt's breath left him. The sudden urge to run back to his car despite his heels and dress gripped him, and he almost would have, had he not been bumped into suddenly from behind.

A strong pair of hands landed lightly on his waist and he felt his heart leap into his throat. "Excuse me, miss." The man who stood behind him apologized, inclining his head.

Kurt stammered out an apology of his own, steadying himself and stepping away to head into the mall. The man nodded, his eyes doing a brief sweep of Kurt's body. They lingered for several seconds on Kurt's legs before once more returning to his face.

Kurt blushed, earning a small smile from the man before he walked away. He could still feel the remaining warmth on his hips where he'd been touched.

That guy totally just checked me out, Kurt thought in shocked pleasure, his blush deepening. Honestly, it was the closest thing he'd ever had to a sexual encounter when it came to members of the same sex—Kurt didn't count being tossed into dumpsters. A feeling he had never experienced before began to slowly build within him. It wasn't exactly confidence, nor was it mere satisfaction. However, whatever it was put the thought into his head that he was desirable, worthy. Sure, it was because he was dressed like a girl that he received such attention, but the truth remained—it was Kurt that the man had been checking out.

With a more confidant stride, Kurt began walking down towards the food court, swinging his hips and flipping his hair. He felt like such a diva, and it was addicting! The thought of actually flirting with other men entered his mind, but he was still much too nervous to do such a thing.

Besides, today was just a test run. In fact, he would need an entire new wardrobe for this persona.

Kurt giggled to himself, adjusting the purse slung over his arm and entering the nearest shop. As he browsed panties and bras, he wondered what his new identity should be named.

Katrina? No, he didn't want anyone to be reminded of a certain hurricane when they thought of him. Kimberly? Ugh, no. He had known a Kimberly in middle school, and she had been an absolute troll. No fashion sense whatsoever, always mocking what Kurt wore.

How about Kate? It was cute and simple, just like Kurt. With a satisfied nod at deciding on 'Kate', Kurt held up a G-string and felt his face flame anew. With the dress he was wearing, he had had to wear girl's panties (which he had several pairs of) and a G-string was so scandalous.

"Is that your first G-string?"

Kurt jumped nearly a foot in the air, quickly setting the skimpy piece of clothing back in the pile. He turned to the perky, smiling store attendant, who was luckily a woman. His cheeks were tomato red with mortification.

"Uh," he coughed, changing the pitch of his voice, "N-no. I was just—just browsing." Through his singing training combined with his naturally high-pitched voice, it was no problem for Kurt to adjust it to sound like he was female.

The attendant's smile turned into a knowing smirk. "Well, if you need anything, be sure to let me know." She turned and flounced away.

Kurt nodded politely, feeling that he had spent enough time browsing in this store. He didn't exactly need any more underwear, though the idea of wearing a bra did cross his mind. However, since he had no breasts to speak of, he decided to go without.

He walked out of the store and decided where to go next. As he was thinking, the smell wafting over from the nearby food court captured his attention. He hadn't yet eaten lunch, and his stomach growled quietly. Thinking of having a small bite to eat before doing some more shopping, he headed past the tables and over to a counter, scanning the menu. Unsurprisingly, he found no salad; almost everything was loaded with carbohydrates and trans–fat. Meanwhile, someone sidled up beside him, but he paid them no attention—at first.

"Hey," the voice next to him said silkily.

Kurt felt his blood chill.

With wide eyes, he turned to his left to see none other than Noah Puckerman, resident high school bully, regarding him with a confident smirk.

Kurt gulped. This could not possibly end well.