Not Without a Fight: Rematch
AN: This rematch was requested by an unregistered reader, Katie. I had actually expected someone to request this one quite awhile ago and I was surprised it took so long to come up! Haha. So yeah, everyone thank Katie. Also, thank Hans153, for her never ending patience and willingness to answer questions such as: "Can sand conceivable cut soft tissues? I mean, it is stone, and you can scrape yourself on it... But could it actually lead to blood loss?" Because being my beta for this story is sure to be a strange ride.
This takes place six months into the relationship, making it the second earliest story in this series so far, after the story of them meeting, of course. It contains no spoilers for NWAF, so I hope you all enjoy it!
As with most of my lemons, if you aren't of age in your country to read smut, at the very least keep it to yourself, yeah? My purpose here is not to write porn for minors, but then, I've been underage before too. I'm good with just being ignorant to the fact.
Be warned, this chapter is 4k+ words of awkward and humiliating.
I guess I own Not Without a Fight, but I do not own the original Twilight saga. That would be Stephanie Meyer.
People really should mention what a bitch it is to have a girlfriend in the summer.
I mean, an actual girlfriend, one that you see every day and care about and can't get enough of as it is. One that you lay in the shade with for hours when the sun's high and talk about everything and as cheesy as it is you're happy as shit because every moment with her is just that awesome. One who kisses you softly after you buy her ice cream or some shit and leaves sugar on your lips.
And one who was currently in the world's smallest swimsuit, laughing and skipping through the surf at the beach. She was going to be the death of me.
Don't get me wrong. I'm not what you would call inexperienced. But Alice was a lot of firsts for me. Out of all of the girls, since I was thirteen and Jessica Stanley let me touch her under her bra in the closet during Seven Minutes in Heaven at Tyler Crowley's birthday party, Alice was the only one I had ever dated. When I was still performing with the band, I had my pick of girls after the shows, but with Alice I couldn't stop thinking how lucky I was that she had picked me. Especially after the whole thing with her thinking I was that James guy.
She was the first girl I had really cared about.
She was the first girl who had given me hope regarding the whole idea of love and relationships.
She was the first girl that I didn't just fuck and forget.
I closed my eyes as a fresh wave sent up spray on the shore and Alice shrieked, jumping back, the salt water beading on her skin and making that damned bikini cling to her even more. I laid back in the sand, pushing my hat down over my face and letting the sun warm my bare chest. She was going to kill me.
And she was so damned innocent. Alice wasn't like me. She hadn't become jaded early on to the concepts of sex and intimacy. I couldn't just take that from her. I couldn't be the one to spoil that.
But I wanted to. There were at least twenty times a day when I imagined pushing her against any available surface and taking her so thoroughly that she wouldn't even know her own name. I wanted her to be mine. Only mine, in every way.
I heard a muffled thumping sound and then my hat was lifted off of my face. Alice was crouched on the sand beside me. She put my hat on, grinning at me, and then planted her hands in the sand for support as she balanced on the balls of her feet. The effect was to push her breasts together and I nearly groaned. If I didn't know better, I would think she was doing this on purpose.
"Are you okay?" she asked with a puzzled smile.
"Never better," I said, nearly cringing as my voice cracked. Yeah, that was sexy. Alice laughed.
"Are you going to get in the water?" she asked. Because that was just what I needed to maintain control over myself. To be in the water with the wet, barely covered girl of my dreams. I shook my head. "Okay," she said, leaning over to kiss me. She tasted like salt and summer and I was about one second away from losing my mind.
This was ridiculous. If things went on like this, I was going to end up doing something on impulse, and ruin it. Alice deserved better than that. She deserved for her first time to be special or some shit. I had to come up with a plan. And quick.
But despite my convictions that this should really be more than some teenage grope-fest, my hand was going to her waist, holding her in place as I sat up, deepening the supposedly innocent kiss. Alice let out this little happy sigh, and that was it. Game fucking over. All control just went out the fucking window. I twisted, moving so that she was under me, my hand sliding around to the small of her back to press her against me.
Her hands came up to thread through my hair and I groaned. She broke the kiss to laugh and I blushed. My scalp's always been weirdly sensitive and it's pretty embarrassing.
"Sorry," I muttered. She shook her head.
Cute. I didn't want to be cute. I wanted to be fucking manly and virile and all that other Harlequin fantasy bullshit.
"Are you sure you're okay?" Alice asked, looking concerned. I wanted to scream. This was not going right at all. I wasn't supposed to be pouting about my scalp sensitivity, of all ridiculous things. I was supposed to be acting all suave and seductive and all that.
"I was just wondering if this was okay," I said. Might as well use the pause to check, right? Alice looked confused for a second, but then understanding spread across her face.
"You mean..." she looked at me pointedly. I didn't answer. I couldn't tell what she thought about it. If this wasn't okay, then I didn't want to come across as some jackass. She looked around furtively. There hadn't been another person on this beach all day - it was one that Charlotte had recommended as 'romantic' purely for the reason that it was so isolated - but I looked around, too, confirming we were still alone.
"I want you, Alice," I said softly. She blushed, biting her lip. "If you're not ready-"
"No," she said, shaking her head. My stomach dropped. Well, that was that then. My thoughts must have shown on my face because she laughed again. "No, I mean, I'm not not ready," she said. "I want it to be you."
Oh shit. Alice wanted me. It was weird. Up until that exact point, I had pretty much seen her as completely innocent. It didn't occur to me that sex would even occur to her, on that level. I figured it would be something that we would have to sort of work our way around to, not something that she would already want. And with me. Alice wanted me the way I wanted her.
Well, consider my mind completely and totally blown.
She pulled me back to her, her fingers threading through my hair again as her lips met mine. I shuddered at the contact, balancing with one hand in the sand while the other slid up from her waist and around her back to find the knot on her swimsuit top. She arched into me, making space for my hand to move between her and the ground, pressing her body against mine in the process.
I found the loose end of the knot and pulled. Nothing happened. I pulled harder. Still nothing.
"Jesus fucking Christ, is this thing super glued on?" I asked. Sure, I could unhook a bra with one hand while severely inebriated, but a swimsuit top? No sir.
Alice dissolved into laughter, her body falling back to the sand. I stood up, kicking the sand in frustration. It wasn't the most effective outlet.
"Jasper, it's okay," she said, trying to control her laughter.
"It's not," I snapped. I took a deep breath, trying to keep my cool. I was fucking embarrassed. In the thousands of times I had imagined this moment, I had not once been stopped by something as stupid as a simple fucking knot.
"Jazz, come on," Alice said, no longer laughing. I bent over and picked up my hat, putting it back on and starting off down the beach. Alice called after me, but I just shook my head and continued on. Well, that was a disaster I hadn't foreseen.
It wasn't actually that bad, a part of my mind told me.
Fuck off, she was laughing at me. That's never good when it comes to this.
She was probably just nervous. It is her first time, you know.
Yeah, and it was a fucking mess.
Just because you're embarrassed.
It was embarrassing.
I stopped. This argument with myself was fucking stupid. The short of it was, I was embarrassed and I had taken it out on Alice. Over something as stupid as a knot. Really? That was how this was going to go?
I spun around, determined to go back, to at least talk to her, if not try again, only to find myself face-to-face with her. Well, face-to-top-of-her-head, anyway.
"It's not that big of a deal," she said bluntly.
"I know," I muttered. "But you were laughing and-"
"It was funny," she said exasperatedly. "I thought sex was supposed to be fun. I don't know why anyone even wants to do it if it's all serious and stressful. So if something's funny, why not laugh? Or do we have to stop each time and get all huffy and weird?"
I gaped at her. She exhaled hard and then reached behind her, quickly untying the bikini top and pulling it off. She reached out, grabbed my hand, and shoved the fabric into it, closing my fingers around it.
"There. Now that that's resolved-" she started, but my lips crashed into hers, cutting off the rest of her sentence. On one level I felt like that should have completely emasculated me, but fuck me, that was one of the sexiest things I had ever seen Alice do. And that was saying something, since for the last couple of months literally everything she did could get me hard.
She wrapped her arms around my neck, pressing her breasts against my chest, and my mind was instantly reeling from the skin-to-skin contact. I skimmed my hand across her skin, grinning at the gasp that escaped her, letting just the tips of my fingers drift across the swell of one breast. She pressed harder against me, pulling her lips from mine to kiss my neck softly before her tongue flicked out, drawing a smooth line up to my ear. She pulled the lobe between her teeth, biting lightly.
So far, almost none of this was new, but it was setting me on fire like never before. I cupped her breast, kneading it gently as she went back to work on my neck, sucking lightly. I needed to get us back over to where my towel was spread on the sand - or, more exactly, to my backpack next to it - but I couldn't bring myself to pull away from her.
I let my hands drift back down, cupping her ass.
"Wrap your legs around me," I said.
"Hmm?" she muttered, rubbing slightly against me. I inhaled through my teeth.
"We need to get back over there," I said. "Safe sex and all that."
She laughed, sending warm air across my neck. I resisted the urge to shiver as, with a bit of a hop, she wrapped her legs around my waist. This had the simultaneously pleasant and tortuous effect of lining us up perfectly, with only thin swimsuit material between us, and I practically ran back to the spot.
I set her down gently, taking a second to really look at her, laid out for me in just those skimpy bottoms before I knelt down between her legs, swooping down to kiss along her collarbone and down the center of her chest. She sighed, her hands coming to my shoulders as I kissed across her ribs and around her breasts, circling closer and closer to her nipples, but never quite touching.
"Jazz," she whimpered, arching her back. I laughed and looked up at her. She looked back at me with lust-darkened eyes. They fluttered shut when I finally took a nipple in my mouth, sucking gently as I reached for the other one, rolling and pinching it lightly with two fingers. She gasped and I felt her shudder, grinning against her skin with the satisfaction that I had caused it.
I moved my hands down, hooking my fingers in her swimsuit bottoms, tugging lightly. She raised her hips to let me slip them off and I leaned back to pull them all the way off, taking in the view. Alice blushed, trying to close her legs, but I grabbed her thighs, keeping them apart.
"Jazz," she muttered, avoiding my eyes.
"I'm afraid me looking at you like this is part of the deal," I said, trying not to laugh. "Not that I'm sorry," I added, making her blush harder. Sure, she could present me with her top in the middle of the beach, but this made her blush.
I leaned back down, kissing her hard, settling more fully between her thighs.
"I need you," I breathed, pressing my lips to the smooth skin of her neck. She made that happy little sighing sound again, which was quickly becoming my favorite sound in the whole fucking world, and arched against me. I hissed at the friction it caused and realized with a jolt of terror that I was almost there. I wasn't even in her yet - hell, I hadn't even taken off my shorts - and just that bit of contact had me about to blow.
I shut my eyes and tried to think about anything other than the girl of my dreams in my arms, ready and wet and fucking willing. I wasn't having much luck, because she chose that moment to start kissing her way down my neck and across my shoulders. And then her hand was working its way between us.
"Alice-" I started to warn her, but it was too late. She rubbed me through my trunks and I just completely lost it. I came with a strangled cry, my vision going fuzzy and my body tensing.
Oh. No. Oh shit. I did not just...
I couldn't respond. I was hoping, on some level, that if I was very, very still, she wouldn't realize what had just happened. I tried to calm my breathing, my forehead against her shoulder.
"Did you just..."
Please, don't let her ask that. Don't fucking let her ask that.
"Um... did you come?" she asked quietly. I cleared my throat, more to stall than anything. It's not like I had anything to say to that.
"Sorry," I finally said, moving off of her. She sat up with me, grabbing my arm. She looked at me with the most serious expression that I had ever seen on her.
"Okay, don't walk away again, promise?" she asked. I nodded, my jaw tense. I still couldn't look directly at her. She abruptly burst out laughing. I scowled.
"Fucking hell, Alice, it's not fucking funny," I said.
"No, no it's not that," she said. "I was just so worried about you being more experienced than me, and then you..." she couldn't continue, she was laughing too hard. I waited for it to end. But there was no malice in her laughter, it really did sound more like relief.
"It's your own fault, you know," I said, smiling despite myself.
"How do you figure that?" she asked, the laughter finally slowing to sporadic giggles.
"You're the one who's been fucking bouncing around in that tiny ass swimsuit all day. I've been ready to go since this morning," I said. She stopped laughing altogether.
"Ohhh," she said slowly. "I didn't know that."
I scoffed. She leaned over and kissed my cheek softly. I finally turned to look at her and she grinned.
"So," she said, raising an eyebrow at me.
"So what if I still want to do this?" she asked. I just stared at her for a second before laughing. I don't know what I did to deserve such an easy-going, accepting, candid girl, but I'd do it again a hundred times.
"It might take a minute," I said. I let my eyes drift down her body. "But I'm young yet. I'm sure I can go again."
"Maybe not as quick this time," she said.
"Oh shut up," I groaned. She smiled and rose up on her knees to swing a leg over my lap, straddling me and running her fingers through my hair. I groaned and she sealed her mouth to mine, kissing me passionately. Regardless of what I had told her, I was already responding to her, feeling myself harden in the confines of my trunks.
I rolled us so that she was under me again. As much of a turn-on as it was to have her on top, I got the feeling it wouldn't be the easiest position for her first time. I reached for the front pocket of my backpack, digging around inside until I found the little foil packet.
I moved off of her just long enough to pull my trunks down. I had completely lost all patience. I was now absolutely sure that if I waited any longer to do this, something else would go horribly wrong.
She watched as I tore open the packet and rolled the condom on, biting her lip as I settled back between her legs.
"You're absolutely sure?" I did take the time to ask that, being a fucking gentleman and all. And apparently determined to allow every opportunity to sabotage this. She nodded, still biting her lip. She suddenly didn't look too sure. "You know it might hurt, right?" I asked. She nodded again.
"Rose said it's only for a minute the first time," she said. I grimaced.
"Do not talk about my sister if you really want to do this," I warned her. She nodded. I lined myself up and slowly pushed in. Alice hissed and I stopped. I hadn't gone far enough to hurt her yet, but I was on edge with the thought.
"Keep going," she said. "It's just... tight, is all."
Damn right, it was. I pushed forward, slowly, focusing on my breathing and the sand under my palms and everything except how fucking tight she was. How hot. How fucking perfect.
I met a slight resistance and paused, looking into her eyes. She nodded and with one swift motion I pushed through. She gasped and clenched her teeth shut, her jaw rigid. I stayed painfully still as her eyes watered. After a few moments she exhaled carefully.
"Okay. Just go slow," she said. I complied, pulling out a little and thrusting back in, lengthening each thrust until I was almost all the way out before pushing back in.
Something... wasn't right. I hated to acknowledge that, because this was Alice and everything should have been fucking rainbows and unicorns and cotton candy and shit, but something definitely didn't feel right.
"Jasper, stop," she gasped, her nails digging into my shoulder. "It really hurts."
"I thought it was okay?" I asked. She had seemed calm enough after I had pushed through, once the initial shock had passed.
"No, Jasper, I mean, something really hurts," she repeated, wincing, her eyes watering. I pulled out, startled. I hadn't wanted to actually hurt her. I knew it hurt girls the first time, but I didn't know it was that serious.
She sat up gingerly and looked down. There was blood on the towel under her. I looked down and saw that it was also on the condom. It wasn't a lot, and I thought that was pretty normal, too, so I couldn't figure out what was causing the freaked out look on her face.
"I think the blood's normal, don't panic," I said, trying to keep my voice calm, to hide the fact that I was panicking myself. Of course, I was panicking because I had somehow managed to hurt her enough to have to stop, not because of the blood.
"No, Jazz," she said, her voice higher than normal. "The sand."
"The sand?" I asked. I looked down and noticed that, sure enough, sand was all over the fucking towel. And, most likely, judging by the sand on the condom and that weird wrong feeling when I was inside her, it was also in her.
"Oh fuck beach sex and that whole fucking romantic cliche!" I burst out. I wasn't sure what to do. Did she need to go to the hospital? I looked at my watch. Rosalie wasn't due to pick us up for another three hours. That would be some story to tell a couple EMTs.
"What do I do?" Alice asked, her eyes wide.
"I have no clue. I'd ask Rose, honestly," I said. I didn't relish the idea of explaining this to my sister, but it had to be better than going to the hospital.
When Alice called Rosalie and explained the situation, she laughed for a solid five minutes, long enough that I actually forgot for a minute that Alice was even on the phone. When she finally calmed down enough to speak, she informed Alice that her body would eventually force it out on its own (which is an image I could have done without) but in the meantime she should avoid "aggravating it". Thanks, sis.
"So," Alice said as we gathered up the towel and backpack, having pulled on our normal clothing. "Am I finally rid of that pesky virginity yet?"
I laughed despite myself.
"I think we should try it in a bed next time," I said. She nodded.
"After everything works itself out," she added.
AN: I thought about carrying this further to their next "first time", when it actually goes well, but I think it pretty much goes without telling that they eventually got the hang of it. Please keep in mind that they're barely sixteen in this outtake.
Anyway, the disaster first time was an idea that was hinted at already in NWAF, in a few exchanges:
"Yeah, but it's not like it has to be some big production. It's a natural part of life," Jasper pointed out.
"Oh yeah, nature man?" Alice asked, grinning. "You want to tell them about our first time?"
"Alice," Jasper said warningly. "Anyway, are you making any progress?" he asked. I got the feeling he was trying hard to steer the conversation away from the subject of him and Alice.
"Beach sex," Jasper mused. "Pretty ambitious for a first time."
"All that sand," Alice muttered mournfully.
"You guys are really not comforting," Edward grumbled. Jasper took a second to calm himself and then turned his attention to Edward, looking at him seriously.
"Okay man," he started carefully. "What we're saying is, there's not much you can do. First times are always awkward. But you love her, and so no matter what, it'll be fucking beautiful and fulfilling or some shit."
"Very nicely put," [Emmett] congratulated him.
Basically everything pointed towards a complete disaster. So yeah. Moving steadily along! Do you have a request? I'd love to hear it! Don't have a request? I'd love to hear from you anyway!
Next up: Hans153's newest request, featuring one of Alice's sessions with Dr. Cullen. See you then!