Title: I Thought You Were Gonna Give Me Something Hard
Rating: T
Spoilers: Season 7's Child's Play
Summary: Gibbs and Abby are forced to deal with their sexual frustration over Thanksgiving... A pic!fic with screenshots from Child's Play.


This is a pic!fic, which is a format that this site doesn't currently support. Without the pictures, this isn't going to be the best-written thing in the world, because the reaction shots are what make it. The fic with pictures can be found here (replace the stuff in brackets with the correct punctuation and paste into your browser): http [colon slash slash] hinkykinky [dot] livejournal[dot] com [slash] 40386 [dot] html#cutid1

Text content below:

For those who didn't see the episode, Gibbs tells Abby that he might not be going to Ducky's for Thanksgiving just after Abby says "I thought you were gonna give me something hard" regarding a job he's given her. The first line is Abby's canon reaction to this bombshell:

Abby: Who's gonna carve the turkey? Who's gonna watch the game with me? Who's gonna eat too much pie?

Gibbs: If you're gonna touch me, I'm gonna touch you, Abbs. Only I'll be going a little lower...

Abby: Don't talk to me about sex when I'm thinking about Ducky!

Gibbs: *pause* You thinking about Ducky now?

Abby: You just mentioned his name, Gibbs. Yeah, I'm thinking about Ducky now.

Gibbs: Okay, I'll come back later. How about a cheek kiss?

Abby: That's your job.

Gibbs: Okay, okay, I'm going. I'll be back later to give you something hard, and you better not be thinking about Ducky then.

Abby: Yes, sir!


Later

Gibbs: I'm back...

Abby: Gibbs! Don't make me jump like that! I was trying to make a frog out of jello and you ruined it! Let me throw it in the trash, and then we can continue this conversation.

Gibbs: Are you focused on sex yet?

Abby: Hmm, let me take a moment to think happy thoughts...

Gibbs: I was thinking about taking you up against the wall...

Abby: Ooh, that's a good thought... There. Officially focused on sex now, sir.

Gibbs moves closer.

Abby: No, wait. McGee sent me a link to this robot-dance vid on YouTube, and now I have it stuck in my head.

Gibbs: What?!

Abby: I'm sorry, Gibbs... I don't know where it came from!

Gibbs: *sigh*

Abby: I said I was sorry, already! It's not you... you're still my silver-haired fox and I love you. It's just my stupid brain.

Gibbs: Okay, that's it. I'm calling DiNozzo to take the lead on the case for a while, and I'm going shopping for whipped cream and candles. Come round to my place later and bring sexy lingerie.


Later still…

Gibbs: *answering phone whilst driving* Yeah – Gibbs…

Abby: Hey, it's me. I got the robot dance out of my head. I was thinking we could try some phone sex.

Gibbs: I have the entire team listening in, Abby. And unless Ziva keeps looking out of the window, she's gonna notice if I get too turned on...

Abby: Oh. Okay.

Gibbs: I have a busy night ahead of me. We're gonna have to wait until after Thanksgiving.

Abby: But I want you now!

Gibbs: Now you know how I felt earlier. *hangs up*


Even later, at Ducky's for Thanksgiving dinner…

Abby: Where's Gibbs?

Ducky: I have no idea, my dear.

Abby: *thinks* But I need him to be here so we can have sex after dinner! Hmmm... if he doesn't show up, I guess I could go for Tony instead.

*door slams*

Abby: YES! *Gibbs enters* Have some wine, Gibbs! *thinks* Get nice and drunk just in case you're not in the mood yet…

Gibbs: Thanks, Abbs… *thinks* Okay, let's see if I can do this subtly... Hand Ducky the bag, then oh-so-casually put your arm around Abby and kiss her cheek...

Ducky: A toast!

Gibbs: Happy Thanksgiving. *thinks* Now eat fast, so I can go have sex with Abby.

Abby: Happy Thanksgiving! *thinks* Let's eat, I wanna go have sex with Gibbs! Let's skip dessert, okay?

Gibbs: Sounds good…

END.