This is my first fanfiction in…goodness, I don't even want to calculate! And it's my first Glee-ful story to boot. Anyways, I want to give you guys a heads up.
This is not going to be a happy story! Because basically, what I wanted to do was have a progression of Finn and Kurt's relationship in the most realistic way possible while still having some chemistry between them in the first place. Which I could be – and probably am – totally off base on. To be honest, I wrote this awhile ago and only decided I would actually upload it now…oh yeah, and it takes place after Hairography and kind of goes on it's own little train track from there.
Anyways, I'm done with that! I think the story will have to speak for itself now. Let me know what you think!
Disclaimer: I don't own Glee! And it's all for the best, what a maudlin mess that would be.
Among the tangled lives that threaded the hallways of McKinley high, Kurt Hummel stood out for all the wrong reasons. He wasn't noticed for his ability to score seemingly effortless field goals, but rather for the fact that he had to channel Beyonce first. His clear soprano, though pitch-perfect, was jeered at for its similarity to a girls (there were crude jokes of how Kurt didn't have the "equipment" to make for the voice of a normal teenaged boy, but he scoffed at these with a grim sense of self-satisfaction). And when his choice of dress turned heads, whether it was the D&G raincoat bought solely for slushie warfare or the unitard he had donned for his Single Ladies YouTube cover, his impeccable ability to accent his slim figure was met most often with a Big Quench to the face.
This particular day, instead of appreciating the brilliant blue-green hue of Kurt's large eyes, his uncouth teammates on the football team chose to recognize the object of his gaze.
"Keep your eyes off the quarterback, fag." One of them yelled. Kurt closed his eyes before he could see which had spoken, resigning himself to the familiar dull thud of his body on the bags full of miscellaneous trash. Eventually this would get old, he told himself. One day.
Climbing out when he heard their voices retreating, Kurt leaned back on the unforgiving black metal of the dumpster and sighed, absent-mindedly fixing his bangs. A dull pressure built in his forehead as he glumly reflected on what had earned him today's trip to the trash. Finn and Quinn, in their bubble of a revitalized relationship had arrived at school together as they always did these days. Arm in arm, they had strode past everyone without a second glance. But the look on Finn's face had stopped Kurt in his tracks. Tenderness he had never seen on it before practically seeped out of the pores of his admittedly-dry-but-otherwise-flawless skin as he smiled at the blonde by his side. A sharp pang in his chest had rooted him to the spot as his eyes couldn't help but follow the tall teen that held his heart as he walked away. It was soon after this that his motionless stance caught the eyes of much less desirable football players, and he was whisked away.
Which brought him back to square one. Kurt winced as he tested weight on his right foot; it had snagged unpleasantly on the lip of the bin, and a thick throbbing was letting him know just how hard the hit had been. The pressure in his head continued to mount. No wonder he was being so unbearably catty lately; the bullying, sectionals, the undeniable fact that he just didn't stand a chance, could never stand a chance… it had reduced him to lashing out at Rachel, something all too easy on the best of days.
As he headed to the bathroom to dust himself off and fix his hair properly, the churning in his stomach refused to cease. Something had to change, he thought to himself. Or he would snap worse than Norma Desmond in Sunset Boulevard.
The school day itself was mainly uneventful: a blur of facts and formulas and interpretations that Kurt dutifully copied down while the better half of his brain wandered in home-spun fairy tales, stories where there were two princes who lived happily ever after and the beautiful blonde princess was no longer an active part of the equation. It wasn't until math class in last period that he was finally diverted from his daydreams. Sinking into his usual seat towards the end of the middle row, his eyes drifted to the doorway. He'd be there soon. Always just in the nick of time before the bell, he would shuffle through the door, calling out last words to his friends in the hallways. But today was not the same. Less than a minute after Kurt had resigned himself to his seat, Finn strode into the classroom, his eyes far away. And if Kurt was already taken aback at his uncharacteristic promptness, he was positively speechless when Finn smoothly pulled out the chair next to him and sat down.
"Hey." He said to Kurt, glancing over with his signature dopey, lop-sided grin. His eyes were still glazed with that peculiar, romantic sheen that had been there that morning.
"Finn," Kurt said quickly. He mentally cursed his excitable complexion; all this blushing would force him to re-apply his foundation… "Hi."
"I heard some of the football guys tossed you in the trash again this morning. You okay?" The genuine concern that creased his brow brought an uncomfortable lump to the base of Kurt's throat. This was the reason; why no matter what he told himself he couldn't help but grasp the knowledge that somewhere, whether it was romantic or not, Finn cared about him. In that gentle heart of his, somewhere was a tiny corner that was only for Kurt. Even if there were other people – other girls – that held much greater portions. His smile faltered at the thought.
"F-fine." He mumbled. "Nothing I haven't been through before." He chuckled nervously, his attempt at lightening the reply falling flat.
"Oh…" Finn looked troubled a moment longer, then his face brightened. "Well, I wanted to ask you. After school can you stick around for a bit longer? There's something I kind of wanted to talk to you about."
"Of course." Kurt said, nonplussed.
"Cool." Finn said, smiling easily, and turned to the front of the room in an attempt to prevent failing the algebra unit.
The minutes crawled by with an unprecedented dullness. Resisting the urge to drum his carefully sculpted nails on the desktop, Kurt fell back on his other nervous habit: lip balm. Fifty-two minutes and half a tube of Prada's moisturizing lip treatment later, he remained still in his seat while most of the class eagerly rushed towards what was left of their Tuesday afternoon. Finn had milled at the door, waving goodbye to his football buddies. When the room was empty, with the exception of the teacher who was marking papers, he gestured for Kurt to follow him out the door.
"Is something going on?" Kurt inquired as they walked down the hallway. "I don't mean any offense, but you don't seem the type who can handle any more drama than what you've already got to deal with."
Finn glanced around uneasily. "Hold on, let's wait until we're in the auditorium. No one's ever in there when Glee's not rehearsing unless it's Rachel, and I know she has a master's ballet class or something today. So we'll have some privacy."
The word brought an immediate swooning sensation to Kurt's stomach, and he was unpleasantly reminded of his dad taking him to the amusement park as a kid. Burt Hummel had been excited about showing his son the ropes of the best roller coasters the state had to offer, and started him out on the most reputedly terrifying ride of them all. After being stealthily nudged past the height limit (Kurt had always been small for his age, but at six it was all the more apparent), he had been strapped into a mock-skydiver's harness and proceeded to have the most terrifying five minutes of his entire life to date. Until, perhaps, now. So caught up in this and the pounding of his heart, Kurt placed far too much weight on his tender ankle. Stumbling slightly, he was steadied by a warm hand grabbing his wrist.
"Is something wrong with your foot? The coach is going to freak, there hasn't been a practice where he hasn't yelled about how you should be back on the team."
Kurt could only smile weakly in reply, trying desperately to keep his hand still, when all he wanted to do was twist it in the quarterback's grip and squeeze it tightly back. The raw need of the sensation dampened his curiosity of what Finn had to say, and his face fell into familiar haughty melancholy.
"I don't think I'm quite the football type either way. The helmet hair is unmanageable."
They walked between the rows of seats in the auditorium, making their way to the front row. Kurt stopped in front of the stage.
"Tell me what's on your mind, Finn."
"Okay." He was quiet a moment, the intensity of the far-away look in his eyes building. Sitting down in the nearest seat, leaving Kurt standing somewhat awkwardly in front of him, he took a deep breath and made his confession.
"I slept with Quinn last night." Seeing the color drain from Kurt's face, he hurriedly added to his account. "We used protection and everything, but I'm pretty sure since she's already got one going it won't mess anything up. Unless it gets a twin or something, I guess … it's just that, I'd never done that before. With her, or with anyone, and it made me feel so close to her …"
In front of him, a low quavering cough emitted from Kurt's throat but he drove on without noticing.
"I just really needed to talk to someone about this. And Puck acts so messed up whenever I talk about Quinn or the baby with him…and you were always so helpful and understanding before, like when I was telling her parents and stuff. So I thought that you could hear me out…and also, I mean it seemed like you were worried about whether Quinn and I would stick together or not. I kind of wanted to let you know that we're all good."
"I see." The boy in front of him mumbled, his voice thick as he sank into the seat next to Finn. He refused to make eye contact, looking straight ahead with an expression reminiscent of a deer facing a pair of oncoming high beams. "Now let me get this quite clear. Quinn is pregnant."
"Yeah, that was confirmed for sure awhile back."
"But you've never had sex with her." Kurt said softly.
"Well, we figure it happened in her hot tub, I'm not the greatest with uh, self control sometimes…"
"…Never had sex with her until last night." He finished. Finn nodded, and Kurt couldn't bear to look up and catch that gleam in his eyes, that beautiful happiness that graced his features.
"Finn," he began, his voice still straining to be light. "What makes you think that the baby's yours?" Finn stiffened slightly, puzzled.
"Quinn's my girlfriend. She has been for months."
"Of course," Kurt said, mainly to himself. "And now you're closer than ever." He added, chuckling mirthlessly.
"Yeah…we really are. And I don't know if I could've handled this past week without you helping me out, Kurt. It really means a lot to know you have my back." Uneasy, Finn glanced at the boy next to him, unwillingly taking note of his grey complexion and pinched expression. These warning signs receded into the background however, when Kurt looked up and smiled warmly, even if it didn't quite touch his eyes.
"I'm very happy to have been helpful. You helped me get on the football team, and I never really thanked you for that. So I'm glad I got to do something in return for you … and for Quinn."
"Well, that's what friends are for, you know, which is pretty cool." Finn grinned goofily. "Thanks for hearing me out. I should go now though, I have to take Quinn to a doctor's appointment, she'll be wondering where I am. Do you need a ride anywhere?"
"Oh God, no," Kurt said quickly, and then backtracked. "I think I'm actually going to stick around here for awhile, maybe practice the new number. I've been having some trouble with the steps."
"Are you kidding?" Finn laughed as he stood up, stretching. "You had it nailed before anyone! Except maybe Rachel, but she doesn't really count. She'd be like a second teacher if she wasn't so young. And you know, such a spotlight fiend." Laughing, Kurt stayed seated, twisting to watch Finn go.
"I'll see you later, then." He called after him, stumbling briefly on his words. Finn paused and turned around.
"For sure. See you!" And with one last effortless smile, the doors to the auditorium were echoing shut.
Kurt sat very still in his seat, watching an empty stage. Not only was Finn an absolute fool, for believing he could be the baby-daddy in the first place, but he was an absolute fool in love. He stood up, his posture momentarily slumped as he slammed his eyes shut, trying to shatter the images of Finn and Quinn being intimate. After a minute of self indulgence, Kurt squared his shoulders and strode out of the spacious room. It was time to drive home, put on My Best Friend's Wedding and sob his sorry heart out.