Notes: For Prussia's "birthday," back when the poor guy had one. ILUPRUSSIA.


Unbirthday Surprises



He'd only gotten a cake because Liechtenstein had insisted. She'd practically had to plead with him to figure it into his daily food budget for August first and even then, he made cuts elsewhere to make up for the excessive price. When it was Liechtenstein's birthday, he'd put money away in advance for the presents and the cake; but when it came down to his own birthday Switzerland wasn't too concerned.

His current celebration was small. Just him and his sister seated at the kitchen table. Atop it was his birthday cake, if you could call it that. It was small, exceedingly plain, and was more like an over-sized cupcake than an actual birthday cake. The candle now lit atop it was one he'd pulled from the cupboard, a single taper candle he used during blackouts. Switzerland made his wish, a hope for lower prices in the next year, and blew the candle out. Liechtenstein applauded.

Switzerland gave his sister a warm smile, then reached for a plate to cut her a half of the cake. That's when he heard it. The loud cacophony on the north side of his house that was getting louder by the moment. Pausing, he bade his sister stay in the house and went to grab up his favorite shotgun and a few other pistols just in case.

"A very merry unbirthday to me! To who? To me! A very merry unbirthday to me!"

Shooting directly into the nearby bushes, the song came to an abrupt halt. A familiar face emerged, leaves in his hair.

"Prussia, what are you doing?"

The former empire tried to look innocent, and wiped aside what Switzerland suspected might have been a tear. "Haha, my awesome unbirthday party is so awesome that even you want to come and celebrate it with me!"

Switzerland narrowed his eyes. "Your what?"

"Unbirthday. Jeez man, haven't you seen the Disney movie?" Prussia shook his head ruefully when Switzerland just continued to scowl. "Don't have my own birthday anymore, since I'm...since I'm not a country." He laughed nervously and plastered on a wide, faked smile. "But that's just awesome because then I get to celebrate my birthday whenever I want! And I get as many unbirthdays as I want. And I can buy myself awesome giant cakes. Aha. It's not like I'm missing out on a real birthday or friends or anything like that!"

Switzerland edged closer with his gun still pointed at Prussia. Sure enough, right there in the bushes was indeed a large, three-tier decorated birthday cake done up in white with black and gold icing.

"Just get off my property and stop interrupting actual birthday celebrations or I'll fill you and your cake with bullets."

Prussia blinked, then looking between Switzerland and his rifle still aimed at his chest, he grinned. "Oh, sorry man. Didn't know it was your birthday. Well, um..." He warily eyed the gun. "Would you uh..." Wincing he blurted out the one thing he figured might save him from being shot. "You want my cake? I can't eat this all by myself."

It was such a odd question that Switzerland's grip on his rifle loosened. "You spent all that money on such a large cake just for one person?"

Prussia stood to his full height and picked up the cake. Reluctantly, he shoved it towards Switzerland. "Yeah well, you take it. You probably have more friends to eat it. I mean, I'd share it with West and Italy, but they're busy today and...and..."

The neutral country's mind went into overdrive. Someone was offering him a very expensive and large cake for free. He really couldn't turn such an offer down. Even if it meant he couldn't shoot Prussia today.

"That's..." Switzerland cleared his throat and slung his rifle over his shoulder. "Well. It's just Liechtenstein and I, so I suppose you can have a few pieces. It is your cake after all."

Prussia's smug grin resurfaced now that the apparent danger was gone. Handing over the cake, he clapped a hand to Switzerland's back. "Awesome. Then let's eat!"

Switzerland shifted awkwardly under Prussia's gaze and turned to walk back inside. "Fine."

The blonde kept a wary eye on Prussia as they entered his house. He wasn't quite sure what to think of what had just occurred in the bushes. He'd encountered Prussia before on numerous occasions, but nothing quite like this. He was celebrating a not-birthday alone, Switzerland's mind pointed out. And for the briefest of moments he felt a small bit of pity for the guy.

"Brother, we have a visitor?" Liechtenstein's voice snapped him out of his thoughts. He hadn't yet figured out a way to explain why Prussia was there and before he could, Prussia spoke up.

"Hey there, Liechtenstein right?" She smiled and nodded. "Awesome. I just dropped by because I knew your bro was being a bit stingy on the birthday stuff and figured he could use some more awesome. I hope you like cake, because this one's a big one!"

He patted the girl on the head and beamed. She just giggled. "I'm glad someone came for brother's birthday. It's usually just us two."

Prussia glanced up, a momentary flicker of something Switzerland couldn't quite read in his eyes before he grinned like the moron he was. "Aww, well don't worry. My awesome will definitely make this birthday extra special."

Liechtenstein just nodded and went back to sit down. "You can put any gifts with mine, Mr. Prussia."

Like a deer in the headlights, he froze up; his eyes quickly darting to Switzerland, then to the rifle on his back, then to Liechtenstein. "Oh yes, the gift. Just a second, I left it outside!"

He rushed out the door and Switzerland shook his head. Figures the idiot would make a run for it when he could. He thought to himself as he sat down at the table. Perhaps if Liechtenstein and I only eat the top tier, we can freeze the rest and save it for our next couple of birthdays...

Cutting a slice for Liechtenstein, and just about to cut a thin slice for himself, Switzerland started as loud footsteps sounded down the hallway and a voice sounded in his ear.

"Here. Happy Birthday," Prussia said, thrusting a hastily assembled bundle of daises into Switzerland's face.

He frowned at first, knowing that those were the daisies that grew in the field up the road. What a cheapskate, how dare he... Switzerland cut off his own thought and blushed. He'd done the same thing for gifts before, gathering local flowers and passing them off as a bouquet.

"T-Thank you," he mumbled, taking them from Prussia. Turning his back to hide his burning face, he muttered. "Sit down. We're about to eat some of your cake."

Grinning, Prussia did as he was told.


The next year on August first, Switzerland was both somewhat surprised and yet, somehow thankful, when Prussia showed up on his doorstep with a large cake and a small wrapped gift. Sure, the gift didn't amount to much (a homemade German techno CD with gunshots and yodeling remixed in) but it was the thought that counted.

"You shouldn't be so alone on your birthday," Prussia had commented in between bites of cake. "All birthdays should be huge and awesome events!" Liechtenstein quickly agreed. The two of them practically ganging up on Switzerland as he got flustered and protested any sort of large to-do for his sake.

He's probably just here because he doesn't have anything better to do. Switzerland reasoned as Prussia laughed and joked. I mean, what does a former empire even do with all that free time?

But his mind flickered back to Prussia's lone celebration of an 'unbirthday' and Switzerland realized he couldn't get too mad.

The third year went by mostly the same. Prussia arriving with a cake, a gift (this time a homemade gun rack, or at least that's what he said it was. It looked more like a jumble of wood and garish paint) and a smile on the doorstep and Switzerland once again allowing him into his home for the now not-quite-as-quiet celebrating.

When Prussia left that evening, all grins and smugness, he clapped a hand on Switzerland's shoulder and asked. "What do you want for next year?"

Raising an eyebrow, he quickly composed himself and replied, "Could you make the cake red and white? Liechtenstein suggested it being in my flag's colors."

"Awesome. I can do that. Anything else?"

He shrugged. "Surprise me."

Prussia smirked, hugging a flustered Switzerland to his chest as he proclaimed, "All right, awesome surprise it is, birthday boy!"

He turned to leave, as Switzerland huffed and straightened out his clothing. But just as he was about to reach the end of the front sidewalk, a thought came to Switzerland. "Prussia, wait!"

He halted and turned around. "Huh?"

"When..." He strode out onto the sidewalk, closing the distance between them. "Sorry to ask, but when was your birthday?"

Prussia looked perplexed. "January 18th. Why?"

Switzerland nodded. "Please visit that day."

"For what?"

"A surprise."

With a wide, genuine grin, Prussia replied awestruck. "Really? That's…that's really awesome of you, Switzerland."

"Next year, then?"

"Yeah, see ya then!" Prussia smirked, giving Switzerland another bone-crushing hug before turning to go; waving over his shoulder and laughing at some joke that only he could hear.

With a blush tingeing his cheeks, Switzerland returned to his house, slamming the door behind him and bolting the door closed with several locks. He definitely wasn't looking forward to next year. Nope. Not at all.

THE END