Title: A Deal With the Devil
Author: Mina Ina Cooper
Summary: Buffy and Spike have been getting really close after her return from Heaven. As he is the only one she can talk to, she confides in him, but not without developing feelings along the way. Buffy's reflection on her relationship with Spike.
A/N: This fanfic begins just after Dead Things (Season 6, Episode 13). Also, this is my third FF, I promise I haven't abandoned my other stories, I just have so many ideas that I'm writing like 5 stories all at once, and some are getting more attention than others. This fic I originally wrote to be a fleshed out story, but I'm losing focus and probably will need time to review my ideas. So right now I'm just going to leave this as a one-shot. I may not update my stories often—they probably will be few and far between. Just saying.
Disclaimer: If I owned BuffyVerse, would I be here writing Fanfiction? Think about it.
Buffy Summers let out a content sigh as she leaned into the body next to her. She and her lover had just finished one of their "sessions" in his crypt. Buffy wasn't sure when she started referring to Spike as her lover, even if it was only in her head. They had been together like this ever since little after she came back from the dead, and she strangely was grateful for his comfort that she seemed to need while trying to readjust to her life.
Usually after long hours, Buffy would leave him in his disappointment and tailgate out of there. She knew it was selfish and wrong of her, but she could never admit to what she and Spike had, even to herself. The two of them had grown closer for the last several months, and being with him made Buffy feel loved and protected. Mostly though, it just scared her.
Tonight though, Buffy decided she was going to stay. She usually only allowed herself to stay longer if Dawn was at someone else's house. Buffy let Spike wrap his arms around her as he cradled her to his side. She knew that the vampire was asleep as his slow, deep breathing set in. Buffy knew that vampires didn't need to breathe, but she noticed that Spike had a habit of breathing in his sleep.
When she first discovered it, Buffy was confused. She had tried to keep her and Spike at an arms distance so she that she wouldn't develop feelings for him. He was a vampire. She was the Slayer. They happened to occasionally have hot, amazing sex. That was it. But the more time she spent with the vampire, she more she saw his human-like qualities. Things like that made it hard to see him as only a vampire, and that Buffy puzzled even further.
Buffy had not drifted to sleep as easily as she would have liked. She knew that if she had gone home right away, she still wouldn't have gotten the sleep she wanted, so it wasn't an issue of being in a crypt with a vampire that could potentially rip her throat out that bothered her. The dreams would plague her no matter where she slept.
The Slayer lifted her head from where it rested on the vampires shoulder. She looked around and noticed that her and Spike ended up on the floor of the bottom level of the crypt. Spike at least had the decency to put a blanket over their bodies before he drifted off. Buffy glanced at the neatly made bed that they had yet to use. Of all the times she and Spike spent together, they never had the patience to get to a bed before they rushed into things. The closest hard surface usually did the trick.
Buffy laid her head back down of his shoulder. Spike automatically tightened his hold and her and pulled her tighter to him. She didn't know how long she lay in his embrace, but it wasn't for a while that she remembered the reason that she usually left him sooner in the night. Buffy tried to pull Spike's arms from around her waist, but he instinctively resisted and pulled her in closer.
She lowered her mouth to his left ear. "I need to go home to Dawn," She whispered. His grip loosened enough for her to leave his side and stand up. She looked down his naked form and internally sighed. She didn't want to leave him, but she couldn't abandon her sister now. Not when she just came back and still had to rekindle their sisterly bond.
The Slayer dressed slowly and took her time in favor of watching the vampire breathe. When she was fully clothed, she crouched by his side. She brushed her lips across his as a goodbye and left the crypt.
It was still very early in the morning. The full moon hung high in the night sky and Buffy found herself staring at it while she strolled out of Restfield Cemetery. She crossed her arms over her chest and once again caught herself thinking of the bleached-blonde.
When it came down to it, the Slayer no longer thought the vampire as a monster. The bad part of him not seeming like a monster was how Buffy felt like she didn't have to be the Slayer in front of him. It was the first time in a long while that she thought herself as vulnerable. Buffy was never one to talk about her feelings and emotions with other people, but she could just imagine those sturdy walls she spent years building crumbling down when it came to Spike.
Buffy hadn't realized how much time had passed when her house came into view. She barely remembered turning her key in the lock or walking up the stairs. Buffy was on automatic as she got dressed and ready for bed.
The nightmares were reluctant to come as Buffy couldn't find sleep. She tried not stressing about her work or raising Dawn alone without their parents. She thought about her friends and how they had been drifting apart from each other. She reflected on the ways she could fight the things that she knew went bump in the night. She even tried not focusing on anything and leaving her mind black, but still Buffy couldn't fall asleep. It was only when a certain vampire entered her head was when Buffy began to finally drift off.