Kaoru sighed loudly and turned over for the thousandth time that night, the sheets softly rustling as he did so. This was getting ridiculous.
He'd been sleeping badly for a week, waking fitfully throughout the night after bouts of restless sleep. And tonight, he couldn't seem to sleep point blank.
He knew why, too. He was frustrated. Sexually, that is.
Hikaru had recently developed the need to be around him all the time. Not that it hadn't been that way before, because, really, they'd always been pretty much connected at the hip, but Kaoru was now realizing that he'd never been fully aware of the few moments he was used to spending alone until those moments were taken from him.
And he wasn't necessarily complaining. He liked having Hikaru around and would rather he was there than gone. They'd never been big on the concept of personal space or privacy when it came to each other, anyway. That's just the way it had always been.
So at first, he'd actually really enjoyed the extra company, especially with the whole Haruhi thing going on.
But he was realizing now, for the first time in his life, that there were indeed certain things he couldn't really do with his brother around. Well, thing, singular, more precisely.
He didn't mind that Hikaru now seemed to prefer sitting next to him on the bed instead of watching TV as he usually would when Kaoru left to read.
He didn't mind that Hikaru now always stayed with him, without exception, until they were both done their homework instead of wondering off to start preparing some prank or other they had planned as he'd been known to.
He didn't even mind that Hikaru would sit on the closed toilet seat talking to him as he took a shower instead of waiting in a different room.
The problem was that those private times, few as they may have been, were the moments he, hormonal teenage boy that he was, had previously utilized to let off some steam, if you catch my drift.
And Hikaru had been tailing for a month. A solid month, where the most gratification he'd gotten was to apologetically cup himself for a second in the shower before glancing over and just barely seeing Hikaru's form through the frosted glass.
Kaoru sighed again and turned his head to look over at Hikaru, the source of his frustration in more ways than one.
Because that was the other thing. Kaoru happened to be completely, head over heels in love with Hikaru. Not to mention that, for some inconceivable reason, Hikaru was also getting more touchy than he'd been. When their hands or legs brushed, it lasted a second longer than it had in the past. When they hugged or held each, especially during the host club act, Hikaru seemed to let go a little reluctantly. And even the innocent, playful flirting they'd been doing forever now seemed to have an edge of something more serious and dangerous to it.
Kaoru sighed again. Just thinking about it had him half hard and a lot more desperate. A glance at the clock told him it was three in the morning.
He bit his lip and glanced at Hikaru again. Hikaru who was soundly asleep with his back to him.
Maybe he could just...
He abandoned the thought before it was fully formed because that would be wrong. Especially given that the thought of getting off with Hikaru right there had sent a hot spike of arousal shooting through him.
Then again, he was sleeping... And it's not like he would know what he was doing, much less who he'd be thinking about...
And he could be quiet.
'So quiet' he thought, giving in and letting his hand rest hotly on his stomach.
He bent his knees, tenting the sheets around him so that any movement on his part would cause minimal noise from the sheets.
He bit his lip again, pushing his hand past his boxers and pajama pants, pushing them down just enough to let his cock out.
He bit back a hiss as he wrapped a hand around himself.
He threw another look at Hikaru with the intention of making sure he was still sleeping. It hit him at once that looking may not have been smart when it sent a fresh bout of arousal through his body.
He let his eyelids flutter closed as he began to stroke himself languidly. He let his mind go blank and his imagination take over, stubbornly refusing to summon any deliberate fantasies. Half formed thoughts were flickering at the edge of his consciousness. A flash of a smile thrown his way, the memory of a body over his, the thought of what lips against his would feel like.
His hand picked up speed, a thin sheen of sweat beginning to form on his body. As he gained vigor, he was off handedly aware of the fact that it was causing noise. He struggled to slow down and minimize his movements, fighting the part of him that wanted to rut frantically up into his hand.
As a result, his climax was bubbling up slowly but to a higher point than he'd ever felt. His breathing was ragged and he could help slightly arcing up off the bed.
When he finally peaked, coming jaggedly over his stomach and only seeing bright white under his eyelids, he knew he was making some noise. The bed had been faintly squeaking, his hand had been making the sheets rustled and he was fairly certain he'd moaned and 'Oh, god...' out loud, but he couldn't bring himself to care.
When he finally came down from his high, slowly stroking himself a final few times, it was to lie there in the bed, panting and still to fuzzy to even think of cleaning himself up or putting his spent cock away.
All in all, he was too out of it to notice that a certain red haired twin had turned around and was staring at him with an amused smirk.
"Thinking of someone in particular?" Hikaru asked with his head cocked, amusement lacing his voice.
Kaoru didn't bother opening his eyes. "Shit," he said, still out of breath. "Sorry, that was just... fuck, so good... I don't care..."
Hikaru laughed and reached over for tissues from the night stand, tossing them over at Kaoru who quickly cleaned himself off and tossed them in a nearby trash can.
"I didn't mean to wake you," Kaoru mumbled. "Or, you know, do that next to you but it's been a while and I had... 'pent up energy'," he said, the last part between quotation marks.
Hikaru chuckled as Kaoru settled into the bed and closed his eyes.
"That was my fault wasn't it?" Hikaru asked.
Kaoru cracked an eye open and lazily turned his head to look up at Hikaru questioningly.
"I mean, this morning in the shower I suddenly realized that I haven't really left you alone long enough for you to... well... you know," he said, with a vague gesture at Kaoru in general.
Kaoru chuckled, surprise to find that being caught hadn't really made him feel awkward. He guessed it made sense since nothing ever seemed to be awkward between them.
"You think of me jerking off when you're in the shower?" he asked teasingly.
Hikaru flushed slightly.
"No," he answered quickly. "Just, that's when I do it so..."
Kaoru cocked an eyebrow.
"So you think of me jerking off when you jerk off," he asked pointedly, still amused.
"No, not really. I mean... I think of you but you're not usually jerking off if you know what I mean," he answered flirtatiously in the way he did when they were playing around.
Yet, even if it was playful, Kaoru was surprised to find that it wasn't coming across as a lie.
He sat up slightly, eyebrows raising.
"Seriously?" he asked, incredulous.
Assessing that he was clearly not repulsed and Hikaru's eyes softened so that he was looking at him fondly.
"Yeah, seriously," he said, adoration showing through his eyes.
"Wow, but that's..." Kaoru started.
"Wrong?" Hikaru supplied. Kaoru shrugged in a way that said 'well, yeah...'. "Only to them. I mean, unless you-"
"No, no!" Kaoru assured him quickly. "But I mean, does that mean that..."
There was a pause.
"That I'm in love with you?" Hikaru asked with a smile. Kaoru was glad that they knew each other well enough to know what the other was thinking. "Very much so."
"The fan girls would kill to hear that line," he said with a laugh. He got serious again, realizing there was something he should probably say. "You know I love you too, right?" he said with feeling.
"Well, I kinda thought maybe you did," Hikaru said, flopping back onto the bed sounding both amused and relieved.
"I do, I love you," he said, moving to dot a kiss on his nose. "I love you so much."
He leaned in and captured Hikaru's lips in a lingering kiss. A first of many.
He pulled back with a smile. He and Hikaru simply stared at each other for a moment before his face fell.
"Did I just go a month without release because the person I'm in love with loves me back?" he said, falling back onto the mattress. "That's fucked up. Seriously, what a waste."
Hikaru laughed and crawled on top of him.
"We can work on fixing that," he said, kissing him forcefully.
"Yeah, I think we can," Kaoru agreed, before pulling Hikaru back to him for a few more kisses.