Ok so I know it's been a while but please hear me out. I had A LOT of trouble writing this chapter and it's basically a miracle that I have gotten it finished now. I didn't think I would be able to do it but I have. And I also had a lot of inspiration for 'A friend's courage' so that took precipice over this story. I'm very sorry for the delay and I will be surprised to see how many people have still been waiting impatiently for this next chapter. So without further ado, please READ AND REVIEW!
Disclaimer = I don't own Twilight! Wish I did though…
History of the past
Bella's Point of View
Edna… She seemed nice. She had saved me when I tried to die but who could blame her? Edna saw a girl on her floor barely alive and she saved her. Of course that would be her first action. And there's nothing that could have stopped her either. When awakening, she was there, sitting on a chair asking if I was feeling alright.
She seemed sweet, kind and caring… Exactly like… Esme.
As I sat there in her bed, looking at the door, I began to wonder about many things. Should I go back to my original plan and try to run away to die? Obviously that first plan failed very easily. What else could I do? There weren't many options available at the moment. Running my fingers through my hair and sighing, I got out of the bed and walked towards the door, hesitating at the doorknob. Would Edna let me stay here? After what she had to do for me, it would be very surprising if she said yes. But hey, I'd never find out if I never asked.
Taking a deep unnecessary breath, I turned the knob and walked towards the main hall. Everything around me was made of wood: the doors, the floors, everything! Had she built this all herself? For a vampire, it's not that unnatural but if she was human, then it would be incredible. Walking further through the hallway, I soon arrived in a familiar room. This is where I had fainted and Edna helped me heal. Edna was standing in front of a counter, her head bent forward.
Approaching her slowly, she didn't move. "If you would like to help me, you're more than welcome," she said, making me jump a foot in the air. How did she know I was here? Well, duh! She's a vampire. My scent could be easily detected and my footsteps could be heard like a hammer hitting the floor.
Approaching her slowly and hesitantly, she still kept her head bent at the counter, only moving her arms in sign that she was actually doing something. What was Edna doing? When approaching the counter, my eyes detected that she was doing chemical experiments on blood. What was she trying to do?
Looking at her, it reminded me of when my eyes opened just a few hours ago and saw her sitting beside me, asking if I was alright. She didn't know me… yet she saved my life from Death's hands. I should thank her for what she had done… but in a way, when looking at her, it only reminded me of Rosalie's figure—considering she looked uncannily like Rosalie—and Esme's kindness. Just thinking about them made my heart clench in pain.
"You may sit down and speak, if that is your intention," Edna spoke, still looking down in her microscope. How had she known what I wanted to do…?
Sitting down, I pulled up a chair close to her and watched her analyse a small drop of blood. "How did you know that?" I asked softly, still feeling odd about the way my voice sounds now. It seems too… perfect, which I am definitely far from. Especially if Edward doesn't want me anymore…
"I could tell by your stance. I might not have been looking but your spiritual energy seemed shaky. Normally, that means you want to either ask something or speak your mind. Feel free to do so if that is your intention," Edna said, looking at me with those soft golden eyes, eyes that reminded me too much of the Cullens that, after a few seconds, I had to look away. It was too painful to think about them and how they betrayed me… No, not betrayed. Simply thrown away…
Looking down at my hands, my fingers began fiddling with one another nervously. "I… I wanted to thank you for saving me. I know I was ungrateful when waking up but I was just scared… This is just… Well, let's just say that it's been a horrible experience since I was changed," I explained, looking at her slightly, trying to force myself not to think of the Cullens when looking in her golden eyes, golden eyes that reminded me so much of Carlisle's wise eyes.
Edna looked away from her microscope and fixated her eyes on mine, turning in her chair to face me with her hands on her lap, like I'd seen Esme do so many times… Why couldn't I stop thinking about them? Why did they have such a hold on me when they want nothing to do with me anymore? "It's quite alright Bella. It would have been a shame to waste the life of such a kind person such as yourself. I can already tell that you've suffered a lot recently but it really would have been a horrible waste to let you die. You really do have a kind soul, Bella," Edna explained with a soft smile on her face.
Deciding to slightly ignore her statement, I took the conversation into a slightly but completely different turn. "Have you seen that because of your gift?" I asked hesitantly.
Edna nodded and began speaking again. "Yes, in a way. But I also see it in your eyes. It's as if I can see the kindness and selflessness you offer others. But I can also see sadness and pain in them, as if something has affected you harshly recently. You don't have to tell me now but, in time, I hope that you can confine in me," she said, placing a warm smile on her face as she kept gazing into my eyes.
Looking in her eyes, I knew that her offer was truthful and filled with care. It felt so much like she could be someone that I can trust, that I could open up to… Maybe telling her a little bit about myself without revealing too much about my life wouldn't be such a bad thing.
Looking back down at my hands, it seemed as though part of the truth about myself slipped out of my mouth and filled the room. "When I woke up, I thought that my supposed family would accept me. Instead…" Sighing, I looked up at Edna and looked her square in the eyes. "They threw me away as if I was nothing to them."
Edna frowned slightly at my explanation and nodded slowly, running her slim fingers against the granite counter and seemed to be deep in thought. "I know exactly how you feel, Bella. I've had the same experience when I had first been changed all those years ago, which is why I am here, secluded from everything and everyone."
"I suppose that I have destroyed that solitude?" I asked, staring at her softly and leaning back in the chair.
Edna chuckled softly and turned her attention back to me, never removing her fingers from the counter. "You might have but I don't mind. It feels nice to be around people once again. And besides, you need a place to stay for a little while and I've been without company for far too many years," she replied, hoping to lessen the mood in the atmosphere and make me smile.
Luckily, she succeeded. "How old are you exactly?"
"I just celebrated my two hundred and eighty-third birthday." My eyes literally shot open when she mentioned her age, which apparently made her chuckle in amusement. "Surprised, are we? I assume that, for a newborn, it is quite old but I assure you that I still look seventeen on the outside," she mentioned with a soft smile.
"Don't worry; I've met older people than you. Car—" It was as if my heart began crippling within itself when nearly speaking Carlisle's name. How was this so painful…? Of course they had been my supposed family but they deserted me the minute I was reborn. They shouldn't matter to me anymore… Oh, who was I kidding? That was an impossible thing to say. They will always matter to me, even in death. Looking away, I placed my hand on the counter and looked at the granite work. "Um… Someone I knew was three hundred and seventy-two years old…"
Edna nodded and seemed to have recognized my expression. "This family that hurt you, was this man part of it?" Nodding, she nodded once and looked at her blood vials on the counter. When looking at them, it made me want it so badly. And the smell… it was intoxicating. I could immediately tell that it was human blood but it didn't seem to affect Edna at all. How long had she been able to hold back against the definite urge to drink all of this blood? "And they are the reason that you wanted to end your life this soon?"
"The only reason that I wanted to be a vampire was to be with… him… But seeing as he doesn't feel anything for me now that I'm a vampire, I don't see where else that I belong. I can't go back to my father's or my mother's and, well, you're the only person I've seen, apart from them, since I was changed," I explained, watching her expression to see what she would do next. Maybe it was a poor excuse to want to die but being a vampire meant nothing if Edward wasn't there with me, by my side, loving me for the rest of eternity. And yes, it is a selfish thing to think of. Maybe he would be better off with that woman he had mentioned… Tanya.
But Edna simply looked back at me and placed a hand on one of mine, gripping it softly. "You and I have a lot in common, Bella," she said, smiling ever so softly at me as she kept her gaze locked with mine.
"During my years of being a vampire, mostly in the beginning, I tried to affiliate myself with men and see how far our relationships could go. I tried as best as possible to stay around vampire men but they were sometimes hard to find, especially in the time. Every time I would try and explain to that person my true nature, they would turn against me, even after months of trust. They could never want the new me because they thought that I would damn them the minute that they turned their backs. No one has truly loved me in over two centuries. It is also one of the many reasons why I stay secluded from everything and everyone," she explained, her smile fading ever so slightly that now, it looked like she was grimacing. "Now, I use my gift to determine who is true and who is faking."
"So, your power is to what exactly? You told me that you could tell how I was feeling from my… spiritual presence? How does that work?" I asked, leaning a little bit forward out of curiosity. It had been the first time that I had heard of someone using spiritual presences as a power.
"Imagine your soul as an orb. And that orb shows different colours, such as black for death, red for anger, yellow for happiness, the list goes on. My eyes let me see that orb. If a person has a strong spiritual presence, then the orb will be large and full of life," she said, motioning with both of her hands the size of a circular object, which I was guessing was the orb she was mentioning. "But in your case, when I found you, it was barely there anymore. It was smaller than the nail of a pinkie finger." Edna lifted her pinkie finger and showed me her nail, using her fore finger and index finger to show just a small part of her nail, indicating how small my spirit had been just a few hours ago. "If I'd found you just a few minutes to an hour later, then you would not be here, talking to me as you are."
It was quite the shock when she explained how I'd been so weak when she had found me. Looking back on my actions, had it really been that selfish to want to die? Sure, Edward and his family had rejected me because, as I had feared for so long, I wasn't good enough to stand next to them but it shouldn't have brought me to want to die. It should have just made me want to run and be away from Forks, maybe forever.
But I shouldn't have wanted to kill myself. Or maybe I did want to but her explanation of my spiritual pressure is clouding my judgement. This was all so confusing…
"I… All I can really say is thank you. I… I don't know what else I can do to—"
"Just… promise me one thing," Edna said, interrupting my stuttering. Looking at her, I did nothing else but nod, the only thing that could be done right now. "Promise me that you will try and live your eternal life to the fullest. I know that there are many things that have happened in your life that you feel as though there is no point in continuing to live but… there are so many things to look forward to. Just try and live it completely alright? So that I may feel that you haven't thrown away that second chance that I have just given you."
It seemed reasonable enough. After what she did for me, it didn't sound so wrong to do what she said. Maybe in the future, I could forget about the… Cullens… like they've forgotten about me. Nodding, I said: "I can do that. Maybe I should start with a hunt first. Would it be alright if I went out for a little while?"
Edna nodded with a smile. "Of course it's alright. Have a good hunt," she said as I stood up and went towards the door. But suddenly, as I wanted to open it, a thought stopped me dead in my tracks, which Edna seemed to have noticed. "Is there something the matter?"
"I…" I began, bowing my head slightly ashamed. "I have nowhere else to go…"
A small chuckle ran behind me, making me look at her. But she smiled at me and looked at me with a warm expression. "I had thought that all of this talking would have made it clear that you are welcome to stay here as long as you need to. It would be nice to be able to have some company and you seem like the perfect addition to this place. If you'd like to stay here, then you are welcome to stay," she explained, smiling throughout the entire explanation. But it also brought a smile to my face to hear this. This woman was welcoming and sweet. What better place to stay than here with her?
Nodding, I smiled at her and gripped the doorknob. "Thank you. I'll come back after my hunt and maybe we can start to talk a little bit more," I said before opening the door and walking out into the misty afternoon, clouds hiding the sun from shining upon my skin.
At least the Cullens wouldn't find me. They probably were glad to think that I was dead. They wouldn't have to have me as a burden anymore…
Carlisle's Point of View
We'd been running for what seemed like an eternity but we didn't stop. We couldn't stop. This was Bella's life that we were talking about. We needed to bring her back. She belonged in this family. And we needed to make sure that she was in fact safe and alive.
After a few hours, we had finally arrived at the location of Alice's vision. And she was right. There was a small wooden cabin just a few feet away from the cliff's edge. I had known this house very well. It brought a lot of old friendly memories, which also brought a small smile to my face when seeing it.
Esme must have seen the change in me, for she looked in my direction and placed her hand in mine, letting me turn my head to look her deep in the eyes. "You really do know this place, don't you?" she asks in a small and soft voice.
Nodding, I looked back at the wooden cabin and squeezed Esme's hand once. "I spent a lot of time visiting here. It's a welcoming place and the person living here may be able to answer our questions, so long as the help is willingly given."
"I can smell Bella's scent all around here. She must be close," Edward said, the frown never leaving his face. He was devastated when Bella had left running from the house, thinking that he didn't love her anymore, and now, his resolve to get her back was stronger than ever. She needed to come back to us… We needed her. My son needed her. "But I can't pinpoint in which direction she went."
"It's alright, there seems to be someone inside so maybe we can ask them?" Emmett offered, searching around in hopes of stumbling upon Bella's form in the forest. If we could only talk to her and explain everything… then it would be a step in the right direction.
Nodding, I walked over to the wooden door and knocked, waiting for the sound of light footsteps to approach the door. As memory served, the footsteps were the same as all those decades ago. They were light and graceful, just like Esme's. And when the door opened, my eyes fell upon the blonde woman in front of us, looking from my family members before finally falling upon me.
A small smile came to my face when seeing her lean against the doorframe. She had never changed. "Hello Edna," I said in a soft voice, remembering every detail of my old friend.
"Hello Carlisle. What a surprise."
Ok so what did you guys think? Good? Bad? Could be better? Please let me know in some REVIEWS! And now that I have gotten inspiration for this chapter again, the next chapter should be coming in soon :D So please REVIEW!