Dia's Guide to impressing a Lady

CommonerShipping (Dia/DiamondxPlatinum/Platina) oneshot requested by Munchlax Jr.

Impressing a lady is hard, right? I don't mean any lady, though. Not a mature woman, but a really really rich female who was raised with the best lessons in etiquette and all that other stuff regular people like me don't get taught. To really get their attention, you have to be equally rich or even richer with all the latest fashions, cars, accessories...you get the idea. You have to know how to talk their manner, to walk with an air of high class and be able to get into all the cool places.

That's what I always thought. But then I met Lady Platina. She wasn't really interested in other people's riches or how other people spoke. As me and Pearl really got to know her, I realized she preferred our Manzai stand ups and unpredictable adventure to her high class way of life. She got over her snobbish ways (which never bugged me, since I always knew she was a real lady and not a tour guide, unlike Pearl) and we all became equals.

And we started dating.

I know. You're probably wondering, "how did someone like Dia impress a lady to get her to actually go on a date with him?" To be honest, I really don't know. I had always admired her from the first moment I laid eyes on her. I always supported her and stayed by her side. I even cooked for her, which she really seemed to like. I also never lost my temper in front of her (can't say the same for Pearl). Even my lame jokes earned a few giggles from her, which she always denied. But I still heard them. I just didn't confront her about them.

I finally got the courage to ask her for a date, even though I was expecting rejection. That and the fact Pearl dared me to ask her out, thinking I WAS going to get rejected. To both our surprises, she actually accepted and I actually had to think of a place to take her.

Uh, wait. Correction.

I HAVE to think of a place to take her.

Yeah. Uh, see...when I said we started dating, I lied. This is going to be our first date. And Pearl is no help, either.

I told Platina I'd pick her up at five o'clock and take her somewhere. She asked me if she should dress formally and I told her she didn't have to. (It's not like I have the money to take her somewhere fancy!) It's four thirty and I only have thirty minutes to think of a good place for a first date. I've never asked a girl out before and I never thought I would, either (much less Platina).

So here I am at home. Pearl's gone to the Battle Tower to see his dad and Platina's waiting for me to come and get her. I weigh my possibilities out in my head.

The contest hall? No, it's too far. I don't have a flying pokemon and neither does she.

Lake Valor and the dining area? Too expensive for me and too far.

The Great Marsh? Arg, STILL too far!

I really regretted not having a flying Pokemon that could fly both Platina and myself somewhere better.

Four thirty five. Time's starting to slip out of my fingers. I better hurry up.

"Munchlax!!" I turned to see Beh hand me a donut. The little glutton had three in his mouth already and probably had some behind his back. I accepted the donut and ate it, still trying to think of a nice location.

"Beh, where do you think I should take Platina?" I asked.

"Munch?" Beh tilted his head.

"Pearl dared me to ask her out, thinking I was going to get rejected. But she actually accepted. Now I need to think of a good place for her and I to go..."

Beh's eyes looked vacant. Then he suddenly brightened up and pointed to the TV in the living room. He picked up a copy of my Proteinman Omega DVD and waved it around. "Munch! Munchlax!!"

"You think we should just stay here?" I asked. Beh nodded. "Just stay here and watch TV?" Beh shook his head this time and also pointed to the kitchen.


"I don't get it," I said. Beh slapped his head and grabbed my favourite cookbook. "Um...you want me to...cook for her here?" Beh brightened up and nodded. "Well...I guess we could do that, but I don't want her to get bored..." I said thoughtfully.

"Munchlaaaaaax!" Now Beh was at the window and pointing outside at something. I went over to the window and saw he was pointing in the direction of Lake Verity.

"Uh, you think we should...I still don't get it," I confessed.

Four forty. Really running out of time now.

Beh picked up an old picture book of mine and flipped through it. He found a picture and pointed to it. The picture had a couple sitting on a lake's edge and watching the lake while the moon shone down gently on them and the stars sparkled in the water's surface. It really did look romantic. For a second I pictured Platina and I sitting on Lake Verity's edge, watching the moonlight...counting the stars...moving in close...

"Beh, you're a genius!" I shouted. It was perfect! Hopefully Platina will love it. She wasn't the easiest person to impress, but girls really like that romantic stuff, right?

I brushed the crumbs off my shirt and checked the clock. Shoot! Four forty five! Sandgem Town wasn't a far walk, but I didn't want to be late picking her up. I left Roo and Moo to watch the house and I ran out to Route 201, picking up some flowers along the way for her. Lee helped me cut through the grass to avoid bugging the wild Pokemon and save time. I lept through the trees to keep out of the sights of the youngsters who were always itching for a battle. When I finally leapt out of the trees and into the entrance of Sandgem Town, I was covered with leaves, twigs and stains.

Not. Good. NOT GOOD! The leaves and twigs could come off, but not the stains. I checked my Poketech and, to my relief, there was ten minutes left. Lee helped me pick off the leaves and twigs and tried to scrub out the stains with his tongue, but Lickiliky saliva doesn't exactly do the job like laundry detergent. The stains just got darker. I heaved a sigh and decided to face Platina as I was.

I knocked on the door of Platina's huge manor and got ready to face her. But instead of facing her, someone else answered the door.

Now let me tell you something else. Making first impressions are really REALLY important. It's not just the lady you're trying to impress when it comes to a date. There's also someone else who's probably a billion times harder to please and can pretty much determine if you'll ever see the lady again or not.

The father.

Sir Berlitz was standing in the doorframe and he looked less than impressed with my appearance. I decided against asking if I could come in and I just said I was here for Platina.

"Ah yes, she's been expecting you, Diamond." Sir Berlitz's lips were pursed together. "She's just looking for her hat. But while you're here, I must ask you. What are your intentions with my daughter?" he demanded.

Bad sign. It's only been one minute and he already doesn't like me. He also didn't ask me to come inside either, which also didn't look good in my favour. Lying would be a bad idea at this moment, so I went for honesty.

"I think she's a very sweet girl and someone I would like to get to know a bit more on a higher level than friends," I answered. Really, I have no idea where those words came from. They just sounded right in my head. I didn't want to sound like some pig or idiot, especially in front of Platina's father.

My words seemed to work. Sir Berlitz looked less tense and his lips weren't white anymore.

"Daddy? Is Diamond here?" That was Platina's voice.

"Yes, Platinum." Sir Berlitz moved aside and Platina came up beside him, looking as gorgeous as ever. She accepted the flowers with a smile and I felt good for making up for my bad looks. I noticed she didn't dress fancy at all, she was just wearing her regular outfit. That's good. I liked her regular outfit the best. She turned a simple skirt, dark vest and white shirt with a red scarf into something lovely on her. Even if the skirt was a little too short.

Hey, I swear I'm not thinking dirty thoughts!

After she set the flowers in a vase, we headed off. Sir Berlitz made me promise him to have Platina home before nine, which I accepted. It would be four hours of just me and Platina together. By ourselves. I started to get nervous. Do rich people hold hands in public? They usually call that a public display of affection and that gets people talking, but Platina didn't seem to mind. Or at least I think so. Why? She just slipped her hand into mine!

"So Dia...what are we doing tonight?" she asked.

I liked Beh's idea of watching TV at my place, but now I was worried that Platina wouldn't like the idea. Still, I had nothing else.

"W-Well I was thinking we could go back to my place and watch some movies. And I'll cook dinner for us as well," I said, trying to mask nervousness.

Instead of freaking out, like I had expected, Platina just nodded. "Sounds fun! I do like your cooking, Dia."


"Great! Let's head over to Twinleaf Town. Uh...you don't mind walking? It's not very far..." I forgot she usually used her Rapidash as transportation for even short distances. But it didn't even look like she was carrying Pokeballs on her right now.

"No, I don't mind. It's only walking," she said. "I do wonder how you got those grass stains, Dia."


"Well, er..." I indicated Lee. "Lee and I went swinging through the trees to get to your place faster and to avoid the wild Pokemon and trainers. I forgot how messy it can be..."

"Swinging through the trees?" Platina's eyes lit up. "That sounds like fun! Could we try it together?"

"But you'll get all messed up like I did!" I protested. "What about your clothes? And you might get scratched. You're not as covered up as I am."

"That's okay," Platina said. "Remember, I've been through far worse, Dia. You have too."

"Oh, right..." I was still unsure. But I could see how much Platina wanted to, so I had Lee carry both of us and use his long tongue to swing again. After the first tree, I completely forgot about my worries. Platina was laughing happily and she was enjoying herself. I should be, too, so I joined in with my own laughter.

As I predicted, we both were covered in forestry. In my case, it was again. Platina giggled and pulled a leaf out of my hair.

"That was so much fun, Dia. We should do that again!"

"Maybe we will," I grinned. My stomach rumbled. "Mmm, I think it's time for dinner."

Platina's eyes lit up. "What's on the menu? And can I help? I never get to help the cooks with the food at home..."

I was surprised. Again. Maybe she was too used to being treated like a princess that she just wanted to see how someone like me lived.

"Sure. What would you like to eat tonight?" I asked. "You know me, I'll eat anything."

"Well...I've never had a cheeseburger before," Platina shyly confessed. I stared in disbelief. "Could we make cheeseburgers?"

Wow. Maybe this was going to be easier than I thought. I agreed and Platina squeezed my hand in delight. The simplest things were making her really excited right now. It was amazing and kind of awesome.

We got to my house and Beh handed me my chef's hat, anxious to see what I was going to cook up. He jumped for joy when I announced cheeseburgers and looked surprised to hear Platina was going to help me. I got out the right ingredients and showed Platina how to make burger patties with her hands.

"It feels slimy..." Platina said. "Like a Ditto!"

I laughed and started up the stove. "How many do you want?"

"Um...how many do you normally eat?" she asked. I flushed red and said I could eat three, but most people usually eat just one. "Alright, I'll only have one."

Beh held up three small claws, indicating he wanted three burgers too. Against my better judgement, I decided to just eat two. I spiced the meat patties that Platina prepared with some seasoning and started sizzling them. Once we had six, I reminded Platina to wash her hands and then I got out the vegetables.

"I like to put a bit of everything in my burgers. Tomatoes, onions, lettuce, pickles...I'll give you a tomato to slice and I'll take care of the onion."

"What about the meat?" Platina asked. I indicated Beh who was standing on a stool with the spatula and watching the burgers closely.

"Beh knows when to flip the meat, so it won't burn," I said.

"Such talent!" Platina exclaimed. We started slicing our vegetables, but I forgot the problem with slicing onions. They can really make the eyes sting when you're not used to it. I am, so the juice didn't bug me so much, but I noticed Platina was rubbing her eyes every few seconds. Whoops...

"Sorry, Platina," I said sheepishly. "Onions make people tear up when you're not used to the juice. Here, I'll move away..."

"Thanks...um, where's your bathroom? I think I should rinse my eyes out," Platina said. I pointed her towards my really tiny bathroom (compared to whatever she has, I'm sure) and kept chopping. Beh flipped the burgers and licked his lips. I could tell he wanted to eat the meat as is but the last time he did that, he got really sick. I'm sure he remembered that.

Platina came back out and was surprised to see I had started chopping her tomato. I decided to have her wash the lettuce and peel some leaves out. Soon we had a plate full of things to stuff in our burgers and Beh yelped to tell me the meat was almost ready. I got him to flip it one more time and I unwrapped some cheese slices and put them on the meat.

"Doing it like this will melt them into the meat, making it tastier," I explained.

"Sounds great!" Platina's enthusiasm hadn't died. She watched the cheese melt into the meat and I turned the stove off. I still couldn't believe that I had made burgers for a first date dinner. I thought I'd end up slaving over something big and fancy with a lot of courses for her.

Maybe this was some kind of trick.

I had another idea. From our dining room table, it was possible to see the TV. I flicked it on, along with the DVD player and I put in Proteinman Omega. Dinner and a movie all at once? I didn't know how Platina would like it, but I sure like the idea. I glanced up at her and she was watching with interest. Good. I grabbed the remote and set it down on the table and Beh flipped the meat into the burger buns.

"Now we just put whatever we want in them," I explained, getting out ketchup and mayonnaise. I loaded my burgers with everything and Platina put tomatoes, ketchup, lettuce and mayo in hers, completely ignoring the onions. We sat down at the table while Beh filled his burgers with the leftover vegetables and stuffed them in his mouth.

Platina took a bite of her burger. "Whoa, this is great! I wish I had known how good these taste before."

"Heh," I chuckled. "They're a good fast to make kind of food and they can be healthy too." Why was I blabbing on about this? Burgers weren't always healthy, especially if you bought them at places like McLax's or Burger Slowking's. Making them at home, though...that's a different story.

The movie started and we ate our burgers in silence. Once our plates were empty, I put them away and we moved to the couch. On the screen, Proteinman was blasting away bad guys and saving the world. Platina and I joined in on the theme song whenever it came on. It was really beginning to get fun and, without realizing it, I had put my arm around her shoulders. I only realized where my arm was when she put her head on my shoulder, close to my chest.

The movie ended later and I flicked it off. Platina yawned and stretched, saying she felt restless. Perfect.

"Want to go for a walk, then?"

"I'd like that, yes. Where to?"

"How about Lake Verity?" I asked. Beh flashed me a thumbs up behind Platina's back. "It's a clear night, so it should be, uh..." Romantic was the only word that came to mind, but what if that sounded too forward? Really, even if I have a crush on her, I didn't want to push her into something uncomfortable. Then I'd really lose her. "Nice," I finally said.

"Alright," she said. Is it my imagination or did she sound a little...hesitant? What happened to the enthusiasm she had earlier with the "Sounds great!" or squeezing my hand?

Maybe she was just tired. Or maybe I was too boring for her.

I left my Pokemon in charge of the house again and we headed out to the lake. Her hand was back in mine again and I could feel her shaking. That was odd. The night wasn't even cool, let alone cold. I couldn't figure it out.

We got to the lake's edge. The moonlight was shining down clearly and the stars were dotted in the reflection of the water. It was just like the picture Beh showed me. I sat down, pulled off my shoes and socks and rolled my pants up so I could put my feet in the water. Platina was still taking in the sights with a look of awe. She had seen Lake Acuity under the harsh snows up near Snowpoint City, but this lake was different. It wasn't all primmed up like Lake Valor, but it was quiet, save for the soft chirps from Kricketunes and Kricketots. There was nobody nearby, either.

Isolation. That's what made Lake Verity the best lake out of the three.

"It's so lovely...there's nothing as beautiful as this near Sandgem Town..." Platina said.

"But you live right on a beach line, right?" I asked.

"Yes, but it's always crowded by people wanting to swim or have parties. It's never quiet and it doesn't have this natural beauty," she replied. She sat next to me and pulled off her boots and socks as well. "I'm...really glad you asked me here, Dia."

"I'm glad you accepted, Platina," I answered honestly. "I...I know it wasn't really the best time tonight..."

"No no, I did have fun." she assured me. "Admittedly, there are better things to do out there, but it was nice just staying at your home and, well...being with you."

I didn't imagine that. Someone reassure me I didn't imagine that. I was sure I was blushing and I hoped it was dark enough that she couldn't see my face.

"Y-You know, you didn't have to accept me asking you...I-I mean I would have been okay if y-you had said no..." What was I saying?! No, I wouldn't have!

"Dia?" Platina faced me. "What are you saying?"



Double crap.


"No, you said something," Platina was taking on the airs of a lady and I started to sweat. "What do you mean by you would have been okay if I said no?"

"Um...er...well...I actually wasn't...you know...I wasn't expecting you to say yes..." I felt horrible. Here I was, admitting to The Lady that I thought she would tell me no. Why couldn't I just keep my mouth shut? "I thought I'd...be too boring for you..."

"Dia...listen," Platina said softly. Uh oh, I was going to get it now. "Do you want to know why I accepted your date? You're right, I could have said no. But I didn't want to."

"Wh-why?" I stammered.

"Because I like you, Dia," Platina earnestly said. "I really like you."


"Um...I'm really glad that you do..." What to say now? I had NO idea.

"Dia, I don't think you get it."


"I like you enough to want to spend time with you without Pearl around. I really like you, Dia. Being with you makes me happy and gives me sich a lift."

"W-well...I'm glad I can make you happy and laugh and, um..."

"You do, Dia. You give my heart such a great feeling," Platina said, staring at me. I realized her face was really close to mine and I could feel the heat coming off her skin.

Oh. My. Gosh.

She was blushing.

NOW I finally got it. Now was the perfect time to admit how I really felt.

"Plat? I, um...have a confession to make," I said.

Here goes nothing.

"Pearl dared me to ask you out."

"What??" Platina's beautiful eyes widened. "How could he?? Why?!"

Oh shoot. This was not happening the way I thought it would in my head. I quickly added, "Because he knew how much I love you but was too nervous and shy to ask you on my own."

Platina stopped ranting. The heat came back off her face. Good, my words did the trick again. I decided to forget words and just follow through with my emotions. I cupped her face in my hands and kissed her lips. She didn't respond at first, probably still shocked, but I pulled away and she begged me to kiss her again.

"Dia, I love you too."

I still don't know how I did it. Impressing a real Lady, that is. But when you stay true to your emotions and give romance a shot, I guess you can impress anyone. I don't really know. All I know is I'm going to make Platina my girlfriend and go out on a lot more dates with her.

If her father decides I'm good enough for her, that is.


And there you have it. My second CommonerShipping story. Hope you loved it, Munchlax Jr.! I had a great time writing this and I love it.

This is probably the longest oneshot I've written in a LONG time. Whew!

Reviews are loved as always.

-Moonlit Assassin