I Hate That I Love You – CH 5: Execution
I didn't understand how I felt the blood go through my veins, and my breaths to come quick and shallow. I even felt that pain in my neck that should have ended me for good… and it seemed as if it were disappearing by the second. I was rising from underneath the black pond, reaching the light again. It was plain to see that I was given another chance to live.
I, Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez, didn't deserve to live.
After a minute, I could open my eyes just a tiny bit when I put full force into doing so. A simple task like opening your eyes was a challenge at my current state, let alone trying to get up and comprehend what was happening. I realized I was in my room and it welcomed me back with comfort and darkness. Then I saw a sheet of gold that arched above me. I've seen this gold sheet before…
Damn that Orihime.
I waited another minute to be able to turn my head to the side, I could open my eyes effortlessly now too, although that pain that coursed through me still lingered. As I expected, the girl was on her knees and was beside me. She placed her hands against the sheet. Her face was streaked with tears and her lip quivered as she watched me recover.
I hated to see her cry—she should know that.
"S-Stop crying," I croaked. My voice was gruff yet gentle; maybe because I was in too much pain to sound repulsive again.
She wiped her tears away quickly with one hand. "Sorry."
"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" My voice still remained controlled and gentle, even with a curse that could usually make her flinch. I hated everything that was happening.
She answered me with the obvious. "Healing you, Grimmjow-san."
I snickered, sending a sharp pain to my chest. She shouldn't shed a single tear for me. I rolled my head back to look at the ceiling, and closed my eyes to listen to her heartbeat—my favourite sound. I let her continue. If I was so determined in dying, I would get up and find some way to rip her magic little fairies apart. I let her, because I just wanted to listen to this sound for a little while longer.
I didn't know how long it was until she took down the arching gold sheet, but I counted two hundred and fifty-six heartbeats. I felt new and refreshed by the end. Just the way I left like when I was with her and only her…
"Get up, Grimmjow," that irritating and familiar voice commanded behind me. Not the voice I wanted to be greeted with after recovering. It was too familiar and it stuck to my head, even if I disliked hearing it.
I opened my eyes and glared at his direction, meeting his cold, glassy stare. Then, I slowly got up on my feet meticulously while keeping the gaze. "I suppose you were the one who sent Orihime to heal me. I should've figured."
"Yes, because it would be unwise to kill a brother that belonged to serve under Aizen-sama—even if they acted childish."
I felt like slicing him up into tiny pieces, because he was feeling a little pity for me. I could smell it. Who the fuck would bring an enemy back to life after killing them? He's rubbing it in my face, isn't he? He brought me back to life just to prove that he won. This "brother" nonsense is just a bunch of bullshit.
"No really," I dug my hands in my pocket, "what's the catch?"
"You know me very well, I see. The real reason is that Aizen-sama has called both of you in his office. You know, the one you call his Throne Room. He ordered me command Orihime to heal you. I know that wouldn't be a problem since you two have created a tight bond," he explained.
Orihime's eyes grew wide. I simply stared at him in disgust. I knew he couldn't keep Aizen away for long. I suddenly imagined pounding him against the wall until his skull cracked open.
"What the hell does he need us for? What's the purpose behind all this?" I demanded.
"He is scheduling an execution based on the current situation and what you have to say for yourselves," Ulquiorra said in his monotone, like this was a walk through the park.
"An execution? For who?" Orihime asked, digging her nails in her hand with her tight fists.
"Grimmjow, of course," he answered.
I snickered. So he wanted to see Aizen kill me instead…
"No!" the girl lurched to her feet.
Before she could reach me, Ulquiorra swiftly grabbed her shoulders and he pushed her down until she stumbled to the floor. He was taking advantage of her weakness. I was momentarily surprised when Orihime tried to kick Ulquiorra away when he grabbed the top of her head and yanked her hair.
"Is it futile to avoid it, Orihime," he told her.
"I don't want to see Grimmjow-san die because of me!" she wailed.
"Relax, Hime-chan. It's not the end of the world... for you," I said calmly. It was for me.
Ulquiorra covered her mouth with his rough hand before she could say more.
"Cooperate, please, Orihime. You won't be hurt in this situation at all," he said in an effort to make her shut up.
I didn't even try to escape or make a run for it—I obediently walked along my "brother's" side as he pulled Orihime along with him, trapping her in an arm twist as he still kept his hand on her mouth. She sent signals to me with her eyes, telling me she was sorry and that I needed to run. I just ignored them. Hell, I knew it was going to end for me someday, I just didn't know it was because of a pathetic human girl.
I didn't know what I was being sentenced for exactly, but it had to do with the chick. Maybe he suspected I screwed her that night I was in her room. There were strict rules against abusing the girl that Aizen set out to us. Of course it wouldn't matter once he no longer needed her. Ulquiorra walked in and he saw her clothes on that night… of course, he wouldn't mention that important detail.
Ulquiorra had enough of her screaming and mumbling on his hand. "Orihime, that's enough! You know full well that if you speak out of term, you will join Grimmjow to your death as well!" He was bluffing. Aizen would never just throw away his secret weapon to his success all because she was rude. He had other methods if that ever happened.
Finally, we reached the big doors to his Throne Room or what Ulquiorra named it Aizen-sama's Office. It called me by name, inviting me in. I gladly took its invitation. Was I ready to die? I asked myself. Yes. And for what exactly? The girl obviously. I was fucking messed in the brain. The girl did something to me! She was like a drug that I kept coming back for. She bewitched me. Maybe those hair pins did it and had some kind of power like that. It would be better for her if I was gone. It would be better for me if I never saw her again.
I pushed the door aside and came in like I was ready to play hop-scotch with Aizen. He lumbered in his chair and rested his chin on one hand. His fingers spread on the side of his face like spider legs. The man's eyes showed boredom. By his side were Tōsen and Ichimaru like always.
"What do you need me for, boss?" I asked nonchalantly.
In the background, I could hear Orihime's muffled screams.
"Be silent and kneel!" Ulquiorra commanded as he released her and got on the floor.
In fear of Aizen's presence, she followed with gritted teeth.
"I know you know that you're going to die. Don't be so casual about it, Jaegerjaquez," he said, moving only his lips.
I shrugged. "Yeah, I know. Why'd you bring the girl?"
He scowled at my flippant tone. In all the Espadas, I was the one who rarely treated him like the king he thought he was. I treated him more like an old pal and I ignored the knowledge that he could kill me in a second if he desired. "Because Orihime Inoue is part of the problem and I need answers. Shall we begin your trial?"
Ulquiorra went to stand in the far back as Orihime—with shaky legs—stood alone somewhere to my left.
"Were you, or were you not in Inoue's room at night?" he asked.
"I was," I admitted. No hesitations whatsoever. Let's get this over with, shall we?
"Why?" he switched gazes to Orihime.
"B-Because… I called Grimmjow-san over to tell him… about your original plan that you have told me," she stuttered. That girl is just hoping we can squeeze out of this with the truth.
"Ahh, yes—the one that you had been upset over. Is that correct, Grimmjow?"
"That's... partly true. Well, I just came over because I fucking felt like it." Lie.
"That doesn't explain why Ulquiorra walked in and saw a hugging feast. I specifically told everyone what no one must bother or plan to manipulate the girl their own way. She's part of us now, remember?"
Right, right. Then why are you going to throw her away when you're done with her? I wanted to say. But I would only end up dead faster. "I said I did that because I felt like it—nothing more." More lies. "And hell, I'm not manipulating her." It seemed like she was manipulating me.
Orihime gasped and looked up at me with disbelieving eyes. "No! Grimmjow-san, please don't lie!" She turned back to Aizen. "I was the one who—!"
He interrupted her, clearly bored with the back-and-forth going on here. "Why?"
"Because he was comforting me while I cried!" She believed that the truth would set us free... it would, possibly... I just didn't want to be free anymore.
Ichimaru and Tōsen exchanged a look as Aizen chuckled softly. "Please, Orihime, we want the truth."
"I am telling the truth!" she insisted.
"Grimmjow comforted you? You're kiddin' right?" Ichimaru laughed too.
"Now, now, Gin. We haven't asked Grimmjow if what she's saying is true or not." Aizen nodded at my direction.
I scowled. "You think I want to be hugged? The chick just came at me."
Orihime looked at me with watery eyes. Then she clasped her hands together in front of her chest. "G-Grimmjow-san! You comforted me just by being there!"
"Here's another question for you Grimmjow: Why do you visit the girl regularly? It's unlike you. Unless of course, you were planning something form the start."
I completely snapped, letting all the bundled anger out. People had began to misunderstand me already. "It's not! I don't know what the fuck is wrong with me! That bitch did something to me!" I pointed at her with a white-knuckled finger. "She's making me draw closer and closer to her each moment we're together! Hell, I don't even know who I am anymore!" Then I dropped to my knees in defeat. "Just kill me already, Aizen!" I yelled, my voice echoing off the walls in the large room.
She got me. I'm admitting it. She got me. I want it to stop. No matter how hard I want to be with Orihime, I can't deny that I, Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez, am in love with Orihime Inoue.
"Grimmjow-san!" she wanted to come at me and embrace me all over again.
I gave her a death glare that made her freeze on the spot. "Stay away from me, woman! I'll kill you! You're the one who's ruining me!"
"Jaegerjaquez!" Aizen exclaimed.
I ignored him, and so did she.
She took a step toward me. Part of me wanted to hold her forever, yet part of me wanted to kill her. It was more like me to kill relentlessly than to succumb to a human girl. So I went with that... I got to my feet growled under my breath and unsheathed my Zampaktou. She stared at me in horror. As soon as I took a step, I crossed swords with Ulquiorra Cifer.
"Step back, Jaegerjaquez. Are you trying to get killed?" he said.
Hell yeah, I mentally answered. But I didn't have to listen to him. I kept gathering all my strength into pushing number four back so I could kill the girl. He was stronger—he's already killed me once. In result, I skidded back and slammed into the wall.
Three things happened simultaneously: Tōsen raced to me with his weapon handy, ready to kill me on the spot. Ichimaru held Ulquiorra back from attacking. Orihime ran toward me from behind Ulquiorra. On his throne, Aizen grinned.
All I heard next was her screaming: "Sōten Kisshun!" Then the same golden sheet divided my body and Tōsen's weapon from each other.
I was breathless. Orihime knew I wanted to kill her, yet she defended me. What the fuck was going on? What was she trying to prove to everyone?
"I refuse to see the world without a Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez!" I hadn't noticed she wrapped her thin arms around me from my left side. "You'll just have to kill me too!"
My glistening, and sharp blade was within my reach and the girl was here by my side...
I could kill her...
But I didn't and held still instead, letting her touch me. I refused to see the world without an Orihime Inoue.
She removed the shield and challenged Tōsen to kill both of us. "Do it if you want to!"
It was refreshing to see Tōsen with an expression of defeat. He dropped his weapon and it clang on the marble floor.
A/N: How did the action go in this chapter? Was it as nail-bitting as I hoped? Look forward to the next chapter! There will definitely be a turn of events