Wario Eats Explosive Prunes
Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus: Well, this was requested, and I am one not to disappoint. So, this is for you, oh great requestor. And besides, I needed to do something like this. Plus, it gives me even more ideas! And now, due to a certain someone, I'm updating the fanfic once more. So there.
PS: And this is technically more Waluigi and Princess Daisy than Wario... I don't like Wario as much as those two. Sorry, guys.
Disclaimer: Waluigi, Princess Daisy, and Wario all belong to Nintendo. As does anything else in this fanfic.
It was a nice, normal day in the Mushroom Kingdom...
"EH HE HE HE HE HE! GET A LOAD OF THIS!"
...It WAS a nice day in the Mushroom Kingdom.
Wario, the usual idiot jerk with a heart of garlic and a lust for greed, was munching down on several prunes that were lying on the grass. Waluigi, who was walking with Wario earlier, only shook his head as he facepalmed himself, sighing as he hoped no one would notice. The two were in the far eastern portion of the grassy Mushroom Meadows.
"Come on, Wario!" Waluigi insisted as he tried pulling Wario by the suspenders of his purple overalls, trying his best to chug his fat friend with him, "All we were doing was looking for some loot! We're not here to have some stupid feast!"
Wario bellowed at Waluigi as he pushed the taller plumber away, finishing up the last of the prunes. "Shut up, Waluigi! I do what I want and I-" He then farted, being blasted straight into the clear blue sky!
Waluigi rolled his eyes as he watched Wario tumble back down, landing flat on his head. He pointed at Wario and sneered, "See? Now come on, time's a wasting."
Wario grumbled angrily as he began following Waluigi eastward, eager to find some treasue. At every two minutes, however, Wario would be blasted into the sky again by an explosive fart, and Waluigi noticed that it wasn't the usual kind of farts Wario did. The two suddenly bumped into Princess Daisy, who was also on a walk for no reason.
"Hiya, guys!" Daisy pleaded as she winked at Wario, much to Waluigi's surprise.
Wario was about to respond, when he farted so loud, it blasted him several feet into the air, and caused him to fall into the river nearby. He farted within the river, causing the entire stream to bubble up as it went from peaceful clear blue to disgusting yellow green, killing all of the underwater dwelling creatures.
Waluigi and Daisy both looked at each other in disgust and shock as Wario was sent blasting straight out of the river, ricocheting amongst the Mushroom Meadows as the farts he pooted out were getting wackier and wackier, causing the entire meadows to become disorted and out of whack.
"Wa-lu-igi, I-I'm n-n-ot f-f-f-feeling well..." Daisy stuttered as she tried holding back her nausea, of which was caused by the disortion.
Waluigi was not affected, luckily, but he and Daisy did cover their ears as they then heard a loud beeping sound, followed by some strange murmer with pianos being slammed in the background. As the colors of the Mushroom Meadows began fading and going in strange directions, the path was suddenly levetated from the ground, and a loud, bloodcurling woman scream was heard as Wario continued farting. Finally, after three minutes of the insanity, the entire place froze in its tracks, and Wario landed flat on the blank piece that was in the path's place.
"Phew! Glad that's-a over," Wario laughed as he glanced at Waluigi and Daisy, who still covered their ears.
Wario then farted one more time, this time exploding as his guts went all over the place. Waluigi and Daisy screamed as they held onto each other, being blasted away by the fart, of which caused the entire background to collaspe on itself as nothing remained, the disortion stopping fully.
Daisy gasped as she turned around to face her window on her right, gasping frantically as she saw the sun shining through her window. She then picked up her alarm clock, and let out a sigh of relief, stating, "Oh... it was just a dream... thank goodness."
Daisy then got up and stretched, letting out a loud burp followed by a loud fart as Daisy took off her orange pajamas and placed on her sports shorts, remarking as she rubbed her stomach, "Man, oh man, is that the last time I try prunes from Funky Kong! Bleh!"
"Hey Daisy!" Toadette spoke outside of Daisy's house. "Are you gonna come hang out with me today?"
"...Today's not a good time, Toadette!" Daisy exclaimed in response as she tripped, landing flat on her face as she groaned in pain.
THE NEXT DAY
Daisy and Waluigi were both trying to get rid of some hiccups that Waluigi somehow picked up from several Eggplantmen nearby. Needless to say, their efforts weren't so grand.
"Oh, blast those idiot vegetables!" Waluigi cursed as he hiccuped, the bubbles popping into tiny explosions that shook the area a bit as he tried to control himself, "If they weren't -hic- running around with their dumb bubble blowing -cup- wands, none of -cup- this would be happening!" His last hiccup was powerful enough to cause a few maple trees nearby to burst into flames.
Daisy tried rubbing Waluigi on the back, but it didn't seem to help as Waluigi hiccuped again, causing the green steel bench to collapse on itself. She sighed as she shook her head. "Oh, I'm sorry, Wally, but I don't know how we'll fix up this mess!"
Waluigi quickly pulled out a bottle of fresh water and tried sipping some, but he accidentally dropped the entire bottle from another hiccup, the fresh contents of the water splattered amongst the hard cold ground. He facepalmed himself as he tried thinking what to do.
Daisy was about to think as well, when her stomach growled loudly, prompting her to blush as she giggled nervously, somewhat embarrassed as she placed her right hand on her stomach. "Oh! This hiccup nonsense made me hungry again! Why don't we try getting some grub to help calm those hiccups down?"
Waluigi hiccuped again, and as he was about to agree, Wario came rushing by, pushing Waluigi into the bushes as he entered a nearby wooden outhouse, slamming the door shut as he let out a big fart, sighing of relief. Daisy sweatdropped nervously as Waluigi rubbed the back of his head from the bushes, moaning as he hiccuped, causing him to fall back down into the rusty bushes. Daisy tried picking Waluigi up, but another powerful gas blast from Wario caused Daisy to fall into the bushes herself.
"Oh man, those burritos sure do the trick!" Wario stated as he felt the old stale toilet becoming overflowing with his... brown chocolate... "This is the last time I order something from those Dino Wrenches!" He farted once more, causing the toilet to become even more overflown with the disgusting substance.
Daisy rubbed the back of her head as Waluigi hiccuped again, this time causing a maple tree behind them to fall right on top of them. Daisy popped her head out of the bark, moaning as she began seeing stars, when her stomach growled again, prompting her to eat something. Desperate, and seeing a few ripe apples on the tree, she got out and began plucking them, when she fell into the leaves due to Waluigi hiccuping again, which was strong enough to cause the fallen tree to catch on fire. Added by another loud fart from Wario, which was apparently powerful enough to cause the entire outhouse to explode, Daisy yelped as she ran around in circles, screaming as she held her butt, not knowing that her entire body was caught on fire.
Wario blinked, and he took a quick glance at the toilet, seeing that he still had on his purple overalls. He thought it over for a few seconds... and shrugged as he continued ripping through, causing the entire park to become polluted as all of the inhabitants of its former beauty were forced to flee eastbound, leaving behind their formerly beautiful home, which was by now covered with the disgusting yellow fog of Wario's gas, followed by the explosive bubbles formed by Waluigi's hiccups. Poor Daisy still continued running about screaming, as she inadventurely caused the plant life to catch on fire from coming into contact with them, still hungry as her stomach constantly reminded her.
Nearby, Bowser and Bowser Junior were watching the madness occur from their castle using binoculars, and they looked at each other, laughing heartily as they gave each other a high five, their totally depraved, evil, insidious scheme working.