Author's Note:

WARNING: Twilight and MySpace bashing. Just warning you. Also, if you want to know what was real and what is fake read the author's comments at the bottom. Now on to the interview!


Me: Hi!

Raven: Hi.

Me: Hi!

Raven: . . .Hi?

Me: Hi!

Raven: =_= Would you stop that?

Me: Yah! *nods*

Raven: . . .You ok?

Me: . Maaaaayybeeee. . .

Raven: Maybe we should do this later. . .

No! We can do it now!

Raven: Fine. Just hurry up.

Me: Ok. owo

Raven: So?

Me: So what?

Raven: The interview. . .

Me: Oh right!

Raven: *facepalm*

Me: Um. . .What's your favorite book?

Raven: Can't say.

Me: I like most vampire books.

Raven: Good for you.

Me: Except for Twilight. That's gay. XP

Raven: Okay then.

Me: What kind of vampire sparkles?

Raven: There are sparkling vampires in the book?

Me: Yep.

Raven: That is gay.

Me: Purple.

Raven: Excuse me?

Me: You're excused.

Raven: What?

Me: Huh?

Raven: What are you talking about?


Raven: o.o

Me: What do you do in your free time?

Raven: *still kind of confused* Uh. Depends. Sometimes I read, or meditate, and of course hang out with the other Titans.

Me: I like reading, too.

Raven: That's good. Reading's good for-

Me: Do you have a MySpace?

Raven: That was rude. It's not nice to interrupt someone.

Me: I'm not very nice. Now answer the question.

Raven: Fine. No, I don't have a MySpace.

Me: Good. MySpace sucks. Facebook has better apps. Do you have a Facebook?

Raven: No.

Me: Make one.

Raven: Why should I?

Me: Because I Said So. Ever seen that movie?

Raven: It's a movie?

Me: Yeah. There are sex scenes in it.

Raven: o.e Didn't need to know that. . .

Me: Have you and BB had sex yet?

Raven: . . .WTF?!

Me: That's not an answer.

Raven: Well you're not getting one. *crosses arms*

Me: Why not?

Raven: Because that's personal and private!

Me: So? I want to know!

Raven: You have no respect for other people's privacy, do you?

Me: Nope. Now have you?

Raven: . . .I told you, I'm not telling.

Me: You have, haven't you?

Raven: *blushes deeply* Uh. . .Well. . .Um. . .

Me: Haha! Caught!

Raven: So what?

Me: So how big is he?

Raven: Huh?

Me: His cock.

Raven: o.o *blushes deeper* That's none of your business.

Me: Whatever. Do you like dinosaurs?

Raven: Dinosaurs?

Me: Dinosaurs.

Raven: They're extinct.

Me: Dinosaurs.

Raven: Yes. Dinosaurs.

Me: Dinosaurs

Raven: Yeah. They died out a million years ago.

Me: Dinosaurs.

Raven: Yes. Dinosaurs.


Raven: What?!

Ember: Oh no! The crumpets!

Raven: Wait. Where'd she come from?

Me: The parlor!

Raven: The parlor?

Ember: The parlor!

Raven: What parlor?

Me: The dinosaurs are in the parlor!

Raven: What? Dinosaurs are extinct!

Ember: The parlor!

Raven: What parlor?!

Me: They're eating all the crumpets!

Ember: Oh no! The crumpets!

Raven: Why would dinosaurs eat crumpets?

Me: Now he's eating a salad.

Raven: Dinosaurs are extinct!

Me: With the wrong fork!

Ember: NOOOOOOO! The wrong fork! *faints*

Raven: The wrong fork?

Ember: Cumquats.

Raven: Cumquats?

Ember: No. Cumquats.

Raven: I just said that.

Ember: No. Cumquats.

Me: And pineapples.

Raven: Why are we talking about fruits?

Me: We aren't. We're interviewing you.

Raven: *opens mouth and closes it again* =_= You guys are freaks.

Me: We prefer the term "strange".

Raven: Whatever.

Me: What's your favorite movie?

Raven: I don't watch movies.

Me: What about Wicked Scary?

Raven: Except for that one.

Me: Did you like it?

Raven: What do you think?

Ember: That the dinosaurs drank all the tea?

Raven: I wasn't asking you.

Ember: Yes you were.

Raven: No I wasn't. I was asking her. *points to me*

Me: I'm so special!!

Raven: Yes you are. Not in a good way, though.

Ember: I wanna be special!

Raven: You're both special.

Ember: Yay!

Me: So what's your favorite movie?

Raven: I don't have one.

Me: Mine's Hancock.

Raven: That's nice.

Me: Especially the sex scene.

Illyana: Sex scene!

Raven: You're obsessed with sex scenes, aren't you? By the way, where'd she come from?

Illyana: Your mom!

Raven: . . .

Ember: Unicorns!

Me: Sparkly unicorns!

Raven: Are purely fictional.

Me: No they're not.

Ember: I have a pet unicorn.

Raven: What? No you don't!

Ember: Yes I do!

Me: I have a pet rock. owo

Raven: A pet. . .rock?

Me: Uh huh. It gave birth to pebbles last week.

Ember: Really? I wanna see!

Raven: That's impossible.

Illyana: I'm the daddy.

Raven: But you're a girl!

Illyana: So?

Me: I ate them.

Ember: Awwww :(

Raven: Why'd you do that? You could've choked!

Me: I did.

Ember: I choked on a pixy stick and died!

Raven: But you're here.

Ember: Obviously.

Raven: How?

Me: I resurrected her.

Illyana: Why?

Me: She's my buddy!

Raven: You all are weird.

Illyana: Your mom!

Me: So what's your favorite color?

Raven: Blue.

Me: Mine's purple!

Ember: Me too!

Illyana: I have AIDS!

Raven: You what?!

Me: Billy's favorite color is orange!

Illyana: I'm a hooker!

Raven: *scoots away from Illyana*

Ember: BILLY!

Me: Is a pedophile.

Raven: Who the hell is Billy?

Me: Our buddy.

Raven: You're friends with a pedophile?

Me: Nope.

Ember: We're buddies with a pedophile.

Raven: I won't be surprised if you get raped.

Me: Too late.

Ember: Already happened.

Raven: By who?

Illyana: Me!

Raven: o.o

Ember: We sang the RAPE song, but she wouldn't listen.

Raven: RAPE song?

Me: Yeah! It goes like this!

Me & Ember: Stop! Don't touch me there! That is my private square! R-A-P-E! Get your hands away from me!

Raven: I'm sorry I asked.

Rachael: Hi!

Illyana: What's up?

Raven: Who are you?

Rachael: I'm a drug addict!

Illyana: I'm an alcoholic!

Me: I though you were a hooker?

Illyana: I changed my mind.

Raven: All of you have problems.

Me: Who's your best friend?

Raven: Starfire, I guess.

Rachael: Crack's my best friend!

Illyana: I like beer.

Me: When I was a baby, I ran into a glass door and got a slight concussion.

Raven: That explains so much.

Illyana: Can we move this interview to the top of a skyscraper?

Rachael: Whoo! Skyscraper!

Me: Otay!

Raven: Why?

Me: Just c'mon!

*Forty stories up a skyscraper and on the roof later*

Me: *looks over edge* We're really high up!

Raven: *has unresistable urge to push her over* Can we just get this over with?

Me: Otay! Um. What's you favorite song? And music artist?

Illyana: P. Diddy! No! Ke$ha! No! George!

Rachael: "Trying to get a little bit typsyyyyy!"

Ember: w00t! *sways*

Raven: Evanescence. Favorite song would be Missing by Evanescence.

Me: Take it Off by Ke$ha!

Ember: Dinosaur plastique!

Me: Oh la la!

Raven: What?

Me: It's French speak!

Josie: All of you are freaks!

Me & Ember: Josie Francine!!!! XDDD

Raven: Josie Francine?

Me: He's our buddy, too!

Josie: *runs away*

Rachael: Bye Josie!

Ember: See you in French tomorrow!

Raven: *thinks about running away, too*

Illyana: Hey Rachael!

Rachael: Yeah?

Illyana: There's something really shiny on the sidewalk below!

Rachael: Really??

Me: I wanna see shiny!

Ember: No! My shiny! *slaps me*

Illyana: Yeah. Wanna take a look?

Raven: *trying to calm self*

Me: *turns around and slaps Raven*

Raven: *eyes glow red*

Rachael: Okay! *looks over edge* I can't see anything! It's too far down!

Illyana: Let me help you with that! *pushes over edge*

Me: Raven's eyes are glowing!

Ember: Coffee!

Raven: I'm out of here! *walks towards door*

Me: Noooooo! We're not done yet! *glomps*

Raven: Oof! *falls to ground* Get off of me!

Me: We're not done with the interview!

Raven: Still?

Me: *nods*

Rachael: Hey! I see it n-*splat*

Raven: What other questions do you have?

Illyana: Do you have AIDS?

Raven: What? Of course not!

Illyana: You want 'em?

Raven: NO!

Illyana: You sure?

Raven: Very.

Illyana: Okay then.

Raven: *turns to me* Will you get off now?

Me: Okay.


Ember: Popcorn.

Raven: *twitch* Can I leave now?

Me: Sure. Tell Beast Boy he's next! Come back soon!

Raven: Don't count on it. *teleports away*

Illyana: We have to go. NOW!

Me: Why?

Illyana: The cops are here.

Ember: Coffee!

End of Interview


Author's Comments:

Well there you go. My interview with Raven. Hope you liked it. I really am going to do Beast Boy next. In fact, I'm done. I just need to type it. Please Review.

Yes, I know. It was pretty perverted. Get over it.

Anyways, the facts and non-facts of the interview.


-Rachael, Illyana, Billy, Josie, and Ember are real people. They are all my friends.

-We are very random.

-Ember likes coffee.

-We are very perverted.

-We do take French. (Everyone in the story except Raven)


-Because I Said So is a movie, and does have mild sex scenes.

-Hancock is my favorite movie and it does have a mild sex scene. But that's only in the Unrated version.

-Evanescence did make a song called Missing.

-Raven would have an urge to push me off a 40 story building.

-The RAPE song is real. I did not make it up. It is actually a Girl Scout song. (Btw, thanks Ember for telling me about it!)

-Billy's favorite color is orange.

-Purple is me and Ember's favorite color.

-Me, Ember, and Rachael all like shiny things.

-I would glomp Raven.

-Ke$ha made a song called Take It Off.

-We are all very weird.

-When I was a baby, I really did run into a glass door and get a slight concussion.

-I do like reading.

-I like Facebook.

-I think MySpace sucks.

-Twilight's gay. (Not an opinion, a hardcore FACT)

-I like vampire books, just not Twilight.

Now for the made-up stuff.


-Billy is not a pedophile. That's just a joke we do.

-Ember does not have a pet unicorn.

-I do not have a pet rock.

-I have never eaten a pebble (that I know of).

-Rachael is not a drug addict.

-Illyana is not an alcoholic.

-Illyana is not a hooker.

-Illyana does not have AIDS.

-Me and Ember have never been raped.

-Ember never died from choking on a pixy stick (but she did choke on one).

-My favorite song is not Take It Off by Ke$ha. I like it, it's just not my favorite.

-Josie Francine is a guy. His real name is Joseph. We just call him Josie.

If there are anymore questions on what was real or made-up just review/comment.


Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Titans. If I did there would've been a season 6 and Raven and Beast Boy would've been together at the beginning of the series.

And for those of you who are wondering:

-Yes I had permission to make Rachael a drug addict and kill her.

-I also had permission to make Illyana an alcoholic and give her AIDS.

Until next time!