Messing With Love
"I guess it's time to practice a little… My skills are a little rusty after all these years of lazing around…" Rosa snuck a glance around before looking down at her belly. Iwonderifithadanyeffectonmybeautifulbody…
(Meanwhile, Whippy and Wevers, the Weather twins, were laughing silently from their own realm far, far away.)
"Well, it's time to practice! Let's see if I still got it!" And with that determined outburst, Rosa the God of Love cracked her fingers and went to work.
"Er, my name is Kakashi Hatake, and I am 26 years old… Here're my files…"
A slightly confused Kakashi was currently sitting in the office of Konoha Academy, a prestigious school run by a rather… unique principal, Tsunade Senju. However, he had no idea why he was here, other than the foggy memory of waking up and deciding he really wanted to stop lazing around at his father's old bar and teach. He vaguely wondered if the degree he'd gotten all those years ago was really for teaching, but somehow his brain just wasn't working right that morning, and it swatted that stray thought away.
The woman in front of him, apparently well over fifty but looking to be around her early thirties, skimmed over his file briefly before eyeing his bewildered form. "Your mask doesn't mean you're sick, does it?"
"No, no, of course not!" Maybe he was sick. It wasn't like him to be flustered so easily. "Going around with a mask on is just my thing! Ahaha!" Tsunade wasn't buying it, he could tell. But no fear, because his father's legendary bullshitting skills just so happened to be one of the things he'd passed on before killing himself due to depression (his bar hadn't been very popular back then, what with the rumors going on, and so…).
"Tsunade-sama, I've found that masks just intimidate the kiddies a bit, and well, threats work much better with these things, you know?" Close-eyed smile, cue! And there you have it. She was relaxing now, worries gone. And look, now she was… pulling out a sake bottle from her robe… His smile nearly faltered for a second, but his perfect acting abilities slapped it before fixing it in place once more.
"Alright, you're hired."
He blinked. He could have sworn it was supposed to be harder than this.
"Now, welcome to Konoha Academy, oh wonderful new homeroom teacher of class 1-A. Here the homeroom classes are pretty closely-knit, so you're going to be expected to work your way in there. Homeroom and History, got it? Here's your schedule and a map of the school, and this folder holds everything else you need to know. Now, make your way over to the teacher's lounge, and there you'll see some of the other teachers you'll be working with." She burped loudly and swung her feet onto the desk, leaning back in her chair. "Go, dammit! Shoo!"
There were a few teachers in the teacher's lounge. That was strange, seeing as it was a Sunday. Maybe they were the over-achievers who had no life and wasted their weekends at work? They seemednormal enough.
"Hey, guys, it's another one!" said one as he spotted Kakashi walk in. "You're the third one today, man!"
And indeed, there on the couch was two other young men with the same bewildered expression he was sure he'd had on his face ever since "waking up" in Tsunade's office.
"KAKASHI, MY ETERNAL RIVAL! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?"
Oh god, it was Gai. The annoying man in spandex who had followed him around for his entire high school life. How could he forget Gai?
"I'm sorry, but who are you?" Close-eyed smile, cue!
…But then it faltered as the green-clad man merely leapt up to shake his hand excitedly like a squirrel on crack. Of course. There was no stopping Gai.
"KAKASHI, IT IS YOU! HOW COULD I NOT RECOGNIZE YOUR HIP, COOL ATTITUDE! BUT OF COURSE, THAT HIP BEHAVIOR IS NO MATCH FOR MY SPRINGTIME OF YOUTH!" He threwhisheadback and laughed. Threw it.
Kakashi looked imploringly at the guy smoking a cigarette near the soda machine (come on, a teacher smoking at school just had to be an alright guy, right?). The man just said, "Gym," and shrugged.
Oh Lord, Kakashi prayed silently, Please help your faithful subject.
This was just not normal.
First he'd gotten a job at the most prestigious school in all of Fire without even remembering ever getting a teaching degree, and now he was getting visions.
Of a pink-haired teenager.
What the fuck.
And then Jiraiya-sama's new installment in the Icha Icha series had come out, and the book had a picture of said pink-haired girl on the cover.
This was so not normal.
But then all of a sudden his brain clicked, and Kakashi smiled serenely, laid-back attitude back in working condition. No, nothing was strange at all. Everything was right in the world.
He loved his Sakura. Yes, pretty little Sakura with her soft pink hair, who loved Icha Icha Paridise more than anything in the world. The yearbook Tsunade had given him flipped open to her picture, and he grinned. Apparently her last name was Haruno. What a pretty name, but not as pretty as Sakura Hatake. Yes, Sakura Hatake… That had such a nice ring to it…
Rosa the supreme Mistress of Love swore to herself never to use that in-case-of-emergency love potion everagain, no matter howhot or cute the salesman was. It did not matterhow rippling his muscles were or how silky his voice was, because love potions just didnotwork, and ohgod she was never using them again. Never. Again.
Maybe she should practice just a little bit more before starting her game…
AUTHOR'S NOTE (PLEASE READ)
I am posting this Omake chapter to say that I am not dropping this story. I just haven't been having any inspiration for this story lately, and I feel like my writing skills are deteriorating… I have SO MANY IDEAS half-written and rotting away in my story folder…
But I managed to write this because of a sudden urge. So here ya go: the first Messing With Love omake chapter. Laugh, cry, curse, whatever, but I hope you will show your support by reviewing. You don't have to, but…
I love you all! Look out for the next chapter!