I own nothing.
"Baby, wake up," a voice cooed from next to my head. I blinked a few times, then opened my eyes to see my wife looking at me. "Hey love," I said groggily, smiling slightly, "What's wrong?" "You were just talking in your sleep again. You kept saying I love you and I want to be with you forever. You said you were sorry for ever doubting your feelings when you were told she felt the same and that you really did want to be with her. What were you dreaming about?" In the darkness of the room I blushed deeply. I wasn't dreaming of a she as Sora assumed. I was actually dreaming of a guy. A guy we both were close to and one I definitely knew shared my feelings of longing. "I can't remember what I was dreaming of Sor. It was probably of when we first met. I almost didn't go out with you when you told me how you felt. I was confused, but I'm happy I did." I kissed her on her temple and she snuggled closer to me. "I'm glad you did too. Otherwise I wouldn't be married to the love of my life right now." Satisfied with what I had said she closed her eyes and went back to sleep. I unfortunately couldn't do that. I had just lied to my wife about being in love, or at the very least lust, with my best friend. It had all started about a month ago.--- "Taichi, I have something I need to talk to you about something." Matt and I were walking through the park eating ice cream, something we did every Sunday. He always got mint chocolate chip and I always got rocky road. It was how we had managed to stay so close through out the years. All of the chosen had managed to stay close with our once a month get togethers, but Matt and I and Sora, Mimi and Hikari made it a point to spend time together on Saturdays afternoon. Sometimes Jyou or Takeru tagged along with Matt and I, but it was rare. "You know we can talk about anything Matt. Shoot." Matt was nervous. He was sucking on his ice cream cone, staring at the ground and doing more of a shuffle than a walk. It was making me nervous. "What do you think about gay people?" I let out the breath I hadn't realized I was holding. This was a conversation I had basically given up on having. We were twenty-four for god's sake! After him and Sora broke up he hadn't had a girlfriend and it had been eight years. We all already knew, but getting him out of the closet had been an issue. We just figured he's stay in it for the rest of his life at this point. "Gays? Well, I don't have a problem with it. If that's what you like, that's what you like and who am I to get in your way? Its everyone's right to be happy." Matt nodded and continued sucking on his ice cream cone. We walked in silence for a few minutes longer before he spoke again. "I think I might be gay." he blurted out, then blushed a deep shade of crimson. I kept on walking. "I know." He stopped and stared at me. "Wha-what?" he stammered. I grinned and stopped, looking at him. "I know. I've known for years. Come on, you haven't dated anyone since Sora and I've watched you check out guys on more than one occasion. I was just waiting for you to tell me. I didn't want to embarrass you or anything." "It would have been nice if you had given me a hint, Yagami! I've been afraid to tell you for the past three years! I thought you were going to hate me!" he yelled. I felt sort of bad for not laying hints, but not so guilty that I wasn't going to yell back. "Three years! I've known for twice that long. You'd have shot me if suggested it back then.
He glared at me, but dropped it and started walking again. He was still sucking on his ice cream cone though and that meant there was more.
"Are you worried about the other chosen? None of them will care. They're all comfortable with their sexuality and quite a few of them are even engaged! I mean, Takeru and Hikari, Miyako and Daisuke… Iori and Rin aren't because they're too young, but its only a matter of time. Mimi and Jyou are married already, and Ken and Koushiro, well, I hear Ken's with some girl and its pretty serious and Koushiro just won't care." Matt looked at me, confused. "You're still walking around nervous. Is that not what this was about?"
"No, I just have a lot on my mind. I thought this was going to be some big deal and now it turns out that it isn't… it's just weird."
I turned and cocked my eyebrow at him. "You're full of it, Ishida Yamato. I may not be the most perceptive person, but there are a few people I can always tell how are feeling, you, Hikari and Sora. Is there a guy or something?"
Yamato blushed, confirming my suspicion. "So who is he? Do I know him?"
He coughed. "You could say that."
"What does that mean? Do I just know them in passing or something?" This conversation was getting exhausting. It was like pulling teeth.
"No, not really."
"Well, why don't you just tell me who it is and then I'll know what it is you mean by all of that." Matt stopped and when I looked to see why he grabbed me and pulled me to him. When our lips met it was like a fire burst forth in my body. No kiss, even the most passionate one from Sora, had ever come close to what I was feeling with Matt and our kiss was fairly chaste.
When we finally broke it off I was out of breath. I took one look at the man in front of me and bolted.
Since then I hadn't seen or talked to Matt. He had tried calling and texting, but I had no idea what to tell him. The truth? A lie? Should I try and be with him in secret? What would that do to my family? My son, Jessie? Could I put a one year old through that? And now I was dreaming about him. With the way I talked in my sleep it's just a matter of time before she finds out. She could leave me for it. It could ruin our marriage, even if I have yet to do anything wrong. Then what? Where would I be? Would Matt and I even work out? There were so many questions and no answers. And all of this because I couldn't keep my damn mouth shut.
Today's secret: I worry that my candid sleeptalk will one day cost me my marriage.