Lying on my side in the back of the car, I fought to keep from crying. The blood was dribbling down my chin, but I couldn't wipe it away; my hands were tied tightly together, keeping me from being able to move. After all, I didn't want to. I wanted him to think I was unconscious. Maybe that way I could save myself some pain.
Jack's voice was still echoing in my head; Shelbie!
If it had happened, if by some immense miracle he heard my cry for help, he and I would have a helluvalot of explaining to do to Alex.
I wanted a drink.
God! Is that all I could think? That I wanted to drink something? I rolled my eyes even though they were closed. I brought myself back into the situation at hand. The car smelled like cigarettes and the man I thought I loved, the man I thought I loved me. He was driving quickly as usual, and I prayed that today would be the day he got caught.
No one stopped us. We were only on the highway for a few minutes.
I wanted to scream at him, to hit him. I wanted to cry, for someone I loved to come get me away from him and hold me. Maybe I could fight him myself.
Who was I kidding?
I was strong for a girl my age; I had to be, with the people I dealt with around. But there was no way I could handle him, not on my own. Unless…
No, don't even think that. You're not going to kill him, Shel. You're not. That's ridiculous. He has a life.
The devil in my head scoffed. Yeah, some life. Drinking, shooting heroin, and kidnapping the ex-girlfriends he raped and abused. Just do it. You may wind up saving somebody else's life. That's one less person spending their life in therapy because he fucked them over. Literally.
But what did it matter? Too many people in the world get hurt to let one go without feeling any pain. I sighed, hopeless in the back of the car. I was never hopeless. I could always come up with a plan.
What if he kidnapped me to kill me? What if he's going to actually try to kill me? I wouldn't put it past him, and at this point I don't really care. The only thing I've got to lose is the guys, and they'd get over it. I'm going to hell anyway.
I felt the car suddenly slow and turn. I cracked my eyes open slightly, and I could see trees out the window, but that was about it. A few rainclouds.
I had to get out of here. Maybe I could make a break for it when the car stopped. I was fast; maybe I could outrun him. But maybe not; for a drug addict he was in fantastic physical shape, so maybe that plan sucked too. God.
Clear your head. It's gonna be okay. Don't cry Shelbie, don't you cry.
The voice talking to me was bitter, merciless. It was my panic voice, my hide-your-emotions-at-all-costs voice. The one that didn't let me hurt, let me even feel.
He thought I was unconscious; maybe I should run. I'd have the element of surprise on my side anyway.
That's what I'll do. I'm not going to let him hurt me. And I'm sure as hell not going down without a fight.
The car turned again and bumped around as it pulled up a driveway. We were at a house that I'd never seen before, probably a drug house, but I didn't care. I was more concerned about whether I'd be able to outrun him.
The car stopped and he unlocked the doors. I sat up quickly and opened the door with one of my hands. I shot out, started running. I let myself cry then, tears streaming down my cheek alongside dry blood. I was moving fast, but the car had been moving faster a moment ago.
The car… dammit, I forgot he had the car. But I hadn't heard it turn on.
"Shelbie!" he roared.
After that, there was silence. And then, a single loud noise cut through. It was hidden under a crack of thunder, but to me, the other sound was louder. I knew that noise anywhere; it was the noise that haunted my dreams.
The man I thought I loved had just pulled out a gun and let a bullet fly.
I screamed in agony and collapsed onto the concrete. I could feel blood seeping out of me onto the pavement.
I heard the car start again and drive away. I cried then, too, the pain and the experience fueling the tears.
That was when the rain started. It began in drops and then fell harder, until the lightning and thunder were upon me as I lay dying in the middle of the street.
Let me know if you want me to continue! :)