Ninety things Japan cannot do

1. Japan cannot bring a camera to any world meetings.

2. This also applies to areas outside the conference room.

3. This includes the closets.

4. Especially the broom closet.

5. You know the one.

6. You cannot set up video cameras in other nation's homes.

7. This includes everyone.

8. Trying to hurt Korea with your Katana because he tried to touch your "breasts" is unacceptable.

9. Even though it is a pretty scary experience.

10. Talking to Hungary without an adult supervisor is not allowed.

11. France does not count.

12. Neither does a drunken England.

13. He'll agree to anything.

14. Do not give England alcohol.

15. Ever.

16. Do not tell Russia that Korea wants to be one with him.

17. Even though that sounds like good punishment for his groping of you.

18. Please be polite to China.

19. He is your father.

20. Sort of.

21. It is not okay to sell pictures of Italy in a maid outfit online to the other countries.

22. Even if he was okay with it.

23. Especially if he is okay with it.

24. Claiming that Canada is the child of England and France will only result in bodily harm of you and France from England.

25. Same with America.

26. (Even though it is kind of true.)

27. Asking Liechtenstein for pictures of Switzerland sleeping in his girly pajamas will just lead to Switzerland shooting at you.

28. It is not worth it if you get a picture of his embarrassed face.

29. Implying that Germany is in a relationship with Italy is not okay when you are speaking in a microphone.

30. Or next to other nations.

31. Even though everyone knows.

32. When at world meetings, do not agree with everything America says.

33. This will give France idea's about the nature of your relationship.

34. Not that he doesn't already think a lot about Greece's relationship with you.

35. He does not need to know that the thing with Greece is real.

36. And that you are tired from bottoming, not working.

37. Do not put cat ears on if Greece is on in a ten-mile radius.

38. He will know.

39. His cats will tell him.

40. And then your ass will regret it.

41. Do not tape America and England in the closet of the world conference building.

42. This applies to all closets.

43. ...And empty rooms.

44. Giving any items of girls clothing to Poland will make Lithuania stressed.

45. Among other feelings he will not admit.

46. Do not yell at France and England for not being 'moe'.

47. They do not understand.

48. You cannot add any pictures to your website.

49. Or video's.

50. Actually, anything uploaded to your website will be taken down, even though everyone will have downloaded it by then.

51. You can never encourage a drunken England to dress as a sexy waiter.

52. Or Britannia angel.

53. Or anything else involving little amounts of clothing.

54. If he does dress like this, do not give him to America.

55. Or France.

56. Anything but France.

57. When someone asks if there are any questions about their presentation, questions about their love lives do not count.

58. Even if Hungary really wants to know, too.

59. Do not distribute doujinshi of anyone.

60. Especially Canada.

70. He's still scared from seeing that one where Russia shows him a new way to use hockey sticks.

71. Stop eating all that salt!

72. You're going to get a heart attack.

73. And then, where will Greece be? You can barely keep up with his libido now.

74. Please stop endorsing the bunny girl outfits.

75. Cosplay is for conventions only.

76. Conventions only.

77. Thinking about how America technically has 50 children (states) can only lead to bad yaoi doujinshi.

78. Attempting to get Germany to confess to Italy won't work.

79. The other way around, however, works.

80. You cannot visit Hungary without an adult with you.

81. Do not pull on the Italy brother's curls.

82. They are not plants, even though they look like them.

83. This applies to everyone's curls.

84. Except maybe Greece's.

85. He needs to let you rest sometime.

86. If Italy hugs you, please don't demand him to 'take responsibility'.

87. He won't understand.

88. Even if he does, he won't do anything.

89. You two are guys, so no kids to 'take responsibility' of.

90. …Stop thinking about m-preg doujinshi. You know you were.

A/N: This was so much fun to write! XD Thank you's to the review'r who told me my spelling of katana was wrong.


Doujinshi: A fan-made (usually) manga about two characters in an anime/manga. Usually sexual.

Yaoi: Yummy guy smex/love.

Katana: The sword Japan carries around.