Oh, and it was a fine morning that June 1st, with me on the deck of my faithful little beast of burden, the loyal Nancy B. Alsop. The only scar marring a brilliant turquoise sky being that suspicious silver cloud, settled way down all heavy and melancholy on the horizon. But it was a long way off yet, and I mean to enjoy this sail.
"Higgins!" I shout, twirling about the deck, my bare feet patting on the gleaming wood like the noise little rat feet make in the bilge. "Oh, can't you smell that fine lady Boston from here?"
"Ah, yes, miss," dear Higgins says thoughtfully, gazing out over the port rail, "that fine lady Boston has an unfortunate stench of very dead fish…"
I laugh and scuttle onto the rail, the arch of my bare tan feet fitting onto the wood perfectly. I try to balance long enough to catch a glimpse of Boston, where I know awaits such dear, dear friends of mine. Alas, it seems not to be, as I whirl my arms in a quite ungainly fashion and tumble into the water below…
I swallow some water in surprise but oh no, no unsuspected dip in the Atlantic is enough to get Tonda-Lay-O, queen of the Ocean Sea. My head breaks the surface of that polluted water, and while I sputters a tiny bit, my head is calm and clear.
Calm and clear, that is, until I hear my crew's laughter….Grrrrr….
"Alright, you sods, laugh all you like," I howl, "but your sweet little faces won't be so smug once you fall into this water, no they won't. You'll get so cold, Davy you sod, that you'll face'll get all frozen and shrivel up and no lass'll want you then. Not even your Annie, she who swore undying love, because once she sees your ugly face she'll scream and run and try to hold it in but, oh no, she won't be able to."
How I'd like to say that shut em all up nice and quick, but oh no, they know better now than to believe all my furious rambling…even I know I don't make no sense right now.
I make my way to the hull of my little schooner with choppy, frozen movements, for though this water ain't as cold as I let on, it's still cold enough to make my elbows and knees and all ache in a dull sorta way.
But I can't hold a mad mood for too long, as everyone who's met me knows, and soon as my feet hit the deck I'm lunging at Davy (in a playful, friendly manner, mind you), the scoundrel, for I swore I heard him yell to me somethin' quite insulting the likes of which I couldn't quite make out, but I know to be rude from just his tone, the snot.
"Miss, please behave yourself," poor Higgins pleads, for now I've got Davy cornered against the rail and am laughing my head off about it.
"Don't worry, Higgins," I say, all cheerful and bright and sparkly and all, "Davy knows how to swim, I taught him while we were treasure-diving, didn't I, Davy?"
Davy nods. "That you did, Puss, that you did." He's grinning ear to ear, and looks to be excited about something I can't quite figure out.
All a the sudden some rogue has got me by the neck and dangling over the rail. Davy can't seem to hold his laughter no more as I fall down towards the water once more…
Grrrr………..dang that Davy!