A/N: Because in my 50-sentenced thing, this was Tyki's birthday present~~

Written completely on my new Mac~~~


EDITED, 'cause I know nothing about language, and RavenLadySerena was kind enough to point out some of my dire mistakes. :3

Yuu Kanda hated to shop with a fiery passion.

Despite general consensus, he didn't hate anything within a ten mile radius of his being (girls, on the other hand, was a different story). He's generally indifferent to everything, as long as they didn't affect him directly. Once they do, however, they can only be sorted into three separate categories: "Alright", "Obligated to Not-Dislike", and "Fuck to Hell and Back and Kill and Eat Whatever Offspring the Thing In Question Might Produce In His/Her/Its Unfortunate Lifetime". The only thing to have ever broken the 3-groups rule was one Tyki Mikk, but that was a different story altogether (the jerk). But other than the Portuguese man in question, his way of categorizing totally worked. He'd never tell that damn idiot, but Lavi belonged in the "Alright" category. And so did Lenalee, when she wasn't so hung up on him every single second of every single day. Komui was alright too. The Moyashi belonged in the "Obligated to Not-Dislike" group, since he was a friend of Lavi's and all, and the Rabbit expressly asked him to not give Allen a hard time (one of the few times he had ever seen the redhead look so serious). The "Fuck to Hell" group so far contained, well, many people that he wasn't going to name. It suffices to say that there were more than a couple.

But those are all people. Things fell into the categories as well. Soba was in "Alright". As much as he disliked sour things, Tyki loved them (why is completely beyond him), so those were in the "Obligated to Not-Dislike" group. The "Fuck to Hell" group was specially reserved for sweet stuff.

And shopping, of course.

Of course, there was a reason. Kanda wasn't one to hate things on principle (another 'Contrary to Popular Belief' moment). He hated sweets because A, they tasted horrible, and B, saying he hates them certainly does irritate that bubble-brain-jock-cousin of Tyki's. He hated shopping because, well... Because of this.

When a person goes to the mall, Yuu Kanda would not be the person they would expect to see. If the person in question is not familiar with Yuu Kanda, then he would appear as a model or something (albeit with a deep scowl). If the person in question is familiar with Yuu Kanda, then well, it's apparent why he or she would not expect to see him.

Really now. It's Yuu Kanda, for crying out loud.

But if said person (familiar or not) did go to the mall in the particular week preceding the particular birthday of a particular Tyki Mikk, then said person would see - smoking pot or no - Yuu Kanda standing in one particular corridor, in one particular stance, with one particular expression on his face, in front of one particular window. Of course, different people would treat the situation differently than others. Most just don't know how differently. (Un)Luckily, Kanda had the luck of finding out what most of those people influencing his life right then and there would do if said most people were in that particular situation.

Restraint cannot be lacking within Yuu Kanda, for even with the big R on full force, he still had half the mind to just grab Mugen and proceed to kill whatever deity made his life so difficult, screw gravity to hell and back.


To an innocent bystander, it would appear that Lavi was the bane of Kanda's existence. To the well-trained eye, Lavi was Kanda's best friend. That's why Lavi felt entitled to keep that title of Yuu's Best Friend and do what best friends do when their best friend's in trouble.

...Much to the Japanese man's ire.

It had all started with that one shout out...


Kanda froze. Dammit, why didn't he see this coming? It was a Monday, which meant that he got out of college early. Unfortunately, it seemed like one redhead did, also (though he doesn't know why he's surprised, seeing Lavi had made sure to be in all the same classes as him). But, of course, planning wasn't his forte in anyway. If anything, it was the stupid rabbit's, which meant stealthily creeping up behind the surprisingly-off-guard Kanda and clasping him around the neck (and coincidentally making his eardrums bleed with one prolonged shout) to prevent escape (because Lavi speaks from experience when he says that Yuu was fast).

"Dammit, GET OFF ME!"

With a laugh, Lavi hopped off the Japanese man's back (muscled yet lithe, the lucky bastard), but kept his arms in a strong circle around that long pale neck that would appear in any vampire's wet dreams.

...Not that he was one. Stupid Mondays. Though he got out of college early, Mondays seem to draw out the pathetic poet in Lavi, and the dire need to describe his best friend's anatomy with disturbing metaphors quite specifically.

"Quit staring!" Kanda hissed. With a blink to clear his slightly disturbing thoughts, Lavi was all grins and winks once more.

"Just thought I'd take a good look at an endangered species while it lasts," Lavi joked. Seeing the confused expression on Kanda's face (who obviously failed to get the joke), he continued. "Y'know, I really do believe that this is the last of its kind! A shopping Yuu-chan! Where's a Flip camera and YouTube when you need it?"

After a moment's pause (as long as Kanda took to understand Lavi's mockery), the Japanese man scowled, and Lavi swore his right hand twitched towards his waistband, where he would normally keep Mugen. (For Kanda, Un)Fortunately, malls and other respectable places didn't allow potentially lethal Japanese men to bring potentially lethal weapons into their bowels.

Hah. Bowels. That's one funny word.

"Watch it, rabbit," Kanda growled, shooting his death glare at his friend. Backing up with a fearful grin on his face, Lavi resolved to ask Tyki how the hell does he deal with it; everyday, nonetheless.

"I do apologize Yuu," he chuckled nervously. "That was my death wish speaking. But I do wonder though, about your presence here..."

Kanda didn't answer, instead just shot the redhead a strange look. "Why the hell are you talking so weird?"

"It's the Shakespeare plays I'm analyzing in class," Lavi sighed forlornly. "Has me speaking like one idiotic Romeo. The fool committed suicide for love, of all things."

"...Did you just say foo-"

"Yes, Yuu, I just said fool. Stop trying to change the subject, and I'll revert to my usual way of talking. Ready?"

Lavi's green eye met Kanda's blue ones in a strange understanding, and the redhead took a deep breath, and plastered a huge grin on his face. "Whatcha doin' here, Yuu~?"

"Idiot Rabbit..." the Japanese man muttered, but the insult lacked the fire behind it. Lavi was about to ask again, before Kanda's eyes shifted uncertainly to his right to look back into the window. Lavi followed his gaze, and saw...


"I know. Don't even say it."

"But... Yuu..."


"But Yuu!"


"...You'd look hot in that."


"Uh, Yuu...?"

"You better run for your life, Lavi Bookman, before I- Damn, he's fast."


To Lenalee, shopping was her guilty pleasure. She loved strolling down the mall corridors, just window shopping, but every once in a while there comes a certain sparkling display that just made it so that she had to buy it. Of course, she knew that her doting brother would never object to giving her more money to let her buy whatever she wants (in fact, Komui would probably stuff her wallet full of hundred dollar bills), but she could never stop feeling guilty at taking money from her brother. Or anyone, for that matter, even if they were to offer. Taking money from people just wasn't something she did.

Neither did Kanda, now she is reminded (though his reason is quite different from hers; something about owing people favors never ends well) by her Japanese friend's form standing in front of a window. There was no doubt about it. The wide shoulders, the muscular arms, the frame fit for a world-class acrobat, and the most gorgeous and silky hair she has ever seen (unfair). The one proof absent from her collection though, was the haughty and proud way Kanda always held his head. Now though, her friend's head was angled down, and his shoulders slightly slumped, making him look just the wee bit indecisive.


Kanda jumped. Now Lenalee knew that something was wrong. Yuu Kanda is never surprised, unless the matters regard one Tyki Mikk.

"Kanda? What's wrong?"

"No-nothing," Kanda stammered.

Now, there's just something intensely wrong with that. "Kanda" and "stammered" just didn't belong in the same sentence, unless the latter was used to describe the action of someone on the receiving side of the famed Kanda-Death Glare.

"There's something wrong," Lenalee said, looking at him sternly, but worriedly. "Tell me?"

Now, Kanda actually contemplated her offer. The world might end, but right now, Lenalee was just happy he was opening up a bit to his friends. Must have something to do with the love thing everyone talks about (too bad she has yet to find her own destiny; another thing to be jealous of Kanda of).

"Well..." he started after a long minute. Lenalee leaned forward in interest. "See, I..."

Kanda's eyes once again gave him away as he turned to look at the window. Lenalee followed his gaze, and felt her jaws drop promptly in response.



"Are you gonna- ?"

"I- I don't know!"

"Oh my God! For Tyki- ?"

"I- I- !"

"That's so sweet, Kanda! Go ahead! I'm sure he'll love it!"

"Bu-but... I..."

"And besides, you'll look so good in it!"

"...You're lucky I've known you since the first grade, or you would've been a bloody splatter on the ground outside right now, Lenalee..."


If it was one trait Allen Walker shared with Yuu Kanda, it was their mutual dislike for shopping. For Allen, it always brought back the old days where he'd scour every single hallway and every single vendor for a job, to pay off one of those large sum of numbers with far too many zeros Cross Marian called his debt. That's why he avoided shopping as much as possible, but since it was Miranda's birthday, he really needed to get something for her. Inspiration just didn't come from shopping on Amazon, so as a last bet, he figured The Mall would do.

But he never expected him to be here, of all people.

Allen's first reaction had been to just turn around and walk away, pretending to have never seen him, and drive away, back to college, in his beaten up yellow Ford. But then, of course, he saw his arch rival's expression, and knew he had to find out exactly what's made Kanda make that face (to send him or her or it a box of champagne or a bouquet of flowers later).


Kanda spun around, eyes wide with disbelief, until he saw who it was. Then his expression promptly turned into a feral scowl. "Bean Sprout? What the hell are you doing here?"

"I could ask the same of you," he replied with a frown, crossing his arms in front of his chest. "And it's Allen. How many times do I have to tell you that?"

As much as he'd love to attach a "BaKanda" to the end of that question, Allen didn't want to be hypocritical.

"Does it look like I care?" With a glare, Kanda spun around and promptly began to walk off. But Allen couldn't let that happen. He had a (self-appointed) mission to complete.

"Wait, Kanda!"

"What do you want?"

"What were you looking a-"

Promptly, Allen stopped, staring in shock up at the store window Kanda was glaring into. Kanda promptly flush a dark red, not that Allen would know. He was too busy gawking at the window display.

"I swear, Bean Sprout, if you tell anyone..."

"God dammit... You and Mikk... What kind of sex life do you two have?"


Unlike his idiot disciple, Cross Marian quite liked shopping at the mall. I mean, who wouldn't like to browse stores where gorgeous women dressed in skimpy clothing gazed lustily and flirted with you?

Speaking of gorgeous women, there was one standing outside that sto- Oh wait, that's just Kanda.

...Wait a minute. Kanda?

"Hey, you!" Cross called gruffly, uncertain of something, for once. "Hey!"

The redhead watched as Kanda turned uncertainly, saw him, and eyes widening. Then, without preamble, turned tail to run.

Cross was waaay ahead of him.

"Now wait right there, young man," Cross said, tightening his grip on the Japanese man's upper arm until he winced. Then he loosened his hold, satisfied. "You're shopping?"


"Then what are you doing here at the mall?"

"I'm just... browsing...!"

"Yuh huh. Believable story. And don't you know that nowadays, browsing is still shopping?"

"Shut up, and let me go!" Kanda yelped, wrenching his arm out of his grip, massaging the aching appendage while simultaneously glaring at Cross. "Whatever! I'm leaving!"

"Not so fast," Cross called, and unfortunately, Kanda had to obey (he was his professor and all, and as far as Kanda knew, the man would have no qualms about giving him an F just because he felt like it). "So you are shopping. The question is, whatever could you be looking at...?"

Then, Cross turned before Kanda could stop him. His smirk promptly turned amused.

"Oooooh... What might this be...?"

"It's- it's not what you think!"

"It's exactly what I think. Need I voice it out loud? It's for that chemistry professor, Mikk, no?"

"How did you-?"

"Hey. I'm updated on the school grapevine. So...?"

"So... what?"

"Are you going to buy it?"

"Wha- I- I don't-!"

"C'mon. He's gonna love it. I already do..."


"Hey. Nothing wrong with a skimpy outfit, especially for your boyfriend, now is there, Yuu Kanda?"

"Sh- shut up!"

Friday - 4:25 p.m.

Finally, it was the dreaded day. If Kanda didn't buy It now, he wouldn't be able to make it for tonight as Tyki's birthday present. Dammit. He needed to decide quickly.

Taking a deep breath, Kanda stepped forward, and opened the door.

"Excuse me... I'd like to buy that outfit in the display... And a... One of those... Boxes..."

Friday - 8: 40 p.m.

Tyki Mikk sighed. He had not had a good day, despite it being his birthday and all. Wait, day? Scratch that. he hasn't had a good week. Ever since that fight with Kanda, he had been pretty... touchy about everything that goes wrong in his life.

And it was supposed to be his birthday, god dammit.

Monday had started well enough. He didn't wake up in a particularly bad mood. Neither did Kanda. So why did he get mad again? Oh yeah. The stupid Earl had came to pester him at work along with Cyril, and irked the hell out of him. When he got home, expecting to see Kanda there, waiting for him, an empty house greeted him. Of course, it was strange, seeing the Japanese man wasn't exactly sociable, and didn't really stay out at night (never, really), unless one redheaded rabbit pulled him into having a couple of drinks with him and his friends. But Lavi would always call and tell him. He knew how insecure Tyki was.

But it turned out Kanda wasn't out with Lavi, and when the long-haired man got home, Tyki had simply asked him where he has been. But what did Kanda do then? He fucking blushed and ran away.

If that wasn't a reason to get suspicious, he didn't know what was.

Everything went downhill from there. Kanda started avoiding him, leaving the house way before him (which was saying something, since the principal required all educators to be at school at 7:00 precisely), not attending his classes, and coming home way after Tyki's fallen asleep. Damn. If Tyki wasn't so fucking tired all the time, maybe he would've fucking stayed up fucking long enough to fucking find out exactly what Kanda was up to.

...And stop swearing so profusely.

Well, whatever. He was home now, and all he could think about is how frustrated he was, and how soft his side of the bed was. If he was going to find out what Kanda was up to, he's better off doing it on a not-so-tired brain.

In fact, he was so tired he almost didn't see the piece of paper taped on the bedroom door. Wondering exactly when and how that got there, Tyki pulled it down and flipped it open.


...Happy Birthday.


Even two simultaneous blinks failed to elucidate the situation. So, ever the height of genius, Tyki decided to enter the room after two and a half minutes of staring blankly at the makeshift card.

The scene after the door wouldn't have been able to be clarified even with three blinks.

Friday - 8:45 p.m.

"Frankly, I'm kind of worried."

"D'aaaw, is Bean Sprout-chan worried for Yuu~?"

"No! I'm worried for the store owner! Did you see his glare...?"

"I'm sure the store's safe and sound, Allen-kun."

"Yeah. Yuu-chan, on the other hand..."

"You think that's his birthday present for Mikk?"

"Uh, no."

"What? Then why was he staring at it like that?"

"That's more of the packaging, if you catch my drift."


"So... Kanda's going to wear that and give himself to Tyki..."

"Wow. Komui's so gonna murder me if he ever hears you talking that like, Lenalee."

"Kanda's gonna...?"

"Yes. You've gotta admit though..."

"Yeah... Kanda'd look..."

"...Hot in that..."

Friday - 8:58 p.m.

He was a cat. He was a fucking cat.

A fucking adorable cat, sure, but a cat.

Damn his soft spot for furry animals. And leather. And one Yuu Kanda.


Tyki walked forward towards the beautiful creature as if in a trance, golden eyes wide and fixated on his lover. When he reached the bedside, he reached a tentative hand forward, afraid that once he touches the wonderful mirage in front of him, he was going to disappear.

Thankfully, the pale porcelain cheek of one Yuu Kanda was perfectly substantial.

So was the pale pink tongue that darted out from those perfect parted lips to lick him under his eye. Then his cheek. Then his mouth.

Shock? What shock?

Tyki didn't know how long he stood there, bent over, staring at Kanda, comatose. But apparently, it was long enough that Kitty Kanda got impatient, and reached up with his fuzzy black glove-covered hands to pull Tyki down in a mind-blowing kiss.

That woke Tyki up good. A kiss like that was enough to wipe away all traces of weariness from his being and wake up the libido gathered from a week of no sex. Fuck, Kanda was delicious. With Noah abandon, the Portuguese man took over the kiss, nibbling and sucking and pulling and digging, until Kanda was desperately pushing at his shoulders from below, trying to break away long enough to get a much-needed breath. But Tyki was having none of that. With strength anew, he grasped Kanda's wrists tightly and pulled them on top of his head, his legs conveniently draped across Kanda's to prevent him from kicking. More and more Tyki attempted to kiss Kanda into oblivion, relieving all the stress and frustration gathered from the past week onto his writhing lover beneath him. Finally, Tyki pulled back, releasing Kanda's hands and sat up to straddle the Japanese man's slim waist that was further pronounced by the skin-tight leather tube top, satisfied at the breathless state his lover was in.

Ah, how beautiful Kanda looked, arms by his head, silky oblivion hair spread across the white sheets so perfectly like that, the leather collar on his neck...

Tyki leaned down for another kiss, but his lips were suddenly obstructed by a hardish subject.

A box. A wooden box.

With a strange look at the still-panting Kanda who had presented the box to him, Tyki flipped the top open.

...And grinned a devious, beautiful grin.

"Oh, kitty..." the Portuguese man simpered, with such an ambiguous message as this, what is it that you want me to do with you?"

Kanda almost scowled, before he reminded himself that Yes, he was in the wrong, and Yes, this was Tyki's birthday. He has a lot more restraint than most give him credit for.

"Huh, kitty? Answer me..."

Slowly, Kanda sat up, avoiding Tyki's gaze with a furious blush. His eyes fell on that infuriatingly pink slip of paper inside the box, laying on top of so many... objects.

The pink slip of paper that simply read: Punish Me.

Three guesses at everything that was in the box. Kanda wasn't about to go telling his lover that the wooden thing had three layers.

"Alright, guess you can't talk," Tyki concluded. The Japanese man rolled his eyes, glad that he got the message. "So... How about this? What do you want me to do with this?"

Kanda gulped at the sight of the metal ring in his lover's hands, being toyed with between lithe fingers. Of course, he had bought the whole thing with this intention in mind (Tyki loved BDSM, unfortunately), but when it was actually happening... He could feel his heart skip a couple of beats.

With a smirk, Tyki pulled Kanda's glove-covered hand in front of him, and placed the ring there. He then sat back further on those outstretched legs to watch Kanda with a burning passion in his eyes. He watched as the Japanese man's hand (that shook ever so subtly) reached down to the bottom of the leather skirt and slowly pulled it up, revealing his half-hard erection (that got just a bit stiffer under the scrutiny of Tyki's gaze). The ring was placed on top of his manhood, and slowly slid down along the shaft, Kanda cringing every single inch it falls. By the time the silver sat snug at the base, he was as hard as he has ever been.

"Good kitty..." Tyki whispered, leaning forward again. He brushed his fingertips along the underside of Kanda's cock, eliciting a shiver from the slighter man. Tyki's tongue darted out, lapping at its head, darting into the silt, the Portuguese man watching through half-lidded eyes as Kanda arched back, mouth opened in a silent scream. Sensually, he petted the slightly salty flesh with his tongue and lips and teeth, lapping at the precum that leaked out. Tyki sat back and licked his lips, watching Kanda shiver in pleasure. "Yum..."

Tyki pulled his tie off, offering it to his lover once Kanda opened his eyes. Kanda regarded the fabric with suspicion, but took it in both hands anyways, looking back up at the Portuguese man, eyes silently imploring what he was supposed to do with it.

"Cover your eyes, kitten," Tyki replied, and watched, fascinated, as the Japanese man blindfolded himself; the red of the fabric doing wonders against the pale skin, dark hair, and black cat ears. With a quiet chuckle, Tyki offered him the box. "Now reach in here and take out the first thing you touch."

As luck would have it, Kanda's fingers closed around a ball gag. With shaking hands, the Japanese man pulled the gag up to his mouth, and clamped the red ball between his lips. He reached back to tighten the leather strap, but Tyki's hands were suddenly there, pulling the straps tight against each other, sending the too-large rubber ball into his mouth too deep for comfort. Kanda coughed a bit, for good measure, but Tyki didn't loosen the strap.

"You look so nice like that, kitten," the Portuguese man purred, sending his hand into the second layer of the wooden box to see what he would come up with. An anal plug. Perfect. Tyki got off the bed and reached for a chair, placing the conveniently adhesive bottom of the plug in the center of the seat. With a satisfied smile, he walked back to the bed and picked Kanda up in his arms, bridal style. Kanda automatically buried his face in the hollow of Tyki's neck, nuzzling, not unlike the animal he was dressed up to be. Tyki almost regretted the 'fun' he had planned out for the rest of the night. Then he remembered the week of torture Kanda had put him through, and the raging fire in his groin from his natural sadistic streak. "Now kitten, I just want you to sit here while I get... ready, alright?"

Without warning, he dropped his lover onto the seat, the plug disappearing instantly into Kanda. A muffled scream sounded from behind the gag as Kanda flailed, instinctively trying to get away from the source of the pain, but Tyki had latched his feet to the legs of the chair and his hands to the back via the convenient handcuffs in the box's top layer. The Japanese man struggled for a moment, pulling at the handcuffs and arching off his seat, until finally, he settled back with a grimace, shifting every now and then to get in a better position (not that there was one). Satisfied, Tyki began to walk towards the door.

"I'll be right back, kitten," he called over his shoulder, opening the door, then closing it again, to make it seem like he went out. Then, stealthily he crept to the thankfully squeak-less bed, settling down to watch his lover squirm in the seat, all his annoyance from just earlier that evening gone with a simple opening of a door.

Oh how he loved his birthdays.

Friday - 9:13 p.m.

For Kanda, this was torture. He had always been the type to be in control all the time; always knowing what was happening to who and what when. And Tyki used that to his advantage by reducing him to this vulnerable state of both body and mind.

Speaking of his lover, Tyki was sure gone for a long time.

Of course, this could just be another one of those mind games the Portuguese man loved to play, but Kanda wasn't one to bother figuring out exactly what this meant for him. As sooner Tyki was back, the better, and if Tyki was still in this room...

Well, if there was one thing Yuu Kanda was good at, it was getting his lover aroused.

Friday - 9:15 p.m.

Kanda moaned through the gag loudly, shifting in the seat, arching his back, and pushing down again, attempting to fuck himself on the toy.

Tyki just watched on silently with a lusty gaze.

Kanda rubbed his cheek against his shoulder, attempting to get the blindfold off, while his waterfall of hair fell down and caressed his back with their tips.

Tyki shifted silently and licked his lips.

Kanda's breathing got just that much more erratic as his hair fell down to covet his hard, aching cock.

Tyki slowly got up on legs that stretched for miles.

Kanda arched his back, and was about to drop down onto the toy one last time with his breath hitched tight in his throat.

Tyki caught him before he could, pulling the gag off in one swift motion, and shoved his tongue down Kanda's throat.

Or at least, that's what it felt like.

The Portuguese man continued to pillage his mouth as he straddled Kanda's waist again, pulling his left knee up to the chair, grinding his hips against his lover's trapped erection, then swallowing Kanda's moan of pleasure. He pulled away from Kanda's mouth, just enough to breathe the air between them, then back in once more. His hands flitted down Kanda's sides, pulling down the zipper on the side of the top, grinning against the Japanese man's lips as his lover shivered against the feel of the moving zipper. The leather slid down easily enough, falling down to bunch at Kanda's waist, where Tyki didn't pull the zipper down all the way. Fingertips traced Kanda's figure, from his long, pale neck to the hard-won muscles of his stomach, circling teasingly around two dark nipples. Then Tyki's mouth left his lover's to trail down, planting butterfly kisses along the quivering skin until his lips could clamp around one nipple, pulling and sucking and biting, his fingers mercilessly twisting its twin. The Portuguese man could feel Kanda's hair sliding across his cheeks, then off, then back again as Kanda threw his head around, trapped in the threshold between pain and pleasure. Sometime during the ministrations, Kanda had fallen back down onto the plug, and squirmed even more because of that. All together, Tyki's kisses and pinches and the toy's touches all became too much for Kanda, and he could feel himself spasm in a dry orgasm, the finale lacking the comfort it would've brought without that fucking cock ring.

Then Tyki was gone, and Kanda could only blink in shock at the sudden loss.

He could feel his Portuguese lover's hands at his hips, guiding them up and off the plug with a wet sound, then the telltale sound of the adhesive peeling off as Tyki took the toy off the seat. Kanda sighed in relief as he heard and felt the cuffs around his hands and feet being unlocked by the key, and rubbed his wrists once they were freed. Next and last thing to come off was the blindfold (not the cock ring, unfortunately) as Kanda felt Tyki carrying him back to the bed, lips mouthing warmly at his temple. Kanda couldn't help but sigh in contentment, leaning into his lover's arms, breathing and kissing across Tyki's neck. He loved how the Portuguese man tasted; like the finest blend of mocha and black coffee; the perfect comfort food he needed.

"You taste nice..." he heard himself say, then instantly jerked away from the hypnotizing pheromones of Tyki Mikk with a scowl and a blush, and heard said Tyki Mikk chuckle lightly above him as he sat Kanda down on his lap on the bed.

"You don't taste all that bad yourself, gato," Tyki replied smoothly.

Before he could stop himself, Kanda asked, "What do I taste like?" Then he proceeded to smack himself in the forehead. Tyki just laughed.

"Like Spring and the river," he replied. Then, as an afterthought (and a response to Kanda's eye roll), he added, "And maple."

"Maple what?"

Tyki looked amused. "Why does it matter?"

"'Cause maple syrup tastes different from sugar," the Japanese man explained. Upon realizing how stupid and out of character he sounded, he just groaned and buried his face in Tyki's chest. "I need to shut the fuck up..."

"Not before you tell me, gata," Tyki laughed. Kanda peaked up at him, curious.

"Tell you what?"

"Tell me what I taste like."

A coy smirk broke across Kanda's face as he leaned upwards to talk against Tyki's mouth. "Hm... I forgot... Care to remind me?"

"Avec plaisir."

"Since when were you French?"

"Com prazer," Tyki amended. Kanda flashed him a rare and momentary grin.

"Das ist besser..."

Tyki quirked an eyebrow. "Since when did you speak German?"

"Since I found out how great you are in bed when you're jealous," Kanda replied easily, kissing his lips once, twice. "And I started taking that Professor Wisely guy's class."

"Nice guy, aren't you?"

"Me? Nice? You should know better than that. Now shut up and kiss me."

Tyki gladly complied, and proceeded to do much more once he had Kanda pinned on the sheets.

There was, after all, a third layer in that wooden box.

Saturday - 0:34 a.m.

Tyki watched his lover's bare chest rise and fall beside him, wiping a droplet of perspiration from Kanda's skin. After three long hours, even himself was spent.

"Te amo..." he whispered, just before he closed his eyes with a smile gracing his lips. "Meu gato..."

A/N: Ouch... I know...

Stupid ending...

Gato = Cat, kitten, etc.

Avec plaisir = With pleasure in French = Com prazer in Portuguese

Das ist mehr, wie es = That's more like it

Te amo = I love you

Meu gato = my kitten


My fail attempt at both humor and sex...

So... review~~~? Pretty please~~~?