Comforting the Broken
Summary: Lithuania is living with Alfred but finds to his horror that he still misses Ivan in some ways. LithuaniaXAmerica - Rated M for Toris being a pitiful confused mess and Alfred being a somewhat slutty hero. Human names used. :P
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It'd been about a month and a half since Lithuania had come to live with America under the pretense of being his house keeper. Sure Alfred loved the fact that he didn't have to do anything around the house (not that the did much to begin with...), but there was another much more important reason. Toris was hurt and America wanted to help him heal.
Lithuania was more than happy to work at America's house and earn some money to help his people. Being able to sleep in his own room alone without having to worry about any drunken maniac waking him in the middle of the night for unwholesome reasons was an added perk. Even so, he couldn't be at peace. Nearly every night for the first week he woke up screaming, shaking all over and covered in sweat from various nightmares. Ever the hero, Alfred had come to comfort him every time. No matter how Toris apologized and asked to move to a room on the other side of the house to sleep so he wouldn't bother him, Alfred just smiled kindly and shook his head.
He would climb into the other mans bed and hold him gently, shushing his crying and rocking back and forth to calm the shaking, whispering that everything would be alright, that Toris was safe now. Toris didn't know how to repay him except to make certain that he was the best house keeper he could possibly be. Over the next few weeks the nightmares came less and less and eventually they seemed to all but disappear.
Toris finished making the bed in his own room and bent down to smooth the blanket. He bent further over the bed reaching to smooth out the other side. His crotch brushed and then pushed at the bed as he did so and he let out a gasp. He blushed and sighed as he looked down taking a step back. He looked across the room into the mirror that stood in the corner as he ran a hand through his hair and rubbed at the back of his neck. It'd now been over a month an a half since he'd been touched, even by himself except during mundane activities.
Toris sighed again trying to ignore nagging desire, hoping it would go away if it was simply left alone. The brunette was weary to do anything of a sexual nature. When he'd lived with Ivan he wasn't left alone enough to feel the need to do anything himself...even if he had been he would have been too afraid of Ivan finding out somehow and using it against him. Lithuania swallowed hard as he thought of the man he had lived with for so long. He tried to push the thoughts away but they only flooded back with more force.
All the times Ivan had taken him... sometimes gently but usually not so... Toris felt his entire body heat up, his face turning red as the memories washed over him. Tears began to fill his eyes as he leaned back against the wall and whimpered, his will to stand on his own seemed to leave him. He felt weak and helpless, betrayed by his own thoughts as a mix of confusing emotions rushed through him, only heightening his original desire. The hot tears were pouring down his face as he cried softly and sunk down lower against the wall. How could he think of that man in such a way? That monster...the one who had hurt him and those he cared about so much... And yet, Toris knew he still cared for the Russian very deeply in some odd and twisted way. The realization made his mind and body scream with conflicting wants and he continued to cry harder now, holding his head in is hands and rocking back and forth slightly, desperately hoping that it would all just go away.
"Toris...?" Alfred spoke softly from the doorway. When he didn't get a response he stepped into the room and approached the sobbing man. He reached out, touching Toris on the arm gently. Toris jerked back defensively covering his face and letting out a pitiful whimper before he realized who it was.
"A-Alfred? I..." Lithuania started quietly, not trusting his voice above a whisper as he lowered his arms and pushed against the wall trying to stand back up strait. He hiccuped and let out a shaky breath trying to calm his crying as he whiped his face with his arm before glancing back up at the American. The mans emerald eyes were distant though and Alfred knew he was consumed by his own thoughts. Alfred leaned down slightly wraping his arms carefully around the lightly trembling man.
"It's okay...It's okay buddy...every thing's gonna be alright..." Alfred murmured, holding Toris' body against his own as the man weakly returned the embrace. Toris' heart raced as he felt Alfred press against him and he felt that it was too much to be so close to someone else, but he couldn't pull away. His mind was muddled now, his physical desires defeating half the thoughts that his mind was trying to bring to his attention. The brunette tilted his head up and sighed as the burden of his thoughts was completely lifted, pure relief spreading though his body, his lips pressing softly against the taller mans.
Alfred tensed and felt his heart flutter when Toris kissed him. He tried to search his mind for the heroic thing to do...the right thing... His mind was confused and chaotic though, giving him a dozen contradicting answers, and after a moment he gave up, parting his lips as the Lithuanian's tongue gently slipped into his mouth, mercifully blotting out any arguments his conscious might have had.
Toris pulled away suddenly, before either man was fully satisfied with the action. Alfred stared at the smaller man, wanting to understand, to see what Toris wanted, where the brunette wanted this to go. Toris's half lidded eyes were cast downward though, avoiding the blonds stare.
"Toris..." Alfred whispered, an anxious expression prevalent in his features. Toris glazed up at him finally and a chill when through his body. What have I done? He thought as fear ran through him like electricity, erasing his lust in one fell swoop. I'll have ruined everything. He swallowed hard hoping Alfred wasn't too terribly offended and would let him continue to work for him.
"I...I'm sorry." Was all he could manage to force out before pressing his face into the American's chest and beginning to cry softly again. Alfred held the man tighter and leaning his cheek against the top of the brunettes head as he rubbed his back comfortingly.
"It's okay..." Alfred said finally, unsure of how else to respond. "Don't worry about it." Toris relaxed as he exhaled slowly turning his head, leaning fully against America as he was exhausted completely by the emotional stress and sexual frustration. Alfred smiled and closed his eyes, supporting the mans weight easily as he held him.
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AN: Yay! Tori isn't being tortured for once! ...at least not directly. XD Ah, this will probably only have one or two more chapters, but we'll see. C:
And I am working on my other stuff! I promise!