Edward Cullen.

What can I tell you about Edward Cullen? Nothing nice I can tell you that much. He is Forks own god. Well god amongst women that is. Every single girl in the school wants to jump on his dick. He walks with swagger that makes all the girls drool.

I hate that mother fucker!

He has bronze hair that is a beautiful mess. Sex is just oozing out of his pores. He has these emerald orbs that have specks of gold through out them. He is tall and muscular.

Then there is Tanya, she is the one who is trying to get him to settle down.

Good luck honey!

As I said before all the girls want to be with him. They all want to be the one to tie down the infamous Edward Cullen.

I don't understand why they even try. He is never going to change. Once a player always a player.

His dad is Carlisle. He is the doctor to the little town we call Forks. I don't understand how such a good man like him can raise a Neanderthal like Edward.

When he speaks it makes me grind my teeth but all the girls love his voice.

I hate it.

Well what can I say? I could use constructive criticism.

Lets try why don't we-

Edward Cullen has.......

Okay screw this its too difficult. Well I guess he is smart. Which is suprising. Edward and I have this little competition. We both want to be valedictorian. So we are competing.

I will win. I guess that is the only nice thing I can say about Edward Cullen.

Sometimes I imagine what it would be like to live in a world without him.

Would it be better? Worse? Who the hell knows. I like to believe it would be better, but like I said before there is a chance it would be worse.

I mean I would have no competition for valedictorian. I know I'm smart but I don't just want it to be handed off. It has to be completely fair.

He makes it fair.

But then it could be better because I would never have to look into his stupid green eyes again!

Ha, that would be great. My dad is the chief of police and he has had quite a few run ins with the town fuck-ups.

They consist of Edward, Jasper, Emmett, James, and Jacob.

I hate them all. They need to die.

Then there are my schools equivalent to the plastics. Alice, Rosalie, Tanya, and Jesssica.

I was one of them once back in sixth grade but I wore something "ugly" and I was out. That's how I meat Angela, my best friend.

Ah, I love her. She is my only friend. Pathetic I know.

But I'd rather have one really good friend than a lot of really fake friends. I'm considered a freak at my school but I don't give a rats ass.

Hah, sometimes I lover me.

Back to the topic of Edward Cullen.

So here I am, five weeks pregnant with Edward Cullens child.


Love it hate it?

I like it. My fingers hurt, but who the eff cares?

Not me.


Please review?

Ashley ("