Hello all, I've been wanting to do a SGA/NCIS crossover for awhile but never got 'round to it. Finally I just sat down and wrote it. Hope you enjoy it.

Disclaimer: I own neither Stargate Atlantis or NCIS, but gods if I did the hotness that would abound or would have in the case of SGA (whatever happened to the promised SGA movie?)

Tony smiled to himself as he followed half of the Atlantis premiere gate team back through the wormhole. It had to be said that he was enjoying his stint on the A-Team as it were, while Specialist Ronon Dex was out with a broken leg. Even though there was quite a black market of various DVDs going around Atlantis, for sheer entertainment value the comedic stylings of Sheppard and McKay couldn't be beat. Today's mission had started out decently enough with McKay picking up an interesting energy signature within minutes of arriving on the planet. The natives had even seemed happy enough to meet them until the headman's daughter began making googoo eyes at the Colonel, at which time they were asked to leave. McKay had been building up a good rant the whole walk back to the gate, which didn't stop upon returning to Atlantis.

"I'm just saying Colonel, couldn't you keep it in your pants this one time."

The Colonel gave McKay a glare as he handed his P-90 to one of the marines on guard.

"Look Rodney for the last time, I didn't do anything. She came onto me all by herself."

McKay snorted as Elizabeth came towards them. She tried to contain her laughter but couldn't keep the grin off her face.

"I take it this is another planet where we're not welcome to return."

Sheppard was about to reply but couldn't beat out McKay.

"Oh I'm sure we would be welcome back as long as the oh so charming Colonel doesn't return; he snagged another chieftan's daughter."

McKay's mocking was overridden by the sounds of high-pitched squealing and pounding boots, but he wasn't deterred

"It seems as if you have another adoring fan Colonel."

Both McKay and Sheppard were surprised though to hear the, "Oh Crap," coming from their temporary team member. They were even more surprised to see him hurriedly push his weapon aside and seemingly brace for impact. Neither knew quite what to make of the tall woman in the short plaid skirt and combat boots who hurtled herself onto DiNozzo.

"Tony, I've missed you so much. You just left us without a word. I mean I know the team left once Gibbs jumped ship but you still had me, Ducky, and Palmer. We should have been enough."

Tony braced one arm underneath Abby as she wrapped her legs around his waist and used the other to rub soothing circles on her back.

"I'm sorry Abs. I didn't mean to hurt you."

Abby dropped her legs and took a step back to make sure he was serious. Seeing the solemnity of his green eyes she nodded before giving him a swift slap to the back of the head and smiling.

"I forgive you but don't do it again. Do you know how much hacking," Abby paused and looked at all the surrounding military types, "um, I mean digging I had to do to find where you'd gone. Then I tracked down a General O'Neill and told him I had to come here to get you. And Tony, I flew on a ship but they wouldn't let me bring my coffin- on the plus side Bert became the first hippo to travel to another galaxy. I had to go through all this just to find you and yell at you."

Tony smiled and bowed over her hand before giving it a kiss.

"All part of the DiNozzo package, we aim to please our customers."

Abby grinned before taking his hand and walking towards the nearest hallway.

"C'mon Tony, show me everything there is to see about this place."

Tony grinned before looking over to the stunned expedition leader who's mouth was agape.

"Permission to be excused ma'am?"

Elizabeth Weir could only nod helplessly as she looked around the gate room and took in the astonished features of the personnel present. Everyone was so silent you could hear a pin drop. As a result everyone was clearly able to hear the departing duo's conversation as Abby leaned into Tony as if imparting a great secret.

"Did you know that we're in a floating alien city in another galaxy?"

Tony nodded his head seriously as he passed his hand over the sensor of a transporter and the doors whooshed open.

"I had heard that. But did you know that we're also facing life-sucking vampires with a serious jones for leather and tats?"

The doors closed but not before everyone in the gate room heard Abby's response.

"That is so awesome."

There was silence for several seconds before Rodney McKay voiced what everyone was thinking.

"What the hell was that?"

Sheppard shook his head before a grin took over his face.

"I don't know but I can't wait to see when she meets Ronon and Teyla."

El fin.


Creator of chaos and destruction since 1982

I hope you all enjoyed, please review.