Layman here, with another Omake! (Seriously, this is the last one, I promise.) This one a actually more of a deleted/alternate scene, writen by the inestimable Alex McMullen. His and my writing styles are a bit different, as I'm sure you'll notice as you read on.
There are a few reasons why I didn't use this version straight up (By the way, thanks for the help, Alex. This gave me the extra push I needed to finish this fic up.), not the least of witch is the one mentioned above. The rest will be catagorized in the form of commentary.
Also, let it be known that I apriciate Alex's help with this very much, regardless of whatever legitimate complaints I have about this scene.
Let me reiterate one last time that these are just my personal writing preferences and are not condemnations of Alex's or anyone else's writing styles. Thank you very much.
...."I'd love to," she said cheerily, "but unfortunately, I don't think I can."
"Why ever not?" Isshida asked.
"Becuase I don't eat with scum that let adultery happen in their midst," With almost inhuman speed she unsheathed the wakizashi again and slashed the old priest's throat. He gargled for a second on his own blood, and slumped over dead. "I just eat them," she said, licking the blood of the sword.
Too tired to feast again, she left the three corpses in the cellar, proceeding back the way she came. As she trudged around a corner she bumped into something.(OK, first complaint; Momo is not nearly this tired. She's all hyped up on rage, adrenaline, and insanity. Would You be that exhausted if you were her?) Momo fell back and landed on her back. She gazed angrily at the disturbance which turned out to be the young girl from dinner.
(Second complaint; Momo meeting Rukia happens just a bit too fast. It kinda doesn't fit the vibes of the rest of the story)
"Hinamori-Chan?...Why are you covered in blood?!" The girl asked.
"Who are you?" Momo snarled, ignoring the question.
"R-Rukia...Why?" The girl asked in an unstable voice.
"Did you follow me?" Momo interrogated the poor girl.
"N-no, I swear! I came down to explore the area and got lost. I heard voices so I came here." Rukia explained herself as Momo rose to her feet and dusted off her bloodied kimono. (You see, that scenario was just used a few paragraphs ago. You might not be able to tell, but throughout this story I've always tried to keep every next scene orginal from the last one.) Rukia studied the strange woman and her gaze fell across something attached to her hip. "Is...Is that a sword?"
(Yes it's a sword, and Momo knows this perfectly well)
"You know what, I think it is!" Momo cackled insanely and Rukia backed away nervously. "Don't be frightened," Momo whispered gently, a simple facade. "I won't hurt you."
Rukia relaxed slightly. "Well...I better get going. My uncle must be waiting for me. Goodbye!" Rukia jogged off past Momo and stumbled upon the remains of Hinamori's victims. Momo did not move, merely closing her eyes as a shrill scream escaped the lips of the scared girl.
"What happened to these people?!" Rukia shrieked.
Momo stalked the girl and breathed down her neck. "I killed them." Her voice was a harsh whisper that made Rukia's blood freeze in her veins. "Now I have to kill you too." She nuzzled Rukia's neck in a display of affection but the girl jumped away. (Didn't Momo just say she wasn't going to kill her? And waht set her off? Even the most insane person doesn't kill anyone unless A.) they've already gone berserk, or B.) the victim does something that sends the crazy over the edge.)
Rukia's eyes darted about frantically and with no other option, she ran.
Momo giggled and followed, hurling taunts and threats at her. They chased each other through the winding passages and through the narrow halls, all of which seemed to lead nowhere. Rukia finally found some stairs and she tried to vault up them, three at a time, but she tripped and grazed her chin on the stone steps. Momo closed the gap and strolled leisurely up the stairs to her prey.
"Poor little thing...Your uncle would be devastated if he had to live without you...maybe I should end everyone's pain?" Momo's face twitched. "Yes...I'll drown everyone's sorrows in flames!" She laughed maniacally and Rukia suddenly charged. She barged into the deranged psycopath and knocked her down a few steps onot the rocky floor.
Momo growled like an animal and unsheathed the washikazi. (For the record, it's spelled "wakizashi".) She lunged at Rukia who clambered up a few steps to a safe distance. Momo followed, slashing wildly. Rukia crawled on her hands and knees, desperately trying to escape.
Momo jabbed the blade at Rukia's back, but she leapt up in time to avoid possible paralysis, only to have the blade sink into her calf muscle. She cried out in agony, but resumed her climb. Momo screeched like a banshee as she further pursued her injured opponent. As she closed in, Rukia kicked out with her good leg. She caught Momo full in the chest and she was flung back. Without hesitation, Rukia clambered up the remaining stairs and pushed a door open, collapsing into the next room. She swiftly dragged the door closed behind her.
Momo's irate roars were audible from inside the darkened room. Rukia leaned against something like a wooden barrel and tried to calm herself. She ran out of time when Momo began bashing the door.
"Let me in!!"
Rukia curled up into a ball and sobbed. She didn't want to die. She was still too young. She had so much to experience. It couldn't end like this!
The door splintered and a flicker of light reflected off the blade which had gone straight through. The sword was yanked out and hacked at the door again. (OK, by now you should be starting to see the similarities a bit more clearly, such as Momo hacking apart the door. Obviously the way these ideas were use is different, but I've been one to throw away a good thing.)
Rukia whimpered as the door slowly fell apart under the vicious attacks of a mad, sword-wielding woman. When the door finally crumbled, Momo stormed in. A flood of light spilled into the front of the room and illuminated a small portion of the wine cellar.
Rukia limped away from the front and manouvred around the rows of barrels. She approached a weak flame coming from the far wall, a torch. In the silent room, Hinamori's footsteps sounded like individual thunder strikes.
"Where are you?!" Momo called out to the darkness.
Rukia did not answer. She hid behind a barrel next to the torches and watches as a dark shape came into form. Hinamori looked like a monster. There was nothing human about her anymore. Her vile grin remained on her face and her wide eyes fell on the spot right in front of Rukia's huddled body.
Rukia held her breath and Hinamori lost interest, reaching out to take the torch instead.
"Come out come out, wherever you are." Momo sneered insidiously.
Rukia knew there was no escape, she would have to fight for her life to ever see the light of day again. Reluctantly, she gathered up all her courage and rose unsteadilly to her feet. The torch-light flitted across her and quickly returned.
"Found you!" Momo snarled. Shadows danced across her face and hid her eyes from view. The vacant orbs of darkness made her appear even more terrifying, but Rukia stood her ground.
"I...Will stop you!" Rukia said. (Rukia's resolve to stop the monster that Momo degenerated into is another thing I kept in my version. Actually, I'd been planning something like that since before Mr. McMulllen wrote this whole scene, but it's nice to know I have a like-minded friend out there. Besides, "great minds think alike" or something like that....)
Hinamori cackled and dashed forward, dropping the torch in the process. The flaming torch rolled up next to a barrel and remained there. Meanwhile, Rukia rolled away from an overhead swing. She misjudged her space and slammed into a barrel. She winced as her left arm went numb and definitely bruised. Momo spared no mercy and swung again, this time intending to cleave Rukia's head from her shoulders. Luckily, she ducked and the blade cut into the wine barrel, spilling it's alcoholic blood onto the floor.
Rukia limped off, in search of a more open battlefield, but someone tackled her. She fell face-first onto the ground and before she could roll over she was stabbed through her side. The blade tore through her kidney and into the floor beneath. She screamed as her blood mixed with the wine. Momo knealed down and lapped up a mouthful of it and moaned.
"Delecious. I shall celebrate your sacrifice with the wine of death." Momo chanted. (Oops, this is something I didn't incorporate into mine. Momo's not suppose to be a sociopath (though you do write them scarily well, Mr. McMullen), just insane and jealous with rage. In short, it didn't quite fit the atmosphere.)
With a grunt of effort, Rukia placed her hands firmly on the blade of the weapon and she wrenched it out of herself. Momo jumped back in surprise as Rukia rolled over and gripped the handle of the Washikaze, now turning it against it's master.
Momo rushed in for a bare-handed strike, but Rukia ducked to one side and drove the blade up through Momo's stomach and out of her back. Momo gargled and spat blood on the floor, but gave no indication of feeling any pain. Rukia continued to run forward until the pinned the blade into another barrel, trapping Momo there.
Hinamori thrashed about, only making her wound bigger. A dark red stain spread over her kimono as her movements became more sluggish.
Wordlessly, Rukia made her slow escape, limping painfully towards the exit.
"Get back here dammit!!" Momo roared. "I'll kill you!! I'll kill everyone!!"
Rukia made it to the door when she saw the sudden burst of light. The wine barrels exploded in a sea of flames which spread to the front in a matter of seconds. Rukia was thrown off her feet and she tumbled awkwardly down the stairs, landing in a broken heap at the bottom. (I don't know, this death scene just didn't speak vloumes to me. It's not a bad one, but again it just didn't mesh with the rest of the story.)
The fire spread throughout the shrine and a fortunate few were evacuated in time. The rest were burned to ashes, just like the once great shrine. As the last standing structures in the shrine collapsed, the insane cries of Momo Hinamori could still be heard, a haunting song that carried over the breeze and into the surrounding forest. (It's my personal philosophy that the more abrupt or open-ended a horror piece ends, the scarier it'll be. This ending just seemed to final, esspecially since there a whole other story that comes after this.)
So anyways, that's another way to read the end of the second Omake. I hope you all enjoyed this fic, and hope that you'll read my other Horror pieces if you did. Thanks once again to Alex McMullen for writing this scene and helping me get the inspiration I needed to finish it up.
Now that this is all done, I can work on "Higurashi; Angel's wings" some more. I really recomend you read it.
Peace in the Middle East,