Disclaimer: I don't own Sammy or his tears. Takes place during Lucifer Rising.
Inspiration: Wind Beneath My Wings – RyanDan Version
I picked up my clothes and I threw them into the duffle bag on the bed. I sighed as I picked up more of my belongings. I was about to throw them too into the bag when I heard a rustle of paper. I hunted threw the clothes in my fist until I found the paper.
It was a little kid's drawing. My drawing. I had drawn it when I was five, and it was of Dean. He had a big D on his chest and a badly drawn cape. Underneath I had written, Supa Dean. I had given it to him afterwards and he had ruffled my hair and proclaimed it, "Great, Sammy, thanks."
I wish I could go back to the days when I believed that Dean was a superhero, him and Dad, and that they'd protect me from anything. I say Dad, but it was mostly Dean. When Dad had given the .45 when I was nine, Dean had actually gone into my closet and showed me that there was nothing there. And then when I still didn't really believe him, he stayed in my room with me promising, "Nothing will get you while I'm here, Sammy, you go to sleep."
He had looked after me my whole life and what had I done to repay him? I had abandoned him for a demon we had known for all of two years. What was I doing? He would always make sure I was taken care of before himself and made sure I was okay after my fights with Dad. He would make sure I was happy and I had everything I needed before going out with some girl from school. He was the best big brother that I could have asked for.
I heard my phone go off. I didn't bother answering it, I wasn't in the mood for chit chat. Then when I glanced over and I saw the number I rushed to pick it up. But I was too late, Dean was already gone. But he had left a message. I hit play.
"Listen to me you blood-sucking freak. Dad always said I'd either have to save you or kill you. Well, I'm giving you fair warning. I'm done trying to save you. You're a monster, Sam, a vampire. You're not you anymore. And there's no going back."
I stood in shock as his message played out. I felt my tears over spill in start rolling down my face. I could hardly think. The only thought in my head was that he was right. I was a freak and a monster. I shook my head trying to clear it. I quickly wiped away the tears and I put a look of steely determination on my face.
If that's how he wanted it to be then fine. I had been wishing that I could be like him, but now I realised that I never could be. He was my hero, he always was even when we fought and fell out. But I couldn't be that for anyone. I was going to stop the apocalypse, without my older brother holding my hand through it. For once I was going to do something without Dean there to save me if something went wrong.
I heard the motel door open. "Sam? You coming?"
I knew without looking that it was Ruby. I quickly rubbed under my eyes one last time and I crumpled the paper still in my hand. I quickly zipped up the duffle bag and slung it over my shoulder. "Yeah," I muttered.
I saw her nod when I turned around. She walked back out the door and I followed her. I switched off the light and I gave the room one last glance, before I closed the door.